In Between Dreams (18 page)

“Nooooo.”
Bailey pointed at Babette. “We should all let a little loose. Don’t you think?”

“I think I like fun Bailey,” Daniel said with a wicked grin as his eyes followed her across the room. “I
really
like her.”

twelve.

B
ailey sat on the floor leaning up against the couch playing a clumsy version of patty-cake with Daniel. Babette sat on the couch behind Bailey playing with her hair and watching Daniel and Bailey. Bailey learned within the hour that the word for vodka was the same in every language. She was feeling light and enlightened; she was relaxing. It felt like a mellow party atmosphere layered with serious overtones.

Daniel’s phone would ring every so often. “Do you have Henry?” Babette’s eyes would light up with hope, and when Halene said no, he would hear a few tactical details before hanging up. He would then pour a couple shots handing them to Babette and Bailey. Although he was drinking and obviously showing the effects, he never spilled a drop. The group would take them, throw it to the back of their throats, take a moment for it to sink in, and get back to their previous hand games.

This activity was foolish and irresponsible and everything that Bailey wasn’t, but it seemed to help Babette cope, and she’d already finished the lead list, so there wasn’t much more they could do for her. Distracting her didn’t seem like such a bad idea. Bailey knew she would need to keep her wits about her, so she decided to start passing on refills. She knew she would get harassed by Daniel, but she needed to steer the project toward calmer waters if the news turned out to be bad or inconclusive.

“Les toilettes,”
Bailey said, and stood up suddenly; she felt a little dizzy from standing up too fast but recovered somewhat quickly. Daniel walked her to the bathroom so she wouldn’t veer off her path.

“Careful, Bales.”

“I’m always careful, Daniel. Isn’t that the problem?” she asked with a wide grin and leaned into his side. “Your way isn’t too bad after all.”

She looked up at him with a dreamy glimmer in her eye. He smiled down at her and licked his lips. His eyes were tracing her face. His gaze continuously landed on her lips.

She shook her head. “You can’t kiss me,” she told him seriously. “It’s not allowed.”

“Says
who
?” he asked in a rhetorical demanding manner. His blood soaked in alcohol made it a lot easier to go for the things he wanted.

“Chemistry,” Bailey answered and rubbed her nose that had become numb due to the alcohol, and Daniel scoffed. His eyes found hers once again.

“We have plenty of chemistry,” he argued softly. Bailey could feel the chemistry between them; she had known they had a connection for a long time. But she continually pushed the feeling aside. She tried, even now in her drunken state, to push the fluttering feeling out of her gut.

“All right, then,” Bailey said with her eyebrows up. “Math.”

Daniel chuckled. “You’re drunk.”

When Daniel separated from her, she looked at him with wide questioning eyes.

“Math didn’t stop me from failing out of college. I just cheated on a couple quizzes,” he explained jokingly. “Math isn’t going to stop me from kissing you.”

He leaned down and kissed her lips softly. She thought for a moment about pulling away but couldn’t. His lips against hers felt too good. She put her hand up to his cheek and kissed him back. The soft kiss turned needy, rushed, intense. She felt his tongue graze her lips for entrance, and she allowed it. He pushed her against the wall harshly, and she moaned into his mouth.

As soon as she heard her own voice, it broke her from her hazelike state, and she put her hands on his chest and pushed him away.

“What are we doing?” she whispered, and put her hands on her knees. She had let her physical attraction to Daniel get the best of her. She stood up slowly.

Bailey had her wide, deer-in-headlights eyes trained on him. She let out a stifled breath. She felt the urge to pull him toward her and kiss him again and again. Her senses were on overload. And then she thought of Sam. Her brain went to his face. First she pictured him in that hotel room in China, where he spoke so softly to her that she thought she could fall for him. Then she pictured how hurt he would be if he knew she were drinking with Daniel, let alone kissing him.

“Les toilettes,”
she said suddenly. “Bathroom,” she repeated in English. Her voice was breathless, and Daniel nodded, letting her go. He stepped back and bowed like a French aristocrat visiting Marie Antoinette at the palace. He was playing to the location of Paris.

“Not what I thought would come out of your mouth after our first kiss, but…” Daniel trailed off as she shut the door. He turned around and leaned on it, wiping his hands over his face. He looked to his side to see that Babette had seen the exchange. She was paused in midstep. She had clearly gotten up to do something but was stunned by the interaction between Daniel and Bailey.

