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Authors: Johanna Nicholls

BOOK: Ironbark
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His gut lurched at the sight of Keziah on the veranda watching his approach. The breeze whipped her skirt around her legs and her hair flew around her face. Even in her oldest dress she was bloody beautiful.

Jake saw the flash of fear in her eyes when she recognised the second horse.

‘That's Sarishan, isn't it! What's wrong, Jake?'

His voice stuck in his throat. Where did he find the right words to begin?

But Keziah only had to look into his eyes to know. She held up her hands and backed away to block the words she could not bear to hear. The dead expression in her eyes made his job even tougher.

‘I wish it wasn't me that has to do this to you, mate,' he said, ‘but I reckon you'd rather hear it from me than read it in some rag of a newspaper.'

‘It's Gem,' she said in a voice that didn't seem to belong to her. She sank down onto the bed, clutching her shawl and shivering with cold despite the heat from the log fire.

Jake tried to block any images in his mind on the off-chance she could see them.

‘Yeah, mate. I heard it straight from an eyewitness. Gem was sprung
by the traps somewhere around Camden Park. The bastards wanted to avoid any uprising of public sympathy. So they transferred him to Cockatoo Island Gaol. They say Gem broke free and tried to swim across to the shore to Birch Grove Farm but—'

‘Gem's a poor swimmer!'

‘He almost made it but the word is he drowned.'

Keziah struggled with the reality of Jake's news. ‘You're lying! Gem didn't drown.'

Jake didn't believe in any god but he prayed anyway.
Jesus wept. Please don't let her see what really happened.

But he knew it was too late. It was as if she looked inwards to the moment of Gem's fight for life. Her voice was filled with horror.

‘I can see his face in the water. The shark fins, his blood staining the water red!'

Jake was shocked by the accuracy of her vision. She relayed to him details that came from the warder at Cockatoo who'd witnessed the escape. Jake was chilled by the expression in her eyes. She seemed on the verge of retreating into madness to escape the ghastly visions. He grabbed hold of her shoulders and shook her.

‘Listen to me! That came
after
. Gem never knew! He never even saw the sharks! An eyewitness saw it all. Gem had already drowned. I swear to God,
he died free like he wanted
!'

It was the biggest lie of Jake's life.

The wildness of Keziah's grief stunned him. He allowed her to pummel him in hysteria.

‘It's all right, Kez, let it all out!' He lay beside her on the bed and held her in his arms. She clung to him like a life raft until, at last, she fell asleep, exhausted. He rocked her all through the night each time her body was racked by sobs.

No woman has ever loved me the way Keziah loved Gem.

He could never tell her the shocking truth of Gem's death. He prayed that she would never hear the full story that came from that
warder at Cockatoo Island. The bastard had boasted about how no felon's corpse ever left the island. Because the warders fed the convicts' bodies to the bloody sharks!

• • • 

At dawn Jake lit a fire in the fuel stove and made Keziah a pot of tea.

She drank like an obedient child but Jake was worried by the way she looked through him as if he wasn't there.

He hated the strange, unfamiliar quality in her voice as she repeated the words in a whisper, ‘I don't want to live anymore.'

How the hell was he going to break through her terrible grief? At first he tried to reason with her using soothing words, which failed. Finally, he took a calculated risk.

‘Call yourself a mother, do you? You're going to dump Gabriel just like Jenny ran out on me? Like your
gaujo
mam ran out on you? I didn't reckon on
you
being a coward.'

Jake saw the glimmer of fire in her eyes. She remained silent for some time, but he sensed she was working things through. Finally she said the words he was desperate to hear.

‘You're right. Gabriel will keep me alive.'

‘Too bloody right he will! That kid's got more sense in his little finger than Gipps and the whole Brit government put together.'

He pulled her to her feet. ‘Come on. You've got a school full of kids to teach. But first things first, Gabe's waiting for his breakfast. And me, I could eat a horse.'

‘You'd
what
?'

‘All right! I know how you Romanies worship horses. I promise you I'll never eat a horse as long as I live. That make you happy?'

Gabriel clambered up on his stool in his nightshirt and looked expectantly at his empty bowl of porridge.

