Hollow Dolls, The (24 page)

25

Melanie was on the internet first thing. She was about to write
Winnie and something on the news that caught her attention.

...the disappearance last night of heiress Kim Li: A ransom
demanding two million dollars was issued this morning at six am to the
Vancouver Police.

Alejandra would want her to help find Kim Li. Melanie felt the
side of her breast under her shirt where the Alejandra’s needles had been
planted in her flesh. Still a good pain feeling there. She wanted to see her
again. The attraction was overwhelming her thoughts and the feelings in her
body.

Melanie had been possessed by the woman with the long dark hair. It
was a woman she had created in her mind and dreamed of becoming.

“Imagination creates reality.” It was what the Man-Rabbit had said
to her. It was true.

She sent a quick email to Winnie.

Winnie,

I want us to share. I need someone who
can understand what is going on inside me so I’m not alone. Where are you? We
were the ones who began everything weren’t we?  xx Melanie.

Melanie got a bottled water from the fridge. Poured some ritalin
into her hand. Looked at the pile. That was too many. She left three, scooped
the rest back in the container. By the time she was in the elevator she
realized she still had the ritalin in her palm. Her hand felt like she couldn’t
make a fist. Like she’d just woken up from a long strange sleep. She popped the
ritalin in her mouth and went to take a drink of the water. An angel hair
stream of water shot out from the cap onto her lips.

The top was still on.

She screwed it off and gulped the ritalin down.

"Alone,” she said to herself.

Standing in the elevator, alone, alone, alone.

Hole in the water bottle. Nobody home, home, home.

She was feeling mesmerized as she dreamed of Alejandra. She wanted
to go straight to her doorstep and offer herself. She’d be gone far away if she
did that. Perhaps losing Winnie in the process. It was like smelling salts
bringing her back to reality.

In the alley entrance she slipped down the back hall like a thief.
Melanie gave a two finger knock on the door and went straight into Scott’s
office. He didn’t turn to look. The office was tiny like in any bar, the floor
space saved for the front end. She sat in the chair across from him waiting
silently.

“Be with you in a second.”

“No hurry.”

Scott turned.

“Well, hello.” He spoke melodically.

“Have the police said anything about Kim Li?” said Mel.

“No news yet,” he said, disappointed. He wanted her to flirt. She
knew from his eyes. She needed to take care of business first and took out her
iPhone to show him the audition video.

“Very nice,” said Scott. His eyes didn’t leave the tiny screen
until the video ended.

“Billie helped me.”

“So when can you start?”

“Anytime. A few nights a week if that works.”

“Sure. I’ll fit you in as a feature starting next week. The
schedule is posted over the bar and back in the dressing room. You can always
check there. Pay your fees to the cashier. Sixty bucks at the start of the
night. Hang on to your receipt.”

“Okay.”

“Billie can fill you in on the details. She handles the girls,”
said Scott. “Are you okay?”

“I’m a bit messed about what happened to Kim Li,” she said. She
was trying to block out thoughts of Alejandra. She brushed her breast, feeling
the punctures which were reminders of what she really wanted.

“It’s pretty scary, even for this neighborhood,” said Scott.

When she looked up to him she switched modes realizing that he
might have awoken something in her too. “I want to talk.” She reached out and
took his hands, then rubbed her thumbs across his knuckles like she was
counting each one carefully. “Lately things have been changing for me. A lot.”

“What’s going on Melanie?” said Scott.

“She was caught in a kind of fear that she didn’t understand.

Nobody wants to say it first.

“Nothing. I just feel messed up.”

“I gotta get back out front,” said Scott. “Let’s get together
later.”

Melanie sat back at the bar feeling she’d blown it and should have
told him.

She must have told someone before. She couldn’t remember—it was
still sketchy. Bits and pieces everywhere. Had she ever been in love? Winnie
said they couldn’t, that she hadn’t ever loved before. She felt like she was
falling in love with people all over the place and then it would just disappear
until she saw them again. Alejandra was different. It felt like a blood
marriage. Same for Winnie. She was something like a part of her, like a dark
spirit bride.

“Can I buy you a drink?” A voice from behind interrupted.

“No thanks,” she said automatically as she turned and shook her
head.

 “Oh, hello there. Any luck finding your bird cage?”

“Nah, not yet. That’s freaky about Tifa getting taken right out
back eh?”

Melanie nodded. She could tell Vic was pretty high. She wanted
some. It loosened up the intense love knot she had in her brain right then.

“Be right back,” said Vic.

Vic walked down the bar to Scott. Melanie had the urge to get up
and leave. Go back to Alejandra. Nigreda wanted her to go too. Vic would want
to take her somewhere and fuck again. Nigreda said, “Maybe, he’ll get you high
and get rough with you.” Her mind was flying all over.

