In the Life (36 page)

"What the hell are you doing?" Alonzo exclaimed as he saw Sherrod put the gun down the back of his pants.

"Jackson needs me," Sherrod said plainly.

"What the fuck do you mean Jackson needs you. I need you! Where are you going?"

"Like I said, he needs me. I will explain when I get back." Sherrod rushed past Alonzo in route for the door. Alonzo trailed him unsatisfied with his answer.

"You got a gun and walking out this house like we ain’t
have plans so you going to explain now! What was that phone call about? You got time to play gangsta, but no time for me."

"I will tell you later," Sherrod pronounced undeterred by Alonzo's complaints.

"You must like that nigga." Alonzo's words stopped Sherrod as he was opening the door. "What? Do you love Jackson or something? You about to kill for him? Or are you just about to die for him?" Sherrod looked back at Alonzo. He mulled over what Alonzo had just said.

"Whatever it takes." And Sherrod closed the door leaving Alonzo fuming.

"How can I shake him?" That was all that Jackson was thinking during his mini high speed chase. He had been doing like Sherrod had advised him to do. At every opportunity, Jackson had taken every off ramp, back road, and exit to get away from Tracy, but not even a red light would stop the hot pursuit. This was crazy!

The sounds from the radio were needless. It wasn't even providing a soundtrack to the mayhem. Jackson's mind was on only one thing and it wasn't R. Kelly's newest remix.

"Hello?" Jackson answered his ringing phone after the first ring. It was Sherrod, his savior. Well, at least Jackson hoped that Sherrod could fulfill that title.

"Where you at?"

"I just took the exit to go to Sox and 35th. This dude ain’t buzzing. You at State Street yet?"

"Damn, you went far! But naw, I ain't there yet. Double back and come back. We should be there when you get there."

"We?"

"Yeah, just hold tight. Everything is cool." Sherrod hung up the phone and looked over to his right. Riding with him on the bus was Alonzo. He had chased after him in somewhat boiling rage. Sherrod couldn't understand why Alonzo was tripping so much. Their friend was in trouble. Shouldn't they both be concerned?

"You like him like that?" Alonzo asked while looking straight ahead.

"Huh?" Sherrod did not want to have this conversation here, especially not on a bus full of folk.

"You heard me. Jackson. Do you like him?"

"We are not about to have this conversation here."

"No, this is the perfect time to be talking about this shit." Alonzo turned to face his man. Sherrod looked stressed and agitated, but he didn't care. He wanted to get to the root of the issue. "You riding all cavalier and shit to be with him, you want the nigga? Don't even lie to me."

"Why does it got to be all of that?" Sherrod purposely avoided the question.

"Because it is. I see how yall are together. I know yall knew each other before, but that is some foul ass shit. That shit is on both of yall. You fucking him! I know that shit without having to have a picture, confession, or fucking sex tape. Only that kind of shit would have you leaving the house while you on some serious type shit with your man. Admit it!"

"So why are you here?" Sherrod knew his response was both disrespectful and an admission of guilt. At this point, why deny anything?

"Why am I here?" Alonzo said incredulously. "I am here because my nigga decided to up and leave me during an emotional crisis for some bullshit with my roommate. Damn it, something juicy sho better be happening for all this shit to be going down. You are mine and NOT HIS!" Alonzo made sure to pronounce and overly emphasize every word in the last statement. Sherrod nervously looked around to make sure no one heard their conversation. The whole situation made him appreciate Jackson's style even more.

"Cool your ass down, Alonzo," he tried to say in a calm and even tone.

"Does it look like I am calm, motherfucker! You fucking my roommate!" Alonzo was loud enough for everyone to hear. Many of the passengers turned around to see the drama going on in the back of the bus. Sherrod wanted to shrivel up and die, but he didn't show it. He was a man and would always carry himself as one.

"We are like six stops away. Can you please be civil until then and not cause a BIGGER scene?"

Alonzo relaxed back in his seat for a moment. But only for a moment. He was not the type of fag who normally caused an emotional, public extravaganza but emotions were running high. He was beyond pissed, annoyed, and betrayed. How could Sherrod continue to sit there and brush the shit off? Brush him off? Alonzo would play cool for now. But only for now.

Jackson made it to 79th and State Street. As he pulled into the gas station, he looked everywhere for Sherrod, but he didn't see him. Jackson didn't know what to do and Tracy was right behind him. He tried to act natural. Jackson pulled up to a gas pump and exited his car as if he was going inside to pay for gas. Tracy parked his car and didn't get out. A devious set of eyes were on Jackson as he entered the store. He immediately grabbed for his cell phone once he was inside. Where was Sherrod? There was no answer the first two times when he tried to call. It was going straight to voicemail. Was Cingular trying to play some sick joke here with his phone service?

After ten minutes of stalling in the store, Jackson decided to get back to his car. He couldn't hide forever. Tracy started unbuckling his seatbelt as soon as the sliding doors parted to let Jackson exit. Across the way, Jackson saw a 79th Street bus pull up with Sherrod jumping out. Alonzo was right behind him.

"Why you trying to run from me?" Tracy asked as he got out his car. "I just wanted to talk to you."

"But I don't want to talk to you," Jackson answered as he continued to his car. He both dreaded and hoped that this encounter was drawing attention. He might need the witnesses.

