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Authors: Mardy Grothe

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RICK BAYAN

God is a metaphor for that which transcends
all levels of intellectual thought. It's as simple as that.

JOSEPH CAMPBELL

Goodness is the only investment that never fails.

HENRY DAVID THOREAU

Gratitude is the heart's memory.

FRENCH PROVERB

Habit is a cable; we weave a thread of it each day,
and at last we cannot break it.

HORACE MANN

Happiness makes up in height for what it lacks in length.

ROBERT FROST

This was the title of a 1942 poem that figuratively captured the allure of happiness. Ralph Waldo Emerson is often credited with another classic on the subject, but so far I have been unable to find the original observation in any of his published works: “Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.”

 

Honesty is the first chapter of the book of wisdom.

THOMAS JEFFERSON

A house is a machine for living in.

LE CORBUSIER

A hunch is creativity trying to tell you something.

FRANK CAPRA

Ignorance is the night of the mind.

CONFUCIUS

Imagination is intelligence with an erection.

VICTOR HUGO

This is the only R-rated observation to be found in this chapter, and some may find it inappropriate. But even if you do, you must admit that it stimulates quite an image. A more socially acceptable—and also exceptional—observation comes from Joseph Joubert: “Imagination is the eye of the soul.”

 

Inspiration could be called inhaling the memory of an act never experienced.

NED ROREM

Jazz is the music of the body.

ANAÏS NIN

Journalism is literature in a hurry.

MATTHEW ARNOLD

Justice is truth in action.

BENJAMIN DISRAELI

Is not a kiss the very autograph of love?

HENRY THEOPHILUS FINCK

This observation comes from Finck's 1887 book
Romantic Love and Personal Beauty
. Finck, a nineteenth-century music critic who was also interested in philosophy and the classics, may have inspired a famous Mae West line: “A man's kiss is his signature.” There have been many other wonderful kiss observations, but another potentially definitive one is this classic from Edmond Rostand's
Cyrano de Bergerac
: “'Tis a secret told to the mouth instead of to the ear.”

 

Laughter is the sun that drives winter from the human face.

VICTOR HUGO

Letters are expectation packed in an envelope.

SHANA ALEXANDER

A line is a dot that went for a walk.

PAUL KLEE

Memory is a crazed woman that hoards colored rags and throws away food.

AUSTIN O'MALLEY

The point is that we forget the essential and remember—often with great clarity—the tantalizing trivia. Other deserving candidates on this subject include:

“Our memories are card indexes consulted and then put back in disorder, by authorities whom we do not control.”
Cyril Connolly

Memory is the personal journalism of the soul.”
Richard Schickel

 

The mind, of course, is just what the brain does for a living.

SHARON BEGLEY

Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.

H. G. WELLS

Music is the wine that fills the cup of silence.

ROBERT FRIPP

Nostalgia is a seductive liar.

GEORGE BALL

Opportunity is missed by most people
because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.

THOMAS ALVA EDISON

Henry J. Kaiser said similarly: “Trouble is only opportunity in work clothes.”

 

Passion makes the best observations
and the most wretched conclusions.

JEAN PAUL RICHTER

Another favorite, from Ralph Waldo Emerson, is this: “Passion, though a bad regulator, is a powerful spring.”

 

The past is a foreign country; they do things differently there.

L. P. HARTLEY

On the same subject, Maxim Gorky wrote in
The Lower Depths
(1903): “In the carriages of the past you can't go anywhere.”

 

Peanut butter is
paté
for children.

BRIGITTE BARDOT

The piano is a monster that screams when you touch its teeth.

ANDRÉS SEGOVIA

Popularity? It's glory's small change.

VICTOR HUGO

Poverty is the mother of crime.

MARCUS AURELIUS

A prayer, in its simplest definition,
is merely a wish turned heavenward.

PHILLIPS BROOKS

Procrastination is the thief of time.

EDWARD YOUNG

A promise is an IOU.

ROBERT HALF

A proverb is anonymous human history compressed to the size of a seed.

STEFAN KANFER

If I were personally to define religion,
I would say that it is a bandage that man has invented
to protect a soul made bloody by circumstance.

THEODORE DREISER

Research is the process of going up alleys to see if they are blind.

