In The Company of My Sistahs (35 page)

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Authors: Angie Daniels

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Chapter 74

RENEE

T
he wedding was fit for a princess. Decorations, flowers, seven bridesmaids, and a satin designer gown that was worth more than my damn house.

I sat in the front with Pierre, feeling envious, wishing it was me up there getting ready to marry a millionaire.

Clayton came down the aisle with a beautiful woman on his arm. I saw the look of surprise before he smiled. I smiled back.

As Ayanna moved up to stand by the groom, the way they looked at each other was something I had written about many times in my romance novels but had never experienced myself.

Suddenly I felt cheated. I had been married three times. The first in my grandmother's living room, which I considered a shotgun wedding, since I didn't want to go through with it in the first place. The second had been in my basement. I knew I didn't love Troy. I just looked at him as an excuse to travel around the world. And the third was at the justice of the peace. The only emotion I felt was the excitement of knowing I could finally pursue my dream to become a published author.

Now, as I watched the two of them exchanging vows, I realized I wanted what Ayanna had. I wanted the big fairy-tale wedding on a tropical island with all my closest and dearest friends and family in attendance. But most of all I wanted to feel what they were feeling.

I know at this point you probably don't think someone like me would even know what love is or even appreciate it when I get it, but you're wrong. I want a man who makes my heart beat faster. A man that knows what I need even without telling him. A man who's a friend as well as a lover. And someone who has enough backbone to get in my ass when I need it. The way I behave I need someone to check my ass every now and again, which is the majority of the time. But most of all I wanted to look at a man the way Ayanna is looking at Alex. And I wanted a man to look at me the same way he was looking at her.

I've made a lot of mistakes in my life and broken a lot of hearts, but for once I would like to get it right. I believe everyone has a soul mate. I have yet to find mine.

By the time he saluted his bride, I was in tears. Pierre squeezed my hand.

“You okay?” he asked.

I nodded. He thought I was crying because the ceremony had been beautiful. Shit, I was crying because I wished it was me up there.

I was still feeling sorry for myself all through the meal. We had moved into a sparkling ballroom. It was beautifully done in pink and white. Ice swan, shrimp, caviar, and fine wines, not that cheap shit that we served at mine.

A large band on stage played soft music. The dance floor contained several dozen couples, spinning around the floor. Expensive perfume and colognes mingled in the air. Pierre escorted me out onto the floor. I have to admit, at his age he was an excellent dancer.

“Thank you for coming,” he said close to my ear. “Gloria is practically foaming at the mouth.”

I glanced over my shoulder at his wife, who he had introduced me to when we had first arrived. Her greeting was far from friendly. Now she was staring at us from across the dance floor. I kissed the side of Pierre's neck and gave her a triumphant smile.

“Don't start nothing you can't finish,” Pierre warned.

I playfully rolled my eyes at him. “Don't get excited, old man. I did it to make your wife mad.” He chuckled and I laughed with him. I knew he was just playing. Last night Pierre had been a perfect gentleman. After he took me back to his suite, we spent most of the evening talking about our failed relationships. It was so nice to have an unbiased opinion for a change. However, the way he was going on and on about Gloria, despite the fact she had cheated on him, he still loved her.

Speak of the devil. Gloria and her date moved onto the floor and fell into step. Her date had two left feet and kept stepping on her dress. Pierre and I chuckled, but despite his laughter I could tell by the way he was watching, as much as he tried to hide it, he wasn't over his wife.

The music changed to R. Kelly's “Step in the Name of Love.” I stopped dancing and pulled Pierre off the floor.

“Sorry, Pierre, I'm not a stepper. Why don't you go rescue your wife?” I pointed toward her and her nondancing partner.

His eyes sparkled. “You sure?”

“Positive.”

I stepped over near the crowd and watched him move over to Gloria and offer her a dance. She gladly left her partner standing there and joined her husband. As I watched the two of them move, they were like a black Ginger Rogers and Fred Astaire. They moved beautifully together.

“Care to dance?”

