Home Again (2 page)

Fuckity-fuck. I do not want to get into this right now.
“I’ll have some later. I’m just gonna go for a walk.”

“Devin said you were supposed to be keeping a low profile, honey.” Mom grabbed a plate anyway, and started to dish me up.

“Mom—I’m not hungry, okay? I just got off a four-hour flight. I need to stretch my legs.”
Jesus.

She set the plate down on the table. Then she crossed her arms, and gave me the look that told me I was going to get a verbal ass whooping.

“Aisley Marie Carter, sit your butt down and eat the damn food. Why do you think you’re here? This isn’t a damn vacation.”

“I know. I wouldn’t want to vacation on Satan’s island, anyway, Mom!” I spat, feeling like a complete bitch the second the words left my mouth. What the hell was I saying? I wasn’t a bratty fourteen–year-old. I was a twenty–year-old woman, for Christ’s sake.

Dad gasped. Mom instantly grabbed the plate and dumped the contents into the trash. “Fine. Do what you want. Just remember, we’re only trying to help you.”

“Mom, I’m sorry.” But she didn’t stick around to hear my lame apology. She hightailed it out of the kitchen, and fast.

Great. Person number two pissed off, and I’ve been off the plane less than two hours.

“Be careful out there, Ais. At least wear a disguise, a lot of kids are home from college for the summer. And I’m glad you’re home, honey. It’s been too long.” Dad gave me a kiss on the forehead before walking out, too.

Well, Fuck.

***

It really sucked not having a car. I walked through the streets of Burden, feeling a little chilled. I forgot how testy the weather was here. It didn’t help that I was only in jeans and a t-shirt. No coat, and certainly no disguise, as my dad suggested. I wasn’t walking anywhere in particular; there weren’t many places
to
go in Burden. Sure, the town wasn’t tiny, but it was smaller than what I was now used to. My parents only lived five blocks from the original town center. Which, of course, that went to shit once they built a Wal-Mart and an Applebee’s on the other side of town.

At least we still had the generic noodle place on our side of town. Despite what I told my mother, I was starving. I can never eat before I fly, because I get too nervous, so I hadn’t eaten all day. Mom’s meatloaf sounded like heaven right about now, but instead I had to go into bitch mode right when I got home.

So noodles would have to be good enough.

Or not. Because, apparently, the noodle place went out of business.

Fuckity-Fuck. No generic noodles for Aisley.

Across the street, was the local bar, The Watering Hole, so I figured what the hell? I had a fake ID, not that I ever had to use it—because when people saw Aisley Carter in their bar, they served drinks without question, and sometimes even without charge.

It was a Sunday evening, so the place was near empty.
Perfect.
I sat down at the bar, and grabbed a menu.

“ID please,” the bartender said, walking up.

I grabbed my fake ID out of my purse and handed it over.

“Cindy Carlson, huh?”

“Mmhmm.” I nodded, still studying the menu. “I’ll have a Long Island Ice Tea and an order of Nachos.”

“It’s funny, because you look an awful lot like Aisley Carter. My daughter has posters of
her
all over her room, C
indy.
”

Busted. “Okay, so I’m not Cindy, but I’m trying not to blow my cover, so that’s why I use that one.”
Smooth Aisley, real smooth.

“You
are
twenty-one, right?”

“Would I be in here if I wasn’t?” I retorted. I would be twenty-one in a couple months, so what did it matter?

He either must have believed me, or didn’t give a shit, because he just shrugged, and started to mix me a drink. Sliding it across the counter to me, he smiled. “Four bucks, sweetheart.”

“Keep the change.” I passed him a ten-dollar bill.

“Hey, do you think I could get an autograph… for my little girl?”

“Of course.” I knew that was coming. It always did. Not that I minded most of the time, because it came with my dream—it was a package deal. “What’s her name?”

He slid a napkin over to me. “Karen. She’s seven, and she just adores you.”

I scribbled my name down. “Here ya go. I’ll be in town for a while, maybe I can meet her,” I offered, taking a drink of my Long Island.

“Serious?” he asked, dumbfounded.

“Yeah, why not?” I shrugged. I loved meeting fans. The fact that someone loved my music enough to buy it, or put up posters of me in their rooms, or come see me play, was still unreal to me.

