Hitman's Captive: A Bad Boy Romance (39 page)

Then
she looked up at me and the light shifted against her face. The stark bruise on
her cheek, now that she’d removed her make-up, stole my intent. I stepped close
and raised a hand without thinking, cupping her chin and running a light finger
over the discolored skin.

“Fuck,
Bella…”

Her
wide eyes looked up at me, and the expression there had nothing to do with that
bruise. Her skin was flushed with the same need pounding inside me, her breath
catching as I held her caught with just one light touch. The way she reacted to
me drove me crazy, made me wild as I had been that night years ago.

All
thoughts disappeared as my mouth dipped towards hers and I took the kiss I’d
been waiting a lifetime for. She moaned into my mouth, arms coming around my
shoulders and body melting against mine as I’d dreamed of so many times. My
hand slipped to hold her neck, the other coming around to run down her waist,
her hips, her ass. The t-shirt did a poor job of stopping me, and I paused as
my hand enjoyed the contrasting sensations of rough fabric with smooth skin
underneath, the hint of panty lines making me nip at her lips.

I only
kept us like that a moment, unable to hold the chaste kiss when I wanted to
taste her so badly. My tongue slipped into the warm softness waiting for it,
her mouth parting easily as I took what I wanted. Then we were together - her
hands all over me, exploring as they slid under my t-shirt and ran across the
hard, ripped muscles of my chest. That made her moan, and she fell closer
towards me, my own hands encouraging the way she leaned against me. I wanted to
touch and caress every part of that hot, forbidden body - push her onto the bed
and show her all the things I’d been thinking of on those cold, distant nights
alone.

My
cock was harder than I could ever remember, just from that kiss, and I couldn’t
believe what she was doing to me as I grunted and maneuvered us closer to the
bed. This was what I wanted. Needed. One last, hard fuck to get the thought of
that tender, delicate body out of my system.

We
landed easily, her breath leaving her in a delightful way as I held myself just
above her, mouth whispering along her lips, chin, cheek, neck. My tongue
flicked out, marking her, tasting her, and I fought the urge to use my teeth as
well - claim her in the raw, primal way I was longing to.

“God…Seth…”

Her
voice was light, dazed, and so hot for me. It shot straight to my cock and I
pressed a leg between her thighs. That was enough to make her buckle under me,
hips moving of their own accord as I flashed her a glance full of all the power
swelling inside me, born of desire and need. I could see what it was doing to
her, knew from the way her hands clutched at me that she wanted more. Needed
everything I did. As if we were made for each other, bodies fitting together in
perfect harmony.

Growling
at the romantic crap that refused to leave my mind, I lowered my head to her
heaving breasts and took them in my mouth through the t-shirt. She gave a
strangled sound, fingernails clutching into my back as I lavished her with my
tongue.

Fuck,
yes.

I
hadn’t imagined this was how the evening would end, even when I extended that
initial invitation - but it was everything I’d wanted. The chance to finally
finish what we started, and I reveled in that just as much as her body. All
those dissatisfied regrets…
closure.

I
shifted, bringing my lips back to hers and she kissed me with a ferocity to
match my own. I could feel the way she shuddered beneath me, the power of this
affecting her as deeply as it did me. Her hand held the back of my head as I
came up, the military grade buzz-cut not giving her anything to grip, but I
loved the feel of it against her fingers anyway.

I met
her eyes and the rest of the world disappeared, caught in the vortex swirling
between us. She paused, gasping for air a little as she looked at me, and my
stomach tightened at the flicker I saw there. I tried to lean back in to
continue that divine kiss, but she spoke first.

“Seth…wait.
What is this - what are we doing?!”

Something
inside me screamed in rage at the interruption, at her god-damn never-ending
questions and what they might mean. But the echo of our first night came back.

“Seth…what
is this?”

Now,
as then, there was no way I could answer it. I didn’t have words for the depths
of emotions rampaging through me. But I knew what it had to be. There was no
choice - nothing else available to us. This was the end.

“This
is…one last night of fun, babe. One fucking fantastic way to bury that pent up
history…the goodbye we should have had.”

The last
became a murmur, but I couldn’t help expressing it. This could never have
worked, I wasn’t built for it and I knew it - but leaving after that hot night
of passion, without a word…that wasn’t how it should have gone.

Her
eyes flashed for a moment, and I saw the heat and need there, the desire
seducing her as it had done me - until my words sent a wave of shock and pain
ripping through that, the sight of it hurting me as much as her.

“I…no, Seth. I can’t.”

I looked
at her, not understanding for a long moment, until she started to wriggle under
me, shaking her head.

“I’m
sorry…no, it’s not going to work. I can’t do that.”

“What?”

She
pushed at me, but she was completely ineffectual against my weight and size, and
I couldn’t gather my wits enough to move.

“Bella?”

