Hidden Mercies (39 page)

“But we are not Swartzentruber.”

“A Swartzentruber no longer owns the property. I do. I also plan to have some plumbing and a refrigerator put in right away.”

“I always liked your father,” Rose said. “He was not as harsh with us when we left the church as some. Caring for him will not be difficult for me—not like waiting on tables. If there is any lifting to do, Henry can help me. He is still very strong.”

“It is a large house. There will be enough bedrooms for your children, and I think my father is going to enjoy having so much life in his house,” he said. “So you’ll do it?”

“I think my Henry will jump at the chance, but I need to ask him before I commit. I will not disobey his headship even if he has made some mistakes.”

“Of course not, but that brings up another question, Rose. Does Henry still take care of the finances in your home? I would hate for him to get into money troubles again.”

Rose lifted her chin. “Henry has given me headship over our family’s finances. He says it will help him to not falter if he does not have access to our money.”

“Do you think he can stay away from the casino?”

“He is a good man, Tobias. He’s been a good father to our children and a good husband to me. He made a prosperous living for us until Satan discovered the one vice that Henry could not fight alone.” She squared her shoulders. “There are no secrets now and he is no longer alone in his battle. He has me beside him.”

“He’s a lucky man to have you. I’m hoping he’ll soon be my brother-in-law and neighbor,” he said. “Do you think Claire will have me?”

“She was distraught when you chose to leave, but she tried to hide it. Now that you’re back, it is like the sun has come out again.”

“Y
ou came to see me!” Amy cried. “I thought you’d never, ever come.”

Rocky propelled himself off the porch at him and nearly knocked him down. “How are you doing, boy?” He ran his fingers through the dog’s white fur. “I missed you, too.”

He swung himself up onto the porch, his hand behind his back. “Well, I’m never going away again. You’ll be sick of seeing me around so much.”

“Never.” She reached her arms up for a hug. “You know I love you—and you can stay forever. What do you have behind your back?”

“A present.”

“For me?”

“Absolutely for you.” He set a blue vase down in front of her with a small, exquisite pink orchid in it. “I thought you might enjoy painting a picture of this.”

“Ooh!” She clapped her hands in glee. “I love it. Do you want me to put a poem with it?”

“I would like that very much.”

“What kind of a poem do you want?”

“How about a love poem.”

“There are all kinds of love poems,” Amy said. “Who do you want to give it to?”

“How about Claire?”

“A love poem for Claire?” she said. “What kind?”

Claire’s buggy was gone, so he knew he was safe in telling Amy his secret.

“How about helping me write a love poem asking her to marry me.”

Amy’s drawing pencil clattered to the table. “Please tell me you are not joking.”

“I am not joking. Do you think she’ll say yes?”

“I don’t know,” Amy said, picking up her pencil again. “But if I have anything to do with it she will!”

•   •   •

Claire came home, preoccupied, from a worrisome birth. It had been touch-and-go for a few minutes. The cord had been wrapped around the child’s throat twice. Her body ached all over from the strain, and she badly needed a shower and a change of clothing.

“Hi!” Amy called. “I’ve made something for you!”

Claire loved Amy with all her heart, but sometimes she wished she could come home and soak in a tub without having to admire yet another of Amy’s creations.

“What do you think?” Amy said, shoving a card beneath Claire’s nose.

It was a lovely picture of an orchid. She wondered if Amy had copied it out of some book. Then she saw the vase sitting on her table.

“Where did that come from?”

“Tom came by and gave it to me,” Amy answered. “Read the card.”

“Tom came by?”

“Just read the card, Claire,” Amy said. “Read it out loud. Slow.”

Claire opened it and began to read.

To Claire

I loved you when we were children

Making daisy chains together in fields,

Playing hide-and-seek in firefly-lit meadows

Listening to your quick laughter.

There was an intake of breath as Claire realized that this poem was not from Amy. There was only one person from whom it could have come.

“Did Tom . . .”

“Shh,” Amy said. “You’re spoiling it, Claire. Just read. Out loud.”

I loved you when you could not see

me for the bright light of my brother.

And later, with every mission

I flew,

In my heart,

I was protecting you.

I loved you when I opened my eyes

In your house—sick—believing

I was seeing an angel.

But it was no angel.

It was you standing there in plain clothes,

A house full of children,

A life that had known grief,

A life that had known great fear—

And you had faced that fear,

And made a life for your family.

I saw you—

No longer a young girl

But a woman who stole my breath

with your beauty and grace.

You touched my ravaged face,

With your healing hands,

And my heart was gone

I knew, in that instant,

A male voice joined with hers for the last line,

that I had never loved you more.

“Tom!” She whirled around. “I didn’t know you where here.”

“Do it like we practiced, Tom,” Amy instructed.

“Who am I to disobey a professional poet?” Tom said. He got down on one knee. “Is this right?” he inquired of Amy.

“Yes, but now you have to take her hand in yours.”

“Like this?”

“And gaze into her eyes.”

He smiled up at Claire. “Like this?”

“That’s good.”

“Now . . .”

“I think I can take it from here, Amy.” Tom stood back up and took both of Claire’s hands in his own. “I have loved you silently for the first forty-four years of my life. Would you do me the honor of marrying me so that I can show my love openly for the next forty-four?”

“Does that mean you are going to stop loving me when we’re eighty-eight?”

“You’re spoiling it again, Claire,” Amy warned.

“Are you saying that you’re willing to put up with my strange hours, and my pager going off in the middle of the night?”

