Hidden Memories (20 page)

“Surely he wasn’t the only senator absent.”

“No. It’s just strange that he committed suicide. He had a wife and two kids, and a bright future in politics.”

“Who knows?” Ramion said, shrugging his shoulders. “By the way, I talked to Hayley.”

“What did she say?”

“She wouldn’t talk about it. But she’s something else. She sashays into my office in a slinky dress and heavy makeup. She acts like she’s twenty-five.”

“Don’t defend your uncle. He knows she’s just a teenager.”

“It’s more complicated than that.”

“How so? I admire her mother for taking the girls out of there, protecting her daughters from a horny old man.” She popped some peanuts into her mouth. “Many women wouldn’t do that. They would ignore the situation, pretend they don’t see or blame the daughter, the victim.”

“There’s more to it. This family is strange. I don’t know how to explain it. Flora Bell acts like she’s trying to protect her daughters, but I’m beginning to think she may have done it for herself.”

“What are you talking about?”

The waiter returned with their drinks and a fresh basket of peanuts.

Ramion took a long sip from his glass. “Uncle Walt was having sex with Hayley.”

Her eyebrows rose in surprise. Sage’s face was a mixture of disbelief and dismay.
“He admitted it?”

“Hayley did, and I believe her.”

“Just how long has he been raping her?”

“That’s just it. It wasn’t rape.”

The blonde hostess approached and escorted them to their table. Sage and Ramion followed the hostess, who chattered about the crowd and the unusually cold Atlanta weather. They slid into opposite sides of a booth.

“What do you mean?” Sage asked. Away from the front door and the bar, it was much quieter.

“It was consensual. Hayley’s no innocent girl. She’s young and hot, and flaunts her body like an invitation.”

“Wait a minute!” Sage said, gesturing with her hand. “Are you saying that she seduced him?”

“I don’t know who seduced whom, but they’ve been having sex, and Hayley has been a willing partner.”

“She’s still underage.”

The blonde hostess interrupted. “I’m so sorry. I forgot to give you menus,” she said, handing them large, plastic-coated menus. “Your waitress, Jane, will be right with you.”

“That’s where Uncle Walt is going to have legal problems.”

“He should. Even if they’ve been having consensual sex, she’s still a minor, and he’s guilty of statutory rape.”

“True, but she enjoyed it. Besides, it was her way of getting revenge against her mother.”

“Ramion, I hope you’re not trying to justify what your uncle did,” Sage said, frowning deeply from behind the wide menu.

“Flora Bell is the kind of woman who can’t keep a husband. She’s been married three times, and Uncle Walter is her fourth husband. I get the feeling that she’s more in to finding a man than raising her kids.” He paused to sip his drink, as did Sage. “I know my mother never liked her much, always said she was a loose woman.”

“Even if all that is true, Walter was dead wrong to have sex with a girl,” Sage said hotly.

“I agree, but this is about revenge. Uncle Walt got Hayley pregnant and made her have an abortion. I think this is her way of getting even. I don’t know if she wanted the baby or…”

* * * * *

Sage stopped listening to what Ramion was saying. In her mind, she traveled back to the one and only time she’d thought she might be pregnant. She was living with Aunt Maddie, who had picked her up the night her stepfather raped her, the night her mother threw her out of her home.

The memory flashed in Sage’s mind as if just happened.

Sage had waited for Aunt Maddie on the front porch. She huddled against the corner of the glider, her mind and body in turmoil.

“I will go inside and call Aunt Maddie again,” said Audra. She couldn’t look at Sage, and then mumbled, “I’m glad Ava and Aaron aren’t here.”

Tears ran down Sage’s face. “It’s not my fault,” she uttered with hurt and betrayal ringing in her voice.

“I don’t want them to know,” Audra whispered.

Sage wiped the tears from her face. “I won’t tell them.”

Audra went back inside the house, but stood near the doorway. Sage heard her mother speaking to her Aunt Maddie.

“You got my message?”

