His Holiday Heart (2 page)

“I’ll be right there.” He sounded so grim, he could have been accepting an appointment for five consecutive root canals. The line clicked off abruptly.

Her teeth were clacking together again, so she clenched her jaw. The wind cut through her layers of clothing, past her skin and went right into the hollow of her bones. Yikes, she was cold. But headlights flared to life at the back of the row of stores and swept around snowdrifts and parking curbs in her direction.

She was too cold to brace herself, as she always had to whenever she was in the vicinity of Mr. McKaslin. She had a short and unpleasant history with him—the unpleasant outweighed the short. When she’d moved from Portland to Bozeman, she joined a reader’s group to get to know some people and because she loved reading. She had made many friends, Katherine McKaslin Munroe, who’d been the assistant manager but who was now on leave, her sisters Danielle, Ava, Aubrey, Lauren and Rebecca. She had heard about the Gray Stone Church from Katherine, joined and made a new circle of friends. But every time she stepped foot inside the bookstore or spotted him in church, Spence scowled at her, turned his back and acted as if she did not exist.

The ride home ought to be interesting. She wondered if he would even say two words to her. She lived a long way from town. Did she really want to be in Spence’s presence the entire way?

His huge green truck skidded to a halt beside her. The door swung open. The dome light shone down on the big man, looking bigger in his thick winter coat, and seemed to emphasize his frown. He did not seem happy to see her.

He wasn’t going to be happy when he found out where she lived. Maybe having him drive out all that way was too much. She could always stay in a downtown hotel. She stepped up into the truck not too clumsily, considering how she was nearly frozen solid. She collapsed on the seat and pulled the door shut, sprinkling large chunks of snow all over the pristine interior. “Sorry,” she said.

He stared at her without acknowledging her apology. He would be totally handsome if he stopped scowling. He had wide set dark-blue eyes that would put a movie star to shame, high granite cheekbones and a straight blade of a nose. A mouth that might be bracketed by dimples, if he ever actually smiled. He had one of those strong square jaws that spoke of integrity and manliness.

“Where can I take you?” he asked in a baritone devoid of warmth or friendliness.

She felt colder in his truck with the heat blasting almost lukewarm than she’d felt outside in the minus degree windchill. Why did she want things to be different between her and Spence? She never could explain her feelings, why she felt sad whenever he behaved this way toward her. He wasn’t the kind of man she even liked.

But he was a decent man. He was helping her when she really needed help. “Let’s head toward the university.”

“Sure.” He put the truck in gear. “I know you’re cold, but put on your seat belt.”

That almost didn’t come out sounding like an order. Wow, this was going so much better than she expected. If only she wasn’t board-stiff in the seat, she would be able to get the seat belt around the fluff of her inches thick coat.

Take a deep breath, Lucy, she instructed herself. Maybe the problem with Spence McKaslin was that he had always been a total stranger. So what if he had taken care to keep things this way. Maybe this was a God-given opportunity. Maybe her car was snowplowed under several feet of snow for a higher purpose.

She dropped her bag on the floor, latched the buckle and attempted to relax against the seat. The windows were fogged up and before Spence would drive an inch, he switched the heater to defrost and pulled a folded towel from beneath the seat to wipe the glass.

The way Spence leered at her out of the corner of his eye made her feel like a slacker.

“If I reach under my seat, will I find a nifty towel, too?” She asked, wanting to help out.

“No.”

That made her wonder what he kept under the passenger seat. Something sensible, she figured, because this was Spence McKaslin—the man who she’d seen crack a smile once, but it had been short-lived and she had been way across the room from him. Definitely something practical, she decided. Probably an emergency tool kit or a first aid kit. It was unlike the mess of books she had beneath hers, which had slipped beneath the seat one by one after she’d left each of them on the floor.

“Here. If you don’t mind.” He folded the towel over to a dry side and handed it to her.

Talk about scintillating conversation. For once couldn’t a handsome man—even a scowling, bad-tempered handsome man—look at her and say, “You look lovely, Lucy, even with a frozen nose and your eyelashes iced together”?

She took the towel from him. “Sure, I’d be happy to.”

He grunted, nodded once and put the truck in gear. The vehicle rolled forward, and he expertly managed a huge slick of solid ice and turned onto the main road.

He remained silent as she wiped at the foggy glass. He didn’t say, “This is great. We’ve never really had the chance to get to know one another, so let’s do that now. How about a romantic dinner? Maybe some hot tea afterward in front of a roaring fireplace, and we can talk for hours.”

