His Hometown Cowgirl (12 page)

Oh yeah. That was more like it.

Pete closed the door and followed her to the
kitchen, admiring her shapely butt encased in worn denim. She set
the box down on the table, then turned to face him. Gripping her
hands in front of her, she wrung them together, obviously feeling
awkward, distressed. She cleared her throat. "A lot happened since
you walked into my office yesterday. We . . .uh, never got a chance
to talk. I think we need to talk, now more than ever."

"I agree." Pete pulled out a chair for her.
"Why don't we sit down and be comfortable?" It would also be safer.
He wouldn't be tempted to pull her into his arms and kiss her
worries away.

Kelsey took the seat. "Thanks."

Pete sat across the table from her, keeping a
careful distance.

She lowered her gaze and stared at her
clasped hands on the tabletop. She sighed heavily. Damn, he hoped
she wasn't going to cry again. Seemed like he was always making
Kelsey cry lately.

Not good, Lafferty. Not good at all.

In his heart, he knew they should never have
kissed. But Jesus Christ, he'd never experienced anything like it
before in his life. He really, really wanted to kiss her again,
taste her sweetness, swallow her moans of pleasure, feel her body
beneath him, push into her moist heat.

Pete adjusted his position on the hard
kitchen chair. He stared at the box of cinnamon rolls, wondering
what to say. He looked again at Kelsey. His nostrils flared, and he
inhaled her fragrance. Immediately, his body reacted with a
vengeance. Now that he'd kissed her, he craved more. Wanted more.
Needed more.

Damn it all to hell.

Kelsey lifted her gaze to his. "I don't know
where to begin," she said. Her eyes were somber, and she was
worrying that lush bottom lip again, the one he'd become intimately
acquainted with yesterday. The one he'd like to worry with his own
teeth.

Get over it, Lafferty. Not going to happen
again.

"Pete, I--"

"Listen, kid--"

They both smiled. Pete was glad to note that
this smile was more genuine, more relaxed. He needed to do
something, say something, to diffuse the awkwardness and get them
back on an even keel. Calling her
kid
was a good place to
start. It would serve as a reminder that they were destined to just
be friends. Nothing more.

Only when he thought about never kissing her
again, never making love with her, he felt an overwhelming
emptiness punch him in the gut.

Get used to it, buddy. It is what it is.

"Why don't I begin?" Pete said, ignoring his
body's signals, focusing on fixing things between him and Kelsey.
"After all, I was the one who came to your office yesterday so we
could talk."

Kelsey nodded, her blue eyes wary,
shuttered.

Pete sat silent for a minute staring at her
sitting there across the table from him. She'd grown into such a
beautiful woman. It was only natural he'd want to kiss her, possess
her, right? It was just a red-blooded male's honest reaction to a
pretty female.

Keep telling yourself that, buddy.

Only, he knew the truth, even if he didn't
want to face it. Kelsey wasn't just another pretty female. She was
Kelsey McCade. She'd been a part of his life for years. What they
shared was very special. Even her crush on him had been special,
made him
feel
special.

But he didn't really want to talk about that.
He didn't want to talk about any of it, actually. What guy in his
right mind wanted to talk about feelings and messy shit like
that?

Except, he needed to fix their relationship,
so they needed to talk. It would be better in the long run to
discuss what had happened between them instead of letting it fester
into something that would push them further apart.

He'd had such good intentions when he'd
walked into her office yesterday. What the hell had happened? Those
good intentions had obviously vanished as soon as their lips
connected. From that moment on, he hadn't been thinking with his
brain, just going on primal instinct.

Hell, he couldn't say
that
to Kelsey,
either. But he had to say something. He needed to fix the mess they
were in. Needed to make it right. He cleared his throat. "I already
told you I was sorry about what happened at Mrs. Ruth's party."

Kelsey sat up straight and nodded agreement.
"And I told you it was
my
fault. I'm sorry for leaving you
standing in the middle of the dance floor. That wasn't very nice of
me."

