Illuminate (36 page)

And then my eyes opened. My head flung toward the door—yes, it was there, closed, locked. But the steady drumbeat of that knocking still came at me.
Thump, thump, thump
. . . relentless. I shook myself awake, trying to snuff it out, but it kept at me, banging at my brain, begging me to face it. I ran my hands over my slick face and damp hair. I held my palms over my ears, but it wouldn’t stop.

The door shook in its frame, barely containing the pounding. I took a breath, hand on the knob, and pulled, bracing myself.

And I screamed. I couldn’t help it. He was standing right there.

“Whoa, morning,” Lance said. He had on his uniform and looked wide awake and ready to start the day.

“Sorry,” I panted.

“I was knocking forever. Thought I’d missed you.” He looked at me like I was a crazy person. “Expecting someone else?”

“Um, no, sorry. What time is it?”

“It’s almost seven. I guess I’m kind of early but I’m feeling way better, and I’m ready to upload those photos anytime you are. I felt bad about leaving you hanging yesterday.”

“Photos?” I couldn’t even begin to process, I was too wiped out and he was speaking too fast. I was still shocked to discover that I had somehow fallen asleep—it’s a testament to how incredibly exhausted I had been that I managed to close my eyes after what I’d seen last night. I shuddered, my whole body shimmied once, fast, as though I were being attacked by ants. It didn’t escape his notice.

“Your photos from the Vault? You okay?”

“Oh, yeah. Thanks. I’ll just get dressed.

“Sure. Oh, and did you come by earlier or was that a weird dream I had? Not that I have dreams about you, but I have crazy dreams here.” He pushed his glasses up on his nose, his eyes darting all around.

“Yeah, no, that was me. I was up late . . . reading, and just thought I’d check on you.”

“Thanks, I’m good.”

I wanted to say,
I’m not, I’m a mess, I have to tell you what I saw last night, this place is freakish and frightening and I don’t know how we ended up here or how we can get out.
But I thought of that book’s admonition and I just couldn’t decide if I could say something or not, so I didn’t.

“That’s great,” I said instead, with no conviction whatsoever. “Twenty minutes?”

He nodded, looking at me with curious eyes and then backing away to his room.

I showered and got dressed in my uniform in a flash but apparently not fast enough for Lance. When I emerged from my room, I found him pacing outside my door like a guard dog—though not a very good one. He shook, clearly startled, when the door opened. I was just glad I wasn’t the only one who was unbelievably jumpy. He played it off though.

“Ready?” He started off down the hall.

“Someone’s in a hurry.”

“I was cooped up in that room all yesterday. It’s just thrilling to be out among the living.”

“Right.” I shuddered again.

In our gallery office, he uploaded the photos I had selected and settled in to build his slide show: adjusting the order of them, and playing with the options so that certain ones zoomed in and others flickered quickly. When he had it all set, he saved it all and left to load it onto the flat screen at the front desk. I was never so glad to not have that job—a few of the new recruits were stationed there and their eyes somehow already looked more leaden than just last night. I had done a spot check zipping by before and found bits of each of their telltale tattoos peeking out from shirtsleeves. Lance had just left and I had begun searching for the day’s press clippings about the hotel—apparently the restaurant had gotten a good review and a trio of stars from something called the
Michelin Guide,
which seemed to be a big deal—when when I heard it. Without the least bit of warning, that rasp stung me: “Haven—”

I gasped and whipped my head to the doorway, a chill spreading across my skin.

“Yes, hello, Aurelia.” I did my best not to seem rattled.

“So sorry to startle you,” she said, with a mischievous smile. “There’s a Joan here for you?”

“Here? Joan?” I couldn’t process this. Joan was here? Now? The chill turned instantly into a cold sweat, my stomach dropped. “What’s she doing here?” I didn’t mean to ask it aloud, but I had lost the ability to filter.
She can’t be here, she can’t be around these people.

“It appears she’s getting a spa treatment.”

“She’s at the spa? Now?” Why wouldn’t she have told me? This is what I got for not calling home enough.

“We’ll be sure to roll out the red carpet and take special care of your guest.” This, unfortunately, sounded entirely sincere.

“I’ll, um, have to go say hello. I think I’ll just, yeah, I’ll just run down there now.” I was up on my feet now. Aurelia still stood in the doorway. “I’ll just be a minute, if you don’t mind.”