“I am so proud of what you do, Claire,” he said. “I’ll never stand in your way and I’ll help you in any way I can.”

“This is a noisy, busy family for a bachelor to move into, Tom. Daniel does not yet always sleep through the night. Albert has recently taken up the harmonica. Jesse got his hands on some firecrackers last week and scared us to death.
Maddy goes around singing praise songs most of the time.”

“I can handle it.”

“Maybe, but it doesn’t stop there. Elizabeth is still living in Levi’s apartment and she likes to drop in for coffee every morning.”

“I don’t have a problem with that.”

“At four o’clock in the morning. If I’m not awake, she’ll make it herself.”

“That could be a problem. What about Grace and Levi? Are they doing any better?”

“A little. They’ve found a church. The minister and his wife have a background similar to theirs. They’ve been getting together and talking. It seems to be helping. All I know is that my son and daughter-in-law aren’t nearly as loud as they used to be. I’m warning you, though. Things could still blow up over there again.”

“I’ve survived mortar attacks, Claire,” Tom said. “I’ve survived suicide bombers. Surely I can survive any noise your family can make.”

“If we marry, it won’t be ‘my’ family, it will be ‘ours.’ Are you willing to take on that sort of responsibility, Tom?”

“Come over here and sit down on the swing with me,” he said. “Amy, would you mind going into the house for a bit?”

“Well . . .” Amy looked from one to the other. “I guess my work here is done . . . for now.”

She left, and he and Claire seated themselves on the swing.

“You are concerned about whether or not I’m willing to take on the responsibilities of a family,” he said. “You need to know that I already have begun to do so.”

“What do you mean?”

“How would you like to have Rose as a neighbor?” he said.

“I would love it. Why do you ask?”

“I’ve asked her and Henry to live in and work my father’s
farm in return for help caring for him. I’ll move
Daed
into Grandpa’s old
Daadi Haus,
but as you know, it connects directly through the kitchen. Rose will be able to care for him, and I plan to help her with him a great deal.”

“She and Henry agreed?” she asked.

“You should have seen Rose’s eyes light up when I talked to her about it. She wants a chance to talk to Henry first, but I’ll be surprised if they don’t jump at it. It’s a good deal, for everyone. Including my father.”

“Thank you, Tom,” she said with a break in her voice. “That is one of the most generous things I’ve ever heard of—with the exception of you buying the farm from your sister and brother-in-law in the first place.

“But . . . I just want to make absolutely sure I’m clear on something—you know we cannot marry unless you become Old Order Amish.”

“That kind of goes without saying, doesn’t it, Claire? Of course I know that. I intend to go see Bishop Schrock this week.”

“You do realize that means you’ll have to give up your flying, right? Are you sure you can do that? You have spent a lifetime honing that skill and you love it so.”

“I’ll miss it,” Tom said. “I’ll miss it greatly, but some things are worth sacrificing for. Flying will not get me to heaven. Flying will not keep me warm at night. Flying is exhilarating, but it does not feed my soul. And flying will keep me from having you.

“There’s one other thing we need to discuss. Until Saturday, I was a wealthy man. Now, not so much. I’ll need to get a job to supplement my retirement pay.”

“What do you have in mind?” she asked.

“There is a flight training school a couple hours from here. I’ve already called. Once they learned about my credentials, they jumped at the chance for me to teach the basics. I won’t be flying, but I can teach others some of what I know. I’ll only
be going there two days a week, but I’ll be teaching back-to-back classes on those days.”

“Do you think your students will be ready for an Amish teacher? They might not take you seriously.”

“They’ll take me seriously. Remember, I’m an Amish teacher who once flew the president. If they’re smart, they’ll listen to me. The pay isn’t bad. I’ll be able to help support you and the children.”

“You do realize I haven’t said yes yet,” Claire said. “Right?”

He waved a dismissive hand. “A technicality,” he said. “What woman could resist a love poem written by Amy and me?”

“Not me. I was ready to marry you after the first line.” She laughed. “Tom, I knew I was in love with you the night I saw you go in after Maddy even though you were barely strong enough to climb those stairs.”

“So it’s a yes, then?” he asked.

“Well, I hate to disappoint Amy.”

He heard a sound behind them, and they turned to see several pairs of eyes and noses pressed against the window.

“I think we’re their entertainment for tonight,” she said.

“Then let’s give them something entertaining.” He tipped her face up for a kiss.

The moment their lips touched, they heard a discordant “eww” from Albert and Jesse, and a romantic sigh from Amy and Sarah. Daniel pounded on the window with his hand and started to cry for his mother.

“And so it begins,” Claire said. “You can back out now and I won’t hold it against you.”

Tom laughed with the sheer joy of a man who can hardly believe his dreams are coming true. “Claire, I have been waiting for this my whole life.”

A Howard Reading Group Guide

Hidden Mercies

Serena B. Miller

When Tom Miller returns to his hometown of Mt. Hope, Ohio, after a twenty-seven-year absence, he discovers that nothing—and everything—has changed. He is still in love with Claire Shetler, his dead brother Matthew’s widow, and still estranged from his father because of his part in the accident that led to Matthew’s death. But Tom—formerly Tobias Troyer—is able to join the life of the town without revealing his identity because of war wounds he suffered during one of his tours as a Marine in Afghanistan. Tom rents a room from Claire and slowly becomes an integral part of her family life. As Claire and Tom begin to fall in love, Tom learns the true definition of homecoming and what it means to receive God’s unconditional love.