Hope (13 page)

Neal began to sob.

Karen petted his head as tears streamed down both of their faces.

"Please don't leave me," he moaned.

"Make me another promise."

"I can't."

"You must."

"I can't,” he cried.

She lifted his head and looked through his eyes and into his soul. "Promise me that you'll live on. Promise me you'll survive this.”

"I can't make that promise."

"You must, because you're the only one left that will keep us alive. If you die, no one will say our names; you must survive and carry on."

Neal lowered his head, tears raining down.

"Promise me," she begged.

"I promise," he relented.

Squeezing his hand with what little strength she had, she said, “Thank you.”

“You can’t leave me, you can’t.”

“You’re going to hate me.”

“Why would you say that?”

“I need you to promise me something else.”

In what could be her last moments, he was resolved to make her happy. “Anything.”

“You’re a strong man, a good man. I want you to survive so you can help people. Promise me you’ll help those in need, those who are weak and innocent. Be their strength, be the rock they can cling to for salvation.”

Neal slowly shook his head and said, “I don’t think I’m that man. I wasn’t strong enough to save Beth. I wasn’t smart enough to know something like this could happen to us. I didn’t prepare; I wasn’t ready.”

“Oh, sweetheart, don’t do this, don’t torture yourself. You’re a good man with a noble heart. I’m angry at the world, but not you, you’re my soul mate, my one true love. I’m just so sad that I won’t be with you.”

“Karen, you can’t give up. You have to fight.”

“Where’s Bethie? Have you buried her yet? Please tell me you haven’t.”

“In her bed, she’s lying there like an angel. She looks like she’s just sleeping.”

“Take me to her; carry me to her, please.”

His entire body shook, and the weakness he felt wouldn’t stop him from fulfilling her wish. He stood up, shoved his arms under her frail frame and lifted.

With her arm around his neck, she rested against his shoulder.

With every ounce of strength and determination, he walked the distance to Beth’s bedroom and placed Karen next to their daughter’s lifeless body.

Karen instantly curled up next to Beth’s body and began to cry loudly. “My little baby, I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry.”

Neal fell to his knees and sobbed more.

Karen petted Beth, running her fingers through her hair. “My little baby, my poor baby.”

Neal grabbed Beth’s cold hand and kissed it. He’d give anything to have her back, but it was all too late. He was losing his family and there wasn’t anything he could do about it.

“Can you get me some water?” Karen asked.

He looked up and towards the nightstand. The glass there was empty. “I’ll be right back.” He braced his weight against the footboard and stood. He stumbled out of the bedroom and towards the kitchen. He tore the kitchen apart, looking for fresh drinking water, but couldn’t find any. “Damn it!” he groaned. Knowing more cases of bottled water were in the garage, he headed there.

After finding the water, he made his way back. When he reached Beth’s bedroom door he looked in and saw them lying still. He took that moment to reflect, take a mental snapshot. These two were his purpose, his life. Without them, life wasn’t worth living. He entered the room and said, “Sorry it took me so long.”

Karen didn’t respond.

He unscrewed the cap and with a shaking hand offered it to Karen.

Still she didn’t move.

He looked closer and could see her eyes were open but lifeless. “Karen?”

Nothing.

He dropped the open water and crawled up on the bed. “Karen, Karen, wake up.”

The weight of his body on the bed made her head roll easily.

He placed his fingers on her neck and prayed he’d find a pulse, but there was nothing.

“Karen, no, Karen, please God, no!” he cried and slumped over them. He turned his gaze towards the ceiling and screamed out, “NO!”

Guatay, CA

Hope couldn’t stop talking about the day trip she and Drew had taken yesterday. On and on she kept mentioning it.

Only after Charlotte heard they had gone to her house to get toys and other things did she regret not going.

She was grateful that Drew had thought of her enough to bring fresh clothes. She just wished she could have seen the house, but it didn’t matter, she’d be seeing it soon enough.

The concerns about Tony and his men following her and Hope home made her anxious. She was sure they’d go looking for them, and it was natural to think they’d go to her house. Bob himself couldn’t give her assurances, so it was a big risk.

As Hope played with the toys she had brought back, Charlotte sat in silence, her diary next to her.

