How We Fall (22 page)

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I didn’t see Will again until Wednesday evening. Chris wanted me to go hang out with his friends again, saying something about how Mara liked having another girl in the group.

Will picked Chris and me up in the green Neon that afternoon. Plastic bags from the store heaped one side of the back seat.“Look at that,” I said. “This guy doesn’t even know to use reusable bags. Or paper bags, at the very least.”

“Ouch. And to think I didn’t smoke just for you.” Will backed down the driveway.

Chris peered into the grocery bags. “What the heck did you buy?”

“Just stuff. It’s for a game.” Will braked at the stop sign and turned toward Harris.

“Disgusting. I don’t want to play that game.”

I was a bit worried about what was in the bags, but decided not to ask. “So, are you working somewhere this summer?”

If he actually was going to ask me out—which he might not, since I’d turned him down already—I wanted to know more about him.

“Oh, yeah, I work at Walmart. Pays rent but not much else.

Hence the beer shortage.”

“Well, beer is gross, so that’s fine with me.” I found myself scanning the streets of Manson as we drove past, looking for the white truck, but I didn’t see it. The parents had relaxed a little now that it had been a while without anything else happening.

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We still had no explanation why that guy had run us off the road, and no word from Sheriff Whitley on who he might be.

When Will parked in front of his house, Chris helped Will carry in the bags. Kyle and Mara were already inside. Will and Chris set the bags on the end table in the living room and unloaded them. I gathered up the plastic bags as they set out a bottle of cheap butterscotch schnapps and club soda. Will opened the fridge and pulled out tabasco sauce, mustard, soy sauce, and lime juice, and carried them out to the living room.

“You don’t cook much, do you?” Mara crossed her arms.

“I can cook well enough,” Will said. “But this is our new favorite drinking game.”

“Hell, no,” Kyle said. “I don’t even know what the game is, and I can already tell it’s a bad idea.”

“Just listen.” Will went back to the kitchen and came back with five shot glasses. “Turn on some music, Chris.”

Chris flipped through Will’s iPod and hooked it up to the stereo.

“Here’s how it works.” Will lined up the condiments.

He wasn’t standing too close to me, wasn’t finding ways to

“accidentally” touch my arm, and he was talking to everyone instead of directly to me. Hardly even any eye contact. He must be taking my no flirting comment seriously. “These are numbered one through five. Soy sauce is one, schnapps is five. Now, everyone pick one of the dice.” He shook six-sided dice out of a small cloth bag. “The number you roll corresponds to one of the condiments. Put that condiment and club soda into your shot glass. We’ll shoot them together.”

“Wait. What if we roll a six?” I asked.

He looked over at me, and never had I felt eye contact make such a difference. He grinned. “Well, that would be a suicide.

Put everything in your shot.”

“What’s the point of this?” Kyle demanded.

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Will shrugged. “No one wanted to pay last time, so the first person to drop out has to buy. Because this is going to be disgusting. Everybody ready?” He sat across the circle from me instead of next to me.

This was ridiculous, but I grabbed a die and pleaded with fate for the schnapps.

“Roll!”

I rolled a two. Lime juice. I grabbed the lime and filled my shot glass a third full then added the club soda. Kyle swore—he got a three. Tabasco sauce. Will and Mara had mustard. Chris got the schnapps.

“Okay, go!” We tossed back the shots. Mine wasn’t bad, but Kyle gagged and Will and Mara nearly choked. Kyle stood it for five seconds before running to the kitchen. He came back swigging out of the milk jug.

“Hey!” Will yelled. “Use a glass!”

“No time.” Kyle wiped his mouth on his sleeve and sat back down. “My whole mouth is burning. That was disgusting.”

“No spitting it out, or you lose,” Will warned. “Again. Roll!”

I rolled four. Mustard. Chris got a six—the suicide shot.

Mara looked sympathetic, but Kyle laughed and pounded the table.

We all watched as Chris mixed Tabasco sauce, lime juice, soy sauce, schnapps, and mustard with club soda in the shot glass.

The glass was brimming with a fizzy, murky red-brown liquid that looked like some kind of disease-causing potion, and I could only imagine what Aunt Shelly would say if she knew what her son was about to ingest.