I swung around to find Clayton standing behind me. I smiled, then nodded. He couldn't dance so I knew I didn't have to worry about him showing me out on the floor. I stepped into the circle of his arms and together we simply swayed from side to side.

“I guess you know your girl played me.”

“Yeah, I heard something about that.”

“I feel like such a fool.”

“We all play the fool once. Ain't no way I would have dumped you for that no-neck mothaâ” I stopped, remembering how he felt about my nasty mouth. “preacher.”

He looked at me and grinned. “Yeah, I guess you're right.” He pulled me into the circle of his arms.

I don't know what Kayla was smoking to even think about letting a man like this go. Now look at this picture. Kayla is overweight, with low self-esteem and two kids with two different baby's daddies. I mean, I have never seen her with a man that even remotely came close to what Clayton had and could offer her. Not only was he fine, but he had money. To top it off, he wasn't trying to fuck every which way; he was saving himself for someone special. You can't beat that.

In the back of my mind I'm dancing and thinking, this brotha is now free game. However, after my disappointment with Solomon, I just don't think I can deal with another upset. All I want to do is get through the next day and go the fuck home. However, just thinking about him made my stomach lurch. I was still hurting deeply from his words. I hope by saying I don't give a fuck, I will eventually believe it myself.

As Clayton held me in his arms, I realized why he had chosen Kayla over me, and I have to agree. Even though Kayla pissed me the fuck off, she is a beautiful woman inside and out. And that is what Clayton deserved. Only my girl has too many issues, so he needs to keep looking.

As much as I wanted to meet my soul mate and wished it was Clayton, I knew he was not.

The song came to an end. I thanked him and went in search of Pierre. I found him and his wife still on the dance floor, lost in each other's eyes. Smiling, I spun on my heels and headed back to my room.

Chapter 75

RENEE

T
he three of them had gone to Negril for the day. I was glad because that allowed me some time alone.

I took a seat out on the balcony and decided it was as good a time as any to think about my future.

I know I need to quit putting the shit off and just tell John it's over, yet I keep thinking if I just try a little harder and quit fucking around on the man everything is going to be all right.

But I know that isn't true. I can honestly say I was faithful for the entire first twelve months of our marriage. Not once did I mess around. However, as soon as summer rolled around again, I got a wild hair up my ass and decided I was ready to hit the club scene again. As soon as I saw all the fine brothas trying to holler it was downhill ever since.

Last night I think I finally realized why it has been so hard for me to tell him it's over: it's because deep down I really feel like I owe him something. Now stay with me a minute. He asked me to marry him when I was down on my luck. I had just lost my job and was having heart palpitations with no medical insurance to check it out.

Now that everything in my life is great, I don't need him anymore and I feel guilty about it.

Feeling hot and sleepy I moved back into the room and decided to take a quick shower followed by a nap. I stripped out of my shorts and top, then stepped into the shower. Tears sprang to my eyes as I thought about the look on John's face when I tell him it is over. I just can't bear to hurt him because he has been so good to me. No man has ever treated me so good and probably no one else ever will. Why can't I love him? I have asked God that question so many times over the last several years, yet I never seem to get an answer. I don't understand why the good guys always finish last. If John had been some knucklehead that was hitting me upside my head and trying to take my money, I would be crazy over that fool. The only peace I can feel is knowing that by me letting him go, I am allowing him the opportunity to meet someone who will love him the way he deserves to be loved.

I shed a few more tears, then turned off the water and wrapped my body in a towel. I was sitting on the bed rubbing lotion on my body when I heard a knock on the door.

I tightened the towel around me and opened the door.

“Clayton.” I gasped as my eyes quickly roamed over his body. He was dressed in navy cotton shorts and a tight white t-shirt that showed off his body.

“Hi, is Kayla here?”

“No, she's ... she's not here.” I started to tell him that she was now staying across the hall, but fuck it, I don't owe her ass shit.

“Oh.” He looked disappointed.

“Why don't you come on in and wait?”

He hesitated for less than five seconds before he moved into the room. With his back turned, I smiled, then closed the door. I took his hand and led him to the bed and told him to take a seat.

