Into the Deep (18 page)

Chapter Thirty-Two

After we leave Nerio’s family, I mull over everything I learned. Calandra is a threat Stavros must deal with now, before she grows any stronger. She’s here, in our ocean, and that’s terrifying. My biggest question is how much do I tell him? Can I pass along this information without adding that there may be hope?

The highs of the last few days are starting to resemble a dream. It’s been a crazy roller-coaster of emotions and becoming caught up in the fun stuff isn’t an option anymore. Some very stark realities were put to light at Nerio’s. I can’t be ignorant about what might happen to humans, as the other mer are. They are also my people and deserve someone campaigning for their survival, though they won’t realize it. My worry over Mom is doubled. She’s alone and vulnerable. Can I keep her safe too?

Reminiscing about my other form reminds me of what Nerio said when we met.

“Do you not respect humans at all?”

His pace slows. A wary expression crawls over his face and I sense he’s searching for a diplomatic answer. Not good. My heart free falls into my stomach.

“No. In a lot of ways, I despise them.”

His answer leaves me empty. “You do realize we’re not all the same, don’t you? I mean, I’m human.”

An ironic sneer flashes at me. “You may have grown up as one of them, but this is your true form. This is who you are and who you’re meant to be. I see it in how you move, the joy when you swim with Kona.”

I’m conflicted. No matter how much I love being a mermaid and consider it my future, I’m still rooted to land by family and my childhood.

“Nerio, I can’t forget that part of myself,” I croak, wishing my voice was stronger.

He stops and takes my hands in his, squeezing the fingers. “You’re better than them. Why else are you comfortable in this form? Mer blood is dominant because we’re descended from gods. I can’t fathom the possibility you’re considering not accepting this gift and returning to that life.”

Chills snake up my neck. It’s the kind of elitist crap I’d expect from Calandra. His views are exact copies of the ones Magdalena and Eustacia expressed at dinner. It ticks me off. My chest tightens with disappointment, glimpsing disgust in the same eyes that set me on fire. But I’m not giving up on him yet.

“You’re condemning an entire species for the crimes of a few. Humans are guilty of the worst crimes imaginable, but they’re also capable of great love and compassion.”

“Do you have any idea why our numbers are so low?” He tosses back. “We’re the same as any other creature in the ocean. Our habitat is being poisoned and neglected. Soon we’ll be the myth your kind believes we are.”

I throw my hands up in the air. “It doesn’t have to be so extreme. I’ll still be me. I grew up on land, it’ll always be part of my history. What we’ve done to the oceans is horrible, I will never deny that, but my mother is human and I can’t turn on her.”

“Give it time.” He smirks. “I guarantee the longer you stay here, the more you’ll see the truth about them and their carelessness.”

A scream begs to be released, but I shut it down. He’s so stubborn!

“There’s hope. Scientists recognize the damage we’ve done and they’re researching ways to make it safer for the oceans. I’ve been learning about it in class. We’re not ignorant to the mistakes of the past. There can be change. I have faith.”

His disbelief is evident. “Mer have listened to the lie about hope for centuries. It’s never going to happen. I can show you the destruction, what I’m talking about.”

I have no choice but to follow him, hot tears and hurt clawing at my throat. We travel in silence for half an hour until the water clears and we’re back in a tropical environment.

“Remember when we went out and I took you to the reef?” I nod. “Then Stavros showed you the ones in the palace, correct?”

“Yes, they’re amazing. I don’t get where you’re going with this.”

“Keep that picture in your mind.”

A couple minutes later, the scenery changes. The water is saturated with a coppery taste, mixed with a trace of rot, and we’re in an area that should be teeming with life, but there isn’t a single creature. A large white object looms into view, not three feet from the surface. Confused, I squint, struggling to figure out what it is.

Then, suddenly, I recognize it.

A coral reef. It’s about ten feet high and stretching to four times that distance wide. And it’s stark white, bleached of all color. Nothing lives here—no fish, no crabs, not even any coral. The other reefs were vibrant in color and vitality. This resembles a relic from the moon. It’s a haunting sight.

Nerio places his palm on it, something he could not do otherwise because the polyps sting and burn our thick skin.

“This is a small example of the destruction they cause.”

I snap out of my horror. “You’re blaming this on us? I mean, humans? How do you know this isn’t Calandra’s doing?”

“Because you don’t recognize them for what they really are!” He raises his voice passionately. “They pollute our waters and dump their trash here. This is not caused by anything in our world. It’s comparable to someone dropping a nuclear bomb on one of their cities. Thousands and thousands of lives lost. You have learned more than anyone that these creatures feel.”

“I’m not arguing they don’t,” I sputter. “What happened here is horrible. If you could spend some time with me, in my world, you might change your attitude.”

