I Saw Her Standing There (20 page)

Try as she might not to think about him, however, he filled her every thought.

Her cell phone rang, and she thought about ignoring it, but she reached for it on the coffee table and saw it was Cameron, so she took the call.

“Hey,” she said.

“How’s it going? Are you back in the city?”

“Just now, yeah. What about you? Still at the lake?”

“No, we got home last night. We took yesterday off, but we had to work today.”

“Good time?”

“Great time, but I didn’t call to talk about me. I want to hear how the rest of your visit went. What did you think of Colton’s mountain?”

“I loved it.”

“You did? Really? I wasn’t expecting you to say that.”

“Why not?”

“Come on, Luce. It’s me you’re talking to. I know how you are about your hot showers and your modern conveniences.”

“That doesn’t mean I can’t do without them for a day or two here and there. It was fun to rough it a little, and it’s not like we did without much. There was hot water and hot coffee and a hot man. What else do I need?”

“He is hot. I’ll give you that.”

“Hands and eyes off. You’ve got your own hot Abbott brother.”

“Yes, I do, and I have no interest in anyone but him. However, I have eyes that work perfectly well, and Colton Abbott is hot.”

“So I’ve noticed. Apparently, every woman in Butler has noticed, too.”

“We heard the weirdest thing when we got back to town yesterday.”

“Let me guess. Something about an accident with the axe?”

“Yes!”

“That might’ve been my doing.”

“Oh, this I’ve got to hear!”

By the time Lucy finished relaying the story of the rumor she’d started, Cameron was laughing so hard she wasn’t making any noise. “Then the food started arriving from his fan club. I’ll bet one of them is there now tending to his festering ‘wound.’” The thought of another woman tending to him made Lucy want to scratch the eyes out of the imaginary woman’s head, which was certainly a first. Jealousy was an entirely new experience.

“Are you really worried about that? How did you guys leave things?”

“No, I’m not really worried. We’re tossing around the BF/GF words.”

“Oh my God! That’s awesome!”

“I’m glad you’re happy about it.”

“Aren’t you?”

“I am . . .”

“Why do I hear a
but
in there?”

“When I’m with him, everything is great. Everything seems possible. The minute we’re apart, I start second-guessing the whole thing and wondering how in the world this could ever really work. Especially after yesterday.”

“What happened yesterday?”

“He showed me his mountain and told me how he makes the syrup. I could really see how much he loves what he does. I mean really, really loves it.”

“I saw that, too, the first time I was there and he showed me the sugarhouse and everything.”

“That’s his life, Cameron. His calling. He wouldn’t be
him
without it. And I can’t leave my dad and Emma and Simone. Not to mention the business . . . I just can’t.”

“I know,” Cam said with a sigh. “I told Will that this weekend. I’m sorry it’s all so messy.”

“It is what it is.”

“Do you love him, Luce?”

“Oh God, don’t ask me that after I just told you how hopeless it is.”

“That’s the most important question. Why wouldn’t I ask it?”

“I don’t know if I love him. How am I supposed to know that?”

“Want to hear the questions I asked myself when I was trying to figure out how I felt about Will?”

“Sure. Why not?”

“Is he all I think about? Can I not wait to spend more time with him? And is it impossible to keep my hands to myself when he’s around?”

To her eternal mortification, Lucy broke down into gut-wrenching sobs.

“Aw, shit, Luce. I wish I was there so I could hug you.”

“I wish you were, too.”

“It might seem too easy for me to say it’s all going to be fine, but it will be. If it’s meant to be, you guys will figure it out just like we did.”

“I can’t see that happening for us.” Lucy wiped the dampness from her face. “This is so not me. Crying over a guy. Ugh.”

Cameron, that bitch, laughed. “Welcome to the club, my friend.”

“What club? What’re you talking about?”

“It’s
love
, and it’s wonderful, maddening, frustrating, amazing . . .”

“I think you’ve been spending too much time with Will and his magic wand to be objective.”

“Perhaps,” Cameron said with a chuckle. “His wand is quite magical—and never more so than this weekend. There must be something in the water at that lake house.”

New tears fell from Lucy’s eyes when memories of Colton’s magic wand chose that moment to remind her of the bliss she’d known in his arms. “Stop.”

