Hot Stuff

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Authors: C. J. Fosdick

Tags: #Contemporary,Humorous/Romantic Comedy,

BOOK: Hot Stuff
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Table of Contents

Excerpt

Praise for CJ Fosdick

Hot Stuff

Copyright

Dedication

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Epilogue

Thank you for purchasing this publication of The Wild Rose Press, Inc.

“Over the years, we’ve learned some lawn décor
Evan brought home belonged to that category you call a 10-99…er…some might call it this.” He finally smiled when I pulled a handful of candy hearts from my pocket and singled out the one that read
Hot Stuff
.

“Billington knows about all this?”

“Certainly. Our neighbors are aware of this, too. When something goes missing, they usually show up here first to see if it’s planted in his
garden
. If they can identify it, we simply have a custody exchange, then mollify my brother with a trip to a local garden shop for some kind of a replacement.” I popped a candy heart into my mouth and offered him one after flicking a strand of cat fur off the
Kiss Me
heart.

He screwed up his face, clearing his throat. “Valentine candy in July?”

“I won a six-month supply after writing new imprints for the company. The candy has a long shelf life,” I added.

He declined my offer.

“Bite Me.”

“Ma’am?”

“That was one of my slogans. The candy boss wanted something modern.
You Know
was another one. Kids today can’t get through a sentence without sprinkling it with ‘
you know’.

He studied me with a lopsided grin. “Why didn’t Billington tell me all this?”

“I don’t think he knows I write slogans and ads.”

He pulled on his ear. “I mean about your brother stealing yard ornaments.”

“Oh well, I suspect Evan’s fancy may be an inside joke at the precinct.”

Praise for CJ Fosdick

THE ACCIDENTAL WIFE
, Ms. Fosdick’s mainstream historical time travel has reviewers exclaiming:

“part mystery, part romance…”

“written with a style of its own…”

“much more than a time-travel…”

“unique story…”

“loved the characters, ached at their dilemma…”

“every chapter is an incredible journey…”

“flows nicely…”

“couldn’t put it down, or out of mind…”

“mesmerizing…”

“characters and era so real…”

“I laughed, cried, bit my nails…”

“lots of factual details…”

“ranks with best-selling tomes…”

“Fosdick makes readers understand the transformative power of love…”

“full of sights, smells, personalities you would love to meet…”

“I highly recommend this book!…”

“absolutely cannot wait for the sequel!”

Hot Stuff

by

CJ Fosdick

A Candy Hearts Romance

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales, is entirely coincidental.

Hot Stuff

COPYRIGHT © 2016 by Carol A. Fosdick

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission of the author or The Wild Rose Press, Inc. except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews.

Contact Information: [email protected]

Cover Art by
RJ Morris

The Wild Rose Press, Inc.

PO Box 708

Adams Basin, NY 14410-0708

Visit us at www.thewildrosepress.com

Publishing History

First Sweetheart Rose Edition, 2016

Digital ISBN 978-1-5092-0598-1

A Candy Hearts Romance

Published in the United States of America

Dedication

To every Cinderella

waiting for that “arresting” moment

when her Prince knocks at her door to steal her heart.

 

Chapter One

“There’s a cop at the door,” my grandmother sang as she popped out my earplug at the bridge of my favorite song.

The bud dropped to the sleeping cat on my lap, waking him with a start. His tail whacked the can of cola perched on my computer table, spilling half the contents onto my keyboard before I could spring into action using my baggy Einstein T-shirt to sponge up rivers of pop channeling between the letters of my laptop
.

“Cripes, Gran, do you have to sneak up on me!” I unplugged the keyboard, losing the file I was working on. Writing ad copy for a new brand of adult diapers was slipping into writer’s block, anyway. How did anyone come up with clever slogans to hype a personal product nobody admits to needing? Even Wisconsin’s badger mascot wore a tastefully conservative sweater in the logo…without the encumbrance of pants.


Heartlight,”
Neil Diamond crooned from the earplug before I unplugged the iPod still dangling from my neck. In a wild toss to my bed, I upset the plastic jar of conversation hearts teetering on my night stand. Like broken pearls, the candy scattered over the hardwood floor.

The cat pounced after one rolling under the bed.

I felt the pop stain seeping into the crotch of my leggings.
A new use for adult diapers?

“Clean up in aisle four,” Gran chirped from the doorway, scanning the mess.

We both dropped to hands and knees, scooping up the candy.

“There’s a cop at the door,” she repeated. “You know the drill better than I.”

Right. The drill. Barring salesmen or religious proselytizers, we were used to the occasional visit from irate neighbors or the law. Depending on either complaint or warning, I would paste on an innocent smile, hawk up surprise, and then pour out a heartfelt apology with enough charm to get my brother out of a potential law jam.

Evan was autistic. Not enough to keep him from bicycling to a job cleaning floors and tables at a local diner. Certainly not enough to keep him home or even medicated. Aside from his lack of eye contact—or his obsession with TV shows like
The Amazing Race—
he was almost normal to Gran and me…a source of amusement that tapped into the burlesque of life. Living with Evan always kept us grounded.

