Identity Crisis (6 page)

‘He didn’t know for a long time. Then he found out.’

‘How?’

A light blush crawled up Garrett’s throat, and she had to admit he was sexy when he was wrong-footed. ‘Rumors got out that he was supporting me.’

‘Oh?’

He shrugged. ‘I might have started them. Possibly. And it really wasn’t that hard for people to believe. No one knew who Tess Delaney was, and I had no visible means of support. I mean, I couldn’t really do a part-time job and write like I needed to to keep up with the demand for Tess’s books.’

‘It couldn’t have been that easy,’ she said.

‘It wasn’t as hard as you think.’ She thought she saw pain cross his face, but wasn’t certain. He straightened his jacket and was suddenly all business. ‘We’ve only got a week. I’m willing to do what we have to. I don’t want Tess outed. Are we clear?’

‘Very clear,’ she said. She pulled out her iPhone and began to make notes. ‘I’ll get Don Bachman to send me all the information about the event along with any other relevant details. Then you send me anything else you think I need to know, I don’t care how minute. If you think it’s important, then it probably is.’

‘What if there are questions about Tess’s work?’ he asked.

‘Trust me, Tess Delaney making her first public appearance on the arm of the enigmatic Garrett Thorne will be such a sensation that no one will be thinking about Tess’s work. Besides, I have a great memory. I promise no one will stump me if they do ask.’

She looked down at her watch. ‘I’ve got to go, Garrett. There’s a lot to be done, and I’m a perfectionist. If you need to get in touch with K. Ryde, I’ve just emailed an address to Gary Rose. Otherwise you already have Kay Lake’s email.’ She stood, and he walked her to the door. ‘I’ll email you as soon as I have everything sorted.’

‘What if I want to get in touch with plain old Kendra Davis?’ he said.

‘Now, why would Garrett Thorne want to get in touch with Kendra Davis?’ She offered him a smile that was probably a little more of a smirk than she intended. ‘After all, they hate each other, remember?’

Once she was out of the office, she made a mad dash for the restroom in the main reception area. She managed to lock herself in a cubicle before the shakes began. She collapsed against the wall, sliding down it until she was seated on the floor breathing in and out, in and out, trying to slow the mad hammering rage of her heart. Was she crazy? Was she out of her mind? She should go right back in there and tell Garrett no. No way could she do this thing. No way should she even think about doing this thing. Not now, not ever! Not ever again. Hadn’t she learned her lesson? Hadn’t she paid in spades for her quiet life, and here she was about to go public in the biggest possible way. She couldn’t. She just couldn’t. She was sorry for Garrett, but she couldn’t run the risk. She couldn’t put herself through it all again.

For a long time she sat on the floor of the cubicle looking up at the ceiling through a mist of tears that was brought on by the first panic attack she’d had in a long time now. But, as her mind cleared, logic once again took over. What had happened in Santa Monica was the past. It couldn’t hurt her now. She could live her life in the open again. She could do whatever she wanted. And until she did step outside the little cozy comfort zone she had created for herself here in Portland with Dee and Harris, how could she ever expect to truly get over the past? She’d stopped seeing the psychologist three months ago, but she knew that getting back on the horse was a big part of the healing process. And really there was no denying that playing Tess Delaney for Garrett Thorne was by far the most intriguing prospect she’d had in a very long time, even when she was head of the Ryde Agency, working with the stars.

By the time she was able to stand again and had found her way out of the cubicle to freshen her make-up she had convinced herself that being Tess Delaney for Garrett Thorne might be the best thing that could happen to her right now. It would be interesting work, challenging work, work that might be very healing. She could help Garrett keep Tess’s identity secret while at the same time helping herself back into a world that was a little less neurotic.

Yes, she was disappointed there would be no wildly feminine romance author flouncing around her lush Victorian house, laughing wickedly at Kendra’s dry wit and sharp questions. But how could she not be intrigued? All of those stories that gripped her, all of those stories that seemed to come straight from the core of everything that was powerful and vulnerable and mysterious and wild and female, all of those stories about the magnetic draw between the sexes had actually been written by a man, and one who was pretty much a jerk at that. It was the kind of challenge K. Ryde could never resist. By the time she got to the parking lot and was securely belted into the Mustang, she was already making a list in her head of things that had to be done to prepare both Tess Delaney and her bad boy date for the glitz and the glam, and for the subterfuge of the Golden Kiss Awards. 