“That would be great. She lives with her mom, so I only get her every other weekend. She would love me forever if she got to meet you.”

“I’m sure she already will.” I smiled back at him. “Just could you do me a favor, and not tell anyone I’m here? Low profile, and all?”

“Of course.”

“Cool. I’ve got a few things I have to take care of this week, but I’ll let you know, okay?” Devin, of course, would throw a shit-fit if he found out about this. I was supposed to stay out of sight, not meet up with fans. If he had his way, I would have stayed in treatment another two months.

“I’ll get your food order to the cook. My shift ends in about five minutes, so I’ll catch you later.”

“Could I get another Long Island real quick? Oh, and what’s your name?” I asked, downing the drink in my hand.

“It’s Brad.”

“Thanks, Brad.”

“You are very welcome, Aisley.”

After mixing me the drink, he smiled and walked back to the kitchen.

I may have pissed off two people, but I’ve made one very happy.

So maybe I’m not all bitch
.

When the cook brought out my food, I had a pretty good buzz on. One and a half Long Island Iced Tea’s will do that to a girl. Especially a girl who doesn’t do too much drinking.
Too bad I never feel very hungry once I start drinking.
My mom’s words filtered through my mind.
“Why do you think you’re here?”
I groaned, pushing away my plate.

“Hello, beautiful.”

I whipped around, hearing a man’s voice. Maybe I should’ve brought a disguise. A group of twenty-something’s filtered in the door behind him. “Can I help you?” At least the guy was cute. I didn’t recognize him, so we must not have gone to school together.

“Yeah, I was just wondering if you had a map.”

“A map?”

“Yeah, I need a map, because I keep getting lost in your eyes.”

Cue the pretty girl vomiting. “Well, that was—”

“Cute?”

“A little sad.” I laughed. “What’s your name?”

“Mark.” He stuck out his hand. “And you are?”

“Not happening, sad boy,” I joked, shaking his hand.

“Aww, come on.” He smiled a pearly white smile. “That doesn’t even get me a name?”

“Be happy it got you a handshake.” I chuckled, and took a drink.

“At least let me buy you another drink.”

“No, I’m fine. Thanks anyway, Mark.”

“No strings. Just one drink and I’ll leave you alone. Come on.”

“She said no, Mark.”

I looked past Mark, and found myself getting lost in the most beautiful green eyes. The same green eyes that haunted my dreams; the same ones I didn’t think I’d get to look into again. The butterflies were back with a vengeance.

“Mind your own damn business, Easton,” Mark said with an eye roll.

“Aisley, here,
is
my business,” he challenged.

“Holy fuck. You’re Aisley Carter,” he said, a little louder than I was comfortable with, causing me to glance around, hoping I was just being paranoid. Nobody seemed to be paying attention to us. I downed the rest of my drink and got up.

“It’s been fun, boys.” I gave Mark a polite smile and glanced at Easton. He was still as handsome as I remembered. He kept his brown hair a little shaggy, so when he leaned just right, his hair fell into his eyes. Like now. I had to force myself to look away as he brushed a few stray strands out of his face. I started to move past them, but Easton grabbed my arm. “Ais, are you drunk? Did you get her drunk?” he asked to me, then to Mark.

“Whoa, I had nothing to do with this. I didn’t know she was your girl, man,” Mark said, with his hands up, backing away. “See ya, East.” Then he threw me a quick smile.

And I was left with Easton Everson.

The perfect guy, who I left behind two years ago.

His hand was still on my wrist, and tingles from his touch were shooting up my arm. Those damn butterflies started dancing wildly, too. Like they were taunting me. My breath caught in my throat. I hadn’t seen East in two years, so what the hell was I supposed to say?

He dropped his hand, and I felt my heart drop a little with it. How he had this much control over my heart after two years, was beyond me.

“East.”

“Hey.”

“How are you?” Stupid question.

“Fine,” he said tightly. He was angry, I could tell. “What are you doing home, Aisley?”

Home.
There was that damn word, again. This wasn’t home anymore.

“I—” Didn’t he read the gossip sites? No, probably not. This was Easton Everson, who once told me he’d shoot himself before he would ever read garbage like that. “I just had some time off.”