Normal
as anyone who collects things. Unfortunately, Evan liked to collect garden gnomes, solar lights, any kind of yard ornament with little regard to who owned them. The neighbors who still spoke to us understood. Some of them even nailed down their outside décor and hoisted their flags to a height requiring a ladder. When more than an apology was needed, we queued up a plate of Gran’s specialty—Snickerdoodles. I caught a whiff of cinnamon on Gran as I scooped a handful of candy hearts into my T-shirt pocket. We were prepared for the day.

The cop was slim and wide-shouldered, with blue eyes that almost matched his shirt. His cap had the familiar MFPD blue and gold triangular badge depicting the waterfall that gave Menomonee Falls its name in 1880. The logo repeated on his shirt sleeve.
Dallas,
I presumed, was his name, embroidered on the pocket of his shirt. Aside from the standard leather belt and equipment that hung from it, he wore dark jeans and cowboy boots. Not exactly below-the-belt standard dress for most uniformed cops. This one was also younger than most. Tall, dark, easy to look at. I didn’t have to fake a smile.

He looked ready to use the walky-talky in his hands when I pushed open the screen door and stepped onto our covered porch, hiding the stains embroidering the bottom of my T-shirt by folding my arms across my waist. I hoped I didn’t look too confrontational—or too irrational with a wild-haired Einstein plastered against my chest. “Can I help you?”

“Are you Mrs. Sanders?” He placed his walky-talky in his belt and glanced at the open notepad he pulled out of his pocket. “Mrs. Marjorie Sanders?” he drawled.

I always was a sucker for a drawl…and startling blue eyes. I hugged my shirt tighter, rocking up on my toes. “I’m…I’m her granddaughter, Kate. She’s uh, indisposed right now.”

“Well, ma’am, I’ve been sent here because of a possible 10-99 in the neighborhood. I was given this address and told the Sanders widow might know something about it.”

“You must be new to the PD.”

His dark brows inched toward his nose before he nodded slowly.

“From the West?

He blinked.

I pointed, with a knowing smile. “Your cowboy boots.”

His gaze traveled from his tooled leather boots to the neon green nails on my bare feet, then migrated up my green-and-black striped leggings to my damp baggy tee. “And you must be from…a swamp?”

Wincing, I plucked at my stained shirt.
Oh, Lord, why didn’t I change?
“Cola. Uh, Mr. Wiggins spilled cola on me.”

His eyebrows rose.

“Our cat. Mr. Wiggins is our cat. Long tail.”

His cheek twinged ever so slightly. “Well, then, I’ve been told you may know the whereabouts of a small windmill and plaster Dutch boy?”

“A plastered Dutch boy? I shrugged and waved my hand absently. “I have a younger brother, but he’s German and doesn’t imbibe…not even
‘the beer that made Milwaukee famous’.
” I tried to maintain a straight face, hoping some sophomoric humor might lighten his business tone. I knew a 10-99 was police scanner code for something lost or stolen.

Again, his dark eyebrows migrated toward the bridge of his nose. “Okay then, maybe I need to put this another way. This may be some kind of a test for rookies, but my captain told me missing gnomes could end up at this address. This is 2482 Meadow Lane.” He took a few backward steps to verify the vertical numbers on our porch post, then shot me a squinty look and set his chiseled jaw.

“Did Captain Billington send you here?” An innocent smile wasn’t working. I went for something with more voltage.

“You know my captain?”

I nodded cheerfully. “He is aware of our situation.”

“Ma’am, what situation might that be?”

“Follow me.”I slipped into the flip flops that were on the bench near the door, and then shaded my eyes against the bright sun peeking over the treetops.

The tall wooden gate between our house and garage squeaked open into our backyard. “Welcome to the stockade.” I gestured to encompass our half-acre backyard and the tall cedar fencing that truly gave it a stockade look. “This is my brother’s world—started when he was a child.”

The swing set that once amused Evan for hours was now painted a bright yellow, the glider had a new cushioned seat and a large tractor tire dangling from the top bar, instead of a narrow board swing. The yellow plastic slide was still clean, dulled only by a worn strip down the center. Evan kept the slide polished, and often enjoyed squeezing himself between the sides, arms stretched overhead, eyes closed in his version of a sun salute.

A smaller version of a yellow circus tent dominated the yard, flanked by two large elm trees. Flagstone paths snaked through a jungle of bird baths, yellow benches, assorted statuary, flags, and solar lights cluttering the yard like a maze, all leading to the entrance of the yellow tent.

“Evan likes yellow.” I grinned.

In silence, we both scanned the yard, looking for a windmill and Dutch boy among the statuary. “You can see my brother has quite a collection.”

The cop’s mouth froze open before he rubbed his bottom lip with the side of his fist. “An understatement, I’d say.”

“All bought and paid for,” I added quickly. “Captain Billington knows we see to that.”

He scratched his ear. “Just how old is your brother?”

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