“You want to play with me?” Hope asked.

“No, I’m busy,” Charlotte replied.

“You don’t look busy,” Hope said.

“I’m thinking.”

“About what?”

“I’ll tell you later.”

Hope jumped over to her and said, “Tell me now.”

Charlotte was hard on Hope, even more so since losing their father. She deeply loved her little sister and never had she ever felt jealousy for her. Even when Hope was born, Charlotte rejoiced in having a baby sister and made it her mandate to take care of her.

Hope wasn’t a planned birth. She happened as a result of making up after a bitter argument, or that was what she heard her parents joke about. Being twice Hope’s age did make the reason seem legit, but if she was an accident, her parents never showed her. Their affection for Hope was poignant and intense.

“Do you trust me?” Charlotte asked.

“Yes.”

“So if I say you need to do something and it was very important, you’d do it without asking questions?”

“Yes.”

“Good.”

“Why?”

Charlotte smiled. If Hope could be described as one thing, it was curious. This, of course, would mean you’d have to negate her being the happiest child ever, but putting aside her happiness, Hope was constantly asking questions. She thirsted for knowledge and had an intellectual curiosity.

Without asking, Hope gave Charlotte a hug.

“What was that for?” Charlotte asked.

“You look unhappy, and remember what Mommy said…”

“Sometimes a hug is all you need to make it all feel better,” Charlotte said, repeating one of their mother’s common sayings.

“Do you feel better?” Hope asked.

“I do.”

“Good. Now do you want to play with me?” Hope asked innocently.

Knowing she wouldn’t find the answer that very second, Charlotte decided to just be and play with Hope. Like their mother also said, “Live in the now and appreciate that special moment because once it’s gone, it’s gone forever.”

El Centro, CA

Neal lay with his family for hours. He fell asleep several times and woke with the hope they’d be alive and that it was all some horrible nightmare; but it wasn’t a nightmare, it was worse than one. His worst visions had come true. He felt as if someone had ripped his guts out and seared his heart with a hot poker. Death was something he welcomed. He wanted more than anything to have his illness take him too, but deep down he felt he was slowly recovering. Was it because he was stronger than them or that he had only ingested a little juice? Did that matter?

After all the reading, he knew that the survival rate was fifty percent if left untreated. Was it a numbers game and his family lost? For him death was welcome to come snatch him away. There was nothing to live for now. There was no purpose, no reason to take another breath.

He lay staring at the ceiling. He kept going over the reasons why they died and he didn’t in a weak attempt to justify what happened, but alas, it was stupid to. His mind then shifted to satisfying his last desire. If his illness wasn’t going to take him, maybe he should do it himself. It would give him back one thing he had lost: his ability to control his life.

With renewed purpose and a plan, he got up and started the preparations for his final act.

Guatay, CA

Charlotte rarely chewed her fingernails, but now was an exception. She paced the back alley behind the barn, watching the sun slowly descend in the west.

The energy of the compound was increasing with each degree the sun lowered, in anticipation of the evening’s festivities.

Drew too was especially amped. He had come to the girls’ room earlier and told them he had a surprise he would share later, one that would make them happy.

Charlotte was curious as to what it was but equally skeptical.

Drew hadn’t taken away the knife he had given her days before, so she proudly wore it on her hip.

Bob stepped out into the alley and lit a cigarette. He walked up to her and asked, “You’ll be here at nine, right?”

“I said yes.”

“Okay, because this has to happen without a glitch.”

“I know.”

Bob adjusted his loose-fitting jeans and with a cracked smile asked, “So whatcha gonna do about pretty boy?”

Charlotte’s only reply was a movement of her right hand to the hilt of the knife on her hip.

“Ha, you’re gonna stick him?”

“Maybe,” she replied, acting cocky.

“Really? You’re tougher than I thought. You’re one ruthless little bitch.” Bob cackled.

Charlotte twisted her face in anger and snapped, “You just make sure you’re ready, because we will be.”

“I will, my plan isn’t foolproof, but if it works, we shouldn’t be hearing from Tony or his guys again.”