“No,” said Melanie aloud.

Vic stood right next to the first man she’d ever really fallen in
love with.

 Fallen in love?

Melanie slipped a xannie between her lips. Vic came back as she
swallowed it, finishing off the bottled water from her pack.

“You must have enjoyed the pubs back in Britain.” He stared into
her eyes like he was trying to hypnotize her and had a strange smile on his
face. “Where did you live?”

 “London. I grew up here though.”

“I haven’t been across the pond,” said Vic. “I’d like to
though...”

His voice trailed off and she didn’t really hear what was saying.
She was watching his face carefully. Something odd was happening.

“You should go.” It was just something to say. Like she was
misdirecting the attention of a bad wolf.

“London’s really—”

Melanie was startled. Vic’s face was changing in front of her!

It was too much! She stood up from the barstool and stepped back.
It was Dentowne’s face! The older man with the saggy skin. She lost her balance
and fell to the floor.  

The man stood and helped her up. It was Vic again.

They looked at each other for a moment.

“Are you okay?” said Vic.

“It was nothing. I’m a klutz,” she said pretending to be calm.

“You should have seen your face. It was a bit scary,” said Vic.

She looked at Vic and a voice said, “Take him to Portside Park.”

It was as clear in her ears as if someone had said it out loud.

She knew the voice. It was the Man-Rabbit’s.

“Go for a walk after this?” she said. “To the park?” It was all
happening on auto, like the clockwork.

“To the park?”

Vic looked excited. “Sure!”

After drinks, they walked toward the park. The Man-Rabbit was on
one side and the Vic on the other. Vic’s lips moved yet Melanie heard no sound.

Help Kim Li learn
, said the Man-Rabbit.
She
is your twin in the field. You will learn from each other.

“You’re really here?”  said Melanie.

The Man-Rabbit nodded.

 “Can Jack be here too?”

The Man-Rabbit shifted into Jack.

“You’re here! Why didn’t you know me in the restaurant?”  

She tried to grab his arm, and he was gone.

“What’s that?” said Vic.

“Oh, nothing.” She put her arm through Vic’s and they walked on.

As they got into the park, she led him past the trees and the
granite shrine down to the water. She began to feel all the things that were
related to this man she was walking with. It was as though she were swimming in
the memories of his blood. His ancestry and all of what she knew was there in
her mind, speaking to her in some strange way without language. Everything
locked into place again. It was like at the apartment when Peter showed up. The
munchkin trinkets. The clockwork.

She stopped and turned to him at the water’s edge.

“I’ve come for you Robert.” Mel spoke in Cloe’s voice to Dentowne.
 Cloe was inside her with Nigreda. Melanie had the urge to run away to keep Cloe
with her forever because she loved her so much. She stepped back as Vic’s face
shifted to the old man Dentowne, then back again. Out of nowhere, Vic swung his
blade toward Meanie’s face as she was lost in her love of Cloe.

Melanie ducked away stumbling to the ground. Vic had caught her on
the head with the blade. She felt blood drip to her cheek as he came toward her.
She kept her eyes low playing hurt. When he got close enough she kicked him in
the groin. As he doubled over she jumped up and kicked his face with full force.
Melanie picked up the blade and dragged him by the scruff over the top of the
embankment. He was barely conscious. Melanie looked around for bystanders. It
was clear.

“Justice time,” she said.

Melanie didn’t want to hear him speak. She sliced the straight
razor into his neck again and again with Cloe’s hand inside her hand. Cloe was
one with her. The blood gushed onto the mud embankment. They saw the stars and
fish in blood. All of them. He gurgled a few throaty pleas as whatever life was
in the body drained away.

Melanie stuffed a few rocks in his pockets, and the corpse rolled
down the embankment toward the water. With a splash the body plunged in. Bits of
rock and pebbles rolled down after him making little splashes in the water. He
bobbed a few times and was sucked under.

 “Thank you for freeing me,” said Cloe.

Melanie turned to look. Cloe wasn’t there. She took her rabbit out
and held it. Vic’s blood was on the white surface of the rabbit. Sitting on the
mud embankment, doubled over in pain with the straight razor in her hand she
saw there was blood all over her hands and some on her jeans. It was dark and
she was spun. She saw the cuts on her wrists and remembered they were from the
bathtub. Her and Winnie. Her and Winnie. So many of their experiences together
flashed through her mind. All the pills she’d been taking. The trip to the
island.

Down at the water’s edge she threw up violently. Miscarriage. Some
beast foetus. Melanie’s world coagulated like the blood that was everywhere. She
felt urges for sex with Vic from deep inside her. It was the three of them
again. Her, Nigreda and Vic, ready to play with darkness. All the dark wolves. Maybe
she was one of
them
. She washed off.