“You can back out if you buy us all beer,” Will said. “You don’t have to do it.”

“I can take it,” Chris said. “You guys ready?”

We raised our shots. Mine was a lumpy, foaming yellow.

“Go!” Will yelled.

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Chris gagged and I nearly did. Fizzy mustard tasted about like I expected. Chris looked like he’d just eaten garden fertil-izer. “That tastes like sin. Sin in a glass.”

I couldn’t believe he’d done it. Apparently Chris and his friends did whatever Will told them to.

“Okay, booze round!” Will poured us all a straight shot of schnapps and I tossed it back. The butterscotch still tasted faintly of mustard, but the sticky sweet was blessed relief.

Three more rounds, interrupted by a second round of schnapps shots, went down before Mara caved when she rolled a six. “Nothing’s worth drinking that. I’ll buy next time,” she said.No one really wanted more schnapps—it was a little like drinking pie—so the boys pulled out the Wii, but that only lasted about half an hour before they felt sick. “Jumping up and down with fizzy Tabasco in my stomach is like the second worst idea I’ve ever had,” Chris said, collapsing on the couch beside me.“Yeah, well, you drank it,” I said. My own stomach was a little queasy, too.

“And that one was the worst.” Nevertheless, when it was his turn again, Chris got up to play, changing out with Will.

“Sure you don’t want to play?” Will asked. He sat half a cushion away from me.

“I’m not good at sports, real or virtual.” Chris and Mara were now completely absorbed in some kind of kickball game.

My aim and coordination were decent, but I couldn’t jump or throw to save my life.

“So, tell me something about yourself.” He leaned back on the couch and stretched his shoulders.

I watched, in spite of myself. “Like what kind of something?”

“Anything. Like, what’s your favorite thing to do with an 166

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afternoon?”

I turned sideways a little and crossed my legs. His glance darted down to my legs but then right back up to my face.

“Either go to the pool and bake in the sun,” I said, “or watch an old movie in my room.” With Marcus.

He frowned. “Darn it. I was hoping you were cool. How old of a movie are we talking here? Please don’t say silent films.”

I laughed. “Not silent films. A few black and whites. Really, it’s not just old ones. It’s the great films. Classics. Like
The God-father
and
Schindler’s List
.” I pulled one of the grungy throw pillows onto my lap. Kyle cheered Chris on, but Chris wasn’t playing nearly as well as I knew he could. He was letting Mara win.Will leaned toward me a little. “So what’s your guilty pleasure movie?”

I rolled my eyes. There was no question, but not very many people knew.
“Raiders of the Lost Ark.
What about you? Do you have a favorite movie?”

“I like pretty much all sitcoms.
The Office
is sheer genius.
Arrested Development
.
Parks and Rec
. I don’t catch much TV, but when I can, that’s what I go for.”

I hadn’t gotten into television shows much. Chris yelled when he scored and Mara sat down looking glum. Even Chris going easy on her wasn’t enough to help, apparently. I knew how she felt.

Will laid his arm along the back of the couch and leaned toward me. “So,” he said. “You said to try asking without flirting, and that means all my usual cards are out. But I really would like to take you out on a date sometime.”

I didn’t really get why. “How come?”

He looked me straight in the eyes and grinned like I’d just said the silliest thing in the world. “Because I like you.”

Ballsy. I looked down, playing with my nails and trying to 167

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hide my smile. “I’m not a huge fan of dates.” A date wasn’t a relationship, and dates could be fun, right?

“You can’t say that until you’ve been on one with me.”

Screw it. Marcus was off meeting Sylvia’s dad and making her official on Facebook and taking her to dinner in the city.

I’d tried everything else, so I might as well try this. “I guess one couldn’t hurt.”

“Awesome.” He grinned. “How’s tomorrow sound? I promise I won’t make you do tabasco shots.”

Tomorrow was too soon. I hadn’t entirely made up my mind I would say yes until that moment. “How about Saturday?”

We got home barely in time for dinner. Chris grabbed my arm as Will pulled out of the driveway. “Hold on.” When he turned at the stop sign, Chris said, “I heard him ask you out.”

My face warmed. Blushing gave me away, every time. “I think everyone did.”

“Well.” Chris cleared his throat. “He’s a decent guy. But he’s kind of a player.”