Satisfied, she turned and walked back inside. A heavy feeling hit her. Would she be able to subdue Drew? Would she be capable when it mattered most? It was easy to act tough, another to be tough.

Lost in her thoughts, she stepped in the room and found Drew kneeling in front of a half-naked Hope. Her emotions went from shock to anger. “What are you doing?”

Drew turned around, surprised by Charlotte’s abrupt and angry tone. “I, ah.”

“You’re sick; get your hands off my sister!” Charlotte yelled.

“I, ah, I was just…” he said, attempting to defend his actions.

Charlotte’s blood was boiling. She could hear Bob’s voice echoing in her head to prove she was not the entitled little brat he thought she was. “Get away from her!”

Hope squirmed away and ran to the corner of the room.

“Hey, I was just helping her,” Drew said, standing, his arms raised in a defensive position.

Charlotte pulled the knife from the sheath and advanced. “You’re sick, I knew it.”

“No, you’re misunderstanding; I was just helping her—”

“You’re sick, sick, sick,” Charlotte screamed and lunged at him.

She landed on top of Drew. Her weight and the force she came at him with caused him to fall to the ground.

“Charlotte, stop this. You’re acting crazy,” Drew said.

“Bob said you liked little girls. He was right,” Charlotte declared, taking the knife and swinging it down into Drew’s shoulder.

Drew howled in pain.

She withdrew the knife and came down again. This time the knife struck him in his chest.

Drew gasped once then died, his eyes wide open.

Charlotte pulled the knife out and struck one more time. Her rage had blinded her to the fact he was dead.

Hope was curled up in the corner, crying.

Blood began to pool around Drew.

Charlotte took a deep breath and looked down at what she had done. She pulled the knife from his chest, looked at the thick blood dripping off the blade, and finally realized she had done something horrible. She dropped the knife and leapt off his body. “What have I done?”

“Why, why did you kill him?” Hope sobbed.

“He was…um, he was trying to hurt you,” Charlotte replied, rocking back and forth, her legs pulled up tight against her chest.

“No, he wasn’t. He was helping me put on the dress he got me. He got you one too,” Hope yelled.

“No, you’re wrong. He was trying to hurt you,” Charlotte said.

“He was helping me. He got us dresses to wear, our favorites from the house,” Hope screamed, tears flowing heavily down her face.

“No, he wasn’t, he was a bad person,” Charlotte said. She jumped to her feet and went to Hope. “Take my hand. We have to go.”

Hope looked at Charlotte’s blood-covered hand and kicked at her. “No, I’m not going with you, you’re crazy!”

Charlotte looked at the grisly scene and knew they had to push up their plans. “Come with me. We have to leave, now!”

“No!”

“Come now,” Charlotte barked, grabbing Hope by the arm.

“Ouch, you’re hurting me!” Hope yelled.

Charlotte dragged her across the room to a wall locker. She opened the doors and froze when she saw the dresses.

“Let go of me,” Hope yelled.

Charlotte reached out and touched the pink pastel dress her parents had bought her just before all the troubles occurred. She touched the silky sleeve then recoiled when the blood from her hand stained it. “You were right.”

Hope struggled to free herself from Charlotte’s grasp.

“He was just helping, wasn’t he?” Charlotte said, realizing she had murdered Drew out of anger and without justification. She was never really going to knife him, though she had insinuated that to Bob. She was only going to knock him out and tie him up. Killing someone was too much, even for her.

Hope tried to pry Charlotte’s hand off her arm, but she couldn’t, so she used the next best thing, her teeth. She bit down on Charlotte’s knuckles.

“Aww, damn!” Charlotte cried.

The door to the room burst open, and Bob came rushing in. He opened his mouth to say something then paused when he saw Drew’s body. “Oh, my God, you did it.”

Hope sprinted past Bob and out the door.

“You really did it. Girl, you have bigger balls than I do, that’s for sure, but don’t you think you could’ve waited? We’re a bit ahead of schedule.”

“Stop her,” Charlotte hollered.

Hope raced out the front door and across the yard.

Charlotte followed, but Bob grabbed her from behind.

“Nope, you go out there and it’s over. Once they find out you killed Drew, you’ll be the main event in the fight tonight.”