I Can Make You Hot! (2 page)

I was definitely in danger of developing an eating disorder, and what saved me during those years was running. I ran almost every day, mainly to keep my weight down and my spirits high. I ran, even when everyone else was telling me what I should do to look better. My self-esteem was at a low point, but running always made me feel good physically.

It all came to a head when I was pregnant with my first daughter. Most people feel confident and settled when they get pregnant, but I was the wife of a famous fashion photographer who was also the international creative director of
Elle
and worked with supermodels every day. There I was tipping the scales at 190 and surrounded by models who were desperate to get thinner as I was getting wider. I was alone on “Pregnancy Island” and I felt awkward, unfulfilled. I was wearing men’s shirts when everyone around me was talking about hot abs on supermodels.

In case you think I shouldn’t have been feeling so sorry for myself, I hasten to say that I’ve been privileged to know and work with some pretty amazing people, and one of them came to my rescue and helped snap me out of the pregnancy blues. Calvin Klein said he wanted to make me a few dresses and invited me to come in for a fitting. Before we got started, I was sitting across from him in his office when out of nowhere I started to tear up. I was overwhelmed by my ever-widening waistline, hormonally challenged and scared about being a new mom in the modeling world, and Calvin was not only a designer but also a dad. I knew he would understand what I was feeling.

He was totally focused on me while his staff waved their hands, desperately trying to get his attention. Calvin Klein’s new ad campaign featured what looked like teenage models in provocative positions. The world was offended and upset, but Calvin knew the campaign would sell more underwear and jeans than a pretty girl any day. He is a brilliant designer and a marketing maverick. But I digress. The irony, which was lost on me at the time, is that while I was crying about being wide he was in the process of defending an infamous, industry-changing ad campaign featuring skinny underage kids. His staff raced him out the back door while a team of men and women dressed entirely in black came in to take my measurements. When they asked me my size, I said “wide.”

A few weeks later a black garment bag arrived with a long purple slip dress cut on the bias for maximum growth potential, a low-cut black sheath dress, and a long riding-style coat. I realized then that he wanted me to have clothes that would allow me to love the way I looked throughout my pregnancy. Thank you, Calvin Klein, for taking me from wide to HOT. Reflecting back, I wish I’d been able to recognize then, as I do now, that pregnancy is smokin’ HOT.

It wasn’t until after I’d had my two daughters that my perspective started to shift. Instead of being focused on my waist size, I began to focus on my girls and my writing. My career was starting to blossom, and possibilities I had never even imagined began to arise. I was thinking about what
could
be, not about what I wanted to change about me. I had regained my inner confidence, which ultimately led to the ending of my marriage. My divorce from Gilles had nothing to do with him and everything to do with where I was in my own life. To this day, we have a healthy and happy relationship.

So, whatever you’re going through or have been through in terms of your health and self-esteem, I’ve been there. I’ve tried every diet (
die
with a
t
), every fast, and every juice cleanse—and each time I’ve gone right back to my real body weight, which I now love no matter what anyone says. If I could do that, if I could endure all the pressure and come out the other side, so can you.

I don’t want to pretend that I’m “just like you.” To do that would be disingenuous, and you wouldn’t believe me anyway. But I may be more like you than you think. My hair may look ready for Victoria’s Secret, but my values are still Midwestern. I’m raising two daughters, I cook for them and for myself (and, no, I don’t have a personal chef—except when my kids do the cooking), and I want to instill in them the Midwestern values I grew up with. When I joined the cast of
Real Housewives of New York City,
fans of the program and my Twitter followers asked me what I do to stay fit, which made me realize that I do have information to share and that people really do want to know. To answer all their questions I created the hashtag #KKBfit, which has since become the inspiration for this book.

Everyone has the capacity to be HOT. I don’t have any special DNA that makes me hotter than the next woman. But I have learned lessons and acquired a few tricks that will help you to gain the confidence to be your absolute hottest. And, after all, why wouldn’t you want to be HOT? What’s the alternative? Being “not so hot”?

For a long time I was reluctant to share my weight-loss stories. I was flattered that anyone would be interested in how I eat and live, but I’m basically shy (believe it or not), and I also didn’t really think people would believe me. I thought they’d just look at me as I am now and assume I was “born that way.” The truth is that I’ve worked hard to create the balance I believe is the only way to be healthy, happy, and ultimately HOT. I wanted to dispel the mistaken idea that skinny is hot, and overexercised is healthy.

I’ve been photographed as a skinny bag of anxiety-starved bones after Season 3 of the
Real Housewives of New York City
. I never in a million years thought I’d become the victim of a story line. But the press went to town with an assumption, and I was a mess as a result: insecure, nervous, and scared. To combat all the negativity, I ate well, even though I kept getting skinnier, and I didn’t give up. I continued eating well, loving my kids, family, and friends, sleeping well, and smiling whenever I could to anyone, anywhere.

