Iron Kin: A Novel of the Half-Light City (20 page)

First, though, a few minutes surcease for him. If nothing else, it might improve his temper.

I stayed quiet, watching him breathe. Feeling the rhythm of my own breath synchronize with his. His eyes stayed shut and I wondered for a moment if he had fallen asleep, but then decided not. He was more relaxed, but there was still an underlying awareness in his body, and traces of fatigue and pain still tightened his face.

And this was before he was expected to use his powers for us, to deliberately open himself to more pain. I believed in the necessity of the treaty, that the City would fall if we didn’t have it to limit the excesses of the Blood and Beast Kind. Fall for humans, at least.

But I was starting to realize that there was also a cost to keeping the peace. I’d known what Guy risked in the Templars, but he’d been a knight for so much of my life, I was almost inured to that danger. I’d learned how to shut off the worry and anxiety and wall it away in a part of my brain that I could ignore most of the time.

Simon had seemed safe enough once he’d left the Templars for the healers. Yes, his work carried risks, risks that had been amplified with the appearance of Lily in our lives. I hadn’t truly known how much risk until tonight.

And here was another man at risk. One who didn’t even seem to care, like Simon and Guy did. Which made me wonder exactly why I cared about him. Because the truth was, I did. Maybe that was why Holly and Lily had warned me off Fen. Because he could charm and snare an unwary woman. Well, charm me he may have, but I would do my best to avoid the trap. That would just be putting myself at risk of an altogether different kind. Right now I needed to focus on the negotiations.

If I got to be part of them.

If I could convince this man to stay with us. I knew one way to try, of course. That was simple enough. I could give in to temptation and try and snare him first.

I didn’t think he’d fight too hard, even though he might offer a token protest.

As if he could hear my thoughts, Fen stirred, his arm flexing beneath my hand. I fought the temptation to stroke him, to soothe, to run my own hands along the warm skin and see what happened. At his throat, I saw his pulse beating a little too fast.

And that made me wonder what
he
was thinking about. Made my own pulse bump up a notch or two.

Don’t be stupid
, I thought fiercely. I needed to do something to break the air of intimacy that seemed to have stolen into the room and surrounded us, weaving a web that was drawing me closer to him.

I took a breath. “Are you feeling better?”

“Define better.” One eye cracked half open. “My head hurts less.”

“What about your temper?” It was a risky course of conversation, but I had to ask.

The other eye opened and his head lifted. “My temper?”

“You were . . . angry when you left.”

“Don’t you think I had a right to be?”

“I didn’t say you didn’t. I asked how you were feeling.” I pulled my hand away.

Fen winced. I reached to put my hand back and he moved his arm out of reach.

I leaned back in my own chair. If that was how he wanted it, so be it. “Well?”

“What you really want to know is if I’m still going to be part of the delegation.”

Well, so much for skirting the subject. I had to remember that he was quick, this man. “Yes.” I nod
ded, folding my arms across my chest. “Yes, I would like to know the answer to that question.”

“So that you get to go.”

“No. Well, not entirely,” I amended. “I want to know that you’ll do it because I think that we need you, Fen. You might be able to see something coming that no one else has a chance to. Something that might make all the difference.”

“Or I might see nothing. Or kill myself trying. Or get killed.”

Kill himself? Was the pain that bad? He’d added the “or get killed” as an afterthought. Trying to cover up the bit of truth he’d blurted unknowingly.

“If you don’t try, then you’ll definitely see nothing. As for the rest, well, the future is uncertain. You know that better than anyone.” I tried to coax a smile from him. “But I will help you with the pain and I’m sure Simon will too if you ask. There are Fae healers at St. Giles. Lady Bryony or—”

“Bryony sa’Eleniel would want nothing to do with my kind.”

“Bryony? Why would she have any issue with you? She was perfectly civil tonight.”

He looked away. “Tonight was different. You don’t know—”

“I do. And I also know that she has helped both Holly and Lily. And Lily’s a
wraith
.” The Fae hated wraiths. But Bryony had made her peace with Lily. Which meant she should have no issue with Fen’s heritage. “Bryony’s a healer, Fen. She’ll help you if she can.”

“I don’t want any help from the Fae.”