Sage did not know what Aunt Maddie said. She only heard her mother’s words: “Sage is waiting for you.”

Audra opened the door and spoke to her daughter. “She’s on her way.”

Her mother lingered at the door, but Sage could not bear to look at her.

Sage had waited for Aunt Maddie on the front porch. She huddled against the corner of the glider, her mind and body in turmoil.

Sage counted the minutes that passed while waiting for Aunt Maddie. She knew her aunt would believe her.

Maddie knew Sage felt uneasy around her stepfather. Sage had told her she would never stay alone in the house with Aaron. She didn’t feel safe. So, when Audra called her, Maddie immediately drove to Audra’s house.

Sage sat on the glider, wrapped in a bloodstained sheet, shivering even in the warmth of the summer night. The sky was filled with twinkling stars and a glowing full moon.

“What happened, baby?” Aunt Maddie asked, as she rushed up the porch stairs.

Sage was too ashamed to look at her aunt. She couldn’t find the words to describe what happened to her, nor the emotions to convey how she felt. They were caught in the hurricane that was swirling inside her, strangling her and choking off her voice.

Maddie touched her niece’s face and threw her arms around her in a protective embrace. “It’s going to be all right, darlin’. It’s going to be all right,” she soothed, gently rubbing Sage’s face and kissing her forehead.

As Maddie reached for the suitcases that were sitting near the front door, she heard Audra slowly open the front door. Maddie spun around to confront Sage’s mother. “Audra, what the hell happened?”

Audra stared at both of them, then bent her head in shame.

“Audra, what happened to Sage? She’s been hurt. Look at those bruises and that ugly burn on her arm!”

“Take her,” Audra said softly, her voice sounding strange and unfamiliar to Sage.

Sage stood up from the glider and walked weakly toward the edge of the porch. Suddenly sure she was going to faint, Sage grabbed the porch’s railing for support. Her eyes locked with her mother’s. But they weren’t her mother’s eyes. Those eyes were wide and bewildered—they were the eyes of a stranger. “Mama, I didn’t do anything wrong! Please, Mama. Please believe me,” she pleaded.

Audra slammed the door so hard the porch shook.

It took Sage many years to close the door to the past, to bury the memory, to escape the pain. But it was finding its way back into her life.

Now, sitting in the noisy restaurant, she remembered the pain, the agony, the confusion, the despair. She remembered waiting for her period to come, counting the days when it didn’t. She remembered running to the bathroom every time she thought her period would show, and the engulfing fear she felt when she didn’t see red.

Sage couldn’t speak, wouldn’t talk, and didn’t utter any words until at last her period made its presence known, and she knew that there were no traces of her stepfather inside her.

When she finally spoke to Aunt Maddie, who had taken off work for two weeks to stay with her, she said, “I’m not pregnant. I don’t have to carry him inside me.”

Maddie’s face reflected joy and relief when she heard Sage’s voice, gritty with pain and anguish. Tears poured from Maddie’s eyes, and she embraced her niece, holding her tightly. “I love you, Sage. Release it, baby. Don’t carry it inside your soul. Free yourself from the pain. Banish it from your memory!”

* * * * *

“Sage!” Ramion said, waving his hand in her face. “Sage,” he repeated.

Those memories burned inside her, fresh as new snow, and when Sage looked over at Ramion, she saw the shadow of her stepfather.

“I don’t think you should represent him. He’s scum. What kind of man has sex with his stepdaughter? I don’t care if she paraded around the house nude. She’s underage, and he should go to jail for that.” Peering at the menu, she realized her appetite had suddenly vanished.

“You’re overreacting,” Ramion said.

“No, I’m not. He got her pregnant and made her have an abortion. That’s traumatic for a grown woman, let alone a teenager.”

“You think she should have had the baby?” Ramion asked.

“Ready to order?” their perky waitress, Jane, inquired while placing a basket of warm bread and butter on the table.

Ramion ordered pasta primavera, and Sage selected the mesquite-grilled chicken salad.