“I’ve been where you are, Luce,” Cameron said softly. “Everything seems hopeless except for what you feel for him. I get it. The best advice I can give you is to let it ride for a while. Nothing has to be decided today or tomorrow or next week or even next month.”

“That’s true. I just wish I didn’t feel so shitty when I’m not with him, which is most of the time.”

“Now you know how I felt when I left Will to come back to the city.”

“Yeah, and I feel bad because I didn’t get it then. But I do now, so I’m sorry if I wasn’t sensitive enough to how miserable you were.”

“You were fine, and you might not want to hear it, but you sound an awful lot like a woman in love.”

“I’m not in love.”

“No?”

“No. Definitely not.” The phone line beeped with an incoming call. “Hang on. I’m getting a beep. Oh hey, it’s Emma. I need to take this. Call you this week?”

“Please do, and hang in there, okay?”

“I will. Love you.”

“Love you, too.”

How’s the sap running? Choose your adverb: swimmingly, phenomenally, copiously, amply, abundantly, generously, very well indeed. In other words, the tanks are close to overflowing; twice as much sap is coming in per hour as the reverse osmosis can handle. It will run all night.

—Colton Abbott’s sugaring journal, April 13

L
ucy took the call from her sister, somewhat relieved to be spared any further speculation as to whether she was in love with Colton. “Hi, Em.”

“Hey, are you home?”

“Just got in.”

“How was the weekend?”

“Fine.”

“Still not ready to spill the beans?”

Since his family knew all about them it probably was time to tell hers. “I might be more ready than I was.”

“Good. Come over for pizza with me, Simone and Dad. Invite Troy if you want.”

Lucy had a lot to do after being away for four days, but the idea of spending hours alone with her own thoughts wasn’t very appealing. “What time?”

“Around six.”

“I’ll be there.”

“Simone will be excited. She’s been missing her Auntie Lu on the weekends.”

A pang of guilt struck in the vicinity of her heart. “Tell her I’ll make it up to her.”

“I’ll do no such thing. She’s already a spoiled monster as it is.”

“She is not! She’s an angel.”

“We’ll agree to disagree. See you soon!”

“See you.” Lucy ended the call with Emma and sent a text to their friend Troy, inviting him to Emma’s for dinner.

He replied right away.
Would love to. I’ve been missing my friends lately.

Once again Lucy felt guilty about the people she’d been neglecting while she ran off every weekend to meet Colton. Her friends and family had propped her up after her mother died and had been so supportive since Cameron decided to move. They deserved more from her than weeks of silence and mystery.

She spent the next couple of hours doing laundry and wading through the swamp that was her e-mail inbox. It had exploded in her absence with messages from clients, potential clients, past clients and employees seeking guidance on ongoing projects. All the activity should’ve made her ecstatic, especially when she thought about how hard she and Cameron had worked to begin the business and how badly they’d struggled during the economic downturn.

Things were flush again. They were busier than ever. And she couldn’t have cared less. “This is bad,” she whispered to herself and her empty apartment. “Really bad.” How could one weekend—albeit an amazingly awesome weekend—totally screw her mojo?

It couldn’t. That was all there was to it. Tomorrow she would hit it hard and get back to work with a vengeance. She’d had two extra days off and had three days to make it count at work before Colton arrived for a week in the city.

She’d see him in three days. There was no way she was spending the next three days moping around like a lovesick puppy. She wasn’t lovesick or any other kind of sick.

Three hours later, she was sitting on the floor of her niece’s pink bedroom, dressing and undressing the American Girl dolls she’d bought for Simone for Christmas and taking orders from the tiny princess who had her firmly wrapped around her little finger.

The voices of Emma, their dad and Troy filtered in from the living room, chatting away as they watched a Yankee game and waited for the pizza Emma had ordered to arrive.

“Put this one on Rebecca,” Simone directed, handing Lucy a red velvet gown.

“I like that with her dark hair.”

“That color doesn’t look good with our hair, does it?” Simone asked. She’d been either blessed or cursed—depending on who you asked—with the exact same auburn curls as her Aunt Lucy.