I bit down my retort. Exasperating man. “Have it your way. You’re the one who has to bear the pain.”

“Nice to hear that acknowledged.”

I sighed. I didn’t think that this conversation was going to get any easier. Or any more useful. Lily had been wrong. I should have waited until morning. Let him sleep it off and give him time to think. If Fen was anything like Simon and Guy, he would prefer time on his own to let his temper cool.

Pity that we’re almost out of time
, the waspish voice in my head said.

I stood abruptly. “I should let you sleep.” I looked around for my boots, spotted them a little ways from the chair.

“Going so soon?” His tone was almost nasty and I felt myself flinch a little.

“I don’t think there’s anything else for me to do here.”

“Gods, Saskia . . .”

“What?”

He hesitated, then shook his head. “No. You’re right. You should go.”

“And you should learn some manners,” I snapped, my own temper suddenly biting under the strain of fatigue and confusion and tangled attraction.

“Oh?”

“You could at least thank me for helping you,” I said. “And perhaps see that I got to a ’cab safely.”

“You want thanks?” He seemed to flow out of the chair, his eyes suddenly sparking green. “Really?”

“Yes.”

“Fine. Then let me say thank you, Miss DuCaine.” His voice was almost a growl and I was too distracted by the glare on his face to react when he closed the gap between us with one sudden step and pulled me close.

“Wha—”

The protest died on my lips as his mouth closed over mine.

Chapter Twelve

S
ASKIA

He
tasted dark and dangerous. Hot and sweet. His kiss was fierce, almost desperate, and an answering wave of desperate heat flowed up through me, making me wonder if my chain was burning. But no, it wasn’t the metal that was hot—it was my skin. As though all my nerves had sparked to life with wanting.

The chain against my throat was chill in comparison.

Fen pulled me closer, flush against him, so there was no escaping the evidence that he wanted me too. His erection pressed against me, sending another wave of pleasure shivering over me.

Desire. Gods. I wanted to lose myself in it, to chase away what had happened tonight, but I fought to keep my head above the rising tide of lust. To think rather than feel.

Because desire wasn’t the reason—or at least not the only reason—that he was kissing me, and with that realization came an equal one that if desire wasn’t the reason, then I didn’t
want
him to kiss me.

I pulled away, making the movement even more definite as he tried to pull me back toward him, until I was free from his grasp and several steps separated us.

“What did you do that for?” I said.

He looked both annoyed and half amused. “You wanted me to thank you.”

“You think that’s a thank-you?”

“I don’t usually get complaints.” His pupils were large, darkening his irises to a green like midnight.

“Then you are kissing the wrong sort of women.”

“Oh? What sort would that be?”

“Idiots,” I spat.

“You didn’t seem to mind.”

“Of course I mind!”

“Why? Didn’t you enjoy it?” His eyes narrowed. “You’re not a virgin, are you?”

“I mind,” I said slowly, ignoring his question. I wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction of answering. It was none of his business. “Because you were kissing me to make a point.”

“You’re wrong.”

Wrong? Did he think I was stupid? The chain around my neck suddenly felt very warm as my temper flared and I directed the power into the fire behind me, which suddenly whooshed to furious life. “Is that so? So why did you kiss me exactly?”

His eyes glittered dangerously, his mouth twisting, then relaxing before he spoke. “Because this has been a pretty horrible day, and right now I don’t want someone to hold my hand. What I want is another sort of touch altogether.”

My skin was catching on fire, I was sure of it. His voice seemed to slide over it like warm velvet, stoking the flames higher. “I—”

“Which is why you should leave. Because right now, I figure the only thing that might make me feel better would be tossing up your skirts and fucking you.”

My mind went blank as the breath left my lungs. And then with a rush, filled again with images of him doing exactly that.

My gaze slid to the bed, to the rumpled sheets, the dark velvet counterpane that was a deep and dangerous red. Deep enough to sink into. I could feel the cotton and velvet against my skin as truly as though I lay upon them, pressed into them with the weight of the man before me. The sensation, true or not, ignited another wave of desire, a pulse that started between my legs and exploded out from there so swiftly, I felt my knees tremble.

Control.
I bit my lip, forced my gaze back to Fen. He couldn’t have meant it. He was trying to get me to leave.

I didn’t want to go.

