In a Broken Dream (The Broken Series Book 4) (16 page)

My
mom’s tears mingled with mine as she clutched me to her chest. I sank into her
arms and relinquished all the sorrow that had been bottled up inside of me
since Michael’s death. She waited for my tears to subside before asking any
more questions. “I thought Michael transferred the money from Paris. How did he
end up in Ukraine?”

I
swiped at my tear stained cheeks and sank back onto my knees. “Ethan called
Rafael when he regained consciousness. Rafael was in Paris, talking to Michael
at the time. Michael insisted on coming when he heard I was missing. Kadyn came
too.”

My
mom’s eyes grew wide. “Kadyn was there?”

I
nodded. “Rafael, Kadyn, Michael, and Maxim worked together to secure our
release. Michael was the last one to board the jet. Maxim told him not to
transfer the ransom money until after Shae and I had safely boarded the plane. The
airport looked like a war zone, Mom. There were over a hundred men standing around
the plane with machine guns. Some of the men worked for the SVR, and some were
hired by Maxim to protect the plane. The transfer went through, but the SVR
shot Michael in the back when he tried to board the jet. Rafael was shot in the
arm when he pulled Michael into the plane. The pilot took off while the SVR was
still shooting at us. Kadyn tried to save Michael, but he couldn’t stop the
bleeding.” I closed my eyes, trying to block out the image of Michael’s
bloodstained shirt. “Michael told me he loved me and then died in my arms,” I
choked back another round of tears.

My
mom tucked my head under her chin and wrapped me in her arms. We sat in silence
for the longest time. “What happened to the two men from Ukraine who were
trying to help you?” she finally asked.

“Maxim
and Konstantin survived. I haven’t spoken with Maxim since I left Ukraine. Rafael
has spoken with him a couple of times, and Shae still keeps in touch with
Konstantin,” I replied.

My
mom gave me a curious look. “Why aren’t you speaking with Maxim?”

I
sighed. “I don’t know, Mom. I just… I don’t want to mislead Maxim into thinking
there can be anything more between us, and I don’t want to do anything that
would hurt Rafael. I’ve already hurt him enough.”

“How
has Rafael been coping with Michael’s death?” she asked.

I
swiped at my cheeks again. “He’s been burying himself in his work, and he’s
become even more protective of me. He assigned another bodyguard, Jase, to
watch over me. I don’t know if he’s worried the SVR will try to kidnap me again
or if he’s expecting me to be murdered like everyone else he’s loved.”

“Everyone
else?” my mom inquired cautiously.

I
gathered the dried petals and stuffed them inside the small plastic bag. “His
parents were murdered when he was in high school. He’s the one who discovered
them.”

All
of the color drained from my mother’s face. “Oh my God! That poor man.”

I
gazed into my mother’s eyes. “He has no family to speak of now. Michael was his
last remaining relative.”

“He
has you,” my mother kindly reminded me.

I
nodded. Pain radiated from every pore as I succumbed to my tears once more. “I love
him, Mom, but I still miss Michael. I miss Michael so much it hurts.”

*
* * * *

Rafael
eased onto the hammock, tucked me against his chest, and locked me in his arms.
“You’ve been crying,” he noted softly.

“I
finally told my mom what happened in Ukraine,” I explained without opening my
eyes. I was exhausted from all of the crying. A warm breeze had been tugging at
the hammock and lulling me to sleep. “Where’s Mom and Dad?”

“They
ran to the grocery store. Your mom said she needed to pick up a chuck roast so
she could cook one of your favorite dishes tonight,” Rafael replied before
stifling a yawn.

“Roast
beef with mashed potatoes and gravy,” I surmised. Blue eyes met brown as my
eyes fluttered open. “How’d you like shooting the bow?”

Rafael
smiled a bit sheepishly. “I enjoyed learning how to use the bow, but I still
prefer guns.”

My
fingers danced along his cheek, where a patch of sunlight had broken through
the green maple leaves hanging above us. “That’s understandable, given your
line of work.”

