Hexad: The Ward (28 page)

"Oh."

"What, you okay? I'm not, my head feels like it's ready to explode. What is this place, Tellan? How can it..."

"I'm fine. No, I'm not fine, but..."

"Allow me to explain. Dale, to answer your question first." Tellan crossed his legs and frowned, thinking of a way to explain. "This is my home, this is where The Caretaker lives. Where I, um, well, it's where I do what I do: look after things. What you saw, out there, that's the problem I am facing at the moment. All this time travel business has messed up a lot of my work, although it's better than it was, thanks to you two, but it's also getting worse again, and that too, I'm afraid, is thanks to you both."

"But it isn't, is it?" Amanda leaned forward in her chair, eyes bright and clear, hair shining orange with the reflected glow of the fire. "It isn't our fault, not really. It's because of you. I knew there was something, a feeling, something forcing its way up into my thoughts but I could never quite get a hold of it. All the terrible things that have happened to us, to me, and all those things you told me and Dale had happened before, to us, or other versions of us, it's all your fault. Isn't it, Dad?"

"What!?" Dale was out of his chair, stood between Tellan and Amanda, staring from one to the other as if he could figure it out that way.

Tellan said nothing.

"Dale, he's my father. I don't know how, as I had a mother and a father, and I loved them dearly, but it's what was bugging me. Him, he's my father." Amanda pointed a finger in accusation at Tellan.

He smiled a faint smile. Sorrow so deep was etched into the curve of his mouth it looked like he'd just witnessed the death of worlds, and Amanda supposed he probably had. A single tear fell onto his shirt collar.

Amanda watched as it stained the white then soaked in and faded like everything else seemed to do.

Going Home

Time Unknown

"I'm sorry. You have to understand, it's out of my control. I loved you, love you still, so very much, but I am powerless. I can't seem to get things to fit back together properly. You belong here, with me, Amanda. My daughter."

"No, no, no. This can't be happening, this can't be real. I know it but I can't handle it. This place, this terrible place, it's like it's clawing its way inside of me. I'm going to break, crack like an egg and just spill out and be nothing. I want to go home. Dale, I need to go home, now." Amanda was falling, her mind receding to an empty place, a white place where thoughts were nothing but fluffy clouds and she could sit in a corner and hum to herself and everything was all right. She clutched at Dale, clawed at his clothes, grabbed for the Hexad he still held.

Dale stared at Tellan then Amanda, and looked at the Hexad. "I'm sorry, it won't work. It's used up, dead."

"No, Dale, we have to go. I want to go home."

"You are home, my dear, this is your home."

"No, I want to go home, with Dale, and for everything to be how it was. Why is this happening? What did you do?"