I didn’t want to do the sensible thing, the right thing, the well-behaved-human-girl thing. I wanted what he wanted. Wanted to lose myself in whatever madness caused this heat between us and forget the world beyond the walls for a time.

But the fact remained that he was saying the things he was saying to scare me away.

Or was he?

There was color in his face too and his pupils were dark pools, shading out the green. His breath came, I fancied, a little faster than it should as he watched me.

What would happen were I to call his bluff? And how exactly could I do that?

“You should go,” Fen said, his voice a low hum that seemed to only increase the tension vibrating in the room.

My mouth was dry. I swallowed before replying. “What if I don’t want to?”

“Saskia . . . ,” he said warningly. “Don’t push me. I’m not one of your nice safe human boys.”

“Maybe not. Maybe I’m not who you think I am either.”

“Is that so?” He tilted his head, his expression suddenly intent. “I’m not playing a game here. If you stay, then I’m going to take you to bed. Is that what you want?”

I managed a single nod, unable to look away. Unable to deny what I was feeling.

“Very well. Take off your dress.”

I had the feeling he was still testing, still seeing if I would stay or flee. But even as I tried to work out how I felt about that, my fingers reached for the buttons that held the front of my dress together. One small mercy of wearing one of my student dresses, I could get in and out of it by myself. Only now I wasn’t by myself, was I?

I almost missed the next button at the thought. Glanced down at it to find my place again, glanced back up, hit the wall of Fen’s searing gaze and almost lost my nerve. My fingers trembled but I continued on, freeing the buttons one by one until I was able to shrug my shoulders and have the dress fall to my feet.

Fen sucked in a breath. I stayed very still, very aware of the thinness of the cotton of my chemise and my drawers, of the tightness of my corset against my skin. Of how that skin tingled as Fen watched me, motionless. The silence in the room seemed to sharpen, making the air crystal, likely to shatter with one false move. The only tiny sounds were the breaths we each tried to control.

Through that silence my pulse roared in my ears, a beat that grew stronger and stronger each second I stood there, submitting to his gaze.

Feeling the hunger for him fire within me as if his hands were stroking my body, finding all the places I most liked to be touched. Yet he hadn’t even touched me yet.

How could I stand it when he did?

How could I bear it if he didn’t?

Fen moved then, one step, two. Bringing him close enough that I could feel the heat of his skin, could smell the faint echoes of the cologne he wore and the scent of excited male and a trace of smoke and alcohol. Not close enough to touch, though.

I stayed still, not daring to move. Not wanting to move. Somehow, waiting for him to tell me what to do next was everything I wanted right in this moment, some relief from fighting so hard to be seen. Giving in to someone who saw me perhaps too clearly.

Fen leaned closer, his lips almost touching mine. I wanted his kiss, wanted the taste of him again, but instead he moved to my ear.

“I want you kneeling on the bed. Hands and knees.”

I didn’t know if my legs were even capable of holding me up, but I did as he asked, part of my mind still wondering why. The rest of me knew all too well. I would do whatever it took to get him to touch me, to take me. To ease this hunger he’d ignited and chase away everything else that was tumbling through my head.

The mattress gave beneath me as I climbed onto the bed, the velvet soft against my skin, the combination both welcoming and intimidating. There was no hiding from the truth of what I wanted and what I was going to do here. My arms trembled as I arranged myself as he wanted, tiny tremors that echoed the shivers of sensation that traveled across my skin.

It was tempting to bend my arms, drop my head to the mattress. But that would be hiding. And not what he’d asked of me. Instead I bowed my body sideways so I could look back at Fen.

He hadn’t moved from where he stood. But as I watched he pulled the shirt over his head and dropped it.

Then he moved. Stalked across the room so fluidly that it was clear that he wasn’t entirely human. Something about the way his bones and muscles moved was too swift. Too sleek.

Too wild.

It made me want him even more.

I could feel the pulse of it, beating between my legs, could feel my nipples hard and tight against the confines of my corset. Wanted to rip every scrap of clothing from my body so that there was nothing to stop him from touching me.

I’d never felt this before. The sheer wanting of it.

Madness.

I was happy to lose my sanity if that was the case.

Fen stopped at the foot of the bed, his eyes locked with mine.

