I Think My Dad Is a Spy (2 page)

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Authors: Sognia Vassallo

Tags: #Children's Mystery Fiction, #Children's Fiction - Humorous

BOOK: I Think My Dad Is a Spy
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We turned the street corner from a quiet lane into the main street, which bustled with teenagers going to school. We had to dodge cars, bikes, scooters, kids on rollerblades and any other thing that had wheels. But that wasn't the worst of it, the Murphy brothers often threw rotten oranges from Mrs Kennedy's orchard trees at anyone who looked like a good target.

The boys were five horrible bullies who gave their poor mum such a hard time. I remember once when I was delivering their mail I heard Mrs Murphy threatening she would start adopting
them out one by one if they didn't start behaving themselves.

WHOOSH! SPLAT!

“IF JUST ONE OF THOSE HIT ME I SWEAR I WILL MURDER WHOEVER THREW IT!”
I bellowed grumpily over my
shoulder. The brothers often annoyed us but after I yelled at them they just walked right on by and Mitchell even mumbled a ‘sorry'. I was shocked but of course I tried not to let my friends see that. I would have them believe it's because sometimes when I growl people take notice of me. Janice and Theo would tell you it's because the Murphy
brothers are scared of Michael McClain and what he might do if they picked on his ‘little sister'.

We were almost at the school and I couldn't help but notice that it looked like something out of a story book. Originally the land was an orchard belonging to the Mead family which is why it was called ‘Orchard Mead High School'. The administration block is like a bazillion years old and looked it. I think it was the original homestead because it's made from stones, clay and straw. The rose garden surrounding the school is always so neat. Sometimes I thought it was such a shame to have all these grotty teenagers trampling through them every day. Mr Ferguson, the groundskeeper, must be a very patient man.

Suddenly Janice squealed with excitement:

“OMG, I THINK I'VE GOT IT!” she screeched throwing her
arms out in front of me.

WHACK!

“OWW!” I cried as I felt the harsh slap across my rib cage.

“Whoops sorry. I didn't mean to smack you Soph, it was an accident.”

If I didn't believe Theo before, I really did now think Janice was trying to kill me today!

“But Soph, I think I know why your dad's been acting so weird lately,” she said pulling hard on my school blazer so I would follow her off the footpath.

“I'm sure your dad's gotta'…” but she stopped mid-sentence and cautiously looked around to make sure we couldn't be overheard.

“Well what is he?” I asked impatiently.

“I think he's a sp…”

BEEEEP!

But Janice's words were drowned out by a car horn.

“A what?” I yelled back, but another car horn had double-beeped over me as well.

BEEEEP! BEEEEP!

Frustrated, Janice took a deep breath and shouted out as loud as she could, “I THINK YOUR DAD'S A SPY, SOPHIE!”

The busy street fell silent but Janice's words echoed around the school car park. This time there weren't any car horns beeping or bicycle bells ringing. Everybody had stopped what they were doing to stare at us.

I felt so embarrassed. I looked straight down at my shoes and I urged them to just walk in the direction of the school gates. My face felt hot and my heart was racing. I made a point not to look up when a group of students giggled at me as I scurried passed them. I even ignored Nichole McGerny when she yelled out, “Hey Sophie watch out!” But I really shouldn't have ignored her because…”

BANG!

OMG!

How embarrassing, I had slammed headfirst into Principal Mr McNabb.

I could tell it was him just by looking at his expensive Italian shoes, which I was now standing on.

All the students and some of the parents erupted into laughter. I wanted to run off in the hope this hadn't just happened. Maybe I was still sleeping and this was all a nightmare, I thought. I shut my eyes tight and pinched myself sharply. Ow! No, I was awake all right!

I opened my eyes. I am never going to live this down, I kept thinking to myself over and over.

“Sophie George what are you doing?” asked the deep gravelly voice of Mr McNabb. Suddenly everyone fell silent. I did not want to look up but knew I couldn't stand on his feet forever. Slowly I moved my gaze from his shiny black shoes all the way up to his navy blue suit. My eyes reached his grey necktie, which looked like it was choking his chubby neck.

“Perhaps you should watch where you're walking Miss George,” he said in a surprisingly good mood as he ushered me off his shoes.

“SORRY SIR, IT WON'T HAPPEN AGAIN!” I blurted in a booming nervous voice. Whenever I felt nervous my voice got louder, which was just another embarrassing trait of mine.

“Come on,” he said warmly as we walked through the large gates and into school.

Mr McNabb patted my shoulder as he left me standing on the main pathway alongside the rose bushes. I pretended to be interested in the flowers while I waited impatiently for my friends to catch up.

“Oh my god Sophie, are you all right? That must've been so embarrassing for you!” Theo said scrambling to my side.

“Oh my god, I know. I don't know what was worse—banging into Mr McNabb or Janice telling the WHOLE WORLD my dad is a spy,” I said glaring at Janice.

“Oh it was definitely when you slammed headfirst into Mr McNabb,” Janice pointed out ever so efficiently.

My friends were both nodding in agreement reminding me of those silly bobble-head dolls. I was so upset with them that I didn't bother to argue the point any further. Instead I walked off in the direction of my locker.

“STOP THAT McCLAIN! PUT DOWN THAT
BOY INSTANTLY!” bellowed Mr McNabb. His booming voice snapped me back into the horrible reality that was high school.

McNabb was yelling at Michael McClain who was holding poor Dunstan Milfrey up by his underwear in what was suitably called a ‘Hanging Wedgie'.

