Inseparable (23 page)

“I don’t feel very good.” I said, standing up. His hand shot out to steady me, and I pushed it away. “I’m okay, I just need to lie down.” I said faintly. The truth was, I needed space, but I couldn’t send him away.

“Do you want me to take you home?” He asked. I shook my head. “Do you want to go?” He asked, confused. I shook my head again. I needed to lie down.

Standing up, I walked down the hall to his room. Closing the door behind me, I climbed into his bed, half hoping if I went back to sleep I could wake up and all this would’ve just been a bad dream. Dane would be next to me, tickling my arm. I breathed in deeply, all I could smell was Dane. His scent was everywhere.

For hours I just lay on my back, staring at the ceiling. If I closed my eyes, would Abby come? Would she know how much I needed her? And would she tell me what to do, or would I figure that out on my own?

Somewhere between crying over Abby, and crying over Dane, I realized something. How selfish I was. All through Abby’s treatments, I’d tried to stay strong for her, but inside I was a wreck wondering how I was going to cope after she had gone. Everything that happened I broke it down by how it was going to affect me. And I was doing it again, now. So Dane had cancer.

So what? It was a year ago, and he was healthy now. Who knew what was going to happen, or what was going to take us in the end. He could be killed in an accident next week for all I knew, or die from old age when he’s ninety-five, with e by his side.

I was so focused on that twenty percent chance of the cancer returning, because it had taken so much from me already. It had taken my best friend. My sister. A part of me. Dane saw cancer as something he had beaten, he had faced it and won. If he could see that in a positive light, I owed it to him to do the same. I owed it to myself.

Chapter Twenty-Six

Dane was curled up on the sofa, asleep when I walked in. For a moment, I watched him, the way his hand twitched, and his chest moved to the rhythm of his breathing. Sitting down in front of him, I placed my hand inside of his. He instinctively squeezed it as he opened his eyes. I watched as a range of emotions moved through his eyes. Surprise, shock, relief.

Reaching out my hand, I brushed his hair from his eyes, stunning blue eyes that never left my own.

“I love you.” I whispered, my lips encasing his. He kissed me deeply, shivers ran throughout my body. “If I get you for a year, or ten, of fifty, I don’t care. I love you.” I repeated, this time louder, and with conviction. Dane sat up, pulling me onto his lap.

“I love you too, Lil. I love you so god dammed much.” He cradled me in his arms, kissing me over and over again. It felt right. Around him, I felt complete again. How could I fight something that made me feel whole again?

“How did it start? What happened?” I asked softly, joining him on the sofa. He put his arm around my shoulders.

“I was a state level boxer, and I woke up with some pretty serious back pain. At first I thought it was from a hit, but when it hadn’t gone a couple of weeks later, I went to the doctor. Blood tests came back with abnormal kidney function, so he wanted to do an ultrasound.” Dane played with my fingers as he spoke. “When they told me it was cancer, I didn’t know what to do. My first thought was for mom and dad. After what happened with Steffy, how could I tell them they might lose me too?”

“What did the doctors say? Did they give you a prognosis?” I asked.

“They told me that the rates for a full recovery were high if they removed the kidney and my lymph nodes. It would mean no competitive sport ever again, but in return it might save my life. There was no question for me. I booked in the surgery that week.” Dane shrugged. Going through Abby’s diagnosis with her, I couldn’t imagine how hard it must’ve been for Dane going through that alone.

“When did you tell your parents?” I asked softly.

“After I was discharged from the hospital, with the surgeon confident they got all the cancer.” He put his head back, his hand resting on his forehead as his eyes met mine. “It was hard, being alone through all those ‘what ifs’, but I just couldn’t tell my parents until I knew what I was dealing with.”

“And your friends? College?” I asked, still not sure why he had kept it such a secret.

“I just found I didn’t have much in common with my friends after I couldn’t box anymore. I didn’t tell anyone because I didn’t want everyone thinking they had to feel sorry for me.” He tried to mask the hurt he still felt about his apparent friends abandoning him.

“I’m sorry I didn’t know you earlier.” I mumbled, curling up in his lap. “I would have looked after you.”

“You do, sexy.” He said softly, stroking my hair. “You’re the best thing ever to happen to me.” I turned onto my back, smiling up at the face staring down at me from above. I wanted to lie like this forever, in his arms. In all this uncertainty, we had managed to find each other, and neither of us was about to let go.