No, he didn’t say anything like that. He stared straight ahead as if he were pretending she wasn’t seated right beside him. He didn’t even sneak a look at her. She knew, because she was watching him. It was as if she didn’t exist to him at all.

Bummer. She wished she could explain what it was about Spence that made her want to like him. It was just her romantic heart, she thought as she folded the towel a final time. The window was clear so she set the towel next to her bag instead of on the leather upholstery. She was a writer for a reason, mostly because this was her life—dull, staid and quiet. If she didn’t have an imagination to spice it up, she’d be lethally bored.

But not even her imagination was strong enough to figure out how to turn Spence’s silence into polite conversation.

So she contented herself with watching the windshield wipers swipe from side to side and the huge snowflakes evading them.

S
pence squinted through the snow on the window and couldn’t believe his eyes. “This can’t be right. You don’t live in a hotel, do you?”

“No, but I live way out on Blackhawk Hill, and that’s too far to ask you to drive.”

“You should have asked me,” he said. The shields were up around his heart, so he was certain he was immune to her incredible loveliness. Even with her hair wet from the snow and straggling against the sides of her face, she was breathtaking. Not that he wanted her to know that’s what he thought. “I’m not leaving you here. I said I’d take you home, and I meant it.”

“Did you hear the road report? Half the county roads are closed down. I should have left sooner, but I promised Danielle I would get those signed before your Thanksgiving week sale, and it’s been one of those days. It’s my fault, so you shouldn’t be punished for offering to take me home.”

That was a woman’s logic for you. Spence scowled harder. He respected women and he liked them, but as the older brother of six sisters, he’d learned girls were a puzzle—and not logical in the slightest. “I’m taking you home where I know you’re safe.”

“Really? And here I thought you would be in a hurry to get rid of me.” She said it with a smile, with understanding, as if she thought she knew why he always kept his distance.

She knew nothing. Nothing at all. All it took was one glance into her unguarded green eyes and his Adam’s apple stuck in his throat and wouldn’t budge. Emeralds would be considered dull and worthless when compared to that deep, stunning green. He couldn’t speak. He couldn’t swallow. He was lucky to breathe, which meant he was staring at her like a fool as she gave a little shoulder shrug.

“Spence, I’m not going to let you drive on unplowed roads the state patrol is about ready to close down anyway. I’ll be fine here. Look, there’s a vacancy sign. It’s a nice place.”

He tore his gaze from hers and stared at the stately hotel sign. Any second now the effects of Lucy would wear off and he would be able to speak again like a normal man. “What if the power goes off?”

“They probably have a generator.”

“What about dinner? Have you had dinner?”

“Uh, no. There’s a restaurant next door, oh, that’s closed. No surprise there. Don’t worry. I’m sure there’s room service in a place like this.” Kindly, she laid her gloved fingertips on his forearm. “Thanks for your concern, but I’ll be fine. You can leave with a clear conscience. Really.”

“Maybe I don’t want a clear conscience.” Even through the layers of down of his sleeve, he could feel the weight of her fingertips, the impact of her touch. It was like a mortar blast against the shields of his heart.

Wasn’t that just his luck? She was the only woman who had ever made a dent in his defenses. A smart man would trust a grown woman to take care of herself, drop her off and drive away. But he’d never been a smart man. Doing the right thing wasn’t always smart. He didn’t like the idea of Lucy being alone in a hotel room when a blizzard hit the city. Sometimes electricity and services were running by the next day. Sometimes it took much longer. She didn’t even have a change of clothes with her.

“Wait.” He reached to turn on the radio and scanned for a road report. He found one of the local stations and listened. They were in the middle of listing all the county road closures. He thought of his brother-in-law, Jack, who would probably be called out on patrol tonight. The storm had come in fast, to everyone’s surprise.

He could feel Lucy’s gaze on him. His palms broke out in a sweat. There was that panic again, settling in because she was too close. Only the console separated them, but it wasn’t only physical distance. He’d stopped barking at her and started caring, and he wasn’t even sure when he’d allowed that to happen.

Maybe it was inevitable. He’d been watching Lucy from afar for a long, long time.

“I have three options,” he told her, down to business and determined to stay there. That way he didn’t have to notice how honest her eyes were. “One, we call my brother-in-law with the state patrol.”

“Katherine’s husband, Jack?”

“Yep. If he’s not out on an emergency, he can probably take you home.”

“I’d hate to trouble him. Someone might need him more than I do.”

