Into Death's Arms (35 page)

  
You are worth a week Macyn I can wait.
He assured me. His presence left me.

    
I felt the tears threaten to overwhelm me again. I wasn’t sure whether
I was more upset he’d agreed or that my entire world had ceased to be what it had once been. My comfortable assuredness was gone. I was no longer sure who was the monster and who was the hero.

    Laith came into the room very quietly. He sat down in the chair my father had found himself sitting many nights when I was a girl. He waited patiently for me to start the conversation.

    “I let Tameron bite me,
” I whimpered.
I was so ashamed of myself. Did I really have so little
self-control
?

     “Yeah,” he said. That was it no condemnation, no accusation, just a statement. He waited for me
to say something more.

      “Yeah,” I answered.

       He shifted slightly in the chair. “You like
it,
” he asked
softly again there was no opinion in his tone just concern
.

       I shrugged, “Yeah.”

       “I don’t trust
Vamp
ires
.” He said, finally something like an opinion.

       I laughed it was a loud bark in the otherwise very quiet room. “Me neither.” I answered. I rolled toward him. “Now I’m all confused and don’t know what the hell I’m doing.”

       He nodded knowingly.

       “What was the hardest decision you ever had to make?” I asked needing someone something I could identify with.

      He looked at the floor. “When Mom died I thought Caden would give you up to the other Ao. I knew the only reason he’d agreed to raise you here in the first place was because Mom had wanted it.
As
I told yo
u before I was here that night.” He ran his fingers through
over his jaw
something I had noticed he did when upset.
“
He was
distraught;
he locked you in the garage. You were so little at the time. I could have taken you.
” His black eyes bore into mine as if to say seriously I could have. “
No one would have ever known. I could have ensured you were raised the way Iris wanted you to be. I could have
rai
sed you the way I wanted to,
” He shrugged.

   
“
But while watching Caden I realized that to do that, to take you when he had just lost Mom would
have completely destroyed him.” Laith shook his head. His eyes still filled with the kind of loss I often saw in my father’s eyes. My mother had been one hell of a
woman;
I regretted
missing
that.

    
“
I thought while Mom might be gone those things s
he loved most were still here y
ou,
Caden, and me
. I stayed until right before dawn. In the
end,
I chose to leave. I am so thankful it turned out almost as I hoped.
” He laughed a little bitterly.

        Caden always let you think for yourself, he protected you better than anyone else include me could have. He raised you to be an amazing woman
,” h
e paused giving me time to digest that, I wasn’t so sure he was right I didn’t feel amazing I felt raw and broken, “
and then he did the most amazing thing he stepped back and let you
be that person
.
He left town and left you alone here with Dayton fucking Tameron on the loose.
I’m not sure I would have been so okay with letting my little girl go out and kill the monsters, and make no mistake AoD those you have killed have been monsters.
” Once
again,
those black eyes the kind of eyes I’d had nightmares about for years bore into me,
“Those
who prey on the helpless, whether they be human,
Shadow-born
, or Ao are monsters.
” He shrugged
like
the subject was a little to
o
heavy for him and he had to get some of the weight off
, “I am proud to call you my sister. In the end I know you will make the right decision.” He stood, put his hand on my shoulder and smiled.  I smiled back. I wasn’t sure about anything anymore, well that wasn’t entirely true. I was sure I loved my brother and he loved me, and if I could love one
Shadow-born
, surely I could love another.  If he could love me than another
could love as well, right?
I picked up my phone and dialed Laurna’s number.

    She picked up on the
third ring. “I want to meet him,
” I said softly.
I waited for her to answer I would not hold it against her if she told me no. She had a right to feel protective. I knew for a fact I wasn’t going to be introducing Dayton or Laith to any other Ao anytime soon.

    She was hesitant. That showed
just
how smart Laurna really was. “Mace are you sure? I mean you can’t kill my boyfriend it would seriously damage our relationship.” Her voice was soft
but she meant what she said if I killed her
boyfriend,
we wouldn’t be friends anymore
.

    “Yeah, and I promise I’ll be good. I just want to know tha
t you’re in good hands you know,
” I admitted
feeling a little queasy
.
I prayed she didn’t make me explain myself I wasn’t feeling up to the whole I might love a
Vamp
ire
so I guess it’s okay that you love a
Vamp
ire
thing it was still just too weird for me.

      Her voice couldn’t have carried more joy. “I am Macy, I really am. He’s everything I ever wanted and every
thing I didn’t know to look for,” she confided
.
Wow! That was certainly a ringing endorsement. But
,
I jus
t couldn’t
help but notice she’d just described how I was starting to think about one fabulously sexy black haired
Vamp
myself.

     “Call me back and let me know when and where okay?” I asked unsure of how to deal with her absolute surety.

      “Okay,
” She hung up.

     That night I sat in one of those little hibachi restaurants you know where the cook right on the table. Laurna
sat next to me and Donovan sat, looking somewhat like a small hill, across from me. We were the only three at the table. Laurna beamed at both of us.

