Ida a Novel (17 page)

It is not easy to lead a different life, much of it never happens but when it does it is different.

So Ida and Andrew never knew but it was true they were to lead a different life and yet again they were not.

If one did the other did not, and if the other did then the other did not.

And this is what happened.

If they had any friends they had so many friends.

They were always accompanied, Andrew when he came and went and wherever he was, Ida was not accompanied but she was never alone and when they were together they were always accompanied.

This was natural enough because Andrew always had been and it was natural enough because Ida always had been.

Men were with them and women were with them and men and women were with them.

It was this that made Ida say let’s talk.

It was this that made Ida say, I like to know that all I love to do is to say something and he hears me.

It was this that made Ida say I never could though they were not glad to come.

It was this that made Ida say how do you do do come. It was this that made Ida say yes anything I can do I can always ask Andrew and Andrew will always do anything I ask him to do and that is the reason I call him Handy Andy.

Ida never laughed she smiled and sometimes she yawned and sometimes she closed her eyes and sometimes she opened them and she rested. That is what Ida did.

It did look as if nothing could change, nothing could change Ida that was true, and if that was true could anything change Andrew.

In a way nothing could but he could come not to be Andrew and if he were not Andrew Ida would not call him Handy Andy and as a matter of fact when he was not any longer Andrew she never did call him Handy Andy. She called him Andy, and she called him Andrew then but that was not the same thing.

But it was natural enough. Nature is not natural and that is natural enough.

Ida knew that is she did not exactly know them but all the same she did know them some people who always were ready to be there.

The larger the house these people had the more ready they were to be there.

Ida might have to come to that but if she did she could not rest.

Oh dear she often said oh dear isn’t it queer.

More than that she needed no help, but she might come to need help, and if she would come to need help she would help herself and if she helped herself then she certainly would be needing help.

I let it alone, she told everybody, and she did. She certainly did. But most gradually Andrew it was true was a way to do, not for Ida, but for Andrew, and that made a lot of trouble, not for Ida, but for Andrew.

What was because was just what was a bother to Ida because she saw that Andrew was across from where he was.

Nobody knew whether it was happening slowly or not. It might be slowly and it might not.

Once in a great while Ida got up suddenly.

When she did well it was sudden, and she went away not far away but she left. That happened once in a way.

She was sitting just sitting, they said if you look out of the window you see the sun. Oh yes said Ida, and they said, do you like sunshine or rain and Ida said she liked it best. She was sitting of course and she was resting and she did like it best.

They said, well anybody said, More than enough. Oh yes said Ida, I like it, yes I do, I like it.

Somebody said, well let us go on. No said Ida I always say no, no said Ida. And why not they asked her, well said Ida if you go away. We did not say we were going away, they said. Believe it or not we did not say we were going away, they said. Well said Ida I feel that way too. Do you they said. Yes said Ida I feel that way too.

It was not then that she got up suddenly. It was considerably after. She was not startled, a dog might bark suddenly but she was not startled. She was never startled at once. If she was, well she never was.

But after all, if she got up suddenly, and she did not very often. And once she got up suddenly she left.

That did not as a matter of fact make very much difference.

More than enough she never really said, but once well really once she did get up suddenly and if she did get up suddenly she went away.

Nobody ever heard Andrew ever mention what he did because he never did it.

Everybody always said something, they said let’s have it again, and they always had it again.

For this much they did come in, of course there never really was a beginning, for which it was fortunate.

Ida was mostly fortunate even if it did not matter. It really did not matter, not much.

So whether it was slowly or not was not enough because nobody was scared. They might be careful Ida was careful.

For which reason she was never worried not very likely to be.

She once said when this you see remember me, she liked being like that. Nicely.

For this reason she was rested. She will get up suddenly once and leave but not just now. Not now.

They could exchange well she knew more about hats than cows.

Andrew was interested in cows and horses. But after all there was much more in the way they sat down. Believe it or not they did sit down.

Part Eight

Well he said Andrew said that he could not do without Ida. Ida said yes, and indeed when she said yes she meant yes. Yes Andrew could not do without Ida and Ida said yes. She knew she might go away suddenly, but she said yes.

And so it came to be not more exciting but more yes than it had been.

Ida did say yes.

And Andrew was not nervous that is to say Andrew trembled easily but he was not nervous. Ida was nervous and so she said yes. If you are resting and you say yes you can be nervous, and Ida was nervous. There was no mistake about Ida’s being nervous. She was not nervous again, she was just nervous. When she said yes she was not nervous. When she was resting she was nervous. Nearly as well as ever she said she was, she said she was nearly as well as ever, but nobody ever asked her if she is well, they always knew she was nearly as well as ever.

It happened that when she went out she came in. Well she did go out and when she went out she came in.

Andrew went in and went out, but Ida did not.

When she went out she came in.

This was not just in the beginning it came to be more so, the only time that it ever was otherwise was when she got up suddenly and this did happen soon.