Sincerity. It made her seem flawless and even more beautiful. He swallowed hard, wiped his palms on his knees and stared at the hotel’s sign again. “Option two: we take you over to stay with Rebecca. She’s in a two-bedroom condo with a spare guest room. She’s not far from here, and I’m sure she’ll be glad to have you.”

“Then I’m inconveniencing her.”

“Lucy, you’ll be inconveniencing me worse if you stay here. Hotels are fine, but tomorrow is Thanksgiving. What about your family? Here’s your third option: I take you home. I’ve got four-wheel drive, and I’m not scared of a little snow.”

“So I see. Actually, I’m surprised snow doesn’t melt at your command.”

“Actually, me too.”

“Spence, I can’t believe this. You’re actually almost smiling.”

“I’ve been known to smile.”

“Not that I’ve ever seen. Sure, in theory of course you are capable of smiling, but not even I could imagine it.” Were they having a moment together, Lucy wondered. Were they really getting along? “I’m guessing that you even have dimples.”

“Shh, don’t go around saying things like that. A man like me can’t have dimples. That will ruin my reputation.”

“Oh, so that’s the secret to Spence McKaslin. The growling personality is all for the sake of your reputation.” Lucy rolled her eyes. Men. “Don’t worry. Your secret is safe with me.”

“Thanks. I appreciate that. Word like that gets out and I’ll lose all respect.”

“I don’t think you have to worry about that.” Lucy felt a little flip-flop of her heart, and that surprised her. Okay, maybe it was because she’d never seen this side of Spence before, but what she
did
know about him certainly made him a man to admire. He was devout and devoted to his family. He was active in his church and did extensive volunteer work. That meant he
couldn’t
be a bad guy, right?

He hauled his cell phone from his coat pocket and punched a number. “I’ll check with Rebecca first. Do you have family here in town that can pick you up tomorrow?”

Now was the moment of truth. “I don’t have family in town.”

“Oh, they’re flying in?”

It was an assumption she should correct, but when she opened her mouth, she hesitated. Saying the words “No I’ll be alone for the holiday” was hard. She had to gather up her gumption and just as she was opening her mouth to correct his misimpression, Rebecca must have answered her phone, because Spence started talking. Lucy could personally come up with a thousand excuses why Rebecca—she knew her from church and the bookstore, of course—wouldn’t want to have her privacy invaded, but Spence snapped off the phone.

“It’s settled.” He didn’t look at her as he put the truck in gear. “Rebecca is more than happy to have you. She got so excited I couldn’t get a word in edgewise. If you have no objections, I’ll take you there.”

She thought of how difficult and dangerous the county roads were and then of Spence fighting them back to town. She looked up at the hotel, very nice but so impersonal—so lonely. “My cat will miss me, but I always leave plenty of food out for her. If I don’t, she gets huffy.”

Spence frowned, staring intently at the hotel sign. “I’ll take that as a yes. Do you mind if I stop by the grocery store? I was going to grab a bite to eat on the way home, but most places are closed.”

“Sure, let’s stop. That way I can pick up a few things, too.” Shopping with Spence. How could that be fun? She tried to picture him doing something as ordinary as pushing a grocery cart—and she could as long as she imagined a frown on his face.

The traffic report droned on, filling the silence between them. Spence was absorbed in negotiating the slick streets. Snow fell harder with each passing minute so that by the time they climbed out of the truck three blocks away, she sank into snow up to her knees. And to think it had been sunny with blue skies only this morning.

She crunched in beside Spence, who stopped to make sure she didn’t fall on the shoveled walkway in front of the automatic doors. The rock salt was having a hard time keeping up with the gathering ice. Once inside, Spence separated a cart from the others with a snap of his wrist and, with a commanding walk, took off in the direction of the bakery.

“Due to bacterial formation, you should always buy from the meat department last,” he told her.

Yes, this was pretty much as she imagined it. She wasn’t surprised when he hauled a list out of his pocket and, with a glance, headed off for the bread aisle.

She, being much less serious, lingered by the boxes of donuts. They didn’t have the powdered sugar kind, so she chose a package of blueberry muffins with powdered sugar tops.

“Give them to me.” He held out his hand.

“Don’t tell me how bad these are for me,” she warned him with a smile as she clutched her muffins.

“They aren’t steel cut oatmeal, that’s for sure.” He took the package and set it in one corner of his cart, far away from his whole grain, extremely healthy kind of bread. “The next aisle over is coffee and tea.”