Chapter Six

Garrett went straight home from the Pneuma Annex. His head was reeling. How could anyone as explosive and impulsive as Kendra Davis be the queen of PR, and how the hell could she possibly pull off what had to happen to make sure Tess didn’t get outed?

By the time he got home, just as she’d promised, he found an email address, a cell phone number, and a list of questions for him to answer that would help her determine the best way to approach her representation of Tess Delaney. He found the whole professional demeanor of the email to be irritating. This was the woman who had pushed him in the lake at his brother’s engagement party. This was the woman whose powerful right arm, he was convinced, could knock out a bull moose if she was angry enough. She was volatile, unpredictable and, from all outward appearances, just as unemployed as he was. And if she held a grudge over what he and Stacie had inadvertently done to Ellis and Dee that had nearly ruined their relationship and their careers, then he was so fucked. Yet what choice did he have? Don believed this woman was his only hope, and the email he’d received from him even before he left the Pneuma Annex was just more evidence of his faith in Kendra Davis – er – K. Ryde.

The emails to Garrett weren’t signed K. Ryde. They were signed Kay Lake. God it was all so confusing. What was he supposed to call her? Who the hell was she really? He changed into jeans and a T-shirt, opened a beer, and settled in at the computer. He’d barely thought about the deadline for
Texas Fire
. The stress of Tess’s imminent outage weighed so heavily that writing anything serious had been next to impossible. And that wasn’t likely to change until after the Golden Kiss Awards were safely behind him, and he and Tess could go back to their quiet life.

With a start, he realized the always nebulous picture of Tess Delaney he held in his head wasn’t so nebulous any more. The face smiling back at him was now Kendra Davis’s face. And the woman standing beside his desk in his mind’s eye, whispering the story in his ear, was dripping wet. Baby blue bikini top and satin shorts clung revealingly to curves that were athletic and muscular but outrageously feminine. Her nipples beaded heavily beneath the wet top and the shorts hugged the rounded hillocks of her bottom. There were no panty lines. Oh yes, he’d noticed that when she’d turned to walk away from him the other day at the lake. By that time he was doing his best to hide the rise of his cock that had been so stunning and had happened so fast it had completely taken him by surprise. The woman was a bitch, he reminded himself. And whatever else she might be, she was most definitely not his Tess Delaney. Well, at least for no longer than it took her to play the role, for no longer than it took her to make sure that Tess’s true identity was protected. And if she betrayed him, if this was her way of getting revenge … He didn’t want to think about that. He couldn’t. He had no choice, and frankly the woman in his imagination, the luscious wet Kendra Davis, offering him a full-lipped pout, had his complete attention. The longer she stood there, in his imagination, watching him work, the more transparent her clothing became, and the more transparent her clothing became, the more uncomfortable the front of his jeans became.

He couldn’t recall his thoughts of Tess ever being truly sexual. She was him, for chrissake! He’d never wanted to date her. He’d never wanted to fuck her. And if Tess Delaney had Kendra Davis’s face – not to mention her body – and he started really seeing her that way in his head, he was so screwed!

‘The woman’s a bitch,’ he said out loud. But as he said it, he was already busy fumbling with his zipper. As he said it he pictured her all dressed up for business. Even all professional and ready to work, she looked like something he’d like to eat with a cherry on top. He’d like to start right at her ankles, just above those pink stilettos, and work his way on up, tongue first, taking the middle path, all the way up those endless legs of hers to what was just barely hidden by her wet shorts, what looked luscious enough to keep him in very filthy thoughts for a long time to come. And it was already clear exactly where those filthy thoughts were leading. He shoved back from the desk and headed for the bathroom jeans open, boxers shoved low around his hips, stroking as he went.

Later, when he returned to his study, there was another email from Kay Lake.

Mr. Rose,

I’m ready to meet with you tomorrow. I’ll need several hours of your time, at your convenience.

Sincerely,

Kay Lake

It chafed, volatile Kendra Davis emailing him all business-like and professional. He ground his teeth and emailed back.

Ms. Lake,

Shall we say 2.00 again?