“Whassup?”

“I don't know why I came. I was just hoping to talk to Kayla.”

“She and I aren't speaking.”

“Why?”

“'Cause her ass is stupid. She dumped you to be with that no good preacher of hers.”

“Yeah,” he murmured.

“That's what you get for passing up a real sistah like me for a wet dream.”

He started laughing. “You are too much.”

“Yes, I am.” We both laughed and got comfortable. Then everything got serious again.

The mere thought of him making love to me made my heart beat rapidly. I decided to be bold and dropped down on my knees in front of him, then leaned forward and pressed my lips to his. I half expected him to decline but was pleased when he did not. I thought about Kayla and knew what I was doing was wrong, but at this point what did it matter? She fucked him over for some no-neck mothafucka, not me. My desire for Clayton became so overwhelming nothing else mattered.

I darted my tongue in and out of his mouth, tasting him. With my tongue in his mouth, I reached inside and pulled his dick out. Yes! He was hung. I stroked him between the palms of my hand, then when I felt the first drop of precum I leaned down and captured the head in my mouth. He tried to stop me but once my lips touched the head it was all she wrote.

He gritted his teeth. “Dang, you've got skills!” He nearly came off the bed as a moan tore from his lips.

I sucked the tip of him and stroked the length of his dick, dipping my fingers inside his boxers and between his legs to caress his balls. His dick throbbed in my mouth as I sucked him long and hard. His moans became faster and he rocked against my mouth. I knew that he could come soon, so I stopped.

Slowly I dropped the towel and stood before him naked, waiting for him to make the next move.

That celibate shit went out the window the minute he rose and slipped out of his shorts. He scooped me up and lowered me onto the bed. He parted my thighs and positioned himself between them, then filled me completely and a shout tore from my lips. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him down to me. He pounded into me and I moved my hips, matching each of his strokes. He pumped wildly, sending me over the edge. I closed my eyes and gave into the feeling. It was sensational, unreal. The fire came over me, stealing my breath. I dug my fingertips into his back and held on. He thrust deeper inside of me. I shuddered and convulsed and milked him with my spasms.

The brotha had skills, because I experienced the best orgasm of my life.

He then kissed me and held me in his arms. “Was it good for you?”

I was too tired to speak so I nodded. It was that wonderful feeling you get after a powerful orgasm.

A half hour passed and I could have laid there in his arms forever, and would have if I hadn't remembered that Clayton was supposed to have been Kayla's man and Lisa was my roommate and she was going to have a fit if she found out.

I was ready to send him away when I felt his dick grow hard again.

I climbed on top of him, positioned my coochie over his dick, then lowered over his hard shaft. Resting my hands on his chest, I lifted up and down again and again. He grabbed onto my waist and moved with me. It felt so good I didn't hear anything but the sound of skin slapping against skin. I was so oblivious to everything else that I didn't hear Lisa slide the key in the lock.

“Oh shit!”

My eyes snapped open and my gaze darted to the door, where Lisa was standing. A second later Nadine, followed by Kayla's head, peeked through the door.

“What's wrong?” I heard Kayla ask.

I saw the moment Kayla realized what was going on.

I jumped off of Clayton. He also jumped off the bed.

Kayla pushed her way past the other two and got all up in Clayton's face. “How could you?”

He looked scared as shit. “I ...”

I stepped my naked ass between them and stared her down. “Excuse me, but he ain't got to answer to your ass. You played him, remember?”

“Get the hell out!” Kayla screamed.

Lisa shook her head. “Clayton, you better leave.”

He quickly slipped into his clothes. Despite the problems in the room, all eyes were on Clayton's dick as he reached for boxers. The tension didn't return until he left the room.

I moved to the dresser and reached for my clothes.

“How could you fuck Clayton?”

“Shit. Your ass didn't want him,” I snipped as I slipped a sundress over my head.

“And that made it all right?”

“Bitch, you decided to take Leroy's ass back. That mothafucka is screwing every fat bitch in town. You are just one of many. He plays on your insecurity, only you are too stupid to realize that.”