“I will never do that.” He bites out through a clenched jaw. “I grew up out here, in what many consider the wild. It’s not the posh life those in the palace live. Here I saw the struggle, the overfishing, the murder done to whales simply for their blubber. I’ve seen the barrels at the bottom of the ocean leaking poisons—poisons so terrible they can’t put them on land. That’s why I hate them.”

“You realize who you sound like?” He’s making me so mad I want to hurt him back. “Calandra.”

His head jerks as if I slapped him. I continue, “You hate humans, fine. Just remember that’s who I am. No matter what I choose or how strongly you view me as special, I’ll always be two people. I had a great childhood. Growing up I was happy and loved and safe. Don’t judge me for the actions of greedy humans who have no regard for anyone’s lives but their own. If you hate them, you hate me.”

My chest heaves and a tremble moves up my arms. It’s impossible to judge if what I said makes a difference. His face is as unyielding as stone.

When he speaks, his tone is low. “I won’t argue about how you were raised. You turned into an amazing creature and I admit plenty of that does have to do with your time on land. And of course there are innocents in your race. I’m not a monster who wants to harm women and children. I’ve just lost all faith that they will ever change. I’ve witnessed too much. I’m starting to care deeply for you and it’s holding me back. I keep waiting for the heartless side to pop out.”

“I don’t know if I should be pissed that you hold other people’s crimes against me or flattered you admitted you have feelings for me.” His opinions of humans hurt, cutting to the bone and leaving me raw. Nerio’s a brave, intelligent merman, and if I only have the opportunity, I can show him differently.

His shoulders slump. “I meant it to be both. I don’t see me ever changing my mind on this. It doesn’t mean I’m not the same person I was an hour ago. My beliefs are part of who I am, what I’ve experienced.”

Each word he utters confuses me more. Truth be told, I understand why he feels the way he does. It’s not right, but I get it. I have to come to terms with whether or not I can view him in the same light. His free and unique spirit is part of the attraction.

But I have to know. “Do you think Calandra should be stopped?”

“Absolutely,” he confirms without hesitation. “No one should use their power for evil. Imagine the good her abilities could do instead. I’m loyal to my king and kingdom. I’ll do what they demand of me.”

Funny, he didn’t really mention the fate of those on land in his answer. I decide to leave it alone even as my heart is yanked in two directions. His vow to fight for Stavros is reassuring. That’s the Nerio I care for, not the cold, unforgiving version. Maybe when it’s over and done with, I can take him to the surface and show him humans aren’t what he stubbornly believes, how they can triumph over adversity. My leg is a great example. It was the result of progress and tenacity.

I float over and look him directly in the eye. “In this situation, we should agree to disagree for now. I care for you too. If I can try and look past your harsh views, maybe you can as well. I’m a product of my environment, same as you. Neither of us would be who we are without it. I hope you learn to care for me because of that and not in spite of it. Someday I might attempt change your way of thinking.”

Finally, he grins. “You can try, but I can’t promise.”

We stay in that position for a few minutes, so close and not quite touching. It’s weird to have such conflicting emotions for someone. If I fall in love, it should be with someone who accepts me, all versions of me. But he’s been a big part of the person I’ve grown into. His faith in me strengthens my courage and because of that, I view myself in a different way.

He ends the silence. “We better go.”

Chapter Thirty-Three

After our argument an awkward silence descends as we continue. I wish my mom or Charlotte were here to help work through my swirling emotions. In this moment I’m not a mermaid. I’m a lovesick teen desperate for ice cream and her girls.

But a battle is on the horizon, that is clear, and I can’t be worrying about boy problems, no matter how complicated they are. He’s a friend, an ally, and I can’t lose that. We will figure the rest out after.

Then an idea occurs to me.

“Nerio, wait.” He turns expectantly. “Teach me to fight.”

To his credit, he doesn’t laugh or balk. When the battle does start, it’s important that I can defend myself and the world I care for. I can’t rely solely on this mysterious power I have. Doubt shines from his eyes though.

“I’m serious. You won’t have to worry about me being a sucky student. I’m a quick learner, especially down here. I need all the advantage I can get.”

His mouth twitches and I know I have him.

“Thankfully, you’re already fast,” he says. “That will be an asset to you in a skirmish. It isn’t solely based on brute strength. You have to learn your opponent and use this.” He points to his head.

“Yes, oh wise teacher.”

“I’m probably going to regret this,” he mutters. “Stay here.”

He zips down to the floor of the gentle rise we’re following and returns with a couple sticks about two feet long. At least I assume they’re sticks, they could have been bones considering the amount of corrosion and buildup on them.

“Our agility is both a strength and a weakness. Study how mer move, even as they linger around the palace. It’ll help you.” He passes me one of the makeshift weapons. “Go ahead and move it through the water. It will be hard because of the resistance.”