“You, superstar, have time off?” He gave me a hard look. “Are you driving?”

“No, I walked.”

“Jesus. It’s like fifty degrees outside. Tell me you brought a coat.”

I shook my head.

“Christ, Aisley.” He shook his head disapprovingly. Even after two years, he still cared. It was obvious, and caused my heart to pick up speed.

“I’m fine, Easton, really. I live, like, five blocks away.” Err, crap. No
I
didn’t. “I mean, my parents do. But you know that.”

“Here, take this.” He pulled off his navy blue zip-up sweater, and shoved it into my hands. “And be careful. I’ll see you around.”

“Wait!” I shouted, before he could turn away. “I’m sorry about your dad, and I’m sorry I couldn’t make it to the funeral.”

He looked me over for a minute. His eyes held a darkness that was never there before. “Yeah, me too, Aisley. Me, too.”

***

Chapter 3

“You think this thing between us doesn’t scare the shit out of me, too? I’ve never felt this way about anyone else.” East ran a hand through his shaggy hair.

“East—I don’t want to ruin what we have.” He was my best friend. I couldn’t lose him.

“Who says it will?”

“Statistics. We’re sixteen. I’d rather be a realist.”

“Well, I’d rather be a romantic,” he said stubbornly, pulling me close.

“I’m scared something’s going to happen and we won’t even be friends, anymore.”

“There’s not a thing that you could do to cause me to stop being your friend, Carter. Even if we don’t work out as a couple, I’ll always be here for you. I… I love you. Just say you’ll be my girlfriend. Tell me you want this as much as I do.”

A knock on my old bedroom door shook me out of a beautiful dream about the boy with those perfect emerald eyes. I groaned. If I hadn’t seen East last night, I would have been perfectly fine. I wouldn’t have dreamt of him or his damn intoxicating eyes. My head was pounding. I wanted to go back to sleep, but the knocking continued.

“I’m up. Come in.”

Mom walked in, as chipper as she always was. “Ais, honey it’s ten-thirty. How late were you out last night?”

“Not late, I’m just jet lagged,” I lied.

“All right. I made pancakes, if you’re hungry.”

My stomach rumbled at the thought. “I’ll be down in a bit, okay, Mom?”

She nodded, and closed the door behind her.

If only she’d taken my pounding headache with her.

Reluctantly, I got up, grabbed some fresh clothes, and walked straight into the bathroom for a shower. Fifteen minutes soaking in the hot water did absolutely nothing for my headache, but it did make me feel a little better.

As soon as I walked into the kitchen, the smell of pancakes overwhelmed me, and I dished myself up a whole plate, smothered in butter and syrup. My mother really was a good cook. My dad always told her she should start up her own restaurant, but she never did. She told him she was perfectly happy being a mother and a housewife. Something I never understood. I would never be content with that kind of life. Ever.

And that was why I had to get the fuck out of this town.

“Oh, good, you found the food.”

“Yes, Mom.” I rolled my eyes. “If you were trying to hide it, you did a bad job.”

“Oh, hush,” she said, shaking her head. “Your father’s at work, and I’ve got a few errands to run. Are you going to be okay alone?”

“Yes, Mom,” I said in between bites. “I’m a big girl.”

“Have you heard from Devin?”

“Not yet.”

“Well, don’t avoid him, Ais. It’ll only make things worse.”

“I know, Mom.”

“And have you called the doctor, yet?”

“No, Mom.” She would drive me crazy before the day’s end, of that I was sure.

“Aisley, you need to do that. Today.”

“Yes, Mom.”

“Okay. I love you.”

“I love you, too.” I was relieved when she left without saying anything more. I knew I had to talk to Devin eventually, and I knew I had to go to the damn doctor—I just didn’t want to yet. I wanted to feel normal for at least one day.

After eating about half of my food, I grabbed my cell phone off the counter and dialed my best friend’s number. “Becks, what do you think about some chill time?”

***

“Is it weird that I haven’t seen your apartment before?”

Becks shrugged. “You’ve been busy. I understand.”

It was true, I had been busy, but I had days off—weeks off, occasionally—and I could have at least come by for a visit. But I didn’t. In fact, I rarely called. I could probably count on my hands the number of times we spoke since I had left. “I’m a shitty friend.” I decided.