Daniel shot Babette a polite smile and looked down at his feet. He thought of Bailey. Strong, stubborn, beautiful. He hadn’t always been so taken by her. He’d known her since she was young. But when she was twenty, he started to see her in a new light. He saw her grow. Her gift to comfort anyone was so foreign to him. So remarkable. He was taken by her because and in spite of the fact that she was the utter opposite of him. He heard the front door open and walked toward the foyer.

Bailey stumbled on her own feet. She caught herself on the sink. “I’m good. Fine,” she promised herself. She was more under the influence than she thought.

She avoided looking in the mirror. Her mouth was agape, her eyes were wide. “Did that really happen?” she asked aloud and gulped.

After a minute, she sat on the toilet to relieve herself. When she got up, she splashed water on her face and drank some of the water from the faucet. She felt her stomach gurgle and heard voices outside the door.
Sam and Halene must be back
, she thought. Then added,
With Katherine
.

Her disdain for Katherine was rooted in jealousy. She realized that. She was tall and blond and caught the eye of every man in the room.
Both Daniel’s and Sam’s eyes would follow her as she walked back and forth. But there was something about Katherine, something else that she didn’t like. She finally looked up from the faucet to view her appearance.

She was disheveled to say the least. Her hair was a mess, her eyeliner was smudged, and her clothes looked slept in. She fixed herself up as much as she could.

When she walked out of the bathroom, she saw Sam sitting with Babette, speaking back and forth. “You’re back,” Bailey said as she walked further into the room. “Where’s Daniel?” She traced the room with her eyes. “And Halene?”

Sam looked at her and put his pointer finger over his lips. “Shh,” and then pointed to the kitchen.

Bailey walked to the swinging kitchen door before Sam pulled her back. “Why can’t I—” she began, but Sam cut her off.

“Are you drunk?” The corners of his mouth dipped in disgust, and his eyes narrowed, almost looking pained. He must have smelled the booze on her breath, and she shut her lips instantly as if she could take it back.

Bailey giggled despite herself and made the universal sign for “a little bit” with her index finger and her thumb. “I cannot believe you, Bailey Regan,” he scolded her, and it reminded her of Rodney. Rodney, the father figure that dissolved from her dreams a year ago when Halene took his place. Rodney, the man who always showed her the difference between right and wrong. Rodney, the only man who was there when her father wasn’t.

“I cannot believe you, Bailey Regan,” she mocked in a nasally voice as Sam sat her on the couch. “I’m trying to lighten up. Why is Daniel the only one allowed to have fun?” Bailey said.

“Daniel is an alcoholic who can actually hold his liquor,” Sam mumbled. He couldn’t stand Daniel; he couldn’t stand the way he drank on missions. And the way he spoke like respect wasn’t in his vocabulary. But he could function while drunk. Unlike the mess in front of him.

As if on cue, Daniel stormed into the room heading straight for Bailey. He was followed by Halene running after him, looking terrified.
His eyes were dark with anger, and he was pointing at Bailey. “What the hell, Bailey? You weren’t going to tell us about Mei?”

Bailey raised her eyebrow at Daniel. “What?”

“That you and Sam lost her?” Daniel was yelling. “You let us go on with our lives when we should have been—” Halene put her hand on Daniel’s wrist to silence his rage and Daniel clamped his mouth shut. Then he burst out, “Great. Now we have two messes to clean up.”

Halene had always had a strong effect on the whole group. She was the youngest, by far, and everyone felt the extreme need to bend to her will. She had the entire group having this paternal need to protect her. Daniel wanted to protect her from his own rage. Sam wanted to protect her from Daniel, and Bailey, she just felt the need to protect her. Always.

This had never happened before. The dream missions were connected in a way Bailey had not experienced. The missions were never connected by anything other than the people in them. A thread connecting the China mission to France had presented itself. Bailey was confused and drunk.

Bailey glared back at Daniel and stood up. “Don’t you
dare
yell at me, Daniel. I don’t know what you want from me. What can I do? A man came in with a gun and shot at us. What were we supposed to do?”

Daniel was noticeably biting his lip to keep himself from yelling. “Sober up. We’re going back to fucking China,” he said, and harshly handed her a bottle of water.

