Read John the Revelator Online
Authors: Peter Murphy
She rubbed her eyes with the heels of her hands. Her mascara was coal-smudged.
âNigerian.' She buried her face in her hands. âI'm sorry.'
It came out muffled.
Gunter sat down heavily, like he'd been hit hard in the gut.
So this is what it's like when someone breaks your heart,
he thought.
You feel it in your stomach, not your chest. You want to throw up.
The whiskey tasted bitter in his mouth and he felt so dizzy he thought he might collapse. He put his hand on the table to steady himself.
âSit,' he said, as though giving orders to a dog. He went to the cupboard and took out a second tumbler, dumped whiskey in, pushed it towards her.
âWe're not done talking.'
She knocked it back.
He poured a refill. Anaesthetic.
âI want details.'
âDetails?'
Her look was withering, but her voice betrayed a tremor.
âEverything.' He took her phone out of her bag and turned it off. âEvery. Last. Thing.'
And he started in with more questions. He wouldn't stop, not until he knew every pornographic fact. The answers hurt, but still he had to find out.
Who else knows?
When was the first time you kissed?
Did he use the tongue?
How deep?
Show me. Use your finger.
Did you undress in front of him, or did you make him turn off the light the way you make me?
Did you make noises while you were doing it?
What kind of noises? Make them now.
Did he put it in by himself or did you put it in for him?
Did you take him in your mouth?
Did he come?
Did you gag?
Spit?
Or swallow?
Was it bigger than mine?
It went on and on until she broke down and swore on her mother's grave that she'd never see the boy again. Gunter waved her away, disgusted, and she fled to the bedroom.
He called Fintan and Davy and told them to meet up in Donahue's.
âFirst thing,' Gunter told them, âfind out where he drinks. Then report back to me. I don't just want to hurt this prick. I want to fuck with his head too.'
Fintan sniggered as he got up to leave.
âUdechukwu,' he said. âWhat a name.'
They left Gunter at the bar thinking ugly thoughts, all of which could've been reduced to a single name repeated like a mantra as he worked himself up into a state.
Udechukwu, Udechukwu, Udechukwu...
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Two days later, when Jude Udechukwu showed up for work at the petrol station, he went to his locker, as he always did, to change into his overalls. The locker door swung open when he grasped the handle. Inside was a chicken's foot, caked with blood.
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Over the next couple of days, Gunter and Maggie tiptoed around each other, picking their way through unfamiliar territory. They both avoided the subject of her indiscretions, afraid it might blow up into a row neither of them had the stomach for. Maggie spent most of her time asleep. If she stayed in that scratcher much longer, Gunter figured, she'd get bedsores. Dirty dishes stacked up in the sink. There was nothing to eat. He was pouring stale cornflakes into a small saucepan when his phone went off. Davy, ringing from Donahue's.
âLooks like he didn't take the hint,' said Davy. âHe's here, all on his tod. I don't know what she sees in him. He ain't the size of a gnat.'
Gunter told him what to do and hung up.
Maggie padded in, still wearing her slob clothes, a baggy hoodie and a pair of leggings.
âWho was that?'
Gunter stepped on the bin pedal and dumped cornflakes into the smelly liner bag.
âDavy.' He put the saucepan on top of the crockery heap. âI'm going to meet him for one in Donahue's.'
âOK.'
âFucking right it is.'
Maggie flinched like she'd been slapped, like she might turn on the waterworks again. Gunter turned his back to her, put on his jacket and went outside. He kick-started the bike and roared off, down the old beach road towards the abandoned slaughterhouse.
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They beat the lard out of him. Beat him until he shrieked, protesting his innocence the whole time, but they ignored his squeals and went about the business of hurting him like it was a job of work. At some point, Gunter realised his bone was hard and he wanted to stop and go away and figure out what that meant, but the boys kept egging him on and he couldn't lose face so he kept driving his steel-capped boots into the boy's ribs until he was a broken heap sobbing on the ground.
Gunter woke with his knuckles swollen and one of the buckles on his motorcycle boots torn off, but somehow he felt more solid in his centre. That awful churning feeling was gone. So was the disturbing boner. All day long he turned jobs on the lathe, a satisfying ache in his muscles. Even the girls in the office remarked on his good mood. âJazes, Gunter, you must be getting some,' remarked the cute young Cullen one in passing.
When he got home, the squad car was parked outside the flat. Jim Canavan was leaning on the roof, smoking one of those cheap skinny cigars. Gunter dismounted and dragged the bike onto its stand.
âJim.'
âHop in,' Canavan said, got behind the wheel and sprung the passenger door. Gunter squeezed his bulk into the car and adjusted the seat. Whoever had been sitting there last was a midget.
âYou know why I'm here,' Canavan said.
âI've a fair idea.'
âThing is, he's gone and filed a complaint.'
Gunter nodded.
âI'll come down to the barracks.'
âNo need.'
âAh?'
Gunter raised an eyebrow.
âI'll take care of it,' Canavan said. âBut might want to think ahead next time you decide to hammer the hell out of some young lad, Gunter. You keep fucking up, I keep bailing you out. I'm not careful, you'll cost me my pension. This is the last time.'
He twisted the key in the ignition. Gunter opened the door and got out.
Maggie was lying on the couch under her duvet. Her eyes were red and swollen. Gunter sat on the arm of the chair and put his hand on her head. She pulled away.