During Season 4, I was so grounded and felt so comfortable and proud of myself that I became the voice of reason on the show. Who would have thought I’d survive the wrath of mean girls? So, if you’re going through a divorce, being sued, or having your integrity defamed by strangers on national television, I’ve been there and I survived while the whole world watched me. Today, I’m confident enough to tell my story. Sometimes in life you have to endure a speed bump. I love those who survive and do it looking HOT. We make our own choices about how to deal with adversity, so my advice is, any time you fall victim to bad thoughts, eat some dehydrated fruit, drink a glass of raspberry-infused lemonade, take a spin on your bicycle, smile all the way through life, and never for a moment think you are alone because I’m doing the same thing, probably on the exact same day you are.

So let’s get HOT together, day-by-day, step-by-step, meal-by-meal, by eating well, sleeping well, feeling good, and having fun. I’ve divided this book into seven days, with something different to focus on and work on each day. I urge you to make notes as you go along, either in the book itself or in a little notebook to use as your own personal guide. Jotting down ideas as they pop into your head is the best way to process them and be sure that they don’t leave again before you’ve had a chance to commit them to long-term memory. Then, if you’ve made a mistake, when you go back and see it there on paper, you’ll remind yourself not to do it again. Or, as I like to say, you’ll avoid getting bitten by the same food dog twice! And, conversely, if something really worked for you, you’ll remember to do it again—and again, until it becomes part of your normal, everyday lifestyle. It isn’t hard. In fact, my plan is very simple:

1. Exercise every day. No excuses.

2. Make healthy food choices and eat well six days a week.

3. Make Sunday your Funday and eat whatever you want. If you’ve been making good choices and moving your body the other six days, you get to “fall off the wagon” once a week.

By the time you’ve read through the book, you’ll have a whole new plan for eating and living well for the rest of your life. I think you’ll be surprised to learn that some of the foods you thought you should
never
eat (such as starchy carbs and sugar) are actually the ones you should be eating every day. I might as well admit it right now: I eat carbs and sugar all the time. I never deny myself rice or sweets, but I try to make good carb choices, and I don’t overdo. Every single time I’ve tried to do something different, such as give up carbs or give up meat, my body rebelled. Your body has a voice (and I don’t mean your stomach grumbling); you just need to listen to the signals it’s sending and respond appropriately.

I’m going to be sharing with you how to do what I do, and I can guarantee that if you follow my life plan you
will
be
smokin’ HOT
from your head to your toes and from your heart to your skin, inside and out!

Monday: Make a List–Plan and Prepare!

To me, living well is the only option. What, after all, is the only alternative? Living badly? Who aspires to living badly? I want you to live well, and that’s going to take some planning.

What are your goals for yourself? If you’re going to make changes in your life, you need to have a plan, you need to prepare, and you need to take the time to get it right—so that you don’t wind up wasting your time. This is my plan, and from now on it’s going to be yours. Monday is going to be the day you make a HOT plan and prepare for the rest of your week. Let’s get started together!

What are you going to be eating this week? I know we haven’t talked about specific meals yet (we’ll be doing that on Wednesday). For now, you just need to know that planning your meals in advance and shopping for the foods you’re going to need for the rest of the week will help to keep you on track. If what you need or want to eat isn’t there when you want it, you’re likely to substitute something a lot less healthy and satisfying just because it’s staring you in the face.

Another positive side effect of this is that once you’ve finished your food shopping you’ll know how much money you have left over to spend on other things. And you’re less likely to buy things you don’t really need—so you might have some extra cash for a pedicure. This isn’t just about budgeting your food; it’s about budgeting your life.

Kelly’s Cardinal Rule

This is not something you don’t know, but—never go shopping when you’re hungry. That’s when you’re most likely to make bad choices and find yourself finishing a whole bag of Peanut M&M’s while you’re surfing the vegetable aisle. You don’t want to be that person who is snacking while you’re shopping. That’s not hot—period.

Staples I keep in my house

Snacks

Almonds

Dehydrated mangos, blueberries, pineapple

Unbuttered, unsalted popcorn

Kale chips

Organic fruit snacks

Olives

Wasabi-roasted green peas

Yogurt-covered goji berries

Breads, Cereals, Flour, And Grains

Bran and whole wheat cereals

Brown and white rice

Cornbread mix

Lentils

Organic brownie mix

Pancake mix

Rice crackers

Taco shells

Whole grain croutons

Whole wheat pasta

I’m not a big fan of nuts in general, but I do love almonds, and they have many health benefits. They’re packed with nutrients and monounsaturated fats that help keep your heart healthy.

Olives may be little balls of fat, but they’re full of health-promoting, omega-9 monounsaturated fatty acids as well as vitamin E and flavonoids, which are potent antioxidants. Plus, black olives have more iron than any other food and there is research to show that olives and olive oil may be effective in the prevention and treatment of arthritis, asthma, and some types of cancer. They also satisfy your need for salt and combat cravings.