Highland Knight (23 page)

“Such nonsense. Why cannae ye think of all we can share, of all we can do together and build together? There can be some good found in this marriage.”

“Such as?”

“Weel, we shall be lovers. There could be such passion between us,” she said quietly, her voice low and husky.

“Nay.”

Katherine’s laugh held a hint of uncertainty. “Nay? We will be married. Of course ye will come to my bed.”

“Nay, I willnae. E’en if I was knotted up with an ache for a woman, I wouldnae touch you, certainly not until ye have that bairn.”

“Oh? Do ye think the bairn willnae look like you?”

“Since I didnae father it, ’tis possible.”

“And how would ye gain by not bedding me? Ye cannae claim that I am still a virgin. ’Twould be your word against mine as to who took my maidenhead and when, and e’en to whatever claims ye may try to make about the marriage being unconsummated. And we will have been seen at court as mon and wife, mayhap e’en at the French court, for I heard ye must soon travel there.”

“Did ye? Ye must have taken some time to learn about me then, for that wasnae weel kenned about the court,” he said. “I am flattered. But why should ye think ye would be traveling to court with me?”

“I will be your wife.”

“And mine to do with as I please. It doesnae please me to drag ye around with me.”

There ensued a silence so heavy, Cameron could almost feel it weighing him down. He could see what Payton was doing and had to respect the cleverness of the plan. Unfortunately, Katherine was revealing all too clearly that it was neither love nor a deep,
abiding passion that made her want Sir Payton as a husband. She wanted his body, his prestige, and his purse. She wanted to flit from court to court, basking in his honors and in the envy of other women. And deep in his heart, Cameron knew there would be even uglier truths revealed, for as Payton denied her every prize she craved, she grew angrier. And when Katherine got angry, she lashed out. That much Cameron had learned about her. Katherine would try to hurt Payton, and if what Cameron began to suspect was true, one way to hurt him now was with the truth—to show him just how thoroughly he had been entrapped and would be made to look the fool.

“Ye must take me with you,” she said finally, her voice trembling with rage. “I will be your wife. Just where am I to go whilst ye travel from court to court?”

“Weel, ye could stay here with your brother. There is also my family at Donneoill.”

“Ye cannae do that.”

“I can do anything I wish to,” Payton said, his voice hard and cold. “Ye will be wife, my chattel. At least until the bairn comes and then I believe I will be able to cast you aside.”

“Oh, nay, ye willnae.”

“The bairn isnae mine.”

“’Twill look enough like me or enough like ye to make your claims of not fathering it little more than a matter of jests.”

“Aye, I think ye did indeed plan this all verra weel,” Payton said. “Ye found yourself a lover with red hair and brown eyes. I have seen the lad, and we could be kin. And he proved conveniently potent, too, didnae he? Ye have made one serious mistake, however, Katherine.”

“Nay,
ye
have. Ye should ne’er have scorned me, Payton. Now ye willnae be able to, for I will be your wife. And if ye think ye can just tuck me out of sight, ye had best think again. My brother willnae let ye shame me so.”

“Ere the bairn is born or soon thereafter, your brother will ken that ye shame yourself, that ye have done naught but lie to him and use him. Aye, spurred on by your own ruthless selfishness, ye have used all of us.”

“I dinnae ken why ye keep saying this bairn will prove anything. ’Twill have black hair or red hair, blue eyes or brown. ’Twill look like my family or one of that vast horde ye call kin.”

“Aye, Malcolm Saunders does have red hair and brown eyes. He also has a large birthmark on his buttocks.”

“Nay, he doesnae.”

“Aye, and ye should ken the truth of that better than anyone, but I fear ye must have failed to notice a thing or two about your lover. Mayhap ye didnae rut with him except in the dark, or ne’er took the time to look o’er that fine body ye were using. Ah, but he was just a poor squire. Ye ne’er intended to stay with the lad, just use him for your pleasure. He was but part of a plan.”

“Malcolm doesnae have a mark,” Katherine nearly shouted. “How could ye ken such a thing, anyway?”

“My squire saw him when they were swimming once. Gil swore it looked just like Sterling castle. Near covers his left buttock. Mayhap your gaze was elsewhere, your interest more in his
stature
. I have heard ’tis most impressive.”

“Your Gil sees and hears the oddest things—for a mon, leastwise.”

“Oh, most everyone at court has heard a wee whisper about how weel endowed young Malcolm is. Is he?”

“Jealous? I have heard that ye may equal him.”

“Not that ye will e’er ken the truth of that. I willnae crawl atween your legs ere the bairn is born, and once it is, I will have the proof I need to pull your greedy talons out of my hide.”