Red-eyed, Keziah automatically resumed her maternal role. ‘Haven't you forgotten something, Gabriel? Wash your hands and face. And then?'

‘Thank
The Del
for my daily bread,' he said, then ran barefoot to the pitcher to wash.

‘Nice boy you got there,' said Jake. ‘His mother's not too bad, either.'

Jake watched as she walked slowly out to the horse paddock. He sensed what she planned to do before she did it.

Keziah rubbed her face against Sarishan's nose, talking to him in the Romani tongue. Jake couldn't understand the words but he had no doubt about the message. Kez was sharing her love, her grief. Giving and taking deep comfort from Gem's horse.

Keziah didn't know it yet but Sarishan was only the first half of what Gem had willed to Jake. He knew this was no time to tell her the second half. Maybe he never would.

CHAPTER 36

For months after the news of Gem's death Keziah moved through her life like an actress trapped on stage in a play which was only revealed to her one page at a time. She fought hard to concentrate on the needs of her little family and her schoolchildren but at night she fell asleep exhausted by the effort to appear cheerful and normal.

Jake had called regularly to check on her during Daniel's prolonged absence in Bolthole Valley where Gilbert Evans had engaged him to build a Sunday school hall. But when Jake needed to head off he arranged for Dr Ross to check that she wanted for nothing. From the professional way Dr Ross observed her, Keziah knew he was concerned that she was suffering from melancholia.

How could she explain to the good doctor that she was mourning the death of a famous bushranger who had been her first husband? She had to keep up her public face as Saranna Browne. In Jake's absence, only Nerida was aware of the true cause of her sorrow.

Her memories of Gem were locked deep inside her, but as autumn passed without breaking the drought, the birth of spring and then summer gradually brought her a renewed surge of energy. Finally the day arrived when Keziah felt she had reached a mountain top and could see what lay on the other side. The future.

She set the black metal iron to heat on top of the stove as she re-read Daniel's recent letter.

I promise to make it back home in time for Joseph Bloom's celebration. Oh by the way, Julian Jonstone's offered to pay my fees to study art in Sydney Town. Most generous of him, but of course I'd never leave you and Gabriel high and dry.

But between every line Keziah sensed his longing to take up the offer, his golden opportunity.

On his return she knew what she must tell him. She said the words out loud to be sure they held the ring of truth. ‘It's time for you to be faithful to your mistress, Daniel.' Yes, it was true.

She was relieved when the iron was finally hot enough to press the new gown she had been sewing frantically all week. The thought of Joseph Bloom's banquet tonight brought a wave of anticipation, a flutter of nerves.

She dragged the heavy iron across a white rag to check it would leave no sooty marks on the silk water-veined taffeta. She had bought the entire bolt of fabric from Sunny Ah Wei to ensure that no other woman in Ironbark would appear in the same material. Tonight she must look her very best. Jake had promised Joseph Bloom he'd return to Ironbark in time for the celebration – and everyone knew Jake Andersen's word was his bond.

Although she had not seen Jake for weeks Keziah had the strong conviction Jenny would soon return from New Zealand. In her dreams she was haunted by the face in Daniel's drawing that Jake carried around with him. How she hated that small, delicate blonde temptress – the woman was everything that she was not. No doubt Jake's obsession would draw him back into his wife's arms if Jenny chose to crook her finger at him. Keziah had to act fast.

After washing her hair in rosemary oil she sat in the sun to dry it. She re-read last week's newspaper account of how Caleb Morgan, the sole survivor of his ill-fated expedition, was being lionised by society in South Australia.

Despite Caleb's heroic failure the Morgan name was now being heaped with the glory she had predicted years ago reading his palm. No doubt people would take up a handsome public subscription for him.
I'll bet the native guide who carried him across the desert and saved his life will never be rewarded one penny. The newspapers don't
even say his true name, just some
gaujo
nickname.

Keziah glanced at the drawer where she kept the precious document drawn up by Joseph Bloom, the proof she had legally adopted the babe abandoned in Ironbark. She was ready to meet Caleb's fight for custody, armed with this adoption paper, a legal husband who would stand by her in court and above all her best mate. At the thought of Jake she told herself to remain calm, but she was so distracted when she tried to push the image of his face from her mind that he would
not
go.