And so Andrew well Andrew was not careless nothing ever made Andrew careless.

He was much prepared.

Neither Andrew nor Ida was astonished but they were surprised. They had that in common that they were surprised not suddenly surprised but just surprised.

They were not astonished to learn but they were surprised.

This is what happened.

Ida had an aunt, she remembered she had an aunt but that had nothing to do with Ida nothing at all. Next to nothing to do with Ida.

Her aunt well her aunt sometimes did not feel that way about it but not very often and really it had nothing to do with Ida or with what happened.

What happened was this.

Ida returned more and more to be Ida. She even said she was Ida.

What they said. Yes she said. And they said why do you say yes. Well she said I say yes because I am Ida.

It got quite exciting. It was not just exciting it was quite exciting. Every time she said yes, and she said yes any time she said anything, well any time she said yes it was quite exciting.

Ida even was excited, well not altogether but she really was excited. Even Andrew was excited and as for the rest of all of them, all of them were excited.

And in between, well Ida always did have a tendency to say yes and now she did say, she even sometimes said oh yes.

Everybody was excited, it was extraordinary the way everybody was excited, they were so excited that everybody stopped everything to be excited.

Ida was excited but not very excited. At times she was not excited but she did always say yes.

Andrew was excited, he was not excited when he took his walk but he was quite often excited. Ida did say yes.

They went out together of course but it was difficult as the more excited he was the faster he went and the more excited she was the slower she went and as she could not go faster and he could not go slower. Well it was all right.

They lived from day to day. Ida did. So did they all. Some of their friends used to look at clouds, they would come in and say this evening I saw a cloud and it looked like a hunting dog and others would say he saw a cloud that looked like a dragon, and another one would say he saw a cloud that looked like a dream, and another he saw a cloud that looked like a queen. Ida said yes and Andrew said very nicely. They liked people to come in and tell what kind of clouds they had seen. Some had seen a cloud that looked like a fish and some had seen a cloud that looked like a rhinoceros, almost any of them had seen a cloud.

It was very pleasant for Ida that they came and told what the clouds they had seen looked like.

Ida lived from day to day so did they all but all the same a day well a day was not really all day to Ida, she needed only a part of the day and only a part of the night, the rest of the day and night she did not need. They might but she did not.

Andrew did not need day nor night but he used it all he did not use it up but he used it, he used it all of it it was necessary to use all of it and it was always arranged that he did everything that was necessary to do and he did. It was necessary that he used all of the night and all of the day every day and every night. This was right.

Ida chose just that piece of the day and just that piece of the night that she would use.

All right.

They did not say it but she said it and that was why she said yes.

And then something did happen.

What happened was this.

Everybody began to miss something and it was not a kiss, you bet your life it was not a kiss that anybody began to miss. And yet perhaps it was.

Well anyway something did happen and it excited every one that it was something and that it did happen.

It happened slowly and then it was happening and then it happened a little quicker and then it was happening and then it happened it really happened and then it had happened and then it was happening and then well then there it was and if it was there then it is there only now nobody can care.

And all this sounds kind of funny but it is all true.

And it all began with everybody knowing that they were missing something and perhaps a kiss but not really nobody really did miss a kiss. Certainly not Ida.

Ida was not interested, she was resting and then it began oh so slowly to happen and then there it was all right there it was everybody knew it all right there it was.

Dear Ida.

What happened.

Well what happened was this. Everybody thought everybody knew what happened. And everybody did know and so it was that that happened. Nothing was neglected that is Ida did nothing Andrew did nothing but nothing was neglected.

When something happens nothing begins. When anything begins then nothing happens and you could always say with Ida that nothing began.

Nothing ever did begin.

Partly that and partly nothing more. And there was never any need of excuses. You only excuse yourself if you begin or if somebody else begins but with Ida well she never began and nobody else began. Andrew although he was different was the same, he was restless all day and Ida was resting all day but neither one nor the other had to begin. So in a way nothing did happen.

That was the way it was nothing did happen. Everybody talked all day and every day about Ida and Andrew but nothing could happen as neither the one of them or the other one ever did begin anything.

It is wonderful how things pile up even if nothing is added. Very wonderful.

Suppose somebody comes in, suppose they say, well how are we today. Well supposing they do say that. It does not make any difference but supposing they do say that. Somebody else comes in and says that too well how are we today. Well if Ida has not answered the first one she could not answer the second one because you always have to answer the first one before you answer the second one.

And if there was still a third one and mostly there was and a fourth one and a fifth one and even a sixth one and each one said well and how are we today, it is natural enough that Ida would have nothing to say. She had not answered the first one and if you are resting you cannot hurry enough to catch up and so she had nothing to say. Yes she said. It is natural enough that she said yes, because she did not catch up with anything and did not interrupt anything and did not begin anything and did not stop anything.

Yes said Ida.

It looks the same but well of course one can run away, even if you are resting you can run away. Not necessarily but you can. You can run away even if you say yes. And if you run away well you never come back even if you are completely followed.