“Not at all,” she said. “I’m so glad she’s getting to experience all that we have to offer here.” I waited for her to clear the doorway and then I bolted out of the gallery, walking to the spa as fast as I could without actually breaking into a jog.

***

Joan?” The low hum of a soothing instrumental soundtrack filled the air, along with a sweet, clean scent.

“Surprise, honey!” said the smiling, mummified figure lying on the table. A row of shower heads on a long arm were suspended above, still and dry for the time being but ready to act when called upon.

“Did I miss an e-mail or something?” I was grateful for the cucumber slices over Joan’s eyes. If she had been able to see me she would’ve known something was wrong. But she just launched right in, a mile a minute.

“I don’t like to spring things on you, but Michelle thought it would be so cute since I had the day off to come here. She got me this gift certificate. So sweet of her. We had the school bus accident come into the hospital the other day; did you hear about that on the news? It was just horrific, but everyone is okay. She was a superwoman, that Michelle, but I pulled practically a triple shift and so she said she wanted to thank me. I just thought it would be fun to pop by—I read such wonderful things about this spa in the
Trib,
you know. I hope it’s okay!”

“Um, yeah, it’s great to see you.” My mind raced. How fast could I get her out of here?

“I know you’re very busy. I asked for you at the front desk and those girls—and they really are all just absolutely gorgeous, and so poised and friendly too—said they would let you know right away, but they had to find you because you’re always in meetings and things and they were so sweet and told me to just go and get started here.” Joan’s demeanor reminded me of that time she got tipsy at the family Christmas party.

“So, what is all of this anyway?” I asked. She looked like a burrito, cocooned in what seemed to be foil, and presumably slathered with some kind of lotion and potion underneath. I couldn’t keep my mind from running through all the worst-case scenarios of what could be in there. If only I could’ve somehow gotten here sooner.

“Why, this would be the milk, honey, and sesame body buff with a seaweed wrap,” she said, pleased with herself.

“Wow.” I tried to sound easygoing, like myself. “It, um, sounds like a lunch special.”

“It is very special, I’ll tell you that much. If I got these every day I would be an entirely different person. Ahhh—” I shivered at that, involuntarily. She was blissed out. I was terrified. I wished I could turn the shower heads on, put a stop to this. “—but speaking of lunch, yes, can we have some? I’m almost done here and that restaurant looks just darling—”

“No!” I blurted out, completely rude, but I didn’t care. I couldn’t have her eating here. I couldn’t imagine what damage had already been done. I had to get her out of Lexington, that’s all I could think. I wouldn’t let anything happen to her. Her lips moved into a frown. “No. I just mean,” I said, summoning all my strength to sound normal, “I have a crazy day and all this stuff I’ve gotta get done. I’m trying to do a good job and all and I feel like they shouldn’t see me taking a long break. But maybe another time soon? It’s just, you know, one of those days.”

“Oh, someone is very busy, indeed, isn’t she? I’m so proud of my little worker bee!” She gushed. “This place is just so fancy and incredible, Hav. I suppose I can’t blame you for being a workaholic. I’m so proud of you.”

A woman in a white version of the hotel uniform appeared, someone I didn’t recognize. I could only hope she wasn’t a fully inducted Outfit member. “Time to rinse off, Ms. Terra.”

“That’s me!” said Joan. “I could just stay in this forever.”

“I’ll wait for you, Joan. Walk you out and stuff.”

I sat in the spa’s Japanese garden-like waiting area beside a trickling waterfall and could not have felt less at peace. My leg twitched nervously. I couldn’t imagine what might have been in that concoction they had covered Joan with. I was sure there was something to make her feel good, like all was right in this odd world of the hotel. I heard her voice, thanking someone profusely, and she stepped around from behind the waterfall wearing black pants and a sweater. I stood up, on reflex, like someone in a hospital anxious to hear updates about a loved one.

The Outfit member at the spa reception desk, who hadn’t so much as looked my way, gave Joan the widest, toothiest grin and gushed, “You look so rejuvenated! Have a nice day and please come again soon!”

“Why thank you, yes, I will certainly be back.”

“All set?” I was already walking in the direction of the elevator. “Ready to go?”

Joan stopped. “Hello, gorgeous!” she said, grabbing my hand to stop me and giving me a once-over. “Why, look at you!”

