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He addressed the envelope and shoved it into the outgoing mail, burying it under Hound's letter to his brother and Elias's latest monograph to his grandmother. When he turned around Tor was leaning on the doorframe looking at him.

"You get it done?" he asked.

Jake grinned. "Finally." The grin faded and he added, "It's hard, you know? Trying to balance too much at once with just enough?"

Tor walked to him and put a hand on his waist. "Yeah. I bet it is." He kissed him softly.

"You tell her about me?"

Jake kissed him back, less softly. "Yeah. One thing I didn't even debate about. She wants me, she gets us both."

Tor looked surprised, then stunned. His expression finally settled on the one Jake called

‘Oh, I am so getting laid’ and he pulled Jake a little closer. "Didn't have to."

"Yeah, I did," Jake said, his voice getting hoarse.

Tor kissed him, the hand on his waist slipping around to the small of Jake's back, holding him close. Tor had just started to grind against him when the kitchen door opened and Hound came in.

"Oops, sorry guys," he said, walking quickly past them. "You really should put a sign up or somethin'. You'll give Elias a heart attack."

Jake watched Hound disappear around the corner into the living room. "He's never gonna forgive us for that thing at the riverbed, is he? He blushes every time he sees us."

Tor shrugged and licked Jake's neck. "He'll deal. But the kid has a point. Bedroom?"

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Jake forgot about Hound and groaned softly, pushing Tor back. "It's that way."

Tor walked backwards, arms still looped around Jake. "Know where it is, Taggart. Just making sure you don't strip me naked in the kitchen."

Jake kissed him again, pushing him against the wall. "Oops. Thought we were at our door," he said, one hand going to Tor's fly. "Besides, you didn't complain last time I started somethin' in the kitchen."

"Wasn't anyone…oh, yeah, like that…home then and it was the middle of the night, not the day. Oh shit. Jake. Bedroom."

"It's over there," Jake teased, not moving.

Tor got a determined look in his eye and Jake froze. Too far. Now he was really going to get it.

Tor pushed him back by the shoulders and slammed him into the wall on the other side of the hall. Jake barely had time to regain his balance before Tor had his jeans open and one hand wrapped around Jake's cock, pumping him firmly.

"Now. You wanna blow here in the hall where any of them can see, or you wanna go lie on the bed like a good cowboy and let me do you right?"

Jake didn't even have to think about it. "Bed."

"Right then." Tor let him go and stepped back, pointing the way.

Jake went, happy he knew the right answers to the really hard questions.

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Chapter Twenty-five

Over the next two weeks Jake felt himself grow more and more out of sorts. The work was slow around the ranch and he had more time on his hands than he really liked; more time to think and more time to wonder why he hadn't heard back from 'Lissa yet.

Tor didn't say anything about it, just made sure that Jake didn't have time to sit still for too long. They rode in the evenings until it got too cool or dark, or they played with the Lego. Some nights Tor would just make him talk, about the ranch, or the upcoming holidays, or when Kip would finally ask Beth to marry him.

Jake appreciated it, but he still waited for the mail each day with growing depression. He didn't realize he would feel the rejection so strongly. He'd gone almost twenty years without a family, he thought he should be used to it by now.

He was just heading into the barn to take River out for some exercise when the Boss came out of the big house with the familiar brown envelopes in his hand. Jake watched him walk toward the bunkhouse and pass the envelopes over to Hound, still not wanting to hope and having to anyway. With a sigh he headed back to the bunkhouse; he might really need to take River out if he got that sick, sad feeling again.

When he went in, though, Hound was just sorting them out and he absently handed a thick envelope to Jake. "Here you go, Jake," he said, wandering out of the kitchen with his own mail.

Jake sat at the kitchen table, barely glancing up as Tor came in. "I got mail," he said softly.

Tor stood behind him and rested a hand on his shoulder.