Tellan rose, and for the first time Amanda saw him as he truly was: a man so old it held no meaning. Ancient, enduring, always there. "So be it."

~~~

Present Day (Frozen)

"We're home. We're back home! Ugh."

"Amanda, Amanda!"

The carpet rushed up to greet her, or was she falling to the carpet? It didn't matter. Peace, there would be peace, maybe forever? She hoped so. "Ow, ow, ow." There was no oblivion, no rest from the madness, just a raw carpet burn on her cheek and a headache she didn't think could get worse than it already was. And the most ridiculous thing of all? All she could think of was that the carpet smelled nice — the powder she used before she vacuumed really worked a treat. Now it would be ruined; they had their shoes on.

"Are you okay?" Dale squatted beside her and helped her to sit. "Look at your face. That damn man."

"By damn man I assume you're talking about me?" Tellan was right there in the room with them, looking concerned as he stepped closer.

"Stay away from me!" shrieked Amanda, as she clambered to her feet. "This is your fault, all of it. You and your stupid bloody games. You've known all along that this wasn't our problem, yet you made us believe it was. How long has this been going on, all this, this madness? How many versions of us have you told your stupid story to and then let run around like headless chickens trying to put something right you knew was impossible to fix? Tell me!"

"Calm down, Amanda, calm down. Look, you'll make yourself ill."

"Don't tell me to calm down. Dale, don't you see? He's done all of this. What's next, eh? I suppose I'll be locked up again, or we'll—"

"Hey, guys. Oh!" Peter paused, hand in mid-air as he reached for another HobNob from the pack he clutched as if they were made from gold.

Amanda got a funny feeling, if it was possible to feel funnier than she already did. She stared at Peter, then at Tellan, then back again. "You know each other. You do, don't you?"

"What? Don't be silly, how would they know each other? Peter?" Dale entwined his fingers through Amanda's to help calm her.

She loved him, she really did, but was there no end to this madness? When would it all be over? She just wanted to sleep, rest and never wake up.

"They do, Dale, look at him. Peter looks guilty as hell."

"Guys, um, please, let me explain." Peter turned to Tellan, snacks forgotten. "Did you tell them? You did, didn't you?"

"No, I didn't tell them, there wasn't time. It hardly seemed appropriate anyway."

"Will someone please tell me what the hell is happening?" shouted Dale. He let go of Amanda and waved his arms about manically, close to the edge of losing it.

"Um, Dale, I guess you could say I'm your brother-in-law."

"What? This is too much. He's her father, you're Amanda's brother." Peter and Tellan nodded.

"I'll put the kettle on," said Peter, and walked into the kitchen.

Amanda collapsed onto the sofa; Dale sat next to her. She let him put his arm around her and she leaned into it, grateful for the closeness and something familiar in a world that no longer made sense.

"I think you have a helluva lot of explaining to do. More than that, what if they show up? Hector or that damn giant of his," added Dale.

"They won't," said Tellan.

"How do you know?"

"Because he's The Caretaker," said Peter, as he came in with mugs of coffee on a tray.

"Um, that was quick," said Dale. Amanda didn't even want to think about it, Peter making an impossibly quick cup of coffee was the least of her concerns.

"I've told you about that," admonished Tellan, "it confuses people."

"Sorry, didn't think it mattered now."

"Didn't think what mattered?" asked Amanda, curious even though she didn't really care.

"Time's different for us, we can bend the rules, break them too. It's, er, what got you into this trouble in the first place."

"Got me into this trouble? After I just find out about my father, and a brother who is our friend and... Oh, who cares?" Amanda rested her head back on Dale and watched as Peter put the tray down on the table.

"Look, guys, I tried to help, to avoid all this... hassle, but now you've met Dad I don't suppose it matters. Shall I tell them, Dad?" Tellan nodded. Peter nibbled on a HobNob, face doing the weird scrunch thing he always did when he concentrated, then said, "Look, it's complicated, that goes without saying, but, well, first of all, don't worry about anyone coming to get you, we're sort of in limbo here, in a place with no time. Between the cracks, I suppose you could say."

"Yeah, okay, Peter," said Dale.

"Don't believe me? Look at Wozzy." Peter pointed to Wozzy over by the sideboard where he'd clearly been watching the birds — or the squirrel — through the window.

"Oh, that's just great, anything else we should know?" Amanda surprised herself by not melting down at the sight of Wozzy in mid-air, frozen in time where he'd begun to jump to the ground so he wouldn't get told off.

"Lots," said Peter.

"Just tell me what the hell is happening." Amanda knew she sounded hysterical but was well past caring. Too much had happened for any of it to come as a surprise now.

"I think I better explain this, Peter, but thank you for trying," said Tellan. He took a mug then sat cross-legged on the floor after unbuttoning his jacket.

"If you tell me you could have stopped all this from happening then I am going to kill you," warned Dale.

"There's no need for that, Dale, and besides, I think you'd have a little trouble," said Tellan.

Amanda noted how Peter had changed from the rather dorky guy she knew to an intimidating man stood next to Tellan. He seemed to have grown half a foot as his posture improved. She sighed. "Just tell us."