"Don't worry about it." She bit that bottom
lip again. Pete dragged his gaze away and focused on her eyes as
she continued the discussion.

"I want to apologize for throwing myself at
you yesterday," she said. "The only excuse I can come up with to
explain is that you made me feel . . . alive. Something I haven't
really felt since Chris died."

Pete hunched a shoulder. "You didn't throw
yourself at me. I was just about to kiss you, when you beat me to
the punch."

"Really?" she said with a small smile, then
shook her head. "Well, anyway. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done
it."

"Hey, it was just a kiss, kid. It didn't mean
anything. It doesn't
have
to mean anything. We can't
let
it mean anything."

"Oh, God. I know. We can't get involved,"
Kelsey said. "I don't want to get involved with
anyone
right
now. You know what an emotional wreck I am. Besides, I don't want
to ruin the special bond we share, that we've
always
shared."

Pete nodded. "Exactly. We'll put this episode
behind us, and make sure we never let it happen again."

"And . . . we can't let this change things
between us," Kelsey said. "We're both adults. We can do this,
right?"

"Right." Although, that was a big part of the
problem, Pete thought. But that was another thing he couldn't say
to Kelsey. He opened the box she'd brought from Sarah Sue's and
grabbed a cinnamon roll. Something,
anything
to occupy his
hands and mind. He bit into the gooey tender pastry. "So, we're
good?" he asked around the mouthful of cinnamon roll.

Kelsey grabbed one, took a bite and smiled.
"Yeah, we're good."

Her smile looked a little forced. Pete could
certainly relate to that. They might tell each other it was only a
kiss. They might try to believe it didn't change things between
them, but they were just fooling themselves.

Pete had the sneaking suspicion that
yesterday they'd experienced a life-altering event. At least, he
had. He'd been around the block enough times to know that kissing
Kelsey was different. Way different. But then . . . she'd always
been different. He took another bite of the cinnamon roll and
stared at her from across the table. She stared back a moment, then
quickly lowered her gaze.

Well, hell.

The week before Thanksgiving was jam-packed
with guests visiting Farmtime Trails morning to night. Kelsey and
Maddie took several groups horseback riding up to the canyon and
back. The brisk November breeze made for exhilarating trips and
returning to the compound was that much better because hot cocoa
and s'mores around the campfire would be waiting for them at the
end of the ride. And of course, Molly always had something special
planned for the afternoons.

The Saturday and Sunday before Thanksgiving
would be the last weekend of the season. And then their
first
season would be officially over. Farmtime Trails would
be closing for the winter and wouldn't open again until early next
fall. With luck, the new bed and breakfast would be ready to open
for guests by then.

Kelsey couldn't wait to get that project up
and running, but it would be well after Christmas before she could
concentrate and focus on work. Right now, she had guests waiting to
go on the hayride. She and Maddie had flipped a coin to decide who
would drive the tractor. Kelsey had won the toss and was heading
for the trailer-load of guests when Pete showed up and offered his
services.

"What are you doing here?" She jammed her
hands in the pockets of her jacket.

"Molly called me," Pete said by way of
greeting. "Something about she needed Maddie's help with the
afternoon activity and you needed a driver. So here I am. It's no
big deal. Just say:
Thank you, Pete.
"

When he smiled that lopsided grin she knew so
well, Kelsey's stomach dipped in a now familiar way. Pete stepped
forward, about to say or do something, then suddenly stopped. He
lifted his Stetson and raked his fingers through his brown hair,
leaving it disheveled and rumpled. Kelsey gripped her hands into
fists inside her pockets. She could imagine him looking just like
that in the mornings when he first got out of bed. The sensual
image made her insides turn to mush. She had no business conjuring
up such a scenario, given their fragile friendship-treaty over the
last couple of weeks.

Kelsey felt her cheeks flush as she
deliberately blocked the sexy visual from her brain. "
Thank you,
Pete
." Damn her voice for being all breathless and
fluttery.