“Look away,” he said.

I moved my head, gazed straight ahead, feeling the loss of eye contact like a wound. I held myself there, feeling as though I might just come apart entirely if he didn’t touch me soon.

One heartbeat. Two. Three.
Four
. My nerves tightened, stretched, quivered. I fought to stay still, not to turn around or roll over and scream, “Take me.”

And then it came. The flat of his hand stroked the length of my spine, caressing me from nape to hip. Then both hands seized my chemise, clenched, ripped, let the ruined cotton and lace fall off me. Then they returned, stroking my skin, circling restlessly, yet carefully. Coming near all the places I wanted to be touched, dipping toward the slide of my buttocks and drifting down my sides a little but never quite touching me.

I bit my lip, trying not to moan. I managed to stay silent, but I couldn’t quite still the impatient arches and dips of my body as it responded to his touch.

“Like that, do you?” His voice sounded rough, hungry. “Good.”

His hands slid up my back again, slowly this time, so I could feel the small pauses as his palms slid over the small obstacles of the lacing of my corset. I held my breath, sure that he would free them. I wanted him to. My breasts ached, nipples screaming to be released, to feel his fingers and his mouth. But he didn’t. Instead he tracked the curves of my corset, the places where it drew my waist in, contouring the lines of my body. His hands slid down, then around, and then, finally, finally up to my breasts, cupping them through the satin and cotton, the pressure of his hands only deepening the longing to be able to really feel him.

His hands pulled the fabric tighter against my skin, so it scraped the too sensitive buds of my nipples and I moaned and pushed into him.

“Gods.” The word was soft but urgent. His hands moved again, sweeping around to my back, sliding down, down, until he was gripping my thighs, pulling me back against him, so I finally—finally—felt the hard length of him against me. I moaned again and he moved away, his hands repeating their tearing act with my drawers this time.

I went still as he pulled them free. Gods indeed. I was bare to him now, nowhere to hide or go or pretend. He could, no doubt, see the evidence that I wanted him.

“A little farther up the bed,” he said, and I could hear the fierceness of him in his voice. Knew suddenly that he was struggling for control just as I was.

Gloried in the knowledge.

I made my movements slow, deliberate, as I eased myself a little farther up the mattress. Took the stance he wanted again. Held myself there against every instinct I had to beg him to come close again. I closed my eyes, not willing to look.

I heard the rustle of cotton, then felt the mattress dip as he climbed up behind me.

Felt him slide against me, his cock slipping between my legs, rubbing against me as he put his thighs either side of mine. “Gods,” he muttered again as for a few seconds I couldn’t help arching against him, easing the ache between my legs against him, feeling pinwheels and starbursts of pleasure with each slippery contact.

I didn’t have long to tease him. His control was slipping as fast as mine. His hands tightened on my hips and he pulled himself back and then took me with one hard thrust that felt so good I almost came.

But that would be too easy.

“Not yet,” he said roughly, and he eased back, then thrust again. Long and slow and fierce, setting a rhythm that wiped every thought from my head. I didn’t know if he was taking me or I was taking him as he drove me higher and higher.

Slow became faster, then faster again. His breath was fast and rough and mingled with my gasps. I felt myself begin to quiver around him and one of his hands slid around and pressed once, hard and sharp, and I came with a shuddering moan, sliding forward in a boneless heap of pleasure.

“Oh no,” he said. “We’re not done yet.”

He freed himself, rolled me over and settled himself against me once more, not yet sliding home. The feel of him made all the nerves that were still pulsing with delight shiver and tremble all over again. I lifted my arms above my head, lazy with satisfaction. Fen’s eyes were dark, wild almost. He reached up to grip my wrists and his chain brushed my skin, the iron a sudden shock.

“Take it off,” I said.

He froze. His pupils flared wider as he studied me. I didn’t know why I was asking what I was. Only knew that I wanted him as naked as he had me.

“Just us,” I said.

He nodded once then, slowly eased back a little so he could undo the chain. He unwound it carefully, hissing at one point as though it hurt, then dropped it over the side of the bed.

“You can’t stop touching me now,” he said. “I want you against me.”

A smile stretched my lips. “I can do that.” I settled myself, draped my legs around him, arching to invite him back in.