He
caught my wrist and pressed his lips to the back of my hand. “I asked your
father for permission to marry you.”

My
heart landed with a “thump” just beneath the hammock. “You asked my father for
permission to marry me when he had a bow and arrow in his hand?”

Rafael
chuckled softly as he pulled me on top of him. “Yes.”

Desire
pooled in my abdomen and chest as he fit his body to mine. “You are a very
brave man,” I whispered breathlessly. “What did he say?”

He
gently caressed my back. “He said the only person who could grant that
permission was you.”

“Me?”
I squeaked.

Rafael
laughed. “In most cultures, it is customary for the groom to secure the bride’s
consent.” He cupped the side of my face until our lips and eyes were perfectly
aligned. “I’m not asking you here,” he warned, “but that day is coming,
Kristine. If you have any doubts or you want out, you have to tell me now. I’m
already questioning my ability to walk away from you.”

“You
said you’d never leave me,” I blurted, inexplicably panicked.

“I
won’t leave you… not willingly; but you still maintain the ability to drive me
away,” he clarified pointedly.

“Is
that what I’m doing?” I asked, truly alarmed.

He
tightened his hold on me. “I know you’re scared, Kristine; but you’ve got to
meet me halfway. You’re still holding onto Michael. Ever since he died, you’ve
been building walls around your heart. Please, baby. I want you to want this as
much as I do. Stop building walls around your heart. Allow yourself to be
happy. Trust me with your heart.”

“I
do trust you,” I argued softly. “It’s life I don’t trust.”

“Life?”
he repeated questioningly. “You’re referring to all those broken dreams,” he
said, suddenly understanding. “Pinch me.”

My
eyes widened. “What? Why?”

“I’m
not a dream, Kristine. I’m solid and true, a living, breathing thing. I am a
reality… your reality; just as you are my reality. Forget the dreams, Kristine.
You, me, us, this relationship… isn’t a dream. This is real.”

I
could feel the tension ease from my shoulders, arms, and face. “You’re not a
dream,” I repeated. “This is real.”

He
cradled my face in his hands. “That’s right. All those broken dreams were
broken for a reason. They were broken so this dream could become a reality.”

I
gazed into Rafael’s eyes while weighing his conclusions. If my marriage, my
relationship with Kadyn, or my relationship with Michael had worked out, or if Genevieve
had survived, I wouldn’t be with Rafael now. The only dream that had no bearing
either way was peacebuilding, and technically that dream wasn’t broken. Despite
all the terrible things I’d experienced in Ukraine, I was still working in
peacebuilding. Could he be right?

Rafael
captured my lips, coaxing me tenderly to believe in him. Time stood still as I wrapped
my arms around his neck and committed myself to removing all those walls I’d
been building around my battered heart.

A
thin layer of dust swirled around my scantily clad toes as my purse hit the
garage floor. I stared at my jeep… eyes wide… mouth even wider. “Rafael!” I
yelled.

He
chuckled softly. He was standing right behind me, having snuck down the stairs after
me. The stealth at which he moved was thoroughly unnerving. “What do you
think?”

I
walked a slow circle around the jeep. “Is this my jeep?”

Rafael
shoved his hands in his pockets. He was eyeing me cautiously as he leaned
against the door frame. “Yes.”

“You
had it painted?” The jet black paint reflected every object in the garage
including me.

He
laughed. “Yes.”

My
eyes snagged on the highly polished chrome wheels. “The tires are new. The rims
are beautiful.”

“The
mechanic installed a brand new transmission, engine, alternator, fuel pump,
drive shaft, front and rear axle, brakes, hoses, electrical and AC components,”
he confessed.

I
gaped at him. “He accomplished all of that in a week? How’d you get my jeep
into a mechanic when we were in Montana?”

“Jase,”
he replied. “Look inside.”

I
opened the driver’s side door and gasped. “Leather seats?”

“Heated
leather seats,” he corrected. He was grinning.