“IF YOU ENJOY HANGING AROUND WITH THE JUNIORS SO MUCH, I'M SURE WE COULD ARRANGE FOR YOU TO JOIN IN SOME OF THEIR CLASSES TODAY!” McNabb bellowed across the quadrangle.

“No sir. I'm sorry sir,” Michael retorted as he quickly dropped Dunstan back on the ground.

“What an idiot,” I said sadly shaking my head in shame.

“Yeah, I agree,” said Theo.

“Me too,” said Janice. “Soooooooo Sophie, what do you think about what I said earlier; you know about your dad?” Janice reminded me.

She looked overly excited about her ridiculous theory.

I was trying hard to ignore that she even mentioned the ‘my-father-is-a-spy-nonsense' when all of a sudden I saw the Luna twins coming this way.

“Good morning Mr McNabb,” sang Lulu and Lola as they stood blocking Mr McNabb's path, causing him to come to an abrupt halt.

“Oh, good morning girls,” he stammered as he desperately looked around for any type of distraction other than the identical twins standing before him.

“Would you like us to carry anything to your office today?” the Luna twins chorused. Every word they said they sang together. They were so annoying it made me sick.

“A-hem…no thank you girls…not today,” Mr McNabb said awkwardly as he tried to move past them. He stepped forward, sideways and backwards but the girls mirrored his actions and blocked his path. I felt kind of sorry for him as he looked extremely uncomfortable. I could tell by the dread in his eyes
that he was desperate for someone, anyone, to rescue him.

Suddenly my imagination began to drift off. I had another idea for a cartoon drawing; I was running towards the Loony twins waving my arms and shooing the horrible girls away like they were a pair of oversized seagulls. Squawk! Squawk! I laughed out loud.

“Soph…Sophie? Sophie George are you even listening to me!” Janice barked.

I didn't realise she had even been speaking to me. I wanted to say, ‘yes, of course I heard you Janice' but I didn't want to lie. I was thinking of something to say when all of a sudden I saw Mrs Smith, the deputy principal, arrive on the scene.

“This ought to be good,” I murmured, rubbing my hands together excitedly.

“Yoo Hoo! Mr McNabb!” she screeched, “Do you
have a moment?” She waddled briskly along the path, past the tall yellow rose bushes.

Mrs Smith reminded me of one of those WWE wrestlers, like in wrestle-mania. She is quite short but very stocky and when she glares at you with her cold grey eyes it makes you weak in the knees.

At the start of the year I drew a cartoon of Mrs Smith wrestling with Mr McNabb. Somebody most have got hold of it and photocopied about a million copies because by the end of the day nearly every student had a copy of the drawing.

Thank goodness I didn't sign my name on it but unfortunately Mr McNabb recognised my drawing style and I got detention for it anyway. Although he must have thought it was funny too because I saw him smile as he put a copy in his briefcase to take home.

However today Mr McNabb was quite relieved to see Mrs Smith coming his way and happily waited for her to catch up. As soon as Mrs Smith joined him, she glared up at the twins and told them to shoo off and stop bothering the poor man.

The girls were infuriated; they huffed loudly and stormed off with their noses high in the air. I made a mental note to myself to draw a cartoon of the ‘Loony twins' as oversized seagulls being shooed away by Mrs Smith in her wrestle-mania costume. “He, he, he,” I tittered under my breath.

I like drawing cartoons, writing stories and making short films because one day I am going to be a famous writer and movie producer. Last year in primary school I made a short film documentary about the people living in Orchard Mead. Mrs Bingle thought it was so good she entered it into a nationwide competition; I won first prize. A few people didn't think I deserved to win because they said I had exploited them.

Well all I can say is that the camera doesn't lie. It wasn't my fault that my hidden camera had caught Mr Hammond visiting Mrs Benning-Finlay's office late one evening while her husband was out of town. But apparently it was my fault they got divorced because I left that scene in the movie! I only set up the camera in the first place because Mrs Benning-Finlay told me she suspected her secretary was stealing office supplies.

Journal entry:
Tuesday, 10:27pm

During second period Mr Griggs told us to pair up because we were going to do a science experiment called the ‘Pop Test'. Janice pushed and shoved her way through the students who were busily squabbling amongst themselves to see who was going to pair up with whom and barged her way in between Theo and I with a mighty shove. She bowled him out of the way and declared me her new partner.

“Hey that's not fair!” Theo shouted from the laboratory floor.

“Finders keepers, losers weepers,” Janice teased poking her tongue out.

“NO PUSHING MISS VOYCE. IF YOU CAN'T PAIR UP PROPERLY WITH SOMEONE, I WILL FIND YOU A PARTNER!” scolded Mr Griggs eyeballing her from above his glasses.

He never missed a trick old Mr Griggs and I suppose he had to be very vigilant trusting a bunch of teenagers with highly explosive and poisonous chemicals. I imagine it must be quite a stressful job.

“Sorry sir, I didn't mean to push. I meant to bump into Theo, I slipped,” Janice stuttered.

“YOU DIDN't SLIP AND THAT WASN'T A BUMP! YOU
BULLDOZED INTO ME,” Theo scowled angrily.

“Oh and you don't need to find me a partner, I already have one—it's Sophie,” Janice said ignoring Theo as she yanked me out from behind the desk as evidence.

Theo gasped with outrage as he shot up off the floor and brushed himself off.

I felt sorry for him, not just because his usual neat and carefully parted hair looked terribly scruffy, but because Theo was left without a partner.

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