Read Her Shameful Secret Online
Authors: Susanna Carr
Tags: #Fiction, #Romance, #Contemporary, #Contemporary Women, #General
“Which you decided to fix by staying with him?” he asked, poking holes in her story. “How would that repair anything?”
“Giovanni told me it would all blow over and I believed him.” She shook her head at her obvious mistake. “And, like a fool, I kept trying to contact you. He convinced me that I wasn’t going to get you back by crying myself to sleep every night. He suggested I go out, act like I was having a good time, and remind you of what you were missing.”
She’d done that very well. It had been difficult for him, coming back to this apartment every evening and knowing she wouldn’t be there. Knowing she was in another man’s bed. “You went out with Gio every night.”
She nodded and slumped against the window.
“There were pictures of you and Gio in the papers. Every day.” She had looked happy, relaxed and very sexy.
“I wasn’t trying to make you jealous,” she insisted. “Since I couldn’t see or talk to you, it was my way of reminding you that I was still around.”
“Clinging to his arm?” he added sharply.
Isabella scowled at him. “I did no such thing.”
Antonio remembered how she’d used to cling to
him
. She’d curled up against him whether they were walking along the street, sitting on the sofa, or making love. It had been as though she couldn’t get close enough. And he had welcomed the warmth and affection.
“In those tiny dresses.”
Isabella blushed. She looked away and turned until her back pressed against the window. “That was probably a bad idea.”
“Dresses that Gio bought you.” They had been short, tight and revealing. The kind of dresses a man gave his mistress. “When you wouldn’t accept any gift from me.”
“I didn’t have anything acceptable to wear to those events,” she mumbled as she flattened her hands against the glass pane.
“And I didn’t take you anywhere but to bed?”
She looked up sharply. “That’s not true! We had so much fun exploring the city. I got to see Rome through your eyes.”
“Obviously that wasn’t enough.”
He
wasn’t enough, no matter what he had done and what he had given. “But you made up for lost time by attending every nightclub.”
“I wasn’t interested in those parties. Or those people. I preferred the places we went to alone.”
He’d like to believe that. When he had learned she
was an art history student he had gone out of his way to take her to see private art collections and participate in specially guided tours. He had ignored all invitations to dinner parties and exclusive events because he hadn’t wanted to share Isabella.
He’d thought she had felt the same. Isabella had never complained, or asked to go dancing. Isabella had never felt a need to dress up or entertain. The only other person who’d spent any time with them was his brother.
“If any of this is true, what made you leave Gio?”
She pressed her lips together. “I discovered that Giovanni was not my friend. He pounced when I was at my most vulnerable.”
Antonio waited, but she didn’t reveal any more details. “You’ll have to do better than that.”
Isabella exhaled slowly. “And then I found out about the lies he had spread. I was not unfaithful to you, and I don’t know why you would have believed him. You should have confronted me,” Isabella said, her voice wavering with emotion. “You should have told me about your suspicions.”
He should have, but he knew what would have happened. He would have accepted her version because he’d wanted to believe her. He had wanted to be with her at any cost. Even now her story seemed plausible, even though she was carrying his brother’s baby.
“But you cast me out.” She gestured to the front door with a flutter of her hand. “You had your security staff do your dirty work. I would never have thought you’d take the coward’s way out.”
He had been cold and ruthless, but it had been an act of self-preservation. Isabella would have wrapped her
magic around him, distracted him from the truth and made him believe anything.
Like she was doing now.
Right now he wanted to lean into Isabella. Sink into her soft, warm curves. Erase the past and drag her back to his bed. He was fighting her lure, but it was a losing battle. Her power over his senses, his mind, was humbling.
“How am I the coward?” he asked. “You ran away when you saw me.”
“Why do you seem so surprised? I knew that seeing you again would destroy everything I’ve done so far to recover.”
Her
actions had caused her downfall, not his. “And that’s why it’s imperative that you return to America?” he asked. “Why do you need to leave immediately?”
“I want to go home and start over again.” Her mournful voice pulled at him. “I want to forget Italy and everything that happened here.”
