In the Shadow of Love (25 page)

Anxious all day and night she was eager, yet afraid, for the test results.  At the doctor’s office the next day she patiently tolerated the barrage of other tests her doctor had ordered, which painfully reminded her how much poking and prodding they did during her last pregnancy.

“I’m classifying you as a high-risk pregnancy from the very beginning this time, Maggie, given your past history of conceiving twins.”  Dr. Preston’s voice was firm.  “And I want you to call me with any questions you have.  After all, you’re older now and I don’t want to take any chances with this pregnancy.”

Her doctor’s words fought through her still stunned brain.  “The nurse will be in soon to schedule you for a series of follow-on tests and appointments.”   She heard the door close as she struggled with her desire to tell someone about her news and her concern about telling the one person she most needed to tell.

Returning home she was armed with a stack of pamphlets containing information on high-risk pregnancies, and a series of appointments scheduled for the next few months.  She still didn’t know how she felt about telling anyone before she told Morris.

That evening at dinner, boys noticed how distant she was.  She reassured them that everything was okay and distracted them with homework.  As she lay in bed that night, she worked through all the scenarios for her future, except the one without Morris.  Sleep finally saved her from facing that possibility.

The next morning, looking out her window as the school bus pulled away she saw a familiar car turn the corner.  Morris was back!  Her heart leapt as he parked the car and walked quietly towards her house.  He looked tired.  Opening the door she was face to face with the man with whom she had shared the most intense days of her life.

“Hi.”  He spoke first.

“Hi.”  She whispered back.

“May I come in?”

“Of course.”  Stepping aside she waited as he crossed the threshold of her life once more.

Closing the door she waited for him to make the next move.  He gathered her in his arms and kissed her as if he would drink up her very soul.

“I have so much to tell you,” his voice almost husky from fatigue.  He released her reluctantly and pulled her hand upwards, kissing her palm.  Touching her face, he soothed the pain away from her wounds.   “Is there somewhere we can talk?”

“You look like you could use a strong cup of coffee.”  She led him into the kitchen where so much of their time together had been spent.

“You read my mind.”  He pushed her gently into the kitchen chair, poured two cups of coffee and joined her.  She nudged her cup away from her.  He didn’t know she wasn’t drinking coffee these days.

Suddenly impatient she asked, “So, what did you want to talk about?” folding her arms as if she could shield herself from what he was about to say.

“Us.”   He sipped his coffee as if preparing for his next words, “–and our future.”

She didn’t know what to expect but wanted some answers before she told him about the baby.  “Morris, where have you been?”

“I went to see my kids.”  He paused, waiting for her reaction.

“And how did that go?”  She stayed as calm as she could, and neutral.

“Not very well – at first.”  He ran a hand through his hair, sadness washing over his features and making them look harsher than normal.  “I had to hire an attorney just to see them.”

Maggie’s stomach tightened as Baxter’s words “Dead-beat dad” echoed in her brain.  But she knew that wasn’t part of Morris’ character - it couldn’t be.  She couldn’t love someone who would abandon his own children.

Morris stood suddenly and proceeded to pace angrily across her tiled floor.  “When their mother first moved them to California I did everything I could to keep them in my life and stay in theirs but she was determined to undermine that at every turn.  Then I just got busy and angry – and time slipped away.”  He stopped and held her gaze.  “Then I met you.”

She held her breath trying to absorb what his words meant for her – and for him.

“And I realized that I wasn’t the best person I could be in terms of my relationship with my kids.”  He continued pacing.  “That’s why I had to go to California and confront my past and let my kids know who I am and what I stand for.”

Sitting down he reached across the table and pulled her hands into the warmth and protection of his own.  “And because I couldn’t bear to disappoint someone as special as you.”

A roller coaster ride of emotions surged through her.  Her heart told her that he was a caring and decent man but her head screamed at her to run away as fast as she could.  Her eyes searched his for answers and she remembered the first time she lost herself in the way he looked at her.

“I love you, but I’m afraid,” her voice choked with emotion.  It was the truth and that’s what she needed from him, the truth – plain and simple.

“Me too.”  He squeezed her hands before letting them go.  “So, ask away.”

She sat up taller in her chair.  “What do you mean?”

“I know you have questions but let me answer one right away – yes, I’ve always paid my child support and more.  I’ve been very generous where my kids are concerned, at least financially.  Now I want to give them what money can’t buy.”

