How to Fall in Love (57 page)

“I’m sorry,” I say, looking up at him, admiring his just-fucked hair that he’s running his fingers through, trying to fix.

“You made a fool of me out there today,” he says, finally looking at me.

“I fucked up. I know I did.”

He sighs. “You’re putting me in a hard place. You have no fucking idea how I’m fighting against myself right now.”

“I can’t help the way I feel. I can’t help wanting you the way I do.”

He looks at the roof, his jaw tight. “I can’t . . .” He stops talking, closing his eyes and running his hand down his face. “Shit, Tia, I can’t even . . .”

“I get it,” I say, my voice small. “I do . . . even if you don’t think I do.”

He pins me with his gaze and takes a deep breath. “I’m going to give it to you straight, because you deserve it that way,” he swallows and for the first time I see a flash of vulnerability in his eyes. “I’m not going to deny I feel something for you, because that would be a fucking lie. I do. You make me laugh and when I’m inside you, fuck, it’s never felt so damned good. When you smile, I smile, because something lightens when you’re around.”

“But?” I croak.

“But I care about her, Tia. I can’t just turn that shit off. Has it dimmed since I started sleeping with you? Absolutely. There are times I’ve forgotten to even think about her, and that scares the hell out of me because it means I’m feeling something for you that goes beyond friendship, but I can’t turn off my feelings for her. I’m trying to, but I can’t. I’m in a fucked-up situation, because the truth of it is . . .” He takes a deep breath, closing his eyes. “I care about two women, and for the life of me, I can’t figure out which one is best for me.”

My lip trembles as I stare at him, loving that he’s so honest. It hurts, God, it hurts like hell, but I can’t ask any more of him. He’s given me the truth, and I can’t hate him for that.

“It hurts me to say this,” I force out, “but I get it.”

He shakes his head, giving me a pitying expression. “It’s hard. I want to spend time with both of you to be able to make a clear decision, but how the fuck can I ask that of you? Stay by my side and continue fucking me while I’m doing the same thing with another woman? I needed to show her today, for whatever sick reason I needed for her to see you were second best.”

Oh god. That burns. It fucking burns. Reality at its hardest.

“Are you...are you sleeping with her?”

He shakes his head, eyes intense. “I haven’t. That’s the God-honest truth, Tia. I haven’t put my cock inside her since she’s been back, but I can’t promise that won’t happen. I know what it will do to you . . . I don’t want to be that man.”

My heart aches. It feels like it’s being ripped out of my chest.

“Reign?”

I jerk when I hear Selena’s voice, and I look past him to see her at the door. From the look on her face, she doesn’t know what we just did in here, nor did she hear our conversation. Reign stares at me, holding my gaze for an intense minute before turning to her.

“I’m coming.”

She smiles at him, and I want to hate her, but do I really have the right? After all, in her eyes, I’m the reason Reign is holding back. Just like in mine, she’s the reason. In this situation, who is really in the wrong?

“I’m going to go back to my room,” I say, my voice weak and pathetic. Betraying me when I need it to be sassy and funny.

“Tia,” Reign says as I brush past him.

I turn to him. “It’s simple, if we really want it to be. You don’t have to make the choice, Reign. I do.”

I step past and rush back down the halls to the elevator.

That didn’t go as planned.

~*~*~*~

“A
utumn,” I whisper down the line, talking to her answering machine for the hundredth time. “I miss you. I wish you were here. I could use you.”

I hang up and turn my phone off. I walk into the bathroom, kicking off my shoes as I go. I find a robe and decide I could use a bath. I strip down while the hot water fills the massive tub. The moment it finishes, I step over the side and sink down, sighing with relief as my muscles relax. I close my eyes, letting myself sink into the bubbles.

I’m in there no longer than twenty minutes when I hear my door open and shut. I jerk upright, covering my breasts. Is it house-keeping? I stare at the bathroom door, heart pounding. It creaks open and I let out a little squeak but quickly smother it when Reign steps in. He’s drunk; I can see it straight away. His eyes are glassy, he’s got a real swagger, his jacket is gone, his shirt is half undone and of course, he’s got a bottle of open wine in his hand.

He looks divine.

“Reign,” I breathe, starting at his half-untucked shirt. He looks messy and rugged and so fucking sexy it hurts.

“You can’t keep walkin’ away from me,” he says, dropping the wine on the countertop.