“Curse ye, the bairn may not carry this mark. If there e’en is one. I think ye lie, try to trick me.”

“Nay. Believe it or nay. Katherine, but oftimes the truth works as weel, if nay better, than lies and deceits. The mark proclaiming your lies for all to see will be there. It appears on the firstborn Saunders without fail.”

“Malcolm is a seventh son,” Katherine proclaimed, relief and triumph sounding in her voice.

“True enough, except that he is also the firstborn of his father’s third wife.”

Cameron leaned forward and buried his face in his hands. His sister had lied to him, used him. She had used them all. There was even the strong possibility she had plotted this entrapment of Sir Payton from the first moment he had rebuffed her. Cameron had begun to believe that Katherine was lying, but he never would have guessed the game was this complicated or this sordid. And for the sake of this selfish, scheming, spoiled child, he had sent away the woman he loved.

And there was that truth he had struggled against, he realized, nearly groaning aloud. While he had sat caught up in the revelation of Katherine’s perfidy, the truth had stepped forward from the dark edges of his mind. It would not be denied any longer, and he had been right to fear it. It was utterly devastating. He loved Avery, loved her with a depth and intensity that was frightening. And for the sake of a spoiled child, he had thrown Avery away—sent from his side the only woman he would ever love. He stood up and walked out of hiding.

“It doesnae matter,” Katherine said. “My brother will take my word o’er yours. He willnae let ye cast me aside.”

“Oh, aye, he will,” Cameron said as he stepped up beside Payton and looked at Katherine, pleased to see that she had the sense to look wary of him. “At this moment, I am but one more revelation from casting ye aside myself.” Out of the corner of his eyes he saw Leargan approach them.

“He tricks me, Cameron, tricks me into saying things that arenae true,” Katherine protested. She took a step back when she clearly saw the fury Cameron felt. “’Tis nay as it sounds.”

“Shut up. Oh, I had my doubts, have e’en caught ye in a lie or two, but I kept trying to believe ye at least had some feelings for the lad here. E’en that ye may have been lovers, briefly, though as I have come to ken Sir Payton, that was a lie it grew e’er more difficult to believe. Yet, nay once in all the little explanations I gave myself, all the possibilities I envisioned, did I come near the truth. Ye see, I still stumbled o’er the foolish notion that there was some feeling in ye, some heart. There is none at all, is there, lass?”

“Cameron, ye must let me explain.”

“Explain what? That ye dinnae care who ye hurt, whose life ye destroy, so long as
ye get what ye want? Sweet Mary, ye started all of this by accusing the lad of rape. That could easily have gotten him killed. When I realized that was a lie, I should have put an end to all of this right then.” He took a deep breath to calm himself. “Ye will get yourself from my sight and stay out of my sight until I can get young Malcolm Saunders to Cairnmoor to marry ye.”

“But he is nothing—naught but a squire, landless and poor!”

“He willnae be so poor once he has your dower, will he? Go, Katherine, and quickly.” He breathed a sigh of relief when she obeyed him, for he had begun to fear he would give into the overwhelming urge to strike her. “The two of ye have been plotting toward this end all week, havenae ye?” he asked as he looked at Payton and Leargan.

“Aye,” replied Payton when Leargan just shrugged. “Avery and Gillyanne had unearthed a few clues to the truth ere they left here. I unearthed a few more. But to be honest, Malcolm Saunders was the result of a guess. A weel-founded guess, but still, just a guess.”

“Jesu.” Cameron shook his head. “And there is no birthmark shaped like Sterling Castle, either, I should wager.”

“Nay. From what Gil once said, if there is one, ye would nay be able to see it beneath the pelt of bright-red hair.”

Cameron knew that, if he was not so sick at heart, he would probably laugh. “But weel-endowed.”

“Hung like a stallion, so rumor has it.”

“Ah, weel, ye are free now. And Leargan, ye will go and find this stallion of a squire and get him back here to marry Katherine. Considering her beauty, the richness of her dower in land and coin, I dinnae think he will give ye too much trouble.”

“Cameron, we need to talk,” said Payton as Cameron started to walk away.

“About what?” Cameron paused and frowned back at the younger man.

“Avery.”

Drawing his breath in so sharply he nearly choked, Cameron shook his head. “I think I have born all I can endure this day,” he said quietly, and he strode away, intending to drink himself into oblivion. It might be only a temporary cure for the pain he felt, but at the moment, he needed it.

“Poor sod,” Leargan murmured. “This had to be a gut-wrenching revelation.”

