Inconceivable! (41 page)

John nodded, his face blank. My husband hated everyone knowing that we were having trouble getting pregnant. Cilla and I talked him out of calling
Xpress
and demanding they retract the story with the “Barren-ness” headline. I didn’t show him the latest meme using my messy hair photo. Someone added the caption “Bad heir day” after
Xpress
’ story about our infertility broke. I feared he’d try to call Google and ask them to stop including it in search results.

Jos slapped John on the back and sniffed loudly. He wiped his nose with the back of his hand. “Alright. Let’s go kill somebody.” Jos headed back into the locker room.

I gave John a quick kiss on the lips. “If you do kill someone, make sure it’s Jack.”

Team Led by de Haven Crushes Opponents in Charity Rugby Match

By Alain Schwartz

April 25, 2015

Jos de Haven and his Blue team, which included Toulene’s Prince John, dealt a serious blow to the opposing side earlier today during a match at Pentuk.

De Haven’s rivals were the Red team, led by Daniel O’Shea. One of O’Shea’s teammates, Jacques Giteau, took a particularly hard tackle from de Haven and Prince John. Paramedics had to take Giteau off the field on a stretcher. Organizers of the match said Giteau was resting and was expected to make a full recovery. Proceeds from the match benefit a school and orphanage in Ethiopia. Final totals weren’t available yet, but organizers expected to raise €50,000.

he queen and I sat alone reading in the parlor after dinner. John and Leopold were playing darts in the game room on the other side of the palace. The queen had summoned us to Belvoir to celebrate John completing his Ph.D. With Henri, Adela, and Baby Juan on vacation in southern France, it was a quiet meal.

The queen closed her book. “Hatty. What’s all this business about you and John trying to have a baby?”

“We’ve been hoping to get pregnant for a while now. We may see a doctor when we’re in the U.S. in August for our friends’ wedding.”

“I trust you’ll have Lars take care of all the security and paperwork. The privacy laws are different in your country.”

“Yes, Your Majesty. And Toulene is my country now.” I set down my book.

“I hope for your sake this American doctor is very good.”

“For my sake?”

“Yes. If you’re unable to get pregnant, John will divorce you.” She didn’t blink as she stared at me.

“I don’t believe you.”

“Under our laws, the only obligation you have as his wife is to produce an heir. Failure to do so nullifies the marriage.”

“Which is it? He’ll divorce me or you’ll request our marriage be annulled?”
Get you story straight, Queenie.

“If he refuses to divorce you, I’ll order the marriage annulled. Either way, he’ll be free to find a new wife who can fulfill her obligations to our country.”

The injustice of her words choked me. I cleared my throat. “But it’s not my fault! The doctor said we don’t know why we can’t get pregnant!”

“Everyone knows you slept with that rugby player before you met John. I was willing to look the other way because you came to us with no other baggage. But now that you’re unable to accomplish one of the most basic biological functions, I’m withdrawing my support.”

“So, let me get this right. You don’t want a wife for John. You want a body to carry his baby.” I nearly spat the words at her.

“I want him to have both. John needs a partner who can help him give our country the one thing only he and Henri can provide: heirs.”

She stood, and so did I.

“I’ll be damned if you’re going to destroy my marriage. I told Leo to shove it, as you probably know, and now I’m respectfully passing along the same memo to you, too… Your Majesty.”

I walked out of the room and went into the service stairwell. I huffed, out of breath and horrified by the queen’s threat to annul my marriage.

I texted John:
I’ve decided. We will definitely do IVF in St. Louis.

Within seconds, he texted back:
If you’re sure, then I’m on board. I’ll call Lars in the morning.

resh sunshine penetrated the shutters we’d closed the night before, breathing life into the villa’s bedroom. Even though our bodies were still adjusting to Maui’s time zone, the sun called us to come and play. I wanted to tell the sun to shut up and go away so I could sleep.

I rolled over and inhaled sharply. “Oh, God. You scared me.”

John was lying there awake and staring at me. I yawned, careful to blow my morning breath out the side of my mouth, away from John.

Instead of speaking, John reached over, cradled the back of my head in his hand, and began kissing me. His movements took on a sense of urgency.

He continued to hold my head while his other hand navigated the sheet and comforter to find the bottom of the long shirt I wore. With one quick movement, he pulled it up. My hunger for him flared when I saw he’d removed his boxers while I’d slept.

Unlike many of our intimate encounters during the last year, the timing of this one didn’t match-up with my ovulation. We just wanted it. He took me with unusual force, and I responded purely from instinct. I didn’t think about whether the position of our bodies would make it easy for the sperm to reach an egg.

After a few brief moments of intensity, I expected this bliss to end as abruptly as it had started. But instead of hitting a high point, John stopped moving, grasped my hips, and turned me over.

This definitely isn’t sex for procreation
. I got on all fours. It was a position we hadn’t used in a very long time, but it felt so good, illicit even. That thought pushed me over the edge mere moments before John went over it, too. As his movement slowed, his breath sounded more ragged than normal and his hands continued to grasp my sides. I turned and looked up at his tear-streaked face.

I turned and melted into him. “What’s wrong?”

I stroked his hair as he hastily wiped at the tears. This was the first time I’d seen him cry.

“I think about it all the time, how to fix it. What’s it going to take to get you pregnant? But just this once, I wanted to have you. I wanted sex to be about me and you, not about the baby.” His face was damp from sweat and tears.

“Good work. I definitely wasn’t thinking about sex for procreation just now.” I winked and smiled, a lame attempt to lighten his mood.