âYou promised you wouldn't do anything,' she said.
Gunter shrugged.
âI changed my mind.'
She got up and went into the bedroom, dragging the duvet behind like a bloated wedding train.
âYou're just like the rest of them,' she said. âA bastard.'
I stuffed the papers into my jeans, closed my eyes and tried to block out the throbbing in my head. All night I dozed in my mother's armchair until the birds woke me. Disjointed images, dream residue, seeped into the dawn light. My mother came downstairs. With every footstep my heart beat faster.
âJesus, Mary and â
Joseph,
' she said, hand covering her mouth as she stood in the kitchen doorway. âWere you in a fight?'
âI wouldn't call it that.'
My teeth didn't seem to fit together any more and my face felt like rubber. She fussed around, poking my ribs and pawing at my scalp and moving my arms like I was a doll or an action man. I told her some story about three total strangers jumping me on the street. She closed her eyes as if waiting for a migraine to pass.
âWhoever they were,' she said, âthey were amateurs. The head is the hardest part of the body. If they wanted to do real damage, they'd have gone for your ribs.'
It didn't feel like an amateur job to me. I was about to say as much but the phone cut me off. My mother frowned.
âWho in the name of god is ringing this early?' She twisted the ends of her hair around smoke-browned fingers. âWill you get it?'
It was Jamey's mother, almost hysterical, speaking so fast I thought I'd faint from the intensity.
âI've been up all night,' she said. âJamey was due home yesterday evening but he never showed. Have you heard anything?'
I told her me and Jamey hadn't spoken in weeks.
âOh lord,' she said, âI was hoping you'd seen him.'
My mother hovered over my shoulder and mouthed, âWho-is-it?' but I waved her away and turned my back.
âIf you hear anything,' Dee was saying, âcall me, please. No matter what.'
Her voice started to crack as she thanked me and hung up.
âWell?' my mother said.
âIt was Mrs Corboy.'
âWhat did she want?'
âJamey's gone AWOL. She wanted to know if I'd seen him.'
She narrowed her eyes.
âAnd have you?'
âI haven't seen Jamey since his exams finished.'
She lit a cigarette. The nurse in the clinic always gave out to her for smoking before breakfast. Always put something in your stomach first, she nagged.
âI'm sure he'll turn up,' my mother said.
I crawled upstairs to bed and didn't wake until midday, nauseous with hunger.
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The holidays moved inexorably towards their end. My face came up in bruises and I barely left the house for fear of running into Gunter and his cronies. One morning I came downstairs and my mother was at the kitchen table, unwrapping tinfoil from a cake.
âThe dead arose and appeared to many,' she said. âLook. Mrs Nagle sent us a barnbrack. She wants to make the peace.'
âShe'll never learn.'
âNor will I.'
She put the cake in the fridge and made a cup of tea and stood at the back door gazing out.
âThat's the last of the summer,' she said, squinting at the sun, a watery orb suspended in the sky. âWe should make the best of it. C'mon, I'll pack a lunch and we'll rent a couple of bikes from Tyrell's and go to the beach. The exercise will do us good.'
I got dressed while she made sandwiches and packed them into a wicker picnic basket. She instructed me to fetch a blanket from the press and began unplugging stuff and locking up the house and then she shooed me out the door.
We walked into the village and collected the bikes from Tyrell's. My mother sat up on the saddle and smoked one last fag and then we set off out the old beach road. We had to dismount and walk the bikes up the steep gradient of the hills, but once over the crest we could freewheel for ages. The breeze in our faces made everything feel fresh, a relief from the muggy August heat. We made good time, and soon enough the roads grew narrower and the air was coarse with salt and specks of windblown sand. Gulls swooped and dived and fought the sea breeze. The fields seemed to draw back, blazing yellow. We heard the tide before we saw it, and as we crested the final hill it was like a blind flew up and the sea yawned wide and the feeling was almost vertiginous.
We hid the bikes in the reeds and strode down the sandy slope. Waves roared and foamed and dashed themselves against the strand. We walked for ages, venturing further down the coast than I'd ever been before. It felt as though we were travelling back in time, pioneers in an unpeopled world. We had to pause every so often while my mother got her breath.
At last we came to a deserted horseshoe-shaped inlet. There was a cave eaten into the cliff face, its jagged overbite about head height, the jaws crammed with rock deposits shaped like fangs, coated with moss and oddly shaped barnacles. Midges and flies buzzed about the beached starfish and stringy clumps of seaweed. My mother took the blanket from me and spread it under the arch of the cave mouth where there was shelter from the sun and wind.
âWhat is this place?' I said.
âBlowhole Cove.'
It was eerily quiet. My mother settled herself on the blanket and unpacked the basket. She unscrewed the cap off the flask and gazed out across St George's Channel and watched birds shriek and dive-bomb the water. Herons and gulls prospected for lugworms, picking their steps prissily across the dun sandbars of the sloblands.
âY'know,' she said, pouring tea into the cap, âwhen I was a girl, we came to see a turlhyde whale that washed up right here in this very spot.'
She paused to blow on her tea.
âThe bossâthat was what we called my fatherâthe boss was usually very strict, but he allowed we'd never see a thing like that again, so he gave us the day off. I'll never forget it.'
My mother hardly ever mentioned her family. I wondered why she was bringing them up now.
âHow did the whale end up here?'