Hornswogglers, Fourflushers & Snake-Oil Salesmen
Read Hornswogglers, Fourflushers & Snake-Oil Salesmen Online
Authors: Matthew P. Mayo
PRAISE FOR MATTHEW P. MAYO'S WORK:
“. . . I can't recommend it highly enough. The man knows the West and, better still, knows how to tell a story.”
âAndrew Vietze, award-winning author of
Becoming Teddy Roosevelt
“An excellent variety of great stories, told in superb narrative style.”
âJohn D. Nesbitt, Spur Awardâwinning Western author of
Trouble at the Redstone
“Mayo brings the West alive. . . .
Cowboys, Mountain Men & Grizzly Bears
puts the reader right in the middle of the action. Mayo is a writer to keep a lookout for.”
âLarry D. Sweazy, Spur Award winner and author of
The Rattlesnake Season
“[Mayo] is a consummate storyteller with a lively, entertaining voice. . . .
Bootleggers, Lobstermen & Lumberjacks
is American history at its most violent and authentic.”
âHoward Frank Mosher, award-winning author of
A Stranger in the Kingdom, Where the Rivers Flow North,
and
Walking to Gatlinburg
“Matthew P. Mayo, a prolific author of Western fiction, pulls out all the stops of his pulp style. . . .”
â
The Boston Globe
“Mayo's Grittiest Moments books read like Loren D. Estleman and Jim Thompson got together to rewrite a Stephen Ambrose history book.”
âJeremy L. C. Jones,
Booklifenow.com
ALSO BY MATTHEW P. MAYO
Cowboys, Mountain Men & Grizzly Bears: Fifty of the Grittiest Moments in the History of the Wild West
Bootleggers, Lobstermen & Lumberjacks: Fifty of the Grittiest Moments in the History of Hardscrabble New England
Sourdoughs, Claim Jumpers & Dry Gulchers: Fifty of the Grittiest Moments in the History of Frontier Prospecting
Haunted Old West: Phantom Cowboys, Spirit-Filled Saloons, Mystical Mine Camps, and Spectral Indians
Speaking Ill of the Dead: Jerks in New England History
Myths and Mysteries of New Hampshire: True Stories of the Unsolved and Unexplained
Maine Icons: 50 Classic Symbols of the Pine Tree State
(with Jennifer Smith-Mayo)
Vermont Icons: 50 Classic Symbols of the Green Mountain State
(with Jennifer Smith-Mayo)
New Hampshire Icons: 50 Classic Symbols of the Granite State
(with Jennifer Smith-Mayo)
True Tales of the Old West's Sleaziest Swindlers
MATTHEW P. MAYO
TWODOT
®
GUILFORD, CONNECTICUT
HELENA, MONTANA
A ⧠TWODOT
®
⧠BOOK
An imprint and registered trademark of Rowman & Littlefield
Distributed by NATIONAL BOOK NETWORK
Copyright © 2015 by Matthew P. Mayo
All rights reserved
. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the publisher, except by a reviewer who may quote passages in a review.
British Library Cataloguing-in-Publication Information available
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data available
ISBN 978-0-7627-8965-8 (paperback)
ISBN 978-1-4930-1804-8 (e-book)
The paper used in this publication meets the minimum requirements of American National Standard for Information SciencesâPermanence of Paper for Printed Library Materials, ANSI/NISO Z39.48-1992.
To Harold Trent and all his mad, mad schemes. . . .
“A sucker has no business with money in the first place.”
âCanada Bill Jones
“There is ten times more rascality among men outside of the class they call gamblers than there is inside of it.”
âGeorge Devol
“Nobody ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American people.”
âH. L. Mencken
Chapter 1: Ned Buntline: All-American Huckster
Chapter 2: Soapy Smith: Skagway's Slippery Sultan
Chapter 3: The Great Diamond Hoax of 1872: Diamonds Are for Swindlers
Chapter 4: Doc Baggs: Denver's High-End Huckster
Chapter 5: Clark Stanley: The Rattle-Snake King (and Others of the Snake-Oil Set)
Chapter 6: George Devol: King of the Riverboat Gamblers (plus Canada Bill!)
Chapter 7: James Addison Peralta-Reavis: Arizona's Lord of Fraud
Chapter 8: Alexander McKenzie: Biggest Claim-Jumper Ever
Chapter 9: Unhelpful Guides: Untested, Untrue, Unworthy!