Jake dumped the envelope out on the table. Two catalogues and a thick envelope from

'Lissa. Without a word he picked up the envelope and went to their room. Tor followed for a couple of steps, then Elias called him. Jake looked back and got an apologetic look followed by an encouraging smile. "I'll be in as soon as I can. Besides, you don't need me hangin' over your shoulder while you read."

Jake nodded. "But you'll be in?"

"Of course."

Jake settled himself on the bed and tore open the envelope. A letter from 'Lissa. One from Cath. And one from Jacob, folded three times and addressed to 'Uncle Jake' in pencil crayon. Jake blinked and his heart lurched. He put it to the side, picking up Cath's letter first.

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Dear Jake,

I just wanted to send a short note to let you know that I read the one you sent to 'Lissa.

Love you, big brother. Never stopped.

I don't care if you're with a man. That sort of thing has never been an issue for me–I'm
the strange one in this family. Mamma and Daddy were always set against it, and James
too…but I never saw the point. So you'll get no hassle from me. As long as he's a good
man and treats you right, he's welcome.

The other? Was a long long time ago, hon. You've made the changes you had to and stuck
by them. That's the end of it.

I would love it if you would call me, Jake. Want to get to know you.

Cath

Jake read it three times before setting it aside, and even as he unfolded the one from

'Lissa he kept glancing at it, like he thought it would go up in flames. Maybe he should just call Tor and make sure it said what he thought it did. He shook his head and looked at the letter in his hands.

Dear Jake,

Sorry this one took time to reach you–I had to wait for Cath's to get here, and Jacob
really wanted his say as well.

Since you're being so honest I guess I better be, too.

Can't say I'm surprised you went to prison. You were heading that way, I know. I am
sorry it happened though–no one likes to think that their brother went to such an awful
place. And I can't help thinking that you're leaving something out, just 'cause it seems like
a long time to serve for the crime, but I'm willing to let that go.

I'll let it go because it was so damn long ago and you aren't the same person now. You
aren't the boy who left us. And I'm glad of that–the boy who left was the one who did that
bad thing, and I'm glad you grew out of it, got your eyes opened. I'm glad you got the
help you needed, even if I am sorry we couldn't be that help.

I'm glad you're a good man, Jake.

I'll admit to having a harder time dealing with you being gay. I was raised by the same
people you were, so you know the prejudices I'm fighting here. I am fighting them,
though, Jake. I lost you once over this, I'll not do it a second time. It may take me a bit of
work, but I'll not be cutting you off from me or my boy because you're in love with a man.

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I trust you when you say your Tor is a good man. I'm glad you have someone like that.

Someone you can count on.

I told Jacob, and he's really what set me right about this. He just kind of blinked at me
and said, "So? When can I see him?"

God, I love that kid.

Anyway. If you're still willing to try to patch our family together we're ready for you.

We'll meet you more than halfway, Jake. We've missed you and we'd be damn fools to
give you up on purpose.

The holidays are coming up in a few weeks and the better part of me is crying out to
invite you for Christmas–Tor too–but the smarter part is telling me it's too soon and that
Christmas is stressful enough. Would you be willing to see me and Cath and Jacob in the
spring? Maybe the five of us can meet somewhere for a long weekend.

Call me. Anytime.

'Lissa

Jake set the letter down on top of Cath's, his hands shaking. They wanted him. His sisters wanted him back. All the years he'd tried to push them out of his mind, all the times he'd felt angry and alone ate at him, made him want to scream. He picked up the last letter and unfolded it, letting two photos drop into his lap.

The first was a studio shot, looked like a school picture. Jacob's wheat coloured hair stuck up in the back and his shirt was smudged. He had a wide, beaming grin that showed the very devil and his blue eyes glittered with laughter. He didn't look much like Jake remembered 'Lissa, but he could see some of James in him, around the cheekbones. He could see himself in Jacob's brow and hair and ears.