“Aye,” agreed Payton. “Worse, I think he had more than the one about Katherine’s perfidy.”

“How do ye ken that? Are ye another one like Gillyanne?”

“Och, nay. I just think the cut was deeper than it should have been since he had already guessed or suspected a lot of what dear Katherine revealed tonight. Cameron looked mortally wounded. Weel, let us go prepare to fetch the bridegroom.”

“Ye are coming with me, are ye?” Leargan fell into step beside Payton as they strolled back to the keep.

“Aye. I think your laird is going to get drunk and stay that way for a wee while. And until dear Katherine is wed and gone, I am nay sure he will heed any talk of Avery.”

“Ye think he will listen to ye afterward?”

“Aye, e’en if I have to tie him in that chair he is so troubled over.” Payton laughed along with Leargan.

Lifting his head very carefully from his hands, Cameron warily eyed the potion someone had just set down in front of him. He could not believe he had immersed himself so deeply in self-pity and wine, but four days of that had certainly left its mark. Glancing around the great hall, he realized that not only was Katherine’s marriage completed, but the wedding feast had ended as well. The only ones left were his rather pathetic self, Leargan, and Payton. It was Payton who offered the potion, but both men looked sympathetic. It was that, something a little too close to pity for Cameron’s liking, that gave him the strength to pick up the potion and drink it down.

“Jesu.” Cameron shuddered and then drank down the watery cider Payton gave him. “Why cannae a cure taste good?”

“I have oft wondered the same thing,” Payton said as he sat down next to Cameron and set a plate of thickly sliced bread in front of him. “Eat. ’Twill soak up the poisons and help the potion do its work.”

“What are ye still doing here?” Cameron asked as he slowly began to eat the bread.

“I had to be sure Katherine was wed and myself out of danger.”

“Weel, she is, and ye are, so ye can leave now. Leargan can see to sending a mon or two with ye so ye can get back to Donncoill hale and happy. Two strong men to fight off the lasses and clear ye a path home.”

“Such a sweet-tempered, thoughtful host,” Payton murmured, fighting a grin. “But I am nay ready to leave yet.”

“Katherine isnae still here, is she?” Cameron asked, wondering if Payton was only waiting to see the whole disaster through to the very end.

“Nay,” replied Leargan, smiling faintly when Cameron slumped in his chair with obvious relief. “She left a few hours ago, whining about being banished to such a remote property with naught but a lowly squire for a husband. So ye can cease soaking yourself in wine to keep from throttling her.”

Since that had been some of the reason for his plunge into drunken oblivion, Cameron did not argue with Leargan’s words. “Did I e’er meet young Malcolm the stallion?”

“Aye. Once your head clears a bit ye will probably recall it. He is a fine lad, good-natured and polite, yet I think Katherine will soon discover that he is also clever enough to see her for what she is and strong-willed enough to curb her ways. Dinnae frown. I doubt he will beat her or the like. And he was most pleased with it all. He has risen from being a lowly squire with little hope of land or gain to a knight with both, plus a bonny wife and a child on the way.”

“When did he become a knight?”

“On our way to the court to collect Malcolm, we paused to tell his father about his son’s good fortune,” replied Payton. “This news decided Sir Saunders to bestir himself to get his bairn of three and twenty years a knighthood. Malcolm had earned it,” Payton assured him, “but the laird he was squire to hates to train new lads and so denies the knighthood until complaints grow too loud. Sir Saunders was verra loud so Malcolm arrived at his wedding as Sir Malcolm, but he believes he may wait a while ere he tells his new wife the good news.”

Cameron smiled. “The lad may just have what is needed to control my sister.”

“And he will have the help of his Nana, a big, strong-willed woman who adores
him, and his Aunt Grizel, who is much the same. Aye, her and her four daughters.”

“And one of his brothers, his wife, and her sister,” added Leargan.

“Jesu, can the demesne I gave them hold that many?” asked Cameron.

“Aye,” replied Leargan. “Katherine complained that she wouldnae have her own bedchamber with so many of Malcolm’s kin coming to share in the bounty she was giving him. Malcolm told her that her brother was the giver of that bounty and why would she need her own bedchamber when she had his magnificent furry self to curl up with every night?”

Cameron was surprised he could do so, but he laughed. “I am almost sorry I missed all of this.”

“I really dinnae think ye missed as much as ye think. Ye were drunk, but nay that drunk, and ye held up weel. ’Twas understood that ye drank heavily to stay your hand from the lass’s backside. Malcolm said ’twas sometimes the only thing a mon could do. His Nana said she wouldnae be quite so constrained and would see that the fine, generous Laird Cameron wasnee troubled by the lass again.”