I looked down at myself. “These are our uniforms.”

“Lovely, you look just lovely. All grown up!”

“Thanks, Joan.” I started walking again. “So, how do you feel?”

“Fantastic. Really fantastic.” Her eyes had a mellow glaze. She couldn’t stop smiling. “Have you had one of those?”

“Um, no.” I hit the elevator up button.
Up, up, up, c’mon.
“They don’t really let us. We’re mostly just working.” The elevator came and I put my hand on her back wanting to push her in, get her moving faster. I hit the button for the lobby and then the one to close the doors, shutting them right in someone else’s face, and I didn’t care.

“Well you could use one, Haven. You’re working too hard, I can tell.” The doors opened again. We were back in the lobby. “But this place is just remarkable!” She looked up at the ceiling, taking everything in. “I cannot believe this is your home.”

“This isn’t my home,” I snapped. She didn’t seem to detect the edge in my voice. She was probably still hopped up on unknown toxins from her spa trip.

“You know what I mean, silly. You’re a part of this glamorous place. How many high school students could do what you’re doing? I’m so proud of you. Now would you just look at that skylight? Magnificent!”

“Thanks, Joan.” It came out more defeated than I would’ve liked. She sat down on the ottoman holding my hand and pulling me to sit beside her. Around us, staffers fluttered by, guests flitted in and out. Two Outfit members watched us from the front desk. “I’m really sorry about lunch.”

“Look at that, you’re wearing the necklace.” She took the pendant in her hand.

“Yeah, I love it. I never take it off, actually.”

“You’re quite the lady all of a sudden, aren’t you?”

“Will you call me when you get home? Did you drive here?”

“No, I took the L this time. I wanted to shop around a little and didn’t want to worry about traffic and parking and all. Besides, I wanted to time how fast it was to get to you—pretty fast. I’ll have to get back here more often.” She winked. “But don’t worry, I’ll call first next time.”

“Great. Yeah.” There’s no way I would ever let her back in here. Ever. “Call me later? Okay?” I stood up and, luckily, she followed suit. I led us outside. “Next time I’ll get an afternoon off and we can go somewhere in the city. I spend enough time here.” My voice almost sounded believable. But I could feel my brow furrowing.

“Of course, dear, that would be wonderful!” She pulled me into a tight hug. And I hugged her back, wishing I could go with her and forget entirely about this world I had gotten sucked into. But I knew I couldn’t. “I’m so proud of you. You are just doing so well. I can’t wait to brag about you to all the ladies back at the hospital!” She let me go, but remembered: “And, oh my goodness, that Aurelia is just beautiful, and she thinks so highly of you!”

“What?”

“I just met her quickly. She said she feels like you two are cut from the same cloth and she’s so impressed with your work. Keep it up, honey!” I felt like I’d been stabbed.

“That’s great. So you met her.” I felt so much like my world had been violated and tampered with.
Please tell me Joan will be okay. I don’t care what happens to me, just let her be protected.

“Okay, well, I have an afternoon of shopping ahead of me!”

With one more hug and a kiss on the cheek, Joan strolled off in the direction of the L. I only noticed now that it was positively freezing outside, but I stood there until she was out of sight.

On my way back into the hotel, my eyes shot to the girls at the front desk. Both seemed consumed with their respective computer screens, but I could feel them glancing back at me after I walked away.

I found Neil Marlinson waiting in front of the gallery. He smiled, big and broad, when he saw me. I collected myself and waved back.

“Hello, Mr. Marlinson.”

“Neil, please,” he said warmly. “I just had to thank you, Haven, for the copy of that photo you left for me. You can’t possibly know how much it means. This . . .” He held up the printout—it was the version that had first been on the wall of the gallery, not as it looked now hidden in Aurelia’s office. “ . . . this has made my trip here worthwhile.” He held it against his chest.

“I’m glad to help,” I said, not sure I really deserved such a fuss.

“You must think I’m incredibly strange, to be so fixated on this.” He looked at the picture again. “But it looks so much like her, it’s uncanny. It’s just, well, you’ll understand this someday, but you never forget your first love. You just never do, no matter what happened to take that person out of your life.” He sounded wistful and then he caught himself. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why I’m bothering you with this.” He shook his head. A lightning bolt struck his face, an idea dancing in his eyes now. “I’d like to buy something, anything, as a thank-you.”