"Jackson, just come with me for a minute." Tracy aggressively started marching his way. Sherrod's steps became a little quicker.

"He said leave him alone!" Sherrod called out causing Tracy to notice his presence.

"What the fuck? Aww hell naw, nigga. You ain't got nothing to do with this shit."

"I think I do." Sherrod reached back and grabbed his gun. Tracy also rose his shirt up and grabbed for the gun that he had tucked away in the front of his pants.

"No, please!" Jackson called out but the sound of a loud blast silenced his thoughts.

Jackson was startled by the loud explosion that had just
rang out. The sound of the bus backfiring nearby almost made him have a heart attack. Neither man even winced at the noise.

A terrifying feeling overtook Jackson's body. As if through an out of body experience, he could see himself standing frozen in place as he helplessly watched Sherrod and Tracy marching towards each other with guns revealed. Alonzo's steps were short and slow. He was too taken aback by the event in progress. However, he was no fool. He made sure that he was not directly behind Sherrod or close to the line of fire. Alonzo was definitely not trying to be admitted into no one’s emergency room that night.

"Guys, what are you doing? This is stupid!" Jackson's words fell on deaf ears. "Please God, stop this from happening. Please fix my mess," he began to pray to himself.

Jackson wasn't sure if it was the answer to his prayers, but a police car pulled up into the gas station parking lot just as Tracy held his gun a little higher. Two cops jumped out of the vehicle with their own guns cocked and aimed at Tracy.

"Put it down now!" One of the cops yelled.

Sherrod quickly tucked his gun back in his pants and began to retreat. At first, it was slow backward steps, but it turned it into a sprint. His movement brought one of the cops attention to him.

"Stop!" The cop yelled before taking off behind him. Jackson's attention was divided between Tracy's cop standoff and Sherrod fleeing the scene. Jackson kept his eyes on Sherrod until he and the policeman were out of sight. Back to Tracy, he refused to lower his weapon which was still pointed in the direction that Sherrod once was.

"Oh shit, that nigga got a gun!" Jackson heard someone scream. He watched as many people ran to safety while some inched closer to see the action. A second cop car pulled onto the scene with two more policemen jumping out.

The scene was getting deep, but still Jackson's feet stayed planted outside of the gas station's front entrance. Jackson's eyes scanned the parking lot for Alonzo, but he had vanished.

"Lower the gun, son!"

Tracy's expression was unreadable. Was he afraid at all? Nervous? Jackson couldn't tell.

"Drop the gun and put your hands behind your head!" The original cop spoke again.

He inched closer to Tracy with his gun still in front of him. Tracy made a sharp movement and turned the gun towards the approaching policeman. As a reaction, the two cops new to the scene pulled their triggers. The other one did as well startled by the gunfire. With two shots to the chest and one to the leg, Tracy fell to the ground. An almost inhumane sound escaped Jackson's mouth. Finally, he was able to take a step forward. The one step turned into a sprint towards Tracy's body. The police jogged to him as well. One cop took the gun out of his limp hand while another checked his pulse. He felt nothing.

Jackson took a long car ride home. He needed to clear his head. The police grilled him at the station about what was going on. He explained to them about the stalking, but left out Sherrod's name. During the ride back, he tried calling Sherrod several times, but there was no answer. All calls went straight to voicemail.

Sitting on the sofa, Jackson rocked back and forth jumping at every sound outside the front door. When was Sherrod coming home? Was he alright? Had he met the same fate as Tracy? That last thought caused a tear to form. Jackson cried as he said a silent prayer. He couldn't remember the last time he had prayed so much in one day.

The sun was coming up by the time that Jackson heard a key in the door. He had fallen asleep on the sofa waiting. It had not been a good sleep. It had been filled with so many frightening dreams.

"Sherrod? Where the hell have you been? I tried to call you, but you didn't answer. Tracy is dead. They shot him like three times and I had to go down to the police station. I have been worrying all night about where you were. Why didn't you answer your damn phone?"

"I am sorry, babe. My phone died and... Tracy is dead?"

"Yeah," Jackson said solemnly. Sherrod walked over and wrapped his strong arms around him. "He was pronounced dead on the site. There was so much blood."

"But are you okay?"

"Yeah." Jackson melted in the warmth of the embrace. "Now that you are here."

"You know, me and Alonzo are officially over. You can imagine that he did not take the news well," Sherrod said after a long moment of silence.

"I guess that means that we can really work on us now." Jackson turned and gave Sherrod a kiss. For the first time, he was able to kiss the man that he cared for without guilt or shame. It was just the two of them.

The lovers broke the kiss and small sweet kisses were scattered all over. Sherrod was the one to stop things before it got any more hot and heavy.

"Baby. baby! We got forever to finish this, but right now all of that running has me hungry as hell. You wanna go out to grab some breakfast?" Jackson nodded and smiled. His smile made Sherrod smile even harder.

When Sherrod and Jackson made their way downstairs, they were horrified to see Jackson's car. All of the windows had been broken in, the doors were dented, and an empty bag of sugar laid on the ground right by the gas tank. Alonzo had definitely been there to pay an unfriendly visit.

In unison, Jackson and Sherrod exclaimed the same statement.