Then he gave her his home address. He didn’t like the idea of doing what they had to do in the annex of his brother’s business, especially now he knew who she really was. He hoped that the whole distasteful situation could be kept secret as much as possible. Though he figured Dee and Ellis would ultimately have to know, he hoped he’d be able to keep it from Stacie. He wanted no more loose ends than absolutely necessary. If all went well, by the time the banquet was over, Tess Delaney could go happily back into hiding and he and Kay Lake or Kendra Davis could shake hands and never have to speak to each other again.

Don had dropped a quick text that he’d had an email from K. Ryde saying the meeting had gone well and the situation was being dealt with. Garrett wrote back a terse answer basically agreeing but not giving anything away. The less anyone knew the better. It was embarrassing, really. The woman he couldn’t even think about without getting both angry and stiff was going to be Tess Delaney for an event that could turn out to be detrimental to Tess’s career.

Within minutes, Kendra emailed back confirming their appointment.

Garrett had half hoped she would be at least a little bit late, but the professional PR version of Kendra Davis was right on time. She was dressed in black trousers and a light summer blazer over a silky white blouse that draped her body like its only purpose was to caress her. He felt an irrational stab of jealousy as she slipped out of the jacket and handed it over for him to hang. They were barely seated, her with her Diet Pepsi and him with his coffee, before she pulled out her iPad. ‘Did you sleep well?’ she asked without looking up from what she was doing. Her lips curled into a hint of a smile. ‘You should sleep better now that I’m on the job.’

He forced a smile. ‘I’m certainly glad one of us is confident.’

This time she looked up at him, and the smile she offered, if he wasn’t mistaking, was reassuring. ‘It’s natural for you to be nervous about the situation and I know we’re cutting it close to the wire, but believe me when I say I’ve handled a lot worse.’

‘Why?’ he said.

She blinked and the smile faded. He was sorry to see it go. ‘Why what?’

‘Why are you doing this? I know how you feel about me.’

She laid aside the iPad and scooted forward on the sofa. ‘Garrett, this isn’t personal. This is my job, and I really admire Tess Delaney and her body of work.’ He thought he could see a slight blush tinging her cheeks. ‘I figured you could see that yesterday with my extensive knowledge of her novels.’

That did give him a sense of satisfaction.

‘Besides,’ she added, ‘I really am the best in my field.’

‘That’s good. That’s great,’ he said. And it was; he knew it was. But he couldn’t help feeling just a little peeved that she could turn it all on and off as though she had no feelings one way or another. He’d have never thought it possible, but he missed her anger. At least when she was angry he knew what he was up against, and why. Plus, it was hot. There, he’d actually admitted it. She was hot when she was angry. Not that she wasn’t hot now too, but now it felt like she’d put some sort of plexi-glass wall between them. He forced his attention back to what she was saying.

‘I’ve taken care of the limos to get us there and back.’

‘Limos?’

She nodded. ‘There’ll be four, two each way. One we’ll be in and one we won’t. Just a distraction.’

‘A distraction. Right.’

He listened carefully as her brilliant plan unfolded with all the careful arrangements and attention to detail. And then she told him his role in the plan. ‘I know you have no problem looking rakish and getting the attention of the opposite sex, and we’ll be counting on that Friday night.’

He burnt his tongue on his coffee. ‘Excuse me.’

‘Garrett, everyone knows who you are and what your reputation is. You’ve counted on that for a long time to distract people from the truth, so now we’re going to count on it some more. You are going to be stunning and charming and every woman there, and every woman watching you on television, is going to want you.’

He braced himself for the insult that didn’t come. Instead, she continued, ‘And Tess is going to be totally enthralled with you, which will give the press something else to focus on rather than her appearing out of nowhere. Everyone loves a love story, right? Especially if there’s a hint of scandal with it. And the very involvement of Garrett Thorne will give that hint and then some.’

He wiped unusually sweaty hands on his jeans. ‘You’re going to be totally enthralled with me?’

She shook her head and a wisp of a smile brushed her lips. ‘Tess Delaney is going to be totally enthralled with you. You’re her date, Garrett, and the more into each other we appear to be the more attention will be drawn away from Tess Delaney.’

‘You really believe that?’ Garrett said. He figured he could very easily pretend to be into Kendra Davis. He just wasn’t sure how safe it would be.

‘If I didn’t believe that, then we’d be doing something different. Garrett, you have to trust me.’ She ran a hand through her hair. This time she wore it loose around her shoulders. It looked silky and golden, and it was hard for him not to want to follow suit. ‘Look, I know you’re having trouble getting past the rough relationship we’ve had so far, and I can certainly understand that. But I’m a professional, and I would have never taken this job if I didn’t believe we could work together.’