“And,” continued Payton, “that the lass will learn how to be a good wife to Nana’s dear lad. ’Twill be a while ere one can see if Katherine has the wit to change, but if she does, Malcolm will be all the mon she needs. The kin who are sharing in this bounty will certainly be working to bring her to her senses. It seems ye were lucky she chose to use him, for ye will have a good mon holding that land, an ally ye can count on. Him and his whole family. They ken weel that ye could have forced the lad to wed Katherine and tossed them both out without a farthing. They ne’er expected such gifts, and ’tis how they see them—as gifts.”

“I didnae want Katherine here, but I couldnae toss her out with naught,” Cameron said quietly.

“And she will be taken good care of though she might think she suffers. She will soon learn the difference between what she thinks is necessary and what truly is. And Malcolm is now a knight and laird of a small holding, with his brother his right hand. Sir Saunders, a poor laird, has seen two of his younger sons gain far more than he could e’er give them or hope they could earn. So all is settled and most all are verra happy. Save
ye
. Save my sister. And, now, we will talk about that.”

Cameron looked at Payton and reminded himself that the man was eight years younger than him. It did not dim the force of Payton’s words or expression. He wanted to tell Payton sharply that what had happened between him and Avery was none of his concern, but he knew that was a lie. Avery was Payton’s sister, his blood kin. Payton was also a young man he had wronged, one whose life he had nearly ruined. He was going to have to endure a discussion about Avery and try to hide how badly it would tear him apart.

“There really isnae anything to talk about,” Cameron said in a faint last-ditch attempt to stop the discussion that would stir up all the feelings deadened by too much drink and, now, by the sickness such excess brought on.

“E’en if my sister hadnae told me there was something, near everyone else at Cairnmoor would have. I fear your sister was most anxious to tell all. ’Tis a good thing Avery spoke to me first.” Payton looked at Cameron, one brow quirked upward. “Some brothers might feel inclined to do ye some harm. I have no doubt my father would be most pleased to tear ye into wee pieces—slowly. There is a verra good chance
Maman
would help.”

“I am still alive, however,” Cameron murmured. “Since your father isnae trying to kick down my gates to kill me, I must assume Avery has said naught.”

“She wouldnae. So, do ye want my sister?”

The blunt question startled Cameron into answering honestly. “Aye. It matters not. I sent her away with nary a word,” he said softly. “And I acted upon a lie. I should have—”

“Nay,” Payton said, holding up a hand to stop his words. “I am nay the one ye need to talk to about what ye should have done or said. She is.” He leaned closer to Cameron. “Do ye wish to marry Avery?”

“Aye.”

Cameron was surprised by the speed of his reply. He had stoutly declared he did not want a wife from the moment he had discovered his betrothed’s treachery. There had not been a woman since who had made him even consider changing his mind. Not until Avery.

He had tried to banish her from his mind and heart from the moment he had sent her away, and he had failed utterly. For one week he had sought to convince himself that all they had shared was passion, that he was simply regretting the fact that their affair had ended before the passion had faded. That pretense had been shattered the night in the garden when he had learned all too well what his sister’s treachery had cost him. All the misery he had suffered since Avery had left was suddenly explained, but what had sent him plunging into one of the darkest moods he had ever suffered was the thought that he could do nothing about it. Now her own brother was offering her to him. He would be an utter fool not to accept that offer.

“One last question,” Payton said very quietly. “Do ye love her?”

Staring into his goblet of cider, Cameron decided he owed the man at least one more moment of complete honesty. “Aye,” he whispered.

“Good.” Payton sat back in his chair. “Now, here is my plan.”

“Ye are brooding.”

Avery turned from the window she had been staring blindly out of to smile crookedly at her cousin Elspeth. They had come to the well-lit tower room to work on their tapestries. Elspeth worked peacefully while Avery had stared blindly at needle and wool, then had come to the window to do more of the same. As she studied her beautiful cousin, Avery could not stop herself from wondering it Cameron would have fought to keep her if she had possessed some of Elspeth’s beauty.

“Avery, have I done something to upset you?” Elspeth asked.

It could be irritating to have people in one’s family who so easily guessed one’s moods, feelings, or thoughts, Avery decided. “Nay,” Avery said firmly as she sat down on a padded bench beneath the high-arched window. “I was just thinking of how bonny ye are with that black hair and those big green eyes. Wheesht, ye look more like my mother than I e’er have.” She grimaced. “I was just feeling a wee bit envious, in truth. A beautiful brother, beautiful cousins, and I.”