“Time with their dad.”  She said the words knowingly.  It was what she wanted for her own children and why she had worked so hard to keep both parents in their lives.

“I saw the letter, or at least the envelope, from the IAB the day we went to Owen’s cabin.”  She spat the words out before she could stop herself and watched as he leaned back in the chair.

“Why didn’t you ask me about it then?”

She didn’t answer realizing now that she should have asked rather than let it fester all this time.

Leaning forward he captured her hands in his.  “Maggie, I don’t want any secrets between us.  None!  So, if you have questions you need to ask them.”  His eyes pleaded with her to agree.  He leaned back in his chair as the silence hung thickly in the air between them.  He took a deep breath and tried to explain.

“IAB had agreed with Lieutenant Baxter’s finding that my partner was on the take.  I challenged it and the letter was sent to let me know that in the absence of further proof their finding would stand.  They also made it clear that I was to drop any further efforts to investigate on my own, something I vowed to never do.  Then you called and the rest is history.  Everyone now knows it was Baxter who was on the take and that he planted evidence to frame my partner – and killed him.”

He detected a slight reaction and the distance between them lessening – just a little.

“You have that far-away look in your eyes,” he challenged softly.

“There’s just so much we still don’t know about each other,” she struggled to hold back her tears, wanting everything to be different, perfect.  “I mean, I don’t even know your first name.  What kind of woman am I that I slept with a man whose first name I don’t even know!”  She stood and turned away running a shaky hand through her hair.  “You must think I’m – I mean, how could I just–,” her last words were cut off as he was suddenly beside her.  He turned her around, gathered her in his arms and kissed her in a way that took her breath away, and if she had been wearing socks, would have knocked them off.

“Alexander James Morris, the Third.”

She heard the words but couldn’t process them as she breathlessly waited for him to kiss her again.

“Huh?”

Then he did – running his tongue over her mouth and plunging deep inside, leaving no doubt that he intended to get to know every inch of her.

“Alexander–“ kiss, “James–“ another kiss, “Morris–“ and another kiss, “the Third.”

She melted, holding onto him, her entire body melding with his until they were almost inseparable.  He kissed her again and this time they both explored and savored the pleasure of each other, closing the distance of the past few weeks.

Reluctantly pulling back she looked up at him, her eyes now misty with a happiness words could not explain.  “Is there a fourth?”

“A fourth what?”  His words escaped between trails of kisses along her mouth and then her neck.

“A fourth Alexander James Morris.”  It was a mouthful.

“No - two beautiful daughters - twins.”

“Well, there just might be a fourth.”

His kisses stopped but his mouth stayed against her skin, his breath caressing her neck in a way that made her want to drag him upstairs.

“Did you say twin daughters?”  His words finally caught up with her racing thoughts.

“What do you mean there might be a fourth?”  They spoke in stunned unison.

“Congratulations, Dad.”  She pulled his hand to her stomach that was still flat but awaiting the customary baby bump.

When he didn’t respond she became concerned.

“Morris did you hear what I said.”

He pulled his hand from hers and grabbed her up and carried her to the couch in the living room, kneeling beside her.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”  Her voice was hesitant, still uncertain about his feelings.  “The doctor confirmed it with a second test.”  She tried to read his body language, “A penny for your thoughts.”

“I’ll tell you someday.”  He teased.  “Say in about fifty years.”

“What makes you think I’ll wait that long,” she teased back.

“Because I’m never gonna give you a reason not to.”

Then cupping her face in his hands he kissed her long and hard.  Straightening, he positioned himself like a knight before a queen.

“Maggie Faraday - will you marry me?”

She flung her arms around his neck and held on tight.  “Yes, yes and yes.”  Her voice held as much love for him as her eyes did.

“I hope you’re ready to have an expanded family,” he said huskily in between returned kisses as he worked his way towards her neck.  “My girls are coming for the summer.”  He held her so tight that she felt his fear at letting her go.

“Well it just might be larger than you think.”  She replied sheepishly nuzzling his neck in return.  “After all, there are twins on both sides!”

He pulled back just enough to make eye contact, a satisfied but loving look on his face.  “At least it will be an even number, and just think, we could start our own sports team,” his mood was content and infectious.

No longer in the shadows, Maggie felt bathed in the sunshine of his love and looked forward to a life with the man who helped her step into the light and away from the darkness of the past.