MARSTON BATES

A riot is at bottom the language of the unheard.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.

Rock and roll is the hamburger that ate the world.

PETER YORK

Scientists are peeping toms at the keyhole of eternity.

ARTHUR KOESTLER

Skepticism is the chastity of the intellect.

GEORGE SANTAYANA

The point is that we should apply the admonition about keeping one's chastity to our mental as well as our physical life. That is, we should retain our skepticism as long as possible and avoid giving it up too early—or too easily—to a seductive idea.

 

Slang is language that takes off its coat, spits on its hands, and goes to work.

CARL SANDBURG

Tact is after all a kind of mind-reading.

SARAH ORNE JEWETT

Tears are the safety valve of the heart
when too much pressure is laid on it.

ALBERT SMITH

That great, growling engine of change—technology.

ALVIN TOFFLER

Thought is the seed of action.

RALPH WALDO EMERSON

Time is a dressmaker specializing in alterations.

FAITH BALDWIN

Toleration is the best religion.

VICTOR HUGO

Truth is error burned up.

NORMAN O. BROWN

Some other close contenders in this category include the following:

“The color of truth is gray.”
André Gide

“Truth is a fruit which should not be plucked until it is ripe.”
Voltaire

“The best mind-altering drug is truth.”
Jane Wagner
(for Lily Tomlin)

 

Twilight: A time of pause when nature changes her guard.

HOWARD THURMAN

Virtual reality is just air guitar writ large.

ROBERT J. SAWYER

Virtue is the beauty of the soul.

SOCRATES

The voice is a second face.

GERARD BAUER

Vulgarity is the garlic in the salad of charm.

CYRIL CONNOLLY

Wine is bottled poetry.

ROBERT LOUIS STEVENSON

A word is a bud attempting to become a twig.

GASTON BACHELARD

Zeal is a volcano, on the peak of which
the grass of indecisiveness does not grow.

KAHLIL GIBRAN

I
n 1977, six years before he was awarded the Nobel Prize for literature, the British writer William Golding was invited to speak to a group of Anglophiles in Lille, France. In his address, he said:

 

Consider a man riding a bicycle.
Whoever he is, we can say three things about him.
We know he got on the bicycle and started to move.
We know that at some point he will stop and get off.
Most important of all, we know that
if at any point between the beginning and the end of his journey
he stops moving and does not get off the bicycle, he will fall off it.
That is a metaphor for the journey through life of any living thing.

 

Golding had been groomed by his parents to become a scientist, but in his second year at Oxford he got the literature bug and abandoned thoughts of a scientific career. Things started off nicely. A year before he graduated
in 1935, he came out with a small volume of verse, making him a published author at age twenty-three.

After graduation, he worked for several years at a series of odd jobs while writing in his spare time, but nothing of importance emerged. In 1940, he joined the Royal Navy and spent the next six years witnessing a host of life-altering sights, including the sinking of the
Bismarck
and the Normandy invasion.

After the war, Golding's view of the world was transformed, and any prior illusions he had held about civilization were gone forever (years later, he would say he had come to the view that “man produces evil as a bee produces honey”). While teaching during the day, he began working at night on a dark, allegorical tale about a group of boys who become stranded on a desert island and slowly degenerate from civilized English schoolboys to savage and vicious brutes. He titled the work
Lord of the Flies
, a literal translation of the Hebrew word for
Beelzebub
. In the novel, it is also the name the boys give to a fly-ridden pig's skull they have mounted on a stake.

Golding began submitting his manuscript to publishers, only to have it rejected twenty-one times, often in the most unmerciful way. One said it was an “absurd and uninteresting fantasy.” Another called it, “Rubbish and dull. Pointless.” The negative reception might have caused a less determined person to give up. But, to return to Golding's earlier metaphor, the forty-three-year old writer stayed on the bicycle and kept pedaling—all the way into literary history.

In all metaphorical language, people try to explain one thing—often an abstract concept like
life
—by relating it to something else. Once a link is established, then all the attributes of the second domain—like
riding a bicycle
—can be applied back to the original domain. Golding could have selected any aspect of bicycling—like dodging potholes or breaking away from the pack—but he went with the idea of simply keeping a bike in motion as his metaphor for life's journey. Albert Einstein did the same thing when he observed:

 

Life is like riding a bicycle.
To keep your balance you must keep moving.