As the waitress walked away, Sage leaned in and said furiously, “No she shouldn’t have had the baby, but if he hadn’t been sleeping with her, she wouldn’t have gotten pregnant!”

“I agree with you. He was wrong. But he’s my uncle, and he can’t afford an attorney.” He smoothed soft honey butter on his wheat roll.

Her voice rising angrily, she said, “I can’t believe you’re going to represent him!” She picked up the cloth napkin wrapped around the place setting and it fell to the floor. She made no effort to pick up the utensils.

“It won’t be the first time I represented somebody that was guilty. He’s entitled to due process, and his legal rights must be protected.”

“Tell him to get a court-appointed attorney.”

“I’m sorry, Sage, but I can’t do that. I promised my father I would help Uncle Walt. He’s family.”

“What about the rights of a child to remain a child!” she shouted. Realizing how loud she was, she lowered her voice. Clenching her teeth, she said angrily, “And the rights of a teenager. Just because you have the body of a woman doesn’t mean you are a woman,” she said, banging her fist on the table. Glaring at Ramion, she stood up. “It’s obvious you know nothing about women and respect.”

“Baby, calm down. You’re taking this personally.”

“You’re damned right I am,” she said. “I’m not hungry! I’m going to take a cab home!” Sage grabbed her purse and stormed out of the restaurant.

* * * * *

It was after nine o’clock when Ramion left his office, and within thirty minutes of non-rush-hour traffic, he was pulling into his garage. His plans for the evening were to grab a bite to eat, read the mail and go to bed.

He unlocked the door and went into the kitchen. Flipping on the light switch, he placed his briefcase and jacket on the kitchen chair and opened the refrigerator. Three minutes later, he was swigging from a can of beer and munching on two-day-old pizza heated in the microwave.

He sorted through the mail on the way to his bedroom, where he absently pressed the switch plate to turn on the lights. He looked up, coming to a dead stop when he saw Edwinna lying on his waterbed, stretched out like a lion, wearing a leopard-printed teddy with garters and black stockings.

“Hello, baby,” she said with a devilish grin.

“Edwinna! What the hell are you doing here?”

“I wanted to see you.” Slinking over to the edge of the bed, she said, “Remember how much fun we used to have?” She spread her legs wide and slowly moved her hands to her breasts.

“I don’t remember it that way,” he said, his anger rising along with his manhood, which made him even angrier. “How did you get in here?”

“I had a key made a long time ago so that I could surprise you whenever I took a notion.”

“Nothing you do surprises me,” he said with a contemptuous scowl.

Edwinna rose up from the bed and pressed her perfume-scented body against his. “Oh, I think I’ve got a few tricks up my sleeve that could still surprise you.” She rubbed her hands against his thighs and pressed her hips against his crotch. She could feel his erection.

Ramion pushed her away. She fell back against the bed, her oversized breasts popping out of the tight teddy. “I’m not interested,” he said, his jaw clenched.

“You know you don’t mean that. You know you want me to do you. I can lick you till you come.” She stuck her tongue out of her mouth. “You’re getting hard just thinking about my lips on you, sucking you. I’ll do anything you want, anything, baby, if it feels good.” She pressed her body against his, sensually moving her hips. “Umm, you know you want me. No one will know.” She pressed a finger against her lips. “It will be our little secret.”

Ramion grabbed her face and kissed her hard. He fondled her breasts, pressing them together, and then pushed her down on the bed. Glaring at her, he couldn’t believe that she had the nerve to sneak into his house.
I don’t want you,
he thought,
but you’re going to learn to leave me alone.

“Is this what you want, Edwinna?”

“Yes,” she said, reaching up to unzip his pants.

“You want me to fuck you?” he asked, his eyes disguising his disgust.

“Yes, baby, yes!” she muttered, her eyes closed.

He stroked her legs, heating up her body as his hands moved between her thighs. He then abruptly stopped. “Now get out!”