As she dressed in the layers of petticoats needed to bell out the skirt of her new gown, she felt cheered that her long ago prophecy for Joseph Bloom had come true. Before his departure he had confided in her the reasons for his journey.

‘I am going to Sydney Town to be married. No doubt you've heard the wild claims by Ironbark gossips. That it is an arranged marriage, my bride speaks no English and brings me a dowry of gold bullion.' He gave a tolerant shrug. ‘The truth is Rivka is my cousin and far from wealthy. Her dowry consists solely of her beloved pianoforte. We were childhood sweethearts in Frankfurt am Main.'

‘How romantic!' Keziah exclaimed.

‘Not in the eyes of my uncle. He claimed that New South Wales is the Sodom and Gomorrah of the South Pacific and refused permission, quoting our proverb, ‘Away from Frankfurt, gone is the soul'. In his eyes, Mrs Browne, I am a dangerous radical.
Me?'

‘What made him change his mind?' Keziah asked.

Joseph Bloom's eyes twinkled. ‘He did not. Rivka's mother paid for her passage and bundled her onto a ship bound for Port Jackson. I go to meet her now.'

Keziah smiled at the memory of their shared laughter. But next moment she was sobered by the thought of Joseph's plans to open his own legal practice in Sydney Town.

Her vision instantly reverted to the frightening flash of a courtroom and Joseph in a barrister's wig. Criminal law. Murder! She sensed the
reality of this premonition was drawing closer and that Jake was right at the heart of it. She tried to push the vision aside, determined to seize and enjoy the moment. Tonight was Joseph's celebration to introduce Rivka to their Ironbark friends. Keziah knew in her heart that when Daniel accompanied her it would be their final public appearance.

Her world was changing so fast it made her dizzy. In the
goondie
she kissed Gabriel goodnight. Then she hurried down the track, trying to rein in her hair while fighting to prevent the wind ballooning out her skirt. She felt a wild surge of elation.
Weddings are famous for kindling new love affairs. The timing is perfect.

• • • 

Jake scanned the guests for a sign of Keziah. Everyone and his dog had been invited to meet Joseph's Hebrew bride.

Jake saw Rivka Bloom through a break in the crowd of guests milling on the lawn behind the Bloom homestead. She looked a bit overcome in a sea of strangers who all spoke English so Jake gave her a broad wink to reassure her. At first glance Jake had thought Rivka a bit on the dumpy side but now as she smiled back at him her luminous dark eyes and gentle smile transformed her into a beauty. Jake was forced to admit it – good women in love were a race apart.

He was startled to find Daniel standing beside him looking serious.

‘Could we have a quiet drink later, Jake? I'm off to Sydney Town and I've got a favour to ask you about Keziah.'

Jake hesitated. Neither of them had ever referred to their drunken brawl at Scotty's hut. Long gone, it was too confusing to think about. Jake had heard no further rumours of Daniel's philandering and their friendship had been resumed, although with a guarded undercurrent.

‘Righto, Dan. I reckon I'll still be here drinking Joseph's grog by breakfast.'

Jake watched Daniel circle the edge of the crowd in a clockwise direction, clearly unaware that Keziah's bobbing head could be seen
circling anticlockwise. Finally husband and wife came face to face. They stood stock-still for a moment. Jake couldn't hear their words but it was clear they were engaged in an amiable battle of wills. Each time Daniel shook his head in denial, Keziah adamantly nodded her head to oppose him. Until finally Daniel threw back his head laughing and bent to kiss her forehead. When they turned away from each other, both were smiling. Daniel crossed to chat to Leslie Ross who had donned his kilt in honour of meeting the bride.

Jake stiffened when he realised Keziah was heading his way. She stopped in front of him, her head tilted to one side. Her innocent smile encompassed him and the two men standing nearby. George Hobson eyed her like a concerned father. Gilbert Evans wore his usual air of suspicion. Keziah seemed blithely unaware of them both.

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