Chapter 10: Death Valley Scotty: That Likeable Rogue
Chapter 11: The US Government: Shame, Shame, Shame
Chapter 12: Al Swearengen: Deadwood's Deadbeat
Chapter 13: Pegleg Smith: King of All Liars
Chapter 14: Sheriff Henry Plummer and His Gang of Innocents: Killers and Thieves
Chapter 15: Land Warmongers of Johnson County: Death of a Champion
Chapter 16: Dr. Samuel Bennett: King of the Thimble Riggers (and Other Sleight-of-Hand Men)
Chapter 17: Lou Blonger: Mr. Fix-It (and More Incurable Con Men)
Chapter 18: Land Ho!: Oregon's Land Fraud and the False Promise of Mowry City, New Mexico
Chapter 19: Mary Gleim: Missoula's Wicked Woman (and a Pair of Gamblin' Gals)
Chapter 20: Rustlers Galore!: Dutch Henry Born and Black Jack Nelson
Chapter 21: Old San Francisco: Sink Pit of Swindlers
Chapter 22: Dr. John R. Brinkley: Goat Glands and Radio Waves (and Another Conning Quack!)
A Brief Glossary of Swindling Lingo
My thanks to many people, places, and things for help in tracking down information on various cheats and swindlers, among them: Bozeman Public Library, Alaska State Library, Cave Creek Regional Park, Deadwood History, Hoofprints of the Past Museum, Kansas Historical Society, Library of Congress, National Park Service, all my chums at Western Writers of America, and to my wonderful family, for all the obvious reasons.
I give big thanks to Erin Turner, indulgent editor without equal. And thanks to the swindlers themselves, without whom I would have had a far different year. . . .
Last, but never least, my deepest heartfelt thanks to my wife and partner in crime, photographer Jennifer Smith-Mayo, for her tireless support, patience, and wisdom this past yearâand always. And for conducting all the photo research and procurement for my books, and so much more! Hmm . . . how about a trip to Vegas?
âMPM
From the raw, paint-peeling alcohol of cure-all elixirs to con-artist carpetbaggers with satchels full of shoddy goods to sleight-of-hand card sharps whose wasted outward appearance belied nimble minds and adroit fingers, the Old West teemed with shady characters out for a quick buck and a good time before disappearing to another cow town ripe for the plucking. Like everyone who headed out West, these rascals sought a better lifeâwithout having to work too hard for it. The true tales of their cunning and larceny, and their eventual comeuppance, make for riveting reading.
In this collection I present a number of petty bandits, sleazy bunco artists, and conniving con men (and women), what they did, and why they are remembered for it. Everyone loves a heel, especially from the safe distance that time provides, one to whom little was sacred and who charmed his or her way into the hearts, minds, and wallets of bumpkins and belles alike.
A quick scan of the dictionary definition of “swindler” unearths a stack of salacious synonyms: fraudster, fraud, confidence man, trickster, cheat, rogue, mountebank, charlatan, impostor, bunco, huckster, heel, hoaxer, con man, con artist, scam artist, shyster, gonif, shark, sharp, hustler, phony, crook, quack, bamboozler, and, of course . . . hornswoggler, fourflusher, and snake-oil salesman!
Why is it that the maleficents and their ill-formed ilk get all the wonderful words while the good guys (who, as we know, always finish last) get stuck with “great fella, fine family man, solid, upstanding . . .”? Hmm. . . .
The pages of Old West history are filled with examples of people who misled others unwittingly, the whole while thinking they were doing the right thing. They are not swindlersâthey are merely well-intentioned rubes. They lack that certain character kink that makes them want to take advantage of their fellows. And that little flaw makes all the difference.
In the most general terms, a swindler is anyone who knowingly takes another person “for a ride,” “leads them down the path,” hoodwinks, hornswoggles, or outright dupes another. The key to this particular lock, as I have learned, is the word “knowingly.” Truly successful swindlers are not only fully aware of their nefarious efforts, they are also unfailingly intelligent, brazen in their approach, possess enormous reserves of self-confidence, and are able, time and again, to pick themselves up, dust themselves off, and sleaze their way back into the thrill of whatever game it is they adore.
At some point in every swindler's life, someone should hold him down and shout, “You rascal! You rogue! You have done too many people wrong! You must change your ways or you'll spend time in prison!” Maybe even plant a knuckle sandwich on his kisser for good luck. But it doubtless would do any good. A swindler is a swindler is a swindler. A rascal is a rogue is a rapscallion is a rake is a . . . and there's no way to mend them once they're born. So we just have to live with them and suffer their ill effects for days, weeks, months, years, decades, and centuries to come.
What one man considers swindling another might well call opportunism. It can be difficult to define the gray area, but most of the time the determination's an easy one to make. Take Al Swearengen, Deadwood's premier baddy. He lied to women, attracted them to his Gem Variety Theater under false pretenses, and hooked them on drugs until they withered away. Then he replaced them with new, fresh-faced girls from back East lured to Deadwood by a pristine round of his grand promises. Swearengen operated in no gray area. He was a vicious thug who lied to innocent people, then duped them further.