Into the Still Blue (5 page)

Aria’s eyebrows drew together. “
You
need to get organized? So
you’re
going this time?”

Her temper cooled by the second. She thought he was leaving her. That he was getting back at her for leaving him by going without her tomorrow.

“I want us both to go,” he rushed to clarify. “I know you’re hurt, but if you feel well enough, I need you on this mission. You’re as much Dweller as you are Outsider—we’ll be facing both—and you’ve dealt with Hess and Sable.”

There were other reasons. She was clever and tenacious. A strong Aud. Most importantly, he didn’t want to say goodbye to her in the morning. But he didn’t say any of those things. He couldn’t bring himself to open his heart only to have her choose not to be with him once again.

“I’ll go on the mission,” Aria said. “I already planned to. And you’re right. I am hurt. But I’m not afraid to admit it.”

Then she was gone, taking all the air and light in the cavern with her.

5

A
ria returned to the Dweller cavern.

Work would help her sort through her anger and confusion. It would help her forget the sound of Perry and Roar shouting at each other. Maybe, if she busied herself enough, she’d even get the words
You vanished on me, Aria
out of her head.

Molly moved amid the sickly bundles that stretched back into the darkness. Some of the Dwellers seemed to be stirring now, and a few of the Tides were helping Molly tend to them. Blond hair in the distance caught her attention. She spotted Brooke carrying a jug of water from one person to another.

Aria knelt by Molly. “What’s she doing here?”

Molly drew a blanket over a young girl. “Ah,” she said, looking up and seeing Brooke. “You two didn’t get off to a good start, did you?”

“No . . . but only one of us is responsible for that.”

Molly pursed her lips. “She knows she treated you poorly, and she’s grateful to you for bringing Clara back. This is her way of showing it.”

Brooke must have felt their attention because she looked over, her blue eyes moving from Aria to Molly. Aria saw no apology in them. No gratitude.

“Interesting way of showing it.”

“She is trying,” Molly said. “And she’s a good girl. She’s just had a tough stretch.”

Aria shook her head. Weren’t they all having a tough stretch?

She settled to work, delivering water and medicines to the Dwellers who had stirred. She knew every one of them, but some better than others. Briefly she spoke with a friend of her mother’s, aching for Lumina, and then checked on Rune, Jupiter, and Caleb. Her friends were still barely conscious, but just being near them felt good, nourishing a part of her that had been dormant for months.

Gradually, Perry and Roar faded from her thoughts. Even the pain in her arm did. She immersed herself in work until she heard a pair of familiar voices.

“Can I get some water?” Soren asked. He was sitting up and looked healthy enough to get his own water, but the meeting earlier had drained the color from his face.

Brooke knelt and shoved the jug at him.

“Thanks,” Soren said. He took a slow drink, his gaze never leaving Brooke. Then he grinned and handed the water back. “You know, you’re really pretty for a Savage.”

“Two days ago you vomited all over my sleeve, Dweller. That wasn’t pretty.” Brooke stood, moving to the next patient.

Aria fought back a laugh. She remembered that Brooke and Liv had been close friends. How was Brooke coping? Grief simmered right on the surface with Roar. On his face, in his voice. Where was it in Brooke?

For that matter, what about Perry?

She sighed, looking around her. Would she really contribute to the mission tomorrow with her arm the way it was? Did the Dwellers need her to be here for them? The real source of her apprehension, she knew, was Perry.

How were they supposed to get past the hurt she’d caused him when he wouldn’t even discuss it?

The ring of a bell echoed into the cavern.

“Supper,” Molly said.

It didn’t feel like suppertime. Without the sun, it could’ve been morning or noon or midnight. Aria let out another slow breath, rolling back her shoulders. She’d been helping for a few hours.

After Brooke and a few others left, Molly came over. “Not hungry?”

Aria shook her head. “I don’t want anything.” She wasn’t ready to see Perry or Roar again. She’d grown tired. Her arm ached. Her heart ached.

“I’ll have something sent over for you.” Molly patted her shoulder and left.

When Aria went to check on Caleb again, she found him waking. He blinked at her in confusion. His red hair, a few shades deeper than Paisley’s, was matted down with sweat. Fever had left his lips chapped and his eyes glazed.

He took a slow, artist’s perusal of her face. “I thought you’d be happier to see me.”

She knelt beside him. “I am, Caleb. I’m really happy to see you.”

“You look sad.”

“I was a minute ago, but now I’m not. How could I be, now that you’re with me?”

He smiled softly, and then his gaze drifted around the cavern. “This isn’t a Realm, is it?”

She shook her head. “No. It’s not.”