 

When one is trying to help people get a better understanding of something as ethereal as the nature of life, a bicycle metaphor has especially broad appeal. After all, almost everyone has had the experience of riding one, and most people can extrapolate backward from the concrete experience to the abstract idea. The legendary cartoonist Charles M. Schulz had his character Charlie Brown use a bicycle metaphor to lay out yet another great truth of human existence—that most of us don't even come close to living up to our potential. In his trademark way, Schulz had Charlie say it in a witty rather than a preachy way:

 

Life is like a ten-speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.

 

When people are asked to provide examples of a life metaphor, they commonly say things like
life is a beach
, or
life is a bowl of cherries
(from a popular 1930s song), or perhaps
life is a cabaret
(from the 1966 musical and 1972 film). Or maybe they will offer a simile like
life is like a box of chocolates; you never know what you're gonna get
(popularized by the 1994 film
Forrest Gump
). And while these are all perfectly fine examples of metaphorical phrasing, they don't come close to capturing the power of a metaphor to capture essential aspects of human life.

The Scottish writer James M. Barrie is best remembered as the author of
Peter Pan,
one of the most successful plays of all time, but he also wrote highly regarded satires, essays, and novels. One of his early efforts was
The Little Minister
, an 1891 novel that was turned into an 1897 play (and in 1934 adapted into a film version that featured an impressive performance by the young Katharine Hepburn). The original novel contains a line that made a deep impression on me when I first came upon it many decades ago:

 

The life of every man is a diary in which he means to write one story,
and writes another, and his humblest hour is when he compares
the volume as it is with what he vowed to make it.

 

After first reading this in my mid-twenties, I began thinking about my father. I know from a few early conversations that a number of his youthful dreams were never to materialize in his adult years. My dad was a good man, but he always had a sadness in his eyes. And he was an alcoholic from as early as I can remember. I didn't have the maturity—at the time—to understand it all, but a decade or so later an observation attributed to George Bernard Shaw helped put it all in perspective:

 

Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life.

 

When I first read Barrie's diary metaphor, I viewed it as a profound thought expressed beautifully, and I immediately filed it away in a compartment in my brain. I also recorded it on an index card and placed it in a manila folder I had titled
Words to Live By
. Over the years, I returned to the observation many times as I reflected on my own journey.

As the decades have passed, I've come across many other wonderful metaphors for life—and the best ones have never failed to give me pause for reflection:

 

Life is a hospital in which every patient
is possessed by the desire of changing his bed.
One would prefer to suffer near the fire,
and another is certain he would get well if he were by the window.

CHARLES BAUDELAIRE

Life is like a library owned by an author.
In it are a few books which he wrote himself,
but most of them were written for him.

HARRY EMERSON FOSDICK

Life…is painting a picture, not doing a sum.

OLIVER WENDELL HOLMES, JR.

Life is like a game of cards.
The hand that is dealt you represents determinism;
the way you play it is free will.

JAWAHARLAL NEHRU

Life is no “brief candle” to me.
It is a sort of splendid torch which I have got hold of for the moment,
and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible
before handing it on to future generations.

GEORGE BERNARD SHAW

Some came from unexpected sources, like the Charlie Brown quote earlier. Another pleasant surprise came from a person named Brian Dyson. I'd never heard of him, but the image he painted was so vivid—and the sentiment so powerful—I was shocked to discover he was, at the time, CEO of Coca-Cola:

 

Imagine life as a game in which you are juggling some five balls in the air.
You name them—work, family, health, friends, and spirit,
and you're keeping all of these in the air.
You will soon understand that work is a rubber ball.
If you drop it, it will bounce back.
But the other four balls—family, health, friends, and spirit—are made of glass.
If you drop one of these,
they will be irrevocably scuffed, marked, nicked, damaged, or even shattered.
They will never be the same.
You must understand that and strive for balance in your life.