No joke there. Maneuvering the stick requires a lot of effort. It drags heavily and is covered in muck. My arms are fairly strong on land, but this is different.

“It’s a heck of a lot tougher than I thought it would be.”

“Our actual swords are smaller and streamlined. They cut through the water better. At least it’ll build up your strength. Hold it this way.”

He shows me how gripping it closer to the middle cuts down on the drag. I position my left hand over the right and spread them as far apart as his are. Sure enough, it’s easier to handle.

“Okay, good. I’ll start slowly. Most people are familiar with the basic moves, even if they’ve never fought. It’s basic instinct. If I swing at you, show me how you’d counter it. It should be a natural reaction.”

The stick comes at me about shoulder height and I raise mine to meet it. The impact is soft, but it vibrates down my arms.

“Perfect. Let’s do that a few times. I’ll switch it up a bit.”

His next swing is near my waist. It’s awkward to block, but I manage. We practice for a while, in super slow motion, and then he picks up the pace. Out of nowhere, he spins and takes a shot at my head. He stops the stick about an inch from my temple. I let out a startled gasp.

“Once you get the hang of how the weapon moves, you can do different blocks. Try some offense.”

To show him I at least have a sliver of potential, I pour all my force into the attack. Not that it does any good. My swing at his gut is blocked. The next time, I aim higher and he grabs my stick. With lightening speed, he pulls me toward him and my body bumps against his. We’re pressed close, shoulder to tail. My heart stutters an uneven beat and electricity shoots down my spine, making me twitch against him. I’m aware of every single inch of him.

His lips curl into a smile. “If you’re not careful, you’ll end up in a dangerous position.”

He holds my arms above us, his thumb rubbing the inside of my wrist. Nerves and desire steal my words, holding them as tight as he holds me. When he releases me, I am certain the attraction has not faded regardless of our argument and his views of my land-loving other half.

“Let’s do it again,” he says, breaking the contact. “Remember how mad I made you earlier. Use it.”

I gather my wits and struggle to do as he instructs. I focus on how I felt when he said he’s waiting for me to show my heartless side. I shriek and advance. It works. At least, it works better than it did before. Stronger momentum goes into my swings and I hold onto the emotion.

We spar, or at least attempt to spar, until he calls it good for the day. My limbs are loose, achy, but I managed a total of two hits.

Nerio lets me keep my stick, which I notice actually is a large bone.

“Practice while you’re alone. Face the opponent in your mind and work on the moves. You caught on quick. Soon your body will pick it up and it’ll be second nature.”

“Thanks, I may not do much damage, but I can try.”

“If you’re involved in any surprise attacks, you’ll give them more than they expect.” His gaze lingers on my lips and heat spreads through me. “Let’s go.”

Once again, we set out for home. That’s when I remember the dinner Galina arranged with Xander later and stifle a groan. I should be honest with Nerio and warn him about it. I can’t risk him getting the wrong idea.

As I open my mouth to speak, the palace looms into view. And so does an armed Alexios, who swims up to us. He lowers his sword but not the heavy scowl.

“Thank heavens you’re safe. Stavros is going crazy.” The words are clipped, tense.

“What happened?” Nerio asks.

“Two mermen were found dead not far from here. They were out hunting. All signs point to a shark attack. Their bodies were left where they would’ve obviously been found, stuffed into a tiny crevice.”

Ice runs through my veins and I shudder. “Sharks normally don’t leave their dinner behind, do they?”

“We assume they were left behind as a message,” Alexios replies grimly.

Nerio concentrates on a distant point. “Whoever did it wants us to know we’re not safe in our own waters.”

Neither of them has to say who we’re thinking of…Calandra. This is a bold and horrible move. My heart aches for the poor mer who were murdered merely to make a statement.

“It’s like the others,” Alexios speaks low into Nerio’s ear while I am distracted, but the words drift over.

“What do you mean,
like the others
?”

Alexios expression is glum. “You were not meant to hear that, princess. This is the tenth incident in the past three weeks. All were apparent shark attacks and left in a location they’d be found. The king’s frustrated because no one is talking. Every ambassador claims it wasn’t their kingdom, obviously.”

I peek at Nerio and he nods slightly. We need to be honest about what we learned.

It’s Nerio who speaks. “Today we visited with my family, up by the kelp farms. My father told us he’s seen a lot of activity. More of the settlers are tracking strange mer passing through, including ones from the Southern Ocean accompanied by sharks. And others farther out are either disappearing or being murdered in their homes.”

The implication of what he’s implying bobs between us, an ugly piece of broken debris. Alexios pales. “They are certain of this?”

“Yes, many of them are scared.” I add.

“Don’t speak of this to anyone yet.”

Without another word he leaves us. We follow, each of us preoccupied. Once we are inside the walls, Nerio wishes me goodnight distractedly and I watch him disappear around a corner.