“I didn’t think so. Who would want to come to a Realm like this?”

She sat, resting her hands on her lap. A knot of pain throbbed deep inside her right bicep. “They wouldn’t . . . but it’s all we have.”

Caleb’s gaze came back to her. “I’m sore everywhere. Even my teeth hurt.”

“Do you want something? I can get you medicine or—”

“No . . . just stay.” He gave her a shaky smile. “Seeing you is good. It’s making me feel better. You’ve changed, Aria.”

“Have I?” she asked, though she knew she had. They used to spend afternoons cruising the art Realms. Seeking out the best concerts, the best parties. She barely recognized the girl she used to be.

Caleb nodded. “Yes. You have. When I get better, I’m going to draw you, changed Aria.”

“Let me know when you’re ready. I’ll get you some paper.”

“Real paper?” he asked, brightening. Caleb had only drawn in the Realms.

She smiled. “That’s right. Real paper.”

The spark of excitement left his eyes, his expression turning serious. “Soren told me what happened. About Ag 6 . . . and Paisley. Have you forgiven him?”

Aria glanced toward Soren, who had fallen asleep nearby. She nodded. “I had to, to get you out. And Soren has DLS—a disease that makes him volatile. But he’s on medications to control it now.”

“Are we sure they work?” Caleb said, with a weak smile.

Aria smiled. If he was making jokes, he couldn’t feel that terrible.

“He wasn’t the reason Pais died,” Caleb said. “It was the fire that got her that night. Not him. He was crying when he told me that. I never thought I’d see Soren cry. I think . . . I think he blames himself. I think he stayed and helped us get out of Reverie because of that night.”

Aria believed it because it was true for her as well. She’d brought Paisley to Ag 6. Because of that night, she’d never again leave someone she loved in need, if she could help it.

Caleb squeezed his eyes shut. “Pain is such a pain, you know? It’s very taxing.”

She knew. Aria lay down, settling in beside him, feeling like she’d found part of herself. She saw her past in Caleb. She saw Paisley and the home she’d lost, and she never wanted to forget them.

“Not exactly the Sistine Chapel, is it?” she asked after a while, staring at the jagged shapes that pierced down from the darkness.

“No, it’s rather purgatorial,” Caleb said. “But if we squint really, really hard, we could imagine it otherwise.”

She pointed with her good hand. “That big one there looks like a fang.”

“Mm-hmm. It does.” Beside her, Caleb’s scrunched his face. “Over there. That one looks like a . . . like a fang.”

“And just to the left? Fang.”

“Wrong. That is clearly an incisor. Wait, no . . . it’s a fang.”

“I’ve missed you, Caleb.”

“I’ve mega missed you.” He peered at her. “I think we all knew it was going to come to this. Everything started to change after that night. You could feel it. . . . But you’re going to get us out of here, right?”

She stared into his eyes, finally clear about where she was needed. She’d do more good on the mission than she would here, regardless of her arm or any lingering tension between her and Perry.

“Yes,” she said. “I am.” She told him about Hess and Sable, and about the mission she’d be part of in the morning.

“So you’re leaving again,” Caleb said when she’d finished. “I guess I’m all right with that.” He yawned and rubbed his left eye, where his Smarteye would have been, then smiled tiredly at her. “The Outsider you were with when we left Reverie—is he the reason you were sad?”

“Yes,” she admitted. “What happened was my mistake, mostly. A few weeks ago, I was trying to protect him, and . . . I ended up hurting him instead.”

“Tricky, but I have an idea. When I fall asleep, go find him and apologize.” He winked at her. “Mostly.”

Aria smiled. She liked that idea a lot.

6

H
ave you chosen your team?” Reef dropped more kindling onto the fire, coaxing the flames to life. “Who are you taking tomorrow?”

Perry rubbed his jaw, watching as the rising firelight brought his friends out of the darkness. The rest of the Six emerged. Molly and Marron, too.

It was late—hours after supper—but he had chosen fresh air over sleep. They followed him outside, one and then two and then eight of them, settling in a circle on the small beach. His closest friends, except Roar and Aria.

Now he saw Reef’s question in all of their eyes. Perry had considered the team he’d take for tomorrow’s mission, and he was sure about his choices, but he expected them to raise some debate.

“Everything here will be fine while you’re away,” Marron said, picking up on his hesitation. “No need to worry.”

“I know,” Perry said. “I know it will be.”

Before he left, he would give the Blood Lord chain around his neck to Marron, entrusting the Tides to his care once again. No one was better suited to look after them.

Perry leaned back, his gaze moving south to a knot of Aether—a storm heading their way. The red flares were mesmerizing. They could have been beautiful.