 

Still others came from people I had long admired, like John W. Gardner,
the noted American educator and President Kennedy's secretary of health, education, and welfare. Gardner, a provocative thinker and a beautiful writer, authored several inspiring works, including a 1961 book—titled
Excellence
—that I still take off the shelf from time to time. He once wrote:

 

Life is the art of drawing without an eraser.

 

This observation reminds us that the mistakes we make in life cannot be erased away or treated as if they never happened. Mistakes, along with triumphs, are part of our permanent record—like a transcript from the school of life. Part of the art of living is to recognize that we must learn from the mistakes we will inevitably make, and incorporate that learning into the steps we take as we move forward. It's often called
failing forward.

In the remainder of the chapter, you will find over a hundred observations in which life is likened to such things as a banquet, a college, a mansion, an onion, a violin (and other musical instruments), a superhighway, a painting, a game of chess, and even a roll of toilet paper. No other book in history, to the best of my knowledge, has ever assembled in one chapter more analogies and metaphors on this topic. I hope the compilation will help you gain a deeper appreciation of your life, or help you explain some lessons of life to others.

 

Life is my college. May I graduate well and earn some honors!

LOUISA MAY ALCOTT

Life is a dream for the wise, a game for the fool,
a comedy for the rich, a tragedy for the poor.

SHOLOM ALEICHEM

Life loves to be taken by the lapel and told,
“I am with you kid. Let's go!”

MAYA ANGELOU

Life is like a taxi ride; the meter keeps on ticking,
whether you're getting anywhere, or just standing still.

ANONYMOUS

The point of this saying, which goes back to at least the early years of the twentieth century, is clear: life goes on whether you do something with it, or not. A
taximeter
(notice that it is one word) is a device that calculates fares on the basis of distance traveled and total travel time. The device goes back to ancient Rome, and increasingly sophisticated forms have been used ever since. In the 1800s, they were attached to a horse-driven two-wheeled carriage known as a
cabriolet.
The word
taxicab
is a shortened version of
taximeter cabriolet
.

 

It is best to rise from life as from a banquet, neither thirsty nor drunken.

ARISTOTLE

Aristotle was an advocate of the
golden mean
, the desirable middle course between two ineffective extremes. Here he makes an argument for moderation. The implication is clear—drink enough of life so that, at the end, you won't be thirsting for more; but not so much that you will stagger in a stupor into your grave.

 

Life is a journey, but don't worry, you'll find a parking spot at the end.

ISAAC ASIMOV

Life is always walking up to us and saying, “Come on in, the living's fine,”
and what do we do? Back off and take its picture.

RUSSELL BAKER

Someone told me life is a water wheel. It turns. The trick is to
hold your nose when you're under and not get dizzy when you're up.

JAMES BALDWIN

This passage from
Nobody Knows My Name
(1961) is a nice reminder that we shouldn't get too happy when things go well, or too upset when they don't.

 

Such is life. It is no cleaner than a kitchen;
and if you mean to cook your dinner, you must expect to soil your hands;
the real art is in getting them clean again.

HONORÉ DE BALZAC

Life is a long lesson in humility.

JAMES M. BARRIE

Life is rather like a tin of sardines.
We're all of us looking for the key.

ALAN BENNETT

Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well.

JOSH BILLINGS
(Henry Wheeler Shaw)

Life is a grindstone, and whether it grinds a man down
or polishes him up depends on what he is made of.

JOSH BILLINGS
(Henry Wheeler Shaw)

This observation has been attributed to many others, most notably Jacob M. Braude of
The Speaker's Library
fame. The most clever alteration of the saying comes from Fred Allen: “The world is a grindstone and life is your nose.”

 

Life is much more manageable when thought of as a scavenger hunt
as opposed to a surprise party.

JIMMY BUFFETT

Life itself is the proper binge.

JULIA CHILD

That is, there is no shortage of improper things to binge on, but only one proper one—life itself.

 

Life is like playing a violin solo in public and learning the instrument as one goes on.

SAMUEL BUTLER

Life is like music, it must be composed by ear, feeling, and instinct, not by rule.

SAMUEL BUTLER

Life is like arriving late for a movie, having to figure out what was going on
without bothering everybody with a lot of questions,
and then being unexpectedly called away before you find out how it ends.

JOSEPH CAMPBELL

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