“Oh, and hot chocolate.” She led the way. The moment she turned the corner, she spotted Marin Baylor, youth pastor from the church, debating over two boxes of tea.

“Lucy.” She looked up with a welcoming smile. That smile slid from her face like snow off a tin roof when she gazed over Lucy’s shoulder. “Spence?”

Marin sounded a little shocked to see them in the same store together. It was the together part that was so shocking, apparently. “My car got plowed under. Spence is rescuing me.”

“That’s mighty Christian of him.” Marin nodded thoughtfully. “Spence, did you get my message about Project Santa? I’m sure I’m on your callback list, but since we’re face-to-face—”

“Yes, I meant to call you. The week got away from me.” Now that he was speaking with Marin, the tension eased from Spence’s jaw and broad shoulders.

He really is a handsome man, Lucy thought as she watched him reach into his other pocket and pull out a small notebook. He thumbed through it, pulled a pen out and made a note or two. It was church business, and she didn’t want to interrupt or listen in, so she let her mind wander.

When exactly had he started avoiding her? She studied the man who looked so good in his black winter coat, trousers and black boots. He was in good shape; he probably was one of those admirable individuals who worked out and ate wisely all the time.

But what was attractive to her about Spence wasn’t his physical appearance. It was how he stood soldier straight and full of honor. It was the respectful way he talked to women. It was the kindness he showed to small children. She’d seen him with his niece and nephew when they were in the store or at church. Why was a great man like him still not married? Aside from the distant and difficult personality.

“Well,” Marin said. “I’ve got to get going. They’re forecasting another six to eight inches before midnight. You two drive safe. See you on Sunday.”

Lucy had time to say goodbye and give Marin a wave before the pastor was off, hauling out her cell phone. Spence, judging by the scowl building on his face, had noticed, too. Lucy feared the ramifications. “Do you think she’ll tell Katherine?”

Spence shook his head. “This spells trouble for me, but I’m used to trouble. It’s hard not to be with so many sisters. You must have siblings, too.”

“One sister, but she and I are worlds apart.”

“Some days I think I’m on earth and my sisters are on Pluto, but I don’t think that’s what you mean.”

Who knew Spence McKaslin could quip? Lucy started down the aisle, wondering what other surprises might come her way. Spence always seemed so, well, grim. Maybe he was an interesting and potentially funny guy. “I’m the only Christian in my family. It annoys my mother to no end, who treats me as if I’ve been sucked into oblivion by a giant sea squid.”

“Is that a roundabout way of saying she does her best not to talk to you?”

“Yep. My dad pretty much follows her lead. He’s a pharmacist and somehow uses that as his reason why there can’t be a God. Anyway, I’m not exactly banned, but if I announce that I’m coming home, there’s this long silence and a polite, well, how nice. I’m sure we can make room for you.” And exactly why was she telling him this? She didn’t tell anyone this. Embarrassed when he didn’t say anything, she turned the corner and headed down the milk and eggs aisle. She grabbed a carton.

He came up beside her and took one, too. “What about Thanksgiving? They’re not flying in?”

“No.” Now he probably thought she was someone who allowed deception. Her chest bunched up, making it hard to breathe. “I don’t like to actually explain this to people.”

“You mean to someone you don’t especially like?”

“To someone I don’t especially know,” she said and wondered at the wince on his face—not a scowl. Spence might not be as grim and as emotionless as she’d always thought. “It’s painful, and so I just try not to have to talk about it. You have a wonderful family. Your sisters adore you. You have the perfect parents. You are very blessed, Spence.”

He shook his head. “Maybe you don’t know that Dorrie isn’t my real mother.”

“No.” She didn’t know the family well, only Katherine. “I guess I just assumed.”

“Nothing can hurt like family,” he said quietly.

For a nanosecond, she heard something else in his voice and then in his silence, but he broke away and headed toward the packaged shredded cheeses. She went to grab a box of butter quarters, and the span of distance was between them again—not just a physical one but one far more significant.

It was hard to see much of anything through the amazing downpour of thick, continuous, wind-driven snow, but the condominium complex looked new and snazzy. Shrouded trees and bushes lined plentiful sidewalks and walkways. Long stretches of white hinted at lush spacious lawns hidden beneath.

A front light flashed on, illuminating a snow-covered walkway and porch. Lucy unlatched her seat belt. This was it, where she and Spence parted company. At least the uncomfortable silence would be over, but that didn’t make her feel any happier.