In Too Deep (22 page)

“So what did you find, Seth?” Rafe asked as he dished himself up seconds.

Audra enjoyed watching the Kincaid brothers wolf down the dinner she'd prepared. She was amazed at the satisfied feeling she got from caring for her family. True, Julia had helped, but this meal came from Audra's own kitchen.

Seth looked up from his plate. “Just the usual. Carrots, potatoes, beef.” He glanced over at Audra. “The gravy is really good. You're a great cook.”

“Thanks, Seth.”

“I don't want to know what you found in the stew.” Rafe set his fork down with a sharp
click
. “I want to know what you and Steele found.”

Ethan exchanged a glance with Audra, then turned his smile on Seth. “You told us you'd done some tracking during the war. Hunting men, not just following game trails. You should have been able to read a lot from those tracks.”

“There were two of 'em, just like we figured.”

Audra gave Ethan an encouraging smile.

He shrank away as he looked at his little brother. “We know there were two of them. They were shooting at us. Hard to not count two gunmen.”

“They circled around the clearing on horseback.” Seth frowned at his plate as if his vegetables were misbehaving. “You heard Steele tell how they'd covered their horses' hooves.”

Seth reached for another slice of bread and buttered it as if he were creating a great work of art.

Rafe started drumming his fingers on the table, poorly concealing his impatience. “Anything else?”

“Oh yes, there was one other thing.” Seth looked up, suddenly excited, eager. He turned to Julia. “Can we go back to your place tomorrow and get back to exploring that cavern? I want to show you that cave. I know you're going to love—”

“Seth!” Rafe cut him off.

“What?” Seth took a hearty bite of bread and seemed genuinely curious as to what Rafe might want.

“We're not done talking about those tracks.”

With a shrug and wide-eyed innocence, Seth said, “Sure we are. I don't know nothing.”

Rafe's eyes narrowed and he looked about ready to start barking out orders.

“Why'd you climb that tree today?” Ethan had his smile back.

It was that moment, that question, which diverted Rafe from his anger and Seth from his craziness, when Audra realized what Ethan's smile meant. He gave a very good show of being a man who didn't care about a thing. But he did care. And what he cared about was peace. He wanted a peaceful life. He had a brother who was a wild man and another who could give Napoleon lessons on being dictatorial.

Ethan kept the peace by changing the subject with a smile, drawing his brothers back from the brink.

Audra wondered just how heavy a burden Ethan carried in trying to keep his family together. And the fact that he'd left, been the first to leave in fact, when he loved his brothers and his home so much, said just how unbearable that burden must have become.

“I went up to the treetop,” Seth said.

“Like a giant squirrel.” Ethan laughed.

Audra could see the worry behind the teasing.

Shrugging off the squirrel comment, Seth went on, “I learned in the war that men don't usually look up. I could be ten feet above a bunch of Confederate soldiers and just sit there in the tree and listen. I'd do my best to hide, but it got so I wasn't real scared even if I
was
visible. They'd never notice me sitting up there.”

“You said you scouted behind enemy lines, right?” Ethan kept smiling but it wasn't just an effort to head off Rafe's temper now. He was clearly interested to learn more about Seth's war years. She wanted to know, too.

“I did it from the first, but I kept getting promoted, so they let me go out in the field less and less.”

“How high a rank did you reach?” Rafe asked.

Seth's brow furrowed. “I went up, then down, then back up again.”

“Are we talking about your army rank or climbing trees?” Ethan grinned.

Seth smiled back. “Rank. I was a captain for a while. But I hated it. I didn't want to give anyone orders. I said some things, complained about some stupid orders we'd been given, and went back down. Then I did something some general liked and I went back up. The officers above me would order me to order the troops into battle. Well, I didn't want to send them out somewhere they might get shot. So I was a lousy captain, or maybe a lieutenant . . . I might've been a major for a while. Which of those is highest?” Seth looked at Rafe as if Rafe might know Seth's rank.

“So today you went up in the treetop to get closer to those outlaws?” Audra prompted Seth before he started storing nuts for the winter.

“I think . . .” Seth's voice faded, then he went on sounding helpless. “I hate war. I got so hungry. And it hurts to get shot. Almost as bad as the burns.”

“Do you remember where you were when you got shot?” Ethan asked. “We saw the wounds on your back.”

Shaking his head, Seth's wild blue eyes seemed to lose focus, as if he were looking at something inside his head. “Just somewhere. Some fight. There was always another fight. Always. That's war. Fighting and dying and shooting and bleeding and burning. Cannons exploding. The horses. The men. Both blown into pieces. I guess—I think a cannon blew a real deep hole in the ground and I fell and caught on fire. My shirt was on fire.”

Audra gave Ethan a nervous look. Seth seemed to be back in the middle of the war.

“I couldn't get out. I fell and I was burning. I was on fire and I couldn't get out of the hole.” Seth's voice rose. “It was like the devil was dragging me down into a fiery pit and I was on fire and I couldn't get out—”

“Stop!” Ethan's hand landed hard on Seth's upper arm.

Seth straightened and the terror and madness was suddenly gone. He looked down at Ethan's hand on his arm, then looked at Julia and smiled. “When are we going down into the cavern again? I really wanted to go today.”

Audra saw the anguish on Ethan's face at Seth's slim grasp on sanity. Audra couldn't stand it. Maggie was done eating, so Audra let her get down and slipped into the chair next to Seth and laid one hand on his shoulder, drawing his wild blue gaze to her.

“Seth, honey, we can talk about the cavern if you want to, but not now. Ethan is worried about you. We all are.”

“Why? I'm fine.” Seth smiled, but Audra saw a fine trembling in his body that was anything but fine.