“It’s not our best shade,” Lucy agreed. She’d made it a priority to prepare her niece for life as a redhead to the best of her ability. Whereas Lucy tended to be a somewhat mild-mannered redhead, Simone had gotten the more fiery personality that often accompanied red locks, and Lucy adored every feisty inch of the little girl with the big personality.

The doorbell ringing in the other room had Simone bolting from the bedroom.

“I guess that means playtime is over, Rebecca,” Lucy said to the doll as she placed her carefully on Simone’s bed. Those “toys” cost an arm, a leg
and
a foot.

After the pizza had been devoured and Simone sent off to take a shower, Lucy felt three sets of eyes homing in on her and sensed the inquisition she’d been putting off for weeks now could no longer be avoided.

Deciding a preemptive strike was in order, she put her wineglass on the coffee table. “His name is Colton Abbott, and yes, he’s Will’s brother. I like him. He likes me. We have fun together, and no, I’m not moving. Not now or ever, and he knows that. He’ll be here next week on business, and I’d like you all to meet him as long as you promise not to turn a very nice molehill into a mountain of epic proportions.”

“Did you just refer to your boyfriend as a molehill?” Emma asked.

“It was a
metaphor
.”

Troy sighed and shook his head. “What’s with those Abbott guys anyway?” He’d been less than thrilled when Cameron decided to move to Vermont to live with Will.

The words
magic wand
danced through Lucy’s mind, but since her dad was watching her with the wise gray eyes that didn’t miss much of anything, Lucy refrained from sharing the thought. “They’re nice guys.”

“Is he as nice to look at as Will is?” Emma asked. “Will is
dreamy
.”

“Oh barf,” Troy said. “Dreamy. What guy wants to be called that?”

Emma stuck her tongue out at him. “You’d probably love to have a woman call you that.”

“Right,” Troy said. “Pardon me if I pass on that.”

“Colton is every bit as nice to look at as Will is,” Lucy interjected when she got the chance. “Maybe even more so.”

“Oh, damn,” Emma said. “This I’ve got to see.”

“He’s got four single brothers you need to see, too,” Lucy said with a wink for her sister.

“No!” Troy said, startling them with his vehemence. “No more with these Abbott guys! You say you aren’t moving, but you probably will. You’re just saying what we want to hear.”

“That is
not
true, and I resent the implication that I’m placating you. I have no plans to move, and he is well aware of that.”

“Seems I’ve heard that song once before.”

“You’re being kind of a jerk, Troy,” Emma said.

“So what if I am? I’m not supposed to care that my best friends are getting involved with guys who live six hours from me?”

“I’m going to cut you some slack.” Lucy rested her hand on Troy’s denim-covered leg. “But only because I’ve been where you are when Cameron was all gaga over Will and trying to pretend otherwise for our sakes. I know how that feels as a friend, and I don’t want to make you feel that way. I’m not Cameron. I’m not gaga or any other thing. I’m having fun with a nice guy. That’s all it is. All it’s ever going to be.”

“Sorry,” Troy muttered. “I didn’t mean to be a jerk.”

“Yeah, you did,” Lucy said with a grin for him. “But don’t worry. We’re used to it. We know how you can be.”

He scowled at her and then smiled, which set things right between them.

She truly did get how he felt, having just been through losing Cameron from her daily life at work and at play. It wasn’t easy, and she didn’t blame Troy for being concerned about it happening again.

“You haven’t said a word, Dad,” Lucy said when she’d pacified Troy. “That’s not like you.” Ray Mulvaney always had an opinion about what his girls were up to and wasn’t shy about sharing those opinions. His wiry hair was all gray now and his face weather-beaten from years of working in construction before he finally retired a few years ago.

“Not much to say. Yet. I’ll reserve judgment until I meet this Colton Abbott fellow.”

“You are in so much trouble,” Emma declared.

“I’m not afraid of him,” Lucy said, even though she was a tiny bit afraid of what her dad might think of Colton. He’d pushed both his daughters to go to college and put a lot of value on education. Colton hadn’t gone to college, but he was a hardworking guy like her father had been. Surely that would count for something, right?

“You’ll bring him home while he’s in town? I’ll make dinner.”

Even though he’d asked a question, they all knew it was a statement and not a question.

“Of course. He wants to meet you. All of you.”