He takes hold of his shirt, tearing it up and over his head, sending a few buttons soaring across the room. He jerks his pants down, causing my eyes to widen.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m going to get in. I’m going to fuck you slowly, and I’m going to try and forget why the fuck I’m doubting everything.”

I bite my lip as he strips down to nothing, his big, hard body straining as he strides towards me. Oh. Shit. I can’t do this right now. I quickly stand, getting out of the bath. I take a towel and avoid his questioning glance. Not to mention his hardening cock. Not worried about me getting out, he walks over and takes my hips, lifting me and placing me on the counter next to the sink.

“Why are you doing this to me? Makin’ me feel for you? I don’t want to fuckin’ feel for you, Tia. I just want you to stop makin’ me feel.”

I swallow and turn my eyes away.

“Don’t look away from me. Don’t be ashamed of the power you have. Embrace it, but just know you deserve better than me. I don’t want you to wait for me, but I can’t fucking tell you to leave. I’m selfish.”

My eyes burn as unshed tears rise to the surface.

“Don’t cry,” he says, leaning down and kissing my tears away. “Don’t fuckin’ cry, baby.”

He spreads my legs and his cock pushes inside me without warning.

“Oh God,” I whimper.

“Don’t cry,” he groans, pulling it back out and sliding it back in. “Never fuckin’ cry for me. I’m not worth it.”

“You are.” I gasp as he begins fucking me for the second time tonight.

“I want my cock inside you; it’s all I think about. Your little pussy consumes me, invading my thoughts.”

Deeper, softer, oh
God.

“Take me deeper,” he growls into my ear. “Spread your legs wider and take my cock so fuckin’ deep you feel my balls against your sweet ass. I’ll fuck you there one day. I’ll make you scream my name with my cock deep inside your ass while my fingers sink into your pussy.”

I tremble and cry out his name, my orgasm scarily close.

“Come for me. Don’t hold back. Give me all of this.”

He plunges deeper. Pushing my ass into the sink but I don’t care. 

“I want to come. I need to fucking come. Milk me, baby, take me inside you,” he hisses, biting my earlobe.

“Then come,” I growl, arching up. “You prick.”

“Fuck,” he moans. “My dirty girl.”

I press myself up into him, reaching down to grip his ass as I find my orgasm. He finds his in the exact same moment, as if we’re one and the same. As I clench around him, his cock pulses inside me.

“Milk me, fuck, God,
yes.
”

I drop back into the sink, sighing deeply. Reign lifts my head, nuzzling my cheek.

“You’ve killed me. It’s official,” he murmurs.

“I could say the same. Mrs. Mufflepuff is out of bounds for the next week.”

He snorts and pushes himself back. “I’m starving and I want more alcohol.”

“Reign?” I ask, as he pulls me up and takes a towel.

“Yeah?”

“Would it be—” I hesitate. “Would it be too much to ask for you to stay with me tonight?”

His eyes flash and he turns to me. “No, that ain’t too much to ask.”

I give him a full-blown, can’t-wipe-it-off-my-face smile.

CHAPTER NINETEEN

“Give me five things I don’t know about you.” I laugh, leaning back into the bed with a bottle of wine in my lap.

“I hate chickens.”

I snort loudly and start laughing hysterically. “Chickens? Why?”

Grinning, Reign drops down beside me, slice of pizza in his hand. “They’re just . . . ugly.”

“You hate them because they’re ugly?”

He shrugs. “They’re like an insult to nature ‘Oh I’m a bird, but I can’t fly. I just run around squeezing eggs out of my ass.’”

I laugh so hard that my belly aches. “You’ve been playing in the special farm too long.”

He chuckles. “No one said I wasn’t special.”

“Okay,” I say, trying to breathe through my giggles. “What else?”

“I have an extreme weakness for cigars. I mean, I’m going to be that old, wrinkled man in fifty years that’s sitting in his study, killing everyone with cigar smoke.”

I wrinkle my nose. “Gross.”

“I love basketball, but I could never figure out how to play it.”

“Poor sad, short man.”

He grunts. “Rub it in, go on.”

I roll, taking my wine with me until I’m settling in the crook of his arm.

“Number four?”

“I love
Family Guy.
”

I burst out with a squeal. “Me too!”

“Yeah?” he says, tangling a finger in my hair. “I knew I liked you.”