Her words tore at him. Isabella had been the most important part of his life. Everything had fallen by the wayside when they were together. He had treated her like a queen and put her needs first, but it hadn’t been enough for her.
Now she wanted to forget all that. She would move on while he stayed behind, haunted by memories wherever he went.
“I want to forget you.”
He flinched as if he had been stabbed. No, he wouldn’t let that happen. They’d shared heaven together and now they would share hell. He wasn’t going to be the only one in torment. He would not carry the burden alone.
“I won’t let you,” he said. He stood in front of her, trapping her against the window. “I’m going to make you remember what we had and you will regret everything you did to destroy it.”
CHAPTER FIVE
A
NTONIO’S
kiss was hot, hard and possessive. Isabella felt the kick of exhilaration before it rushed through her bloodstream. Her skin heated as she softened against him.
The flare in his dark eyes had been her only warning before his mouth claimed hers. At first she didn’t fight it. She’d never thought she’d get the chance again, and his kiss was just as magical as she remembered.
Raw emotions crashed through her as she responded to his rough, hard mouth. He tasted of sensual, masculine power and a secret part of her wanted to surrender. Her heart pounded against her chest. Her flesh prickled with anticipation.
Isabella knew she needed to pull away. She had to stop this madness before she passed the point of no return. Had to break the spell. She had to find a way to keep her distance from Antonio.
Following her most primal instinct, Isabella sank her teeth into his bottom lip.
Antonio reared back. The red mark on his mouth should have made her feel guilty, but it gave her a dark satisfaction seeing her brand on him. She felt the angry puff of his breath and risked a look at his eyes.
An unholy glow leapt in them, and his face was taut with lust. Excitement lit through her body. She had unleashed something wickedly sensual she didn’t think she could control.
Antonio crushed her against him, his strong arms caging her. She gasped as her breasts pressed hard against his chest. He plowed his hands into her hair, pushing the rubber band free before tangling his fingers into the long tresses. There was no escape, she realized as he kissed her.
Antonio easily broke through her resistance as his tongue plunged into her mouth. She had physically ached from the loss of this passion. This was what she wanted back in her life, whatever the consequences.
Isabella surrendered and sagged against Antonio. She grabbed onto his shoulders, needing to hold something solid as her world spun crazily. Her hands skimmed his back and she clutched his shirt, bunching the fine linen in her fists.
Antonio’s growl of triumph vibrated deep in his chest. The sound tugged deep inside her as she rolled her hips restlessly against him.
Isabella skimmed her hands over his broad chest, shoving his tie to one side. Her fingers fumbled with urgency against his strong neck before she speared her fingers through his thick hair. She ground her mouth against his, craving another taste of him.
Antonio groaned with pleasure as he delved his tongue past her lips. Her skin tingled with anticipation as she drew him in deeper. He dominated and conquered her mouth, leaving her breathless.
He leaned in and trapped her firmly against the window with his body. Isabella wanted to feel his hands all
over her, wanted him to pleasure her as only he could. She rubbed her hips against his thick arousal, teasing him until his fingers clamped down on her waist. Antonio held her still, the strength and size of his hands sending a thrill down her spine.
Tearing his mouth away from hers, Antonio muttered something in Italian against her cheek that she didn’t catch. He slanted his mouth against her throat and laved her heated skin with the tip of his tongue. Isabella fisted his hair and tilted her head back, offering him free rein.
As he caressed her neck with his lips Antonio brushed his fingertips against the hem of her T-shirt. Her breath caught in her throat as he glided his hands along her ribcage. Isabella pressed her hands flat on the window behind her, arching her spine, brazenly offering herself to Antonio as he grazed his fingers along the underside of her breasts.
Isabella swallowed hard as impatient need swirled inside her. Her legs trembled, her heart raced and desire clawed through her. She felt a hint of feminine pride as she watched his chest rise and fall rapidly as he fought for restraint. She knew then that he too felt the relentless compulsion, but he was trying to control it.