The second was 'Lissa and Jacob together, sitting on a couch, smiling happily. Jacob's hair was still sticking up, though his shirt was cleaner. He was a scrawny little thing, and

'Lissa was, too. She was slim and had long dark curly hair, blue eyes glowing with happiness. She looked…wonderful. She had some of their mother in her, but that was just fine. She had more of their grandmother than Jake had ever thought, and he could see three generations of his kin right there in her face.

He didn't bother wiping the tears from his cheek when he started to read Jacob's letter.

Dear Uncle Jake,

Momma told me you're alive and I think that's just so cool. Like you were gone and now
you're ours again. It made Momma cry, but she says that's because she's happy. Is that
weird?

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She also told me you did a bad thing a long time ago and you paid the price for it. She
says that it didn't matter anymore, that you growed up. Good for you.

Momma seemed a little upset to find out you have a boyfriend, but I told her that Kelly at
school has three dads and it works out fine for her. She had a Ma and a Daddy first, then
they got a divau divors split up and then she has a Ma and a Dad, and a Daddy and a
Da. She says her Daddy and Da don't fight at all and they look silly when they kiss and
stuff, but other than that it's good.

Can you ask Tor if I can call him Uncle Tor? Are you guys sort of married? I'd like to, if
he says it's okay.

Can we see you in the spring?

Love

Jacob

Jake was curled around his pillow when Tor came in.

"Shit. What did they say?" Tor sounded near panicked at the tears.

Jake sat up. "They said–hell. Jacob wants to call you Uncle Tor."

Tor stared at him. "He what now?"

Jake nodded happily. "He wants to know if we're–" he reached for the letter and quoted,

"sort of married. And he wants to call you Uncle Tor if you say it's okay."

Tor sat down on the bed looking shell-shocked. "Uh, yeah. That'd be cool." He looked at Jake again. "So, it's good?"

"It's good." Jake leaned up and kissed him. "It's good."

Tor kissed him back. "I got mail too. From Becky."

"Yeah?" Jake asked, looking for another kiss.

"She wants us to go for Christmas. My mother wants us there."

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Chapter Twenty-six

Tor had already threatened to turn the truck around and deliver him back to the ranch twice so Jake just stared out the window and bit his lip as they got closer to Texas. It wasn't that he didn't want to go to Becky's for Christmas, he did. He just wasn't sure if he was up to meeting Tor's mother.

He was lost in thought, contemplating the amount of stuff they'd brought for a four day trip, and deliberately not thinking about what he would say to Tor's mom, when the truck veered sharply and Tor hit the brakes, stopping at the side of the road.

"Gonna tell me what the problem is, Taggart? Getting too far to just turn around now.

You don't want to do this I gotta know now." His tone was far gentler than his words, and when Jake turned his head to meet Tor's eyes he found them to be even softer than his tone.

"Not that. Want to do this; wouldn't have come this far if I didn't."

"So? Talk to me, cowboy."

Jake leaned on the door and sighed. "It's stupid."

Tor didn't say anything, didn't move. Traffic passed them by and Jake sighed again. "Just that…well, last year I was alone. Really alone, just me and the Boss's family at Christmas. Been that way for a lot of years, you know? Now I got two sisters, a nephew who calls you uncle, and I'm about to meet your sister, your niece, and your mom–which, yeah, scares the hell out of me." He took a breath. "See? Dumb."

Tor smiled and leaned over, kissing him softly. "Not dumb. Lot of changes. You forgot one though."

Jake frowned slightly. "I did?"

"Yeah. You got me, too. And you don't need to handle any of this alone."

Jake didn't know what to say so he kissed Tor hard and let it go.

Meeting Becky was easy. She said hi and got as far as a polite 'Nice to meet you' and then the room was taken over by Susie. Jake thought that all meetings should have an energetic six year old on hand, just to take the edge off.

Two hours later Susie was still showing Jake and Tor all her things and talking non–stop.

She'd shown them their room, the tree and the presents and was just starting to tell them about the food they were going to have when Becky finally picked her up and said,

"We're going to go get Gram now. Shush so I can talk to Uncle Tor for a second."