His awkward expression made me smile. “Are you trying to warn me or something?”

He shrugged. “He’s always kinda been that way. Nothing sticks. He gets all serious about some new girl, and then two months later, he loses interest. Maybe he wouldn’t be that way with you, but I thought you should know.”

I nodded. “It’s just a date. I don’t want it to be serious or anything.” We turned toward the house. “Why does he live on his own? Do you know why he dropped out?”

Chris shrugged again and walked ahead of me up the driveway. “His dad got remarried. I think they kicked him out or something, and then he had to work to pay rent.”

I knew the story behind it wasn’t going to be a happy one, but what shitty parents. I might have seen my parents making 168

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out one too many times, but at least they hadn’t cost me my diploma.

Marcus was home without Sylvia, for once, helping the girls with their homework at the table and doing that thing where he stared at me but kept his face so blank I couldn’t tell what he was thinking. I hated it and he knew it.

I missed him. I missed his voice and his laugh and the way he used to look at me. But I was angry at him, too. People, it turned out, seemed perfect until you needed them, or they moved away and you wanted them to try harder too, but they couldn’t or wouldn’t. And here I was left dealing with all his little barbs and flaws that he’d left out for me to trip over.

To avoid seeing Sylvia in case she came over, Kelsey and I went for ice cream to Todd’s, but because the world is a cruel and heartless place, my break from my ex’s new girlfriend was short-lived. Marcus and Sylvia showed up not fifteen minutes later.

I waved to Sylvia and she came over to our picnic table.

“Hey, I just realized I don’t have your number,” I said. The evening was warm but not stifling, and there was a line in front of the walk-by pickup window.

“Oh.” Her eyes widened a little, and she smiled. “Here, I’ll text you mine and you can reply with yours.” Her long nails clicked on her phone.

Marcus’s shoved his hands into his pockets and stared at me, but I didn’t look at him. “Thanks,” I said when her text came in. “We should hang out more.”

“We should.” She smiled again. Glossy coral lips, professionally whitened teeth. Guaranteed, those lips had touched Marcus. I turned away from her, but then turned back.

“Are you sure you didn’t know Ellie very well? Because she mentioned you in an email. It sounded like you two were pretty good friends.” Her lie about it was still bothering me, and if 169

How we Fall

there was something Sylvia knew, I had to know. I’d already let Ellie down too many times. I wouldn’t be giving up any more chances to make that right.

Sylvia paled. “She did? What did she say?”

“Not much.”

She moved closer to me and bent down. “What did she say?”

I moved back so she wasn’t in my face. “She mentioned a sleepover.”

She straightened up. “That’s it?”

“So you were friends, then?”

She walked back toward Marcus. “No. Not really.”

Marcus put a hand on her arm. “Let’s go to the store for ice cream instead. We can get toppings and do sundaes.” The reference wasn’t lost on me.

And for some reason, she’d been awfully concerned about that email.

Sylvia let Marcus pull her away, and Kelsey turned to me. “I always thought your cousin was gay.”

I choked on my spoon of mint chip. “Gay?” I could swear in front of a judge and jury that Marcus was not gay.

She shrugged. “I flirted with him all through freshman year.

Asked him to the Sadie Hawkins dance. He said no. I’ve never seen him interested in any girl ever, so I figured he was into guys.”

Freshman year. Right after I’d moved in with his family.

Kelsey wound a springy blonde curl around her finger.

“Now I’m insulted that he wouldn’t go out with me. I hope it’s not weird that I’m talking about your cousin, but those hands?

His shoulders? Yes, please.”

“It’s a little weird.” Just not for the reason she thought.

“Maybe I’ll have to keep trying.” She licked her chocolate cone. “He’s got the cutest smile.”

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He did. An unselfconscious, whole-face kind of grin. I hadn’t seen it in a while.

So I didn’t have to talk to keep talking to Kelsey about how cute my cousin was, I checked my email.

Something new from Travis, finally. As strange as it was to be talking about Ellie to someone who hadn’t known her, it was also a relief.

That’s too bad about your cousin being a jerk. At the risk of
sounding old, I’m going to tell you that we men do eventually grow
out of that. Did you guys have some kind of falling out?