     I studied the menu. Laurna chattered happily. Donovan watched me like a hawk. Every so often looking over at Laurna, it was those moments when his gaze slid to her like his eyes couldn’t bear to be bereft of the sight of her any longer that convinced me she really was going to be okay. Because when his eyes lit upon her, I could see his entire soul in his eyes. Those lime green orbs would light up like t
he sun reflected off the snow.
Bright almost blinding in its intensity.

     The man fixing our food barely spoke English Laurna had arranged it that way on purpose. “So
do
Vamp
ires marry or what?”
I asked unsure if I was asking for Laurna or myself.

   He raised one big brown eyebrow.
“We mate like the Ao although we do tend to marry as well. The Ao
rarely marry even though they try to pret
end they are more human than we,” h
e answered. His voice was low, dark,
and scary
as hell I hadn’t imagined that the first night we met.

     “No, I suppose we don’t.” I took a sip of my green tea, “but it still
isn’t the same thing. So spill,
” I waved a hand at him.

     Laurna was frowning at me. “We…” he paused searching for the right words. “Usually we wait for the right person. Our soul mate, sometimes not.” He ran his finger along the edge of his water glass. “We know when it is the right person, not always right away, but there is a strong physical attraction even in the beginning. As if that person were the North Star and you,
the
Vamp
ires
that is, were metal clippings.” He sighed, “It’s like this slow draw that pulls you toward them. Until you become magnetized
,
you know
,
and
you
can’t seem to do anything but drift north.” He looked at Laurna again and I could totally see how she was indeed his North Star.

     “What happens if you lose your mate?” I asked softly, judging by the look in his eyes the moment before it couldn’t be good but I wanted to know. If I rejected
Tameron,
what was I condemning him to?

     I saw the big
Vamp
ires
Adam’s apple
Mike
. “Like the metal clipping cut them off from the source of magnetization and they slowly die becoming once again inanimate things.
I’ve never known a
Vamp
ire
to survive the loss of his mate,” h
e answered gravely.
Great, just fucking great, I was stuck with Tameron or he’d die.
I had no doubt in my mind I was the man’s mate I sometime, I mean all the times, yeah, all the time doubted he was my mate but not vice versa.

      “What wi
ll happen when Laurna grows old,
” I asked. I know curiosity killed the cat, but what’s the point of having nine lives if you can’t fudge one now and again.

     His eyes hit her again and the pain there was so virulent that I actually felt it for a mo
ment. “I won’t survive her long,” h
e shook his head.

      She frowned, “Don’t say that.” She held out her plate and the hibachi chef piled veggies onto it.

      He smiled gently down at her. “There would be no point to existence without you my pet.” He handed her the soy sauce before she had a chance to ask for it. She rolled her eyes.

      I bit my lip unsure of how to ask the next question. I took a bite of steak and chewed while I thought. “Would it be the same if…if,” I know I blushed, “What if she had never acknowledged your claim on her? I mean if she fought tooth and nail to not be your mate?” I finally got out in a big rush of breath.

     One of those dark eyebrows rose. “It would make very little
difference;
a mate is a mate, just like with the Ao.” His tone was a little smug. I decided to ignore it.

     Laurna took his hand, “That’s funny, ho
w could I resist a man like Ash,
” he gazed adoringly at their joined hands.
How could you not? I thought he still reminded me of a serial killer, cold, hard, sterile, except for those brief moments when he laid eyes on his mate, Laurna.

      “I don’t believe we have been talking abo
ut you and I at all have we AoD,
” he asked. I could have lied but what was the point?

       I shook my head
,
“
no…
not really.”

       “
Oh…
Macy,” Laurna exclaimed
breathlessly
. She looked so pleased.
I wish I felt half a
s
pleased as she felt. I was still confused but I couldn’t just let Dayton fade away could I? Besides I was an Ao I was pretty sure he was my mate would I survive his death. My father had survived for me but I didn’t have anything like a child to hold onto. Suddenly the image of mini Dayton’s running around flashed in my mind. I had to admit I liked that.

       Donovan who
had before then just been picking at his food suddenly dug in smiling a smile so wide I didn’t know how anybody missed seeing his fangs.
Damn mind readers!

       “Can we keep
this conversation to ourselves,
” I asked
self-consciously
. They both nodded
in agreement
.

   
It had been two days since the last time I’d seen Dayton and I was feeling antsy. I craved his presence almost like an addict craves his drugs. I shrugged it
off;
this was normal classic signs of an Ao bonding. I told my overwrought brain to leave me be.

   
It didn’t do much good.

  
I rode up to his apartment in that tiny elevator. I hate elevator music. They never play what you want to hear. I tapped my foot impatiently. This time I really had dressed to impress. I wore a little red strapless dress, with an empire waist. It made my breasts look bigger, most importantly though I pinned all my hair on top of my head, leaving my neck and shoulders completely bare. Underneath I wore my prettiest white lingerie. I was nervous. I laughed at myself. I hunted down the monsters and felt nothing more intrusive than anticipation. I wanted to impress this
Vamp
ire
so badly though that I felt nervous.