My
mouth reached down to nuzzle at her, but she ducked her head and pushed at my
shoulder again, until I finally got the message to shift off her. She didn’t
meet my eyes as I lay next to her, body on fire, wondering what on earth had
just happened. I reached out to her but paused as she moved back. Something
within me ached to see it, and I found myself unable to push where I was
clearly not wanted.

She
took a deep breath, as if only just coming out of some confused daze, before
finally meeting my eyes again. The sadness there made my heart clench.

“I’m
sorry Seth…I can’t do that. I…it’s not that simple for me.”

I just
looked at her.

Of
course it isn’t…

She
could sense my disbelieving outrage. The blood was pumping hard in my veins and
it was all the self-control I had to lie here and look at her, not explode all
over the room. Need and determination surged through me with something akin to
adrenaline, and I needed to be up, active, using it. Not lying here listening
to a ridiculous, rich girl talk herself out of the fiery passion that had felt
impossible to stop.

Her
features twisted at whatever she saw on my face, anger flaring for a moment
behind the lost, sad look on her face.

“I
mean - fucking to say goodbye? That’s the dumbest idea I’ve ever heard. Talk
about opening a can of worms.”

As I
looked at her, untold emotions coiling within me, I considered that maybe she
had a point. Maybe. But only because she was an uptight ass who couldn’t just
let loose and have fun. Had to write meaning into everything.

I felt
myself closing off as I dragged my wild feelings back from a dangerous
precipice.

“Fuck.”

“I’m
your step-sister, Seth. What the hell were we thinking?!”

Now
that she’d stepped past the raging lust, she seemed to be working her way up to
what she no doubt thought was the
right
expression to have in this
situation.

I
wasn’t in the mood to deal with it.

“Okay.
Fucking bad idea. You’re not interested in screwing around. Got it.”

I
pulled myself out of the bed, disappearing into the bathroom before she could
say another word. Once there, my calm dissolved and I let my breath out slowly
as my head tilted against the closed door.

Fuck.
Shit. God-damn fucking shit.

My
cock - idiot that it was - still held most of the blood reserved for my brain,
and I found my hands clenching with the need to find something to rip and tear
to pieces. Anything to get the hot desire out of my veins. Even the adrenaline
highs had never been this bad - and at least I knew how to work those off. I
idly wondered what Bella would say if I decided to go for a 10 mile run right
about now…

But
I’d promised not to leave her.

The
infuriating, stuck-up girl who had wormed herself under my skin and got so
damned stuck there I was still feeling the effects.

Well,
fuck this plan to hell.

I
ignored the conflicting mess of emotions and decided I was never going to work
them out tonight. Instead, I took a few deep breaths and gave myself some weak
attempt at relief, letting my internal compass flick between inordinate cursing
and acceptance until I felt calm enough to emerge.

When I
did, the light was off and I could see Bella’s outline under the covers to one
side of the bed through the streetlight coming through the blinds. I paused for
one moment, seriously considering taking the floor for the first time, but
pushed the notion away. I wasn’t going to sacrifice myself for the girl who’d
just exploded at me for trying to give her something she desperately wanted.

Taking
the other side of the bed, I turned away from her and pillowed my head on an
arm, unable to help noticing her warmth and the soft impression she left in the
bed, only moments away from me. Every sense was still on fire, attuned to her
in a way that kept my body coiled tight. I didn’t even have words for the
unexpected desolation I felt like this, my back turned to her as we firmly
ignored each other.

I
thought back to the endless freezing cold nights of BUD/S, the tense,
controlled terror of nights crawling through pitch-black tunnels on deployment.
That had been worse than this. It had to be. But as my ears strained for the
lightest sound of her light breathing, my body tensed in anticipation of her
slightest movement, I couldn’t bring myself to believe it.

Eventually,
her breathing evened out and it was just me staring into the clinical white
light from behind the blinds.

With a
deep sigh, I settled myself down for a long, sleepless night.

Chapter Ten

Bella

I let
myself in with a barely contained sigh, the mid-morning sun glinting from the
windows framing the front part of the house and making it look more friendly
than it felt this morning. My cheek was throbbing and I had a headache from the
night spent tossing and turning, as well as the early start.

And
worst of all, I could still feel his hands on me…his mouth teasing me…the
ferocious look in his eyes as he’d made me feel like the only person in the
world. My body was practically quivering from the memory of it, betraying me
again and again as I replayed his kiss, that deep penetration to my very core.

Every
few minutes had me cursing myself for stopping him - but it had been the right
thing. I couldn’t have continued. Couldn’t have let myself get sucked into that
divine vortex where nothing else existed. I wouldn’t have come out again -
maybe he could use a one night stand to bury the past, but for me, it had
cracked open something I spent so long sealing shut. Something I was afraid had
splintered just from his touch.

Fuck.