Bailey felt her nose tingle, the feeling she always felt first when she was about to cry. She clenched her jaw to keep herself from whimpering, but she didn’t know how long she would be able to hold back. Her tears quickly changed to anger.

Bailey pushed past Daniel, standing up and walking as swiftly as she could manage toward the bathroom. Once she got inside, she shut and locked the door and let her angry tears flow freely.

Bailey felt an overwhelming feeling of failure. She had never felt like this during the missions. She was normally focused, strong. She sunk to the ground and put her head on her knees and she let herself cry.
Mei is still in trouble? What the hell is going on?

Knock! Knock! Knock!

“B,” she heard Sam’s voice speaking softly from the other side of the door. “Let me in, B. I want to talk to you.”

Bailey didn’t move. She didn’t want to see him. Daniel had instructed her to sober up as if she could do it on cue. She felt the lump in her throat rise, and she began to dry-heave. She crawled to the toilet just in time.

The taste of the bile coming up from her throat was disgusting, but she knew it was better out than in. She heard Sam knocking harder and fumbling with the knob. “Bailey. You have to let me in,” he begged. She couldn’t. She couldn’t tear herself away from the toilet.

“Hold on,”
she yelled.

The knocking stopped. She wondered, briefly, if Sam knew about the kiss. Had Daniel told Sam? It seemed like something he would do. But Daniel was so livid that she couldn’t imagine him taking the time to rub it in his face. In any other circumstance, Daniel would be laughing in Sam’s face.

The vomiting came in waves. She had less than thirty seconds in between episodes, and it was so painful and awful that she didn’t want anyone to see her. Yet she wished that Sam was in there with her, holding her hair back.

Finally after five minutes, she was able to take a breath. She pulled herself up and opened the door for Sam. Sam rushed in with two bottles of water, and Daniel filed in with a mug of tea. Sam put the water down and put his hands on either side of Bailey’s face, which forced her to look at him,

“You okay?” His voice was calmer and settling. His hands on her face was a like a promise to her. Promising that he wasn’t angry with her. She might have been reading him wrong, but his hands felt nice on her face.

She nodded slid to the floor. She regretfully lost contact with Sam. She heard the toilet flush and groaned. “Sorry,” she mumbled, and took one of the bottles Sam had brought in. She ran her hand over her numb face.

Daniel moved past them in the cramped bathroom and turned on the shower. “You need to drink a whole bottle of water, and then Katherine is going to come in here and get you showered.”

Bailey objected with a grunt and looked up at Daniel as she began chugging her water. “It’s my fault,” Daniel said. “It’s my fault you got drunk, and it’s my fault we lost Mei. It’s my fault you got shot at: I’m the one who left.” He slid down the wall to sit next to her. Sam still squatted in front of her. Daniel took her hand, and Sam shot him a look. Daniel turned his gaze fully to Bailey. “I shouldn’t have yelled at you.”

Bailey shook her head. “No. You were right. We screwed up.
I
screwed up. I just couldn’t—I couldn’t figure out how to get—” Bailey was trying to put the pieces together in her mind.
Why was this happening?

“Halene and I are going to figure out what to do next. Okay?” Daniel interrupted her train of thought and handed her the mug of tea. “Drink this too. It’ll help settle your stomach.”

“Katherine is getting some painkillers for you, and she’ll be in soon,” Sam promised.

Daniel let go of Bailey’s hand and stood up. “Come on, Sammy Froufrou. Let’s give Bales her privacy.”

Sam locked his jaw and looked up at Daniel. “I’ll be right out.”

“Now isn’t the time to confess your love.” Daniel pulled at his arm, and Sam removed himself from Daniel’s grip. Daniel had a feeling Sam would try his best to sit with Bailey, comforting her, showing her who the right choice was. Daniel didn’t like it.

“But kissing Bailey when she was trashed
was
the right time?” Sam said calmly, pointing out his hypocrisy. Sam had fight in him, but he chose to be soft-spoken and intelligent with his words. Opposed to spouting off rude, and at times incorrect, remarks.

Bailey closed her eyes and put her hands over her ears. “Please stop. My head is pounding.” She felt juvenile for acting that way, but she truly did not want to deal with their bickering.