An Explanation

Present Day (Frozen)

"We've been fighting so long to put a stop to this, but we can't." Tellan paused for a drink. Amanda tried, and failed, to ignore the suspended Wozzy. "Everything we try, it ends up more confused than before we started. It's been happening for what seems like forever, right, Peter?" Peter nodded. "We solve one problem, only to find ourselves deep in another. I've tried showing no interest and leaving you two to get on with it, I've tried interfering, I've tried being aloof, giving you as much help as I can, everything, and nothing works. The Hexads keep coming back, coming back for you, Amanda. I'm sorry, my dear, it breaks my heart, more than you could know, but there you have it, the truth."

"What do you mean coming back for me? Why? Why do they want me? Why this damn spinal fluid thing? It makes no sense at all. None of it." Amanda sat forward and stared hard at Tellan, trying not to think about what it meant now these two men were apparently her family, her blood. "Just how many times have you tried to sort this mess out?"

"Too many," said Peter, before zipping his mouth shut when he got a dirty look from Tellan, his father. Her father.

"Time has little meaning for us, Amanda, but it is a battle we have fought for a long time, a very long time."

"And you got nowhere?"

"Unfortunately, that is correct. We think everything has been put right, then up you get in the morning, or Dale, and you start the whole cycle again. Or something else happens, and whatever we do, whatever we try, Hexads are there and it all falls apart."

"But why, why me?"

"Because you are my daughter, family. You don't belong here, you belong with us."

"There, in that awful place?"

"Yes. It only feels strange because you don't remember, but that is where you belong. I'm sorry, we tried, but we failed. I can't bear to think of you repeating all this for eternity. Awful things happen, Amanda. The things that happen to you, I can't bear it."

"It's okay, Dad, don't get upset." Peter put an arm on his father's shoulder as Tellan bowed his head and the tears fell again. It was wrong seeing him cry, as if they weren't normal tears but held immense responsibility in the salty saline that drained the world of something, never to be returned. It didn't stop the anger and the pain that Amanda felt.

"Don't get upset! What about us? What could be worse than what I've just been through? Locked in that cell, drugged and made to think I'd lost my mind. Strapped down every week like all the other Amandas, and drained. Drained like a cow!"

"Much worse than that has happened, my dear, I'm sorry to say. Much worse."

Amanda couldn't imagine what could be worse and didn't want to know. She just wanted to stop it, find peace. "What about all those women still there in the future, in The Ward? What about Hector and Laffer and the Hexads? How do we stop this all repeating? There were more, more women in a large room, and Dale took me to a Factory or something, right, Dale?" Amanda turned to him, eyes pleading for him to help; all he did was look sad.

"I don't know. Whatever you do, something else will happen and we can't stop it, but we keep trying. We try to give you peace, give you what you want, but it will not work."

"What did I want? Explain it to me."

"This, you wanted this," said Tellan, voice like a child's, infinitely small and sad. "You wanted a normal life and you wanted to live in the world. You abandoned us."

"I don't remember any of this. Is it a trick? Are you trying to send me mad again? Put me back in The Ward and let me drift into insanity?"

"I want the opposite. I want you to come home more than anything in the world, but you wanted to leave, and this is what happened."

"Why?" It was a simple question, but there had to be an explanation.

"Why is it happening? Because you aren't where you are supposed to be. It got worse when you met Dale. He's your soul mate, I know this. Nothing will break you two up. You are always together, or if not then you are broken people in the worlds where something went wrong. It breaks my heart to see you like that. I've seen you in every possible outcome there could ever be, Amanda, and it tears me and your brother apart to watch as you lead all these lives, cling to each other and try to understand this mess."

"Why? Why Hexads?"

"Don't you see? It's the Universe, it wants you back with us. It does all it can to get you back. The Hexads, the whole reason they exist, it's to get you to jump back home, to stay with us."

"And what if I don't want to? What if I don't believe you? I want to stay with Dale."

"We know, and that's why we have tried to help, but it's impossible." Tellan deflated and his shoulders slumped, the proud man replaced by a frail old gentleman beaten by life, by the Universe.

"That's enough, Dad, come on, we have to go."

"Wait, you can't go. What will happen if you go?" Dale stood and turned to Amanda. "What will happen to her if you leave?"

"Exactly what has been happening already. Hector, or Laffer, or something else, it will catch up with you, take you again, and on it goes," said Peter. "I tried to help, played the part of the Peter you know, to assist if I could, and I've done it endless times with different scenarios, different 'bad guys' too." Peter made bunny ears; it wasn't as comical as it usually was. "If we leave you to it then in the future Amanda is in The Ward, this Amanda anyway, and a lot of others too, and there will be Hexads, and then it gets too much and it all sort of implodes on itself, but there will always be you, you will find a way, to be together."