Unable to resist the urge, Audra drew Seth into her arms and hugged him.

He froze. “What are you doing?” His head drew back, though he didn't push her away from him.

Audra met his eyes, then pulled him closer. “Just let me give you a hug. Did you know I have a little brother?”

“You talked about wanting to bring him out West. I remember. You've got a little sister, too.” Seth's hands hung at his sides. It was an awkward hug, but Audra held on.

Audra looked over Seth's shoulder at Ethan, who was watching them with one brow arched and his mouth twisted in what, for once, could
not
be considered a smile.

“Yes. I have a little brother named Isaac. I have a sister, Carolyn. When I married Wendell, I got Julia as a daughter, and my sister Carolyn became Julia's aunt, even though she is much younger than Julia. And when I married Ethan, I got two more brothers and Julia as a sister.” Audra pulled back so both hands were resting on Seth's broad shoulders.

Seth lifted one shoulder. “I like having a big sister. 'Cept you're a puny thing. Not much
big
about you.”

Audra smiled. “You're part of my family now.” Then her smiled faded. “And I'm worried about my little brother . . . you. I hate that you're having nightmares. I hate that you saw awful things in the war and were shot and imprisoned.”

“It wasn't so bad.”

“You were starved half to death and it took you over a year to get home, a year you say you can't remember. Then you went into that cavern instead of coming to the ranch, when you had to know how to get here. That sounds pretty bad to me.”

“I guess it does.” Seth was really listening, she could tell.

Seth needed a firm grasp on reality. Audra wasn't sure if listing all that was wrong with him was a good idea or not, so she prayed silently for guidance, then followed her instincts and just spoke honestly.

“We worry about you in that cavern, that it has some kind of . . . of unhealthy hold on you.”

“Audra . . .” Julia wanted Seth to help her. Audra knew it.

“Maybe facing the cavern is better than avoiding it. But face it clearheaded. You remember that Tracker Breach, the man who was down there with you, was feeding you laudanum.”

“He was?”

Audra sighed internally, wondering just how shaky a grip Seth really had on sanity. “Yes, so a lot of what happened, including the fact that you were in that cavern so long, can be blamed on the drugs he gave you. But now your head is clear and we ask you about the war and you drift into talk of the cavern and the accident you had when you were so young, falling into a pit, being on fire. Ethan's injuries last night only make it worse for you. We love you, Seth, and we want you to be strong and . . . and healthy.”

“You love me?” Seth's voice held a note of wonder.

Audra realized that it was true. She did love him, as a little brother and as a child of God. She loved Ethan too, but in a different, more wonderful way. Rafe, well, maybe, sort of, sure. He was scary, though. But he was a great husband for Julia. Perfect, in fact.

“Of course I do.” Unable to stop herself, she pulled Seth back close. Strange to hold a grown man. One she wasn't married to. She thought of the completely different feeling she got when Ethan held her in his arms.

When Audra eased back again, she squared her shoulders and looked between Ethan, Rafe, and Julia. “For Seth to heal, we need a more peaceful life. So we need to find out who is after whatever fortune Wendell supposedly stole, and then settle with that man who's after it.”

Audra looked hard at Julia. “How are we going to do that?”

“We've talked about it.” Julia leaned forward, folding her arms on the table. “We just can't remember Father carrying anything that could have amounted to a fortune. But he must have.”

“I think maybe, somehow, Wendell found that cavern and hid the money down there.” Audra looked at Seth. “Is that possible? How could he have found that place?”

“The cavern wasn't a secret really,” Ethan said with a shudder. “I'd never heard of that entrance in Rafe's mountain valley, but the hole we used to climb down could have been known in town. Your pa could have heard of it.”

“But does anyone really know the cavern except you Kincaid boys?”

“I know it quite well,” Julia reminded her. “Of course I don't know the depths of it. There is a lot more to explore.”

“I don't know it at all.” Ethan spoke too quickly.

“You hate it, but that's not the same as not knowing it,” Rafe said. “We hunted around down there for a few years before Seth's accident. I kept going down, and Seth explored it more than anyone. But I'll bet you know it better than Wendell could have in the short time he'd've had to explore.”

“Which means, Ethan, you know it well enough to help with this.” Audra frowned. “In fact, I'm the only one here who doesn't know the cavern well. I've never been in it except for that time Seth took Maggie down there.” She resisted the urge to slug him. It made her realize she was starting to think of him as a brother. “So, let's pretend like I'm Wendell. I'm going down to a cavern I've heard a rumor about. We figure he went down that hole where Julia climbed in, because except for Seth, as far as we know, the other exit had never been discovered.”

Audra was feeling very much in charge as everyone looked at her and, even more amazing, listened to her. “Tell me what I'd see if I climbed down there. Where would I go to hide my money? Are there crevices? Holes?”

“What about the hole Seth fell down?” Ethan asked. “It isn't very far in.”

“That's not really what I was thinking of.” Audra tried to imagine that awful, dark pit. It didn't really terrify her so much as worry her because of the danger it presented. But going down, feeling like horror lurked in the depths—that didn't seem to be an affliction she possessed. Something for which she fervently thanked God.

“I was thinking more of a small hole, a place a man could stick a bag of money in and leave it. Someplace easily found if a man went down there for the first time.”

There was silence as the four explorers mentally searched in that dark place.

Finally, Audra said, “Just start talking. Tell me about it. Tell me how it struck each of you when you first went down.”

The conversation that followed was lively. Seth's obsession with the cavern, Julia's passion for it, Rafe's hardy respect, Ethan's barely concealed loathing. They each described the cavern in a different way, but Audra got a mental picture.