"You're very welcome." Pete touched her nose
with his forefinger in the old way, and she knew he was trying to
act normal and return to the relationship they'd shared before . .
. The Kiss
.

Don't be so dramatic, for God's sakes. It
was just a kiss. Okay, a couple of kisses. Kisses she seemed unable
to forget
.

Kelsey appreciated Pete's good-intentioned
effort, truly she did. Except somehow, it didn't matter how many
times she thought they'd finally put the kisses behind them, she
had the oddest urge to launch herself at him, snuggle up against
his rugged frame and beg him to kiss her again.

He looked at her with a smile playing on his
sculpted lips. "You all right, kiddo?"

No
. Kelsey shook away the sensual
thoughts and nodded.
Get with the program, Kels.

"I'm fine," she said, pasting an answering
smile on her face.

If he was determined to act like nothing
happened, then she could pretend, too. That's what she wanted,
right? And if the sadness crowding her aching heart wasn't totally
due to the loss of Chris any longer . . . well, nobody needed to
know that. Better to hurt a little now, rather than hurt a whole
lot later down the road as a result of starting something with Pete
that couldn't go the distance. He never went the distance with
girlfriends. Kelsey sure didn't want to be one of his castoffs. No
way, no how.

"Okay!" she said with mock enthusiasm and a
big fake smile that made her cheeks ache. "Let's get this show on
the road." Without waiting for him to follow, she jogged toward the
tractor and trailer where the guests were assembled for one of the
last hayrides of the year.

In a way, Kelsey was glad this was the final
week of the season. The time off would give her and the twins the
opportunity to reorganize and restructure things for their second
business year. Expansion would take quite a bit of money, but you
had to spend money to make money, right? In the months ahead, they
would work together to plan next year's activities. One of the
first things on the agenda would be to hire more help for the
hayrides and the corn maze. A couple of part-time employees would
make the overall operation run smoother.

Kelsey hopped into the back of the trailer
and sat on a bale of hay, greeting the guests, going into her
happy-hostess mode. It wasn't long before she was actually enjoying
the hayride and leading the group in song. She really was lucky to
be doing something she loved here on the ranch. She should count
her blessings and quit dwelling on past sorrows.

The trailer hit a bump and several of the
children squealed. Pete glanced over his shoulder. "Sorry about
that, folks. Hold on tight, okay?" He winked at Kelsey before
turning forward again to focus on the road.

She couldn't help the flutter of her foolish
heart in response to the sexy man driving the tractor. Yes,
Farmtime Trails definitely needed to hire a driver. Then Pete
wouldn't be called in for last minute duty. Kelsey was sure he
would be relieved to be let off the hook. And maybe the less they
saw of each other, the sooner the kisses they'd shared would fade
into distant memories.

Yeah right, Kels. You know Pete's kisses will
haunt you for the rest of your life. They were that good.

Damn.

****

Two days later, Kelsey walked out of the Salt
Fork Bank after depositing the last week's receivables into the
Farmtime Trails' account. The sun shone brightly, but it was still
brisk and cold.

She stood next to her truck a moment and
breathed in the crisp autumn air. She took in the gorgeous blue
sky, and that's when she saw the black smoke on the western
horizon. Damn, looked like another wildfire running rampant over
the dry, brittle prairie lands. When the sound of helicopter
propellers whirred from up above, she knew Pete was already on the
way to help contain the fire.

Her heart leapt into her throat and a chill
raced down her spine. This was yet another reason she didn't want
to start something with Pete. She couldn't handle waiting for hours
on end wondering whether he would return safely from fighting a
fire . . .
or not
.

She'd lived with that fear every minute of
every day after she'd started dating Chris. She'd made up her mind
that the anxiety would be worth it as long as she and Chris could
be together. And then, he'd died in the line of duty, fighting a
fire that had run out of control.

Kelsey shielded her eyes as she watched the
helicopter fly out of sight. The chopper was carrying another
firefighter she had the misfortune to love. Why couldn't she fall
in love with someone who worked in a safer occupation?