The
drive back had been one of the more awkward experiences of my life - both of us
sat silently, trying to pretend the music adequately filled the thick air. So
much for this trip improving our relationship. If I never saw him again, it
would probably be too soon. I wasn’t sure I even could, with the heat still
burning between us—

“Annabelle!”

My
father’s sharp voice had me pausing on the second step.

Please
not now.

I
turned with an apologetic expression as he marched down the long hallway.

“Hey
dad. I’m sorry about—”

“Where
were you?!”

His voice
came out clipped and angry, and I took a deep breath to try and calm my nerves.

“Seth
and I went on a road trip - we meant to be back—”

“Without
telling anyone where you were going?”

“I
left a note—”

“With
no information.”

I
couldn’t work out whether I felt annoyed or uneasy at his aggressive
questioning. He didn’t usually get riled up like this. Then again, I couldn’t
remember the last time I’d done something to concern him.

“We
got caught in traffic, dad, I’m sorry.”

“And didn’t
think call to let us know? We were up all night wondering whether to call the
police, but without knowing where you were, there was nothing we could say!”

Guilt
stabbed through me as I suddenly realized I hadn’t even considered calling him.
After the mugging, talking to my father had been the last thing I would’ve
wanted to do, and then when we gave up for the night…well, then there were even
more distractions. I think I vaguely recalled noticing my phone was out of
battery and I didn’t have a charger with me, but that was as far as my thoughts
had gone. Heat flushed my cheeks as I looked at the mixture of anger and
concern on his face.

“I’m
sorry, dad - really. I…didn’t think about that.”

“I’ve
never known you to be so inconsiderate, Annabelle.”

The desolation
I’d returned with deepened as shame hit me. I never disappointed my father, and
I honestly couldn’t believe how absent minded I’d been yesterday. The whole
thing was a disaster.

“I—”

“What
happened to your cheek?”

His
anger had started shifting towards concern, but there was an accusatory tone in
his voice as he frowned and stepped forward to try and tilt my head into the
light. I jerked back, cursing myself for not being able to cover it properly. I
thought about lying about it - then the fact I was considering renewed my
feeling of shame. I wasn’t one of those girls - I didn’t go out places and lie
to my father about where I’d been or what I’d done. Instead, I bit my lip, and
couldn’t quite meet his eye.

“It’s
fine. We…I was mugged - but it’s fine. Nothing happened, Seth scared the guy
off and got our stuff back.”

The
memory of
that
made my body heat again - the intense emotions coupled
with Seth’s arms around me, the fiercely controlled look in his eyes as he
dealt with it with a competence that had shocked me, making me feel safe and
protected in a way I’d never known.

I
shook my head to get the images out of my mind as my father just stared at me.
For once, he might have been speechless. For a moment.

“Just
where
were you, Annabelle?!”

My
flush deepened and I found myself growing annoyed with the whole conversation -
I really didn’t want to give my father a list of my mistakes. I wanted to find
the safety of my room, collapse on my bed, and give up on the world. Why
couldn’t he just let me do that?

“We
went to San Francisco.”

I
hated how small my voice sounded, but I honestly had nothing in me to justify
the trip. His uncomfortable stare only intensified.

“What?!
Why
?”

I
opened my mouth to reply, and then realized I had nothing I could say. I’d wanted
to come back from this trip with a solid case for my plans and ideas -
something to impress and convince him. Now…I had nothing. And the last thing I
could do was admit any of that. Instead, I just shrugged, feeling defeated as
my hopes came crashing down around me. He looked at me for a moment, as if
expecting me to say more, before shaking his head with such a look of bitter
disappointment my stomach sank down to my feet.

“I
don’t understand you, Annabelle. I thought you were better than this complete
irresponsibility - just the other day you were trying to claim you’re ready to
stop studying. I think you need to spend some time considering your actions -
and I don’t want you leaving again while you do so.”

The
need to scream in frustration overtook me. For the first time in a long, long
time I felt the urge to scream and swear at him. To storm off to my room and
slam the door shut. To prove every doubt he ever had about me. My teeth were
gritted hard and in horror I felt my eyes prickling with hot moisture. My hand
clenched the banister tightly enough I wondered if my fingernails would gauge
the fine dark wood.

Instead
I took a deep breath, nodded and turned to the stairs, everything inside me
quietly shattering. I thought he might stop me, add something else to wreck me
completely, but he didn’t. I felt his hard eyes on me the length of the stairs,
and I paused when I was finally out into the upper hallway, waiting for the
relief to come. It didn’t.

I
escaped into my room as I heard Cora’s inquiring voice below, the small part of
me still feeling anything glad that she hadn’t been around for that
altercation. I drew the curtains closed, shutting out the cheery morning sun,
and tucked myself up under the covers. It was childish, but I didn’t care.

Not
leaving sounded just fine by me. If I never left this room again it would be
too soon.

I let
the twisted, confused turmoil of it all take me and finally gave into the tears
threatening my eyes. This time, there was no one to catch me as I fell.