Nadine tried to defuse the situation and dropped a hand to my shoulder. “Y'all need to quit tripping.”

I pushed her hand away. “You need to shut your dyke-ass up! If you put your hands on me one more time I'm gonna fuck you up.”

“You are trifling.” Kayla stuck her finger in my face. I snapped my head back. No, the bitch didn't put her finger in my face.

“Bitch, you would want to get out my face before I hurt you.”

Nadine, Kayla, and I all started shouting at the same time. The first one who touched me, it was on and popping.

“Stop it! Stop it!”

We all grew silent. I glanced over at my sister, who was leaning over holding her stomach.

“Stop it, all of you. This is not why I asked y'all here.”

I clicked my tongue. “Why the fuck did you ask us here? That's what I want to know.”

I noticed that tears were streaming down her face. After a few moments, she said, “I have cancer.”

It took a moment for her words to register. “What?”

“I have cancer,” she repeated as she lowered her weary body onto the bed.

This was un-fucking-believable. “I can't believe this shit! You flew me down here so you could tell me you've got cancer.”

She returned her gaze to me and said, “No. I flew you down here so I could tell you I have to have surgery.”

We were all stunned to silence.

Confused, I didn't blink. Kayla was the first to speak. “Cancer?” she whispered. “What kind of cancer?”

“Ovarian cancer.”

There was pain on Kayla's face.

I finally found my voice. “You had me fly all the way down here just so you could tell me this shit.”

“No, I flew you down here to tell you my cancer has come back and I have to have surgery again.”

“Again? What do you mean again, 'cause this is the first I've heard of it?”

“I was first diagnosed three years ago. That's why I had the hysterectomy.”

“Oh God!” Kayla cried. She burst out in tears, then dashed into the bathroom.

I couldn't believe this. My sister had never bothered to tell me that she had cancer.

Nadine moved next to Lisa and placed a comforting hand on her shoulders. The look in her eyes told me she was not the least bit shocked to hear of Lisa's illness.

“This is bullshit.”

Nadine intervened. “Renee, listen to what she has to say.”

“You stay out of this.” I glanced over as she gave Lisa an I-told-you-so-look. “Wait a cotton pickin' minute. You knew?”

Nadine didn't say anything, but her silence spoke volumes. “I can't believe this shit! This dyke knew what was going on before I did.”

“I just told her yesterday,” Lisa wearily admitted.

“You confided in this dyke before you confided in your own sister. This is a bunch of bullshit!”

Nadine stepped in. “Renee, this is not the time.”

“Bitch, fuck you. This is between me and my sister!”

“Renee, I didn't want to worry you. That's why I never said anything.”

Kayla was crying so loud all of us could hear her. I wanted to scream and tell her to shut the hell up. That's not your sister who has a serious illness, it's mine. All mine.

“Who are you to decide what to tell me? I am a grown-ass woman.” Tears filled my eyes. I headed for the door. Nadine stood between me and freedom.

“Renee, you needâ”

“What you need to do is get out the way before I fuck you up.”

“Fuck you,” she spat with venom.

“No, fuck you.” I quickly reached for my shoes, ignoring Lisa, who was urging me to calm the fuck down.

Kayla stepped out of the bathroom, wiping her nose.

I moved toward the door. “Kayla, move your ass so I can get out.”

She shook her head. “Renee, I think you need to shut up and listen to what your sister has to say.”

“No, what I need to do is get the fuck out of here because obviously Lisa doesn't need me, not when she has the two of you. Now get the fuck out of my way before I push your fat ass onto the floor!”

When she moved to the side I knew I had hurt her feelings, but so what? What about my feelings? For once someone needed to think about how I felt. As soon as I bolted through the door, I stormed out the hotel and not once looked back.

I spotted Everton as I was going through the patio area.

“Renee, I was looking for you.”

I grabbed his shirt and dragged him along with me. “Good, I was looking for you, too.”

“Where are we going?”

“Just shut up and come with me.”

I entered the building and dragged him up to the laundry room. I didn't care who saw us or if he got in trouble. All I cared about was forgetting.