“Ye are beautiful,” Elspeth said. “Aye, ye arenae the sort of beauty poets and minstrels warble about. Neither am I. Mayhap ye dinnae like the color of your hair, but try thinking instead that ’tis thick, soft, and verra long. Mayhap ye are thinking yourself
too thin. Think instead that, whilst some fool men might ogle full breasts and rounded hips, ye are strong, healthy, and verra, verra graceful. Your skin is clear, soft, and sparks with good health and warmth!”

“And I have good teeth.”

Elspeth laughed. “Aye, ye do. Avery, there are verra few of us who can equal those fair ones in poem and song. Have ye seen many men who do? Nay.”

“Weel, Payton, your Cormac, and uncle Eric come close to what is said to be monly perfection.”

“Too much red in their hair, though it ne’er stopped the lasses from slavering o’er them. Cormac told me that the first thing about me that truly grabbed hold of his attention was my voice.” She shrugged and nodded at Avery’s look of surprise. “Then my mouth. He told me other things, but though I am pleased beyond words that he likes them, I am nay sure they are flattering. Not all of them. The mon claims to like the way my hair always looks a bit untidy no matter what I do. And, he thinks I have adorable feet.” She laughed along with Avery but quickly grew serious again. “The mon wouldnae have bedded ye if he didnae find ye bonny. Dinnae look so wary, Avery, ’tis nay so verra obvious.”

“Then how did ye ken it?”

“Something in the way ye brood. It holds the longing of a lass who misses far more than a bonny face. Has your mither guessed?”

“I think so. She does try to…weel, talk to me and studies me a wee bit too closely. ’Tis why I thought to go to visit ye. Told her ye might wish to learn what I ken about Alan’s father. Then ye arrive here to visit whilst Corniac is at court.”

“Sorry.” Elspeth took a deep breath and asked softly, “He will be good to my Alan, will he not?”

“Oh, aye. I think he has shown that already, dimiae ye? He has every right to just take the boy.”

“True. He has agreed to take it slowly, which shows concern for wee Alan’s feelings. ’Twill also help me let go, though I am thinking the boy will always hold a large place in my heart. And, is there nay a chance ye will be the lady of Cairnmoor?”

“I dinnae ken.”

“Yet Sir Cameron bedded ye.”

Avery leaned back against the cool stone wall. As succinctly as she could, she told Elspeth all about her time with Cameron. She told her how it had begun as a plan of revenge and how she felt it had changed. She also told her of Cameron’s mistrust of women and why he clung to it. Then she waited as Elspeth thought over all she had just learned.

“My, three years of celibacy,” Elspeth finally murmured and shook her head.

“Which could be explanation enough for his desire.”

“Nay. A simple rut or two would take care of that. From what ye say, ’twas more than simple rutting he indulged in with ye.”

“I like to think so. It certainly was on my part. And once, when I called it rutting, he got verra angry. Commanded me to ne’er call what passes between us rutting.”

“Ah, Avery, there are the words to hang your hopes on.”

“Do ye really think so?” Avery had thought them important, but she was wary of trusting in her own feelings and conclusions.

“I do and I think ye do, too. Ye are just afraid to believe in your own opinions. A mon who doesnae feel much more than desire for a lass isnae going to care what she calls their lovemaking. If ye said it whilst angry, he might murmur a few sweet denials and soothing flatteries. He doesnae get furious and command ye like that.”

“Yet he sent me away.” Avery inwardly grimaced over the hint of a childish whine in her voice.

“He had to. Ye ken it. ’Tis just one of those things it is easier to grab hold of when one wants to feel sorry for oneself. ’Tis the getting ye back which could prove difficult. It will certainly look like a greater problem to him than it will to you,” Elspeth murmured as she tapped her fingers against her chin.

“How much bigger can it get?” grumbled Avery. “He made Payton the ransom for me and Gilly and will make poor Payton marry that wretched, lying sister of his. Poor Payton may already have been plunged into that purgatory.”

Elspeth grinned. “Very dramatic.”

“Thank ye.”

“Now, ye said Cameron had changed from thinking Payton capable of rape all the way to saying the marriage wouldnae take place for a week or two. He is giving Payton time to prove Katherine is lying and trying to trick them all to get what she wants.”

“So why doesnae Cameron prove it himself if he already has doubts?” Avery snapped.

“Ye ken the why of that, too,” Elspeth scolded, but her tone was one of gentle sympathy. “Ye would find it hard to believe any of us would act so dishonorably. Ye would fight believing it just as hard as he is fighting the truth about his sister. Aye, right up until ye heard the confession of it all.”