Dane went out for some dinner while I had a shower, putting on one of his shirts after I had dried myself. The shirt hung down mid-thigh, my blonde hair hanging loosely around my shoulders. Meeting him at the door when I heard his car pull up, he breathed in sharply when he saw me standing there, half naked.

“Hey.” Dane smiled, not taking his eyes off me. He moved forward, wrapping his arms around my waist, his hand creeping underneath the shirt. His lips sought mine for a long, intense, kiss that I was more than happy to return. “I missed you.” He mumbled, nibbling on my ear. Gripping his face, I led his lips back to mine and kissed him passionately.

“Do I get to come in?” He chuckled, lifting me up and spinning me around so I was now outside. “That’s better.” He said as I laughed. I hoped none of his neighbors were watching this!

He tugged at the buttons of the shirt. Swatting his hand away, I reached down to retrieve the takeout bag in his hand.

“Mmm, Chinese.” I smiled, looking inside. “We should eat before it goes cold.”

“I was thinking we might do something else first.” Dane replied, fingering the belt loops on my jeans, pulling my body against his. I didn’t need to ask him what he was thinking.

“I guess we can reheat this…” I agreed, letting him lead me inside..

“My whole family loves you, you know.” He smiled. I laughed.

“Really? That’s what you want to talk about right now?” I giggled, as his mouth trailed kisses down my neck, the top button popping open.

“What I want to talk about is how sexy you are.” He mumbled, undoing another button. He undid his pants, kicking them off, and lifted his shirt over his head. I breathed in at the sight of his bare chest, just how much I’d missed him the last week really beginning to hit me. I knelt down in front of him, kissing each freckle, every scar, every spot I could find.

I looked up at him as I gently eased down his underpants, his erection rising like a coiled spring.

“Someone’s excited.” I chuckled, curling my tongue around the tip of his length. He gasped, his hands curving around my neck, driving his length deeper inside my mouth. If it were possible, he got even harder, groaning as I worked his shaft.

“Stand up.” He ordered. I stood, he eased the shirt off my shoulders, ripping apart the remaining buttons as he balanced me on the arm of the sofa. “Curl your legs around me.” He panted. I knotted my legs around his waist, letting out a squeal as he thrust himself inside of me.

“Wow, Lil, you feel so damn good.” He panted, sweat forming over his brow. Letting my arms stretch back behind me onto the cushions, I groaned at the feel of him inside me. He was so damn hard. “God Lil, keeping stretching like that.” He moaned, his thrusts becoming faster, and more urgent. “I’m gonna come.” He cried. “Oh, hell Lil!” His body jerked back and forth as he came. He put his hands either side of me on the arm, and eased himself out from inside me.

“Shit, that was amazing.” He said, shaking his head. He reached for my hand, pulling me to my feet. “You, are amazing, Lily.”

The rest of the evening consisted of Chinese, sex, cuddling, more sex, watching TV in bed, and talking, which was followed by more sex. We had definitely made up for lost time. We were lying naked in bed, he was gently tickling my back, and I was enjoying it.

“Mm mm.” I moaned softly, on the verge of falling asleep. I loved being naked in bed with him. The feel of my skin directly against his under the soft cotton sheets was one of the best feelings in the world.

“You’re so beautiful.” He whispered, his fingers gently stroking my hair.

“I love you, Dane.” I mumbled, turning over to cuddle him.

“Love you too, Lil. No matter what.”

I breathed out deeply as my eyes flew open. The morning light momentarily blinded me, making me squint until my eyes adjusted. Rolling over, I saw Dane was awake, watching me. He smiled.

“Morning.”

“Morning.” I repeated, wondering how long he had been watching me sleep. I snuggled under his arm, breathing in his scent.

“How did you sleep?” I asked him, as he kissed my forehead.

“Good. You?”

I thought for a moment. “Well.” I said finally. “I slept well.”

Reaching for Dane’s hand, I wrapped it around my own. The feeling of waking up with him felt so right, I couldn’t imagine not having him in my life. He worked his fingers around mine until they were in position for a thumb war.

“What are you doing?” I laughed, the competitive side of me bucking to attention.

“What, are you scared or something?” He said, raising his eyebrows at me, his blue eyes taunting me.