‘You thought you’d be working with Tess Delaney,’ he said.

‘I am working with Tess Delaney.’

He scrubbed his hands over his face. ‘God, it’s all so confusing.’

She patted his arm. ‘Don’t worry. It’ll all be over by this time Saturday, and Tess can go back to keeping her private life private.’

For a second the two sat in silence, him staring down into his half empty coffee cup, her taking notes on her iPad. At last she spoke. ‘Mind if I ask you a personal question?’

He shifted uneasily. ‘You can ask.’

She lay the iPad aside and smiled up at him. ‘Why don’t you want anyone to know that you’re Tess …?’ She backtracked. ‘Why don’t you want anyone to know your relationship to Tess Delaney? I mean, it’s got to be tough to know what people are saying and thinking behind your back when you know none of it’s true.’

‘Just because I’m gainfully employed doesn’t make me a hero, Kendra. It’s better this way, for Tess to take the credit. Besides, I get a much more intimate view of the world when no one takes Garrett Thorne too seriously.’

She held his gaze, and he wasn’t sure what happened, or how, but suddenly there was no doubt it was Kendra Davis’s eyes he was looking into, and it was like looking into fire. ‘Oh, I take you seriously, Garrett. Believe me I do.’

The sudden urge to kiss her was visceral, almost overwhelming, and he might have very well done it if she hadn’t broadsided him with a question that took him almost as much by surprise as her slap had. ‘Garrett, I need to know what you want me to say if Tess wins the Golden Kiss. After all I’ll be taking kudos for you … For the two of you.’

Garrett scratched the stubble on his chin. ‘Honestly, I don’t think there’s any chance of that happening. Did you see the names of the authors Tess is up against?’

‘I did, yes.’

‘They don’t mean anything to you? I mean, they’re huge. They’re the biggest names in the business.’

She blinked. ‘Oh, I know that. I’ve researched them all, and I’ll be very familiar with their work by Friday night.’ She offered him a self-deprecating smile. ‘I never read romance before Tess Delaney, and she’s the only one I’ve read until now.’ Before he could say anything, before he could even let his feelings about that fact sink in, she continued. ‘I’ve researched the other four authors you’re up against well enough to know that your chance is as good as anyone else’s.’

There was no disguising the sense of pride he felt at Kendra Davis actually believing Tess might win the Golden Kiss, but really, how well did she know the business? ‘Thanks,’ he said, ‘but I won’t win, so we don’t have to worry about that, and if we do, well, you can say whatever you want.’

She cocked her head and looked at him in a way that made him think she was expecting to find something, something he was hiding. But just when he was beginning to feel defensive, she shoved her iPad back into her bag and stood.

‘All right then. That’s all I need today.’

‘Wait a minute,’ he said, following her to the door. ‘Don’t we need to – I don’t know – practice? I mean, I barely know you and you said we need to be comfortable with each other.’

She turned so quickly he nearly ran into her. ‘You don’t have to be comfortable with Kendra Davis, Garrett. You have to be comfortable with Tess Delaney, and I promise you will be.’ She looked up at him with a smile that might have been teasing, might have been a smirk. Whichever it was, the small alcove where they now stood suddenly seemed even tighter fitting than it actually was. ‘If it’ll help,’ she said, ‘you can kiss me goodbye.’

‘That’s not very professional,’ he managed, feeling like the breath had been squeezed out of him as he fumbled to help her into her jacket.

Her smile was warm, reassuring. ‘Actually, in our case it’s very professional.’ She rose on her toes and brushed a kiss across his lips. ‘Very professional indeed.’

And before she could pull away he scooped her into his arms, feeling her little gasp of surprise as he took her mouth. What had only been intended to show her he was up for it very quickly changed to something else, and suddenly they were clawing at each other, hands grabbing collars and hair and anything else to get closer. Clothing brushed against clothing until friction mounted and body heat radiated through. And God, her mouth was sweeter than anything, full lips so soft one second and so hard and demanding the next, parted to allow him access to her tongue and her hard palate, to her humid breath coming faster and faster as her fist clenched in his hair and her own tongue battled for supremacy. And her body, Jesus, her body was hard-pressed and tight and mounded and undulating and he’d never felt so much fire just beneath the surface.