My
fingers danced along the silky smooth leather. The vehicle even smelled new.
“They installed new carpeting.”

Rafael
joined me at the side of the jeep. “The steering wheel, speakers, and stereo
are new. They also added blue tooth capability.”

“But
this is still my jeep?” I had to ask because the body style was the only thing indicating
that it could be.

He
nodded. “Look at the mileage.”

I
ducked my head inside the jeep to peek at the odometer. “It is my jeep!” I
threw my arms around Rafael’s neck. “Only you could get me a brand new vehicle
while still respecting my wishes to keep the old one.”

“Do
you like it?” he asked. “I was worried I’d requested too many changes.”

“The
jeep looks beautiful, and I’ve got seat warmers. Are you kidding me?” I kissed
him affectionately. “I’m dying to try the seat warmers.”

“It’s
seventy-four degrees outside,” he protested while laughing at me.

I
rolled my eyes. “Who cares? I’ll turn the air-conditioning up.”

Rafael
pulled me in for a more thorough kiss… a kiss that I felt clear down to my toenails.
“You better get going before I drag you back to bed. I don’t want to make you
late when it’s your first day back to work,” he finally relented.

“Thank
you,” I breathed before kissing him again. “I don’t have any classes scheduled,
so I’ll cook dinner this evening.”

“You
ready?” Jase asked. As if on cue, he’d tromped down the stairs leading into the
garage. He was carrying two stainless steel travel mugs filled with freshly
brewed coffee.

Rafael
slowly released me. “Have a good day at work.”

“I
can’t go to work without a bodyguard?” I asked for the hundredth time.

“Not
yet,” he replied. “The SVR knows where you work, and that building isn’t very
secure.”

I
stared at him, silently willing him to change his mind. I huffed out a breath
when I realized the silent treatment wasn’t going to work on him. “Okay,” I
finally conceded. I smiled as I turned to face Jase. “I’m driving!”

He
handed me one of the travel mugs, walked around the jeep, and opened the
passenger side door. “I figured as much.”

I
gave Rafael a quick peck on the cheek before jumping into the driver’s seat.
“Have a nice day at work,” I encouraged cheerily before pulling the door
closed. I sighed contentedly as I settled into the seat. “Do you want to try
the seat warmers?” I asked Jase.

He
laughed. “Sure. Why not?”

* * * * *

I
took a deep breath before stepping across the threshold of our office suite.
What I was about to do was either incredibly brave, ridiculously stupid, or
both.

“Kri!”
Alyssa shouted as she bolted from behind the reception desk. She flung her arms
around my neck. “I’m so glad you’re back. I didn’t think you’d ever come back!”
Her eyes widened as she took a step back. “Whoa. Who’s that?”

I
couldn’t help but laugh. “This is my bodyguard, Jase. Jase this is Alyssa, our receptionist,
finder of lost things, and fixer of all things broken.”

Jase
reached for her hand. “Nice to meet you. Do you always keep that door propped
open?”

“Yes,”
she responded uncertainly.

“Do
you get a lot of visitors, people who drop by unexpectedly?” Jase asked.

She
glanced at me before shaking her head. “No…”

Jase
walked a small circle around the lobby, then peered behind the reception desk. “Do
you have access to everyone’s schedule?”

Alyssa
looked stumped by this line of questioning. “Yes.”

Jase
studied her intently. “So you know when people are expected?”

“Yes,”
Alyssa confirmed. “The staff typically tells me when they’re expecting someone.”
She joined Jase behind the reception desk.

Jase
ran his hand beneath the edge of the desk. “Can we keep the main door locked
then, and open it only when visitors are expected?”

“I
think so. I’ll have to ask Paul,” Alyssa replied. “Is this because of what
happened in Ukraine?”

I
nodded. “Jase and I can take this up with Paul. I’m really sorry for the
inconvenience, Alyssa. This shouldn’t last more than a few weeks.”

Shae
breezed into the office. “Hey, Kri… Jase… Alyssa.”