Isabella didn’t want him to hold back. She needed Antonio to act on the wild desire that pulsated between them. She had to relive this feeling one more time.
She reached for Antonio’s necktie and pulled it free. The silk hadn’t landed on the floor before she tore at his shirt buttons, her fingers scrabbling with haste. She parted the fine linen, exposing Antonio’s golden-brown chest. Clutching the shirt with both hands, Isabella dragged him closer, until the hard, aching tips
of her breasts rubbed against the coarse black hair on his chest.
Isabella moaned as her nipples tightened against the soft cotton of her T-shirt. She wanted to feel his skin on her. Isabella shoved Antonio’s shirt off his powerful shoulders, desperate to feel more of him. She wanted all of him.
“Say my name,” he said roughly as he dragged her shirt up.
“Anto—” Isabella frowned, momentarily confused, until it dawned on her why he’d made that request. Did he believe she was thinking of Giovanni? She gasped against his mouth as hurt ricocheted inside her. Flattening her hands against his hard chest, she tried to push him away. “How dare you?” she said in a whisper.
“Your eyes were closed,” he mocked. “And you weren’t saying anything. I wanted to make sure you knew which brother you were kissing.”
Her palms stung with the need to slap him hard. She had surrendered to Antonio against her better judgment, but he’d seen it as another way to insult her. She shook with anger as she curled her hands into fists. “Get away from me.”
Antonio ignored her command and grabbed her wrists. She tried to break his hold but he easily raised her hands high above her head. He held her captive and she was at his mercy.
He leaned against her until his body was flush with hers. As much as she tried to fight it her body softened, welcoming him closer. His heat, his scent clouded her mind. The fierce pounding of her heart matched his.
“Were you thinking of him when you kissed me?” he asked in a drawl.
“No!” How could he think that? Couldn’t he tell that all she wanted—all she had ever wanted—was him? She rocked against Antonio in an attempt to break free.
He captured her earlobe between his teeth. Isabella stilled as the nip sent a shower of sensation through her veins.
“Does he kiss like me?” he whispered in her ear. “Do we taste the same?”
Fury and lust whipped through her body. “You are disgusting.” But most of all she was disgusted with herself. How could she respond to his touch so immediately while he said those hurtful words?
“Did you think of me when he was deep inside you?”
“Stop it!”
Antonio rested his forehead against hers. “I want to erase his claim on you,” he confessed in a harsh whisper. “I want to take you to bed and make you forget Gio.”
“I am not going to bed with you.” She wanted to. Oh, how she wanted to drag him to his bed and make love all night long. But her heart would never recover. Isabella knew he would kick her out in the morning. The hurt, the pain of his rejection, would overshadow any pleasure he’d given her.
He didn’t reply. Instead he dipped his head and trailed a row of soft kisses along the line of her clenched jaw. Isabella shut her eyes, her anticipation escalating as intense sensations billowed through her.
“I mean it,
Antonio
,” she said, emphasizing his name. “I will not sleep with a man who thinks so little of me.”
She felt his mouth curve into a smile. “Bella, we both know that’s not true.”
He was right, and his certainty was humiliating.
Antonio knew the power he held over her. One touch, one kiss and she wouldn’t deny him. She would make love to him anywhere, at any time. And she had.
Antonio met her gaze, his dark eyes blurred with desire. “I only have to say the word and you would surrender completely.”
Her skin flushed hotly. The only thing that kept her glaring right back at him was the reminder that there had been times when
he
had surrendered. When she had tapped into his fantasies. Once she’d had this power over
him
.
Antonio claimed her mouth with his. Just when she thought she couldn’t take it anymore Antonio captured her tongue and drew on it hard. She moaned as she felt the pull go deep into her pelvis. Pleasure spilt through her.
“So responsive,” he murmured against her mouth. “You must have learned a lot in my brother’s bed.”
She turned her head sharply and avoided his mouth. If only she could avoid his words. She couldn’t protect herself from his anger. From his accusations. He wanted to get close enough so she could share his pain, but she suspected he was getting caught in his own trap. And, even though he treated her like the enemy, she still clung to him.