She stayed to tuck in Simone, who had no interest in going to bed. “Do you have a boyfriend, Auntie Lu?”

“What makes you ask that?”

“You’ve been going away a lot on the weekends, and Mommy said it’s because you have a boyfriend.”

Lucy rubbed noses with Simone, which made her niece giggle. “Mommy has a big mouth, but don’t tell her I told you that.”

“So you don’t have a boyfriend?”

The word
boyfriend
reminded Lucy of how badly Colton had wanted her to refer to him as such. “Yes, I guess I do. His name is Colton, and he’s really handsome.”

“Do you have a picture of him?”

“I sure do.” She scrolled through the photos on her phone until she found a particular favorite from two weekends ago. “That’s him.”

“He’s really cute.”

“Yes, he is.” The sight of his face on her screen did crazy things to her insides and made her miss him fiercely.

“Are you going to move away like Cameron did?” Simone’s bottom lip fluttered and her big blue eyes filled with tears that broke Lucy’s heart.

“No, baby. I’m not going anywhere. How could I move away when you’re here?”

Simone sat up and wrapped her chubby arms around Lucy’s neck. “I don’t want you to move away.”

“I’m not going anywhere, sweetheart. I promise. I may go to visit Colton in Vermont, where Cam lives now, but I’m not leaving you. Okay?”

“Okay.”

Lucy settled her in bed and kissed both cheeks as well as the end of her nose, finishing with a noisy kiss on Simone’s lips. “Love you.”

“Love you, too, Lulu.”

Hearing the nickname Simone had come up with when she couldn’t say
Lucy
as a baby set off a tidal wave of memories. Simone hadn’t called her that in years.

She closed Simone’s door and discovered Emma waiting in the hall for her.

“I hope you’re not making promises you can’t keep,” Emma said.

“I would never do that to her, and you should know better than to imply otherwise.”

“I do. I’m sorry. After Cameron moved, she’s worried that other people are going to leave, too.”

“Well, I’m not.” Lucy gathered up her purse and left two twenties on the table for the pizza she knew Emma couldn’t afford. “So you can both quit your fretting.”

“Luce . . .”

“What?”

“Don’t leave mad. As much as we’d both hate to see you go, we’d never get in the way of your happiness.”

“I know that.” Lucy hugged her sister. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” Wound up after the intense conversations with Emma and Simone, Lucy took her time walking the ten blocks between their place and hers. Unlike most New Yorkers who fled the city in July and August, Lucy loved summer in the city. She loved the sidewalk cafés and the people out and about. She loved the flowers in window boxes and the leafy trees planted between concrete slabs. The frenetic city took on more of a languid pace in the summer. It was too hot to rush anywhere, so people tended to take their time in a way they didn’t the rest of the year.

Summer in New York suited her.
Life
in New York suited her. It was where she belonged, and nothing—not even a sweet, sexy mountain man—would ever change that.

*   *   *

As he’d feared, his mountain looked very different to Colton post-Lucy. After spending the afternoon with Max and leaving his younger brother in slightly better spirits than he’d found him, Colton drove home from Burlington with his new toys still in their bags and boxes.

Normally, the sound of silence didn’t bother him. He usually relished it after growing up in the madness that was the Abbotts’ barn. But now the silence was deafening, and it only got worse when he arrived home to more coolers on his porch and no Lucy to keep him entertained. He saw her everywhere, from the bench outside the retail store to the tiny shower stall in the bathhouse to the bed that was still rumpled from their earlier lovemaking.

He never went back to bed during the day, but today he couldn’t resist the need to see if her scent still clung to his pillows. It did, and the memories it invoked hit him like a fist to the gut, making him moan from the misery of having to let her go.

Unnerved by his unusual behavior, Sarah and Elmer joined him on the bed, nuzzling him from either side and trying to draw him out to engage with them.

“I’m okay, guys.” Colton scratched their ears. “I miss Lucy.”

Sarah’s whimper let him know she missed Lucy, too.

In all the years he’d lived alone on the mountain, he’d never been lonely. Sure, he had a lot of visitors, and his family was close enough for company if and when he needed it, but this kind of loneliness was all new to him. The only one who could make it better was six hours away in a city he’d never even been to.