“And the last one. Make it count, big guy.”

“I fix old cars when I’m not at work.”

I sit up, staring down at him. “Seriously?”

“Yep.”

“I mean like . . . whoa! You in greasy cover-alls? And I didn’t know?”

He winks at me. “Maybe one day I’ll let you see them.”

“Oh, damn right you will, or I’ll never suck your perfect cock again.”

“Oh, you can’t deny it, you know you can’t.”

I laugh and sink further into him.

“Your turn.”

I pout. “I love hamsters.”

He snorts. “No shit. That thing you owned had a goddamned bow-tie.”

“Careful buddy,” I say, pinching his arm. “Don’t you speak about Henrietta like that.”

“I still claim you’re harboring a mental condition.”

“You’re just jealous because I have the full capability to lick windows, and you do not. It’ll come, old cigar-smoker. It’ll come.”

He laughs again. “What is it about you that makes me laugh so fucking hard? I never laugh.”

“That’s because you’re a stiff.”

He pokes my ribs. “Keep going. What’s number two?”

“I’ve never had a boyfriend.”

He makes a strangled sound. “Are you serious?”

“Yep. I’ve fucked, but I’ve never had a serious boyfriend.”

“This should concern me.”

I huff. “Whatever. None of them have been up to scratch.”

“Let me guess: they didn’t love hamsters?”

I sigh and nod sadly. “You’ve hit the nail on the head.”

“Number three?”

I think about it for a minute. “I get angry at people who pick their skin. You know, like if they have a piece of skin that is hanging in a random spot? And they pick it off and throw it on the ground? It makes me violently angry. I mean, I actually feel the urge to punch them.”

He chokes on a laugh. “Mental condition.”

“Shut up, it’s annoying! Do that shit in private, people.”

“Okay, number four.” He chuckles.

“I own four pairs of granny panties.”

“No.” He gasps.

I hang my head. “Yes, I can’t deny it. They’re so comfortable.”

“My relationship with Mrs. Mufflepuff just got strained. We’ll need to speak about this in private.”

I roll my eyes. “Oh ha-ha, it’s probably why she’s so nice. She’s always warm and protected.”

“She’s probably trying to hang herself with shame,” he teases.

“You’re getting a big list of paybacks, Reign Braxton.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll pay, I get it. Now, number five; make it good.”

I think long and hard. There are so many things I could say right now that would be funny and witty, but there’s only one thing I really want to tell him, regardless of how it might end.

“You, Reign Braxton, are the first and only man I’ve cared deeply about.”

I can’t say the
L
word. It wouldn’t be right for this moment.

I’m not sure how Reign will react. A big part of me is absolutely sure he will pull away like he always does. So when he leans over, wrapping his hand around the back of my neck and pulling me closer, it’s definitely not what I expect. His lips crush over mine and with a whimper, I find myself sliding down onto the bed, his body over mine.

That is the first night Reign Braxton makes love to me.

CHAPTER TWENTY

“Ohhh, God,” I groan, rolling onto my side and clutching either side of my head.

I open my eyes, blinking rapidly. Ugh, gross, one of them is caked shut with that horrible after-alcohol green stuff. I put my finger in and wipe it all off, clearing my vision. The bed is empty beside me. Narrowing my eyes, I slowly sit up, taking great care not to jerk my head in the process.

“Feeling the pain?”

I turn and see Reign at the window, wearing only a pair of sweats. He grins at me, holding up a coffee. “You want?”

I nod. “How much did I drink?”

He stares at the empty bottles on the floor. We managed to get through three.

I groan.

“Break it to me now, what did I say? How did I embarrass myself? Tell me I didn’t talk about Mrs. Mufflepuff. God, did I insult her? Don’t listen to me, it’s all lies.”

His grin widens. “If I tell you, how am I supposed to have leverage? Mrs. Mufflepuff and I have some seriously good secrets between us.”

I drop back, pressing my hand to my head. “You’re lucky I’m dying right now.”

“Here,” he says, walking over with his hand stretched out.

I lift my head and stare: Aspirin. Thank God. I take it and reach over for the glass of water he hands me. I swallow it quickly and force myself back up again. “I think I need to shower.”

“Got a business breakfast. You want to meet me there?”

I’m sure my face turns green. “Breakfast?”

He grins. “Yeah, breakfast. You want to give it a miss?”