Scared? We would see who the scared one was!

“You’re going down, Hansen.” I said, sitting up on my elbow to get myself in a better position. He laughed as I screamed go, our fingers once again dancing around, waiting for the perfect moment to strike. My body curled around, trying to bend his elbow under me.

“Hey!” He cried, laughing. “Not fair, you’re cheating!” He went for the move and I pounced, my thumb slamming down on top of his.

“Yes!” I cried, laughing. “Champion.”

He narrowed his eyes at me, and suddenly his fingers were everywhere, tickling me. I screamed, tears streaming from my eyes as I tried to get away from him. He was so strong though, and so determined to tickle me until I passed out.

“Punishment for cheating.” He said, laughing as I finally broke free, collapsing in a heap, on the floor, totally out of breath.

“That was cruel!” I gasped, trying my best to glare at him, my twitching lips giving away my amusement. I took his outstretched hand, as he yanked me back onto the bed, covering me with kisses as I laughed. Rolling over, I smiled at him, watching him watch me, thinking about how much I loved this guy.

Epilogue

Dane leaned over and kissed my cheek before knocking on the door.

“You ready?” He whispered in my ear. I nodded and smiled as Laurel opened the door.

“About time! We thought we were going to have to start without you.” She joked, ushering us inside. “Now, give me another look at that lovely ring.” She smiled reaching for my hand. The single half carat princess cut diamond sparkled in the light. “Stunning.” She sighed, shaking her head. “Go into the living room. Everyone is already here.” I grinned, knowing everyone meant my family, Dane’s family, our friends, everyone who was important to us was here to celebrate our engagement.

So much has happened in the fourteen months since Steffy was found. Dane was still cancer free, his last two check-ups returning nothing out of the ordinary, and Steffy was nearly a completely different person.

I glanced at the mature young woman sitting in an armchair, dressed in a beautiful knee length plum shift dress, and I struggled to picture her as the same person she was a year ago. Her blue eyes lit up as she spotted us, her smile enough to bring tears to my eyes. She stood and walked over to us.

“Lil, you look beautiful.” She smiled, hugging me. “You don’t look too bad either, Dane.” She joked. He laughed, and kissed his sister on the cheek.

“How are you, Steff? You look really good.” I smiled, holding her hand out to get a better look at her. She blushed at my attention.

“I’m good, Lil.” She smiled. “Congratulations to both of you, too.” She added.

“Thanks.” I smiled, glancing at Dane. He nodded. “I wanted to ask you something. If it’s something you don’t feel up to, we understand, but I’d love for you to be my maid of honor.”

Steffy’s eyes widened. “Really? Oh my gosh, I would love that!” She cried, almost knocking me over with another hug. “Thank you!”

“Nothing would make us happier than having you up there beside me on our wedding day.” I laughed, regaining my balance.

“Have you guys set a date yet?” She asked excitedly.

“The fourth of November this year.” Dane replied, squeezing my waist. “And I can’t wait.” He murmured, kissing my lips.

“Well I’m so excited for you both. I’m going to tell mom.” She smiled at us, before disappearing into the small crowd.

“See seems really good.” I whispered to Dane. He nodded.

“Mom said she’s still having nightmares, and panic attacks, but she’s getting there slowly.” Dane shrugged. “She’s been through a lot, and it’s a slow process, you know?” I nodded. I admired Steffy and her ability to work through everything.

“Lil!”

I looked up and saw Kella and Fraser heading toward us, her long high waist dress showing off her growing baby bump beautifully. She and Fraser had married four months ago, in a very intimate wedding reception in Spain. I had the honor of being her bridesmaid, and Dane was Fraser’s best man, the two of them becoming very close friends in the months following Steffy’s rescue.

“Kella, Hey.” I smiled, reaching out to touch her stomach. Kella rolled her eyes, which made me laugh. I could see how happy she was. “You look beautiful. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this happy, Kel.” I said sincerely. She grinned, rubbing her stomach.

“He keeps kicking me.” She giggled, raising an eyebrow. I gasped.

“He? You’re having a boy!” I cried, hugging her. She laughed.

“We found out yesterday. Tyler Derek Garrison the fourth.” She said, her dark eyes glowing with pride. Fraser gently touched her stomach, his head cocked to the side.