Joshua and the Cowgirl (21 page)

“I’m not asking you to give it up. I’m only asking you to share it.”

“Oh, Joshua. It sounds so simple, but you know it’s not that easy.”

“Isn’t it? Can’t you do that much at least? Can’t you let me become a part of the life you’ve created here? Marry me and let me replace all those painful memories with new ones, happy ones.”

A beat passed, then another. When she didn’t reply, he upped the ante. “I’ll even move out here, if that’s what it takes.”

She wanted to believe in him, to grab at his offer to live here, but she could hear the reluctance in his voice. She wanted so much to accept his promise to be there for her always, but too many people had let her down. First her parents. Then Nicky. She didn’t dare take a chance, didn’t dare risk everything she had. And she couldn’t ask him to give up a place he loved to live here with her. Finally she shook her head. “I can’t. The past has a way of repeating itself.”

“I’ll never hurt you,” he promised. “I won’t let anyone hurt you again.”

“I’m the only one who can do that.”

“By keeping this wall around you?”

“Yes, if that’s what it takes.”

“And what about Casey?”

Garrett frowned at the question. “Casey is just fine.”

“Is she? Then why does she have so many unanswered questions about her father? Have you ever told her what you just told me?”

“It would break her heart to know her father didn’t want her.”

“I’m sure she’s already guessed as much. It’s the uncertainty that really hurts her. Maybe that’s none of my business, though. She’s your daughter and you have to decide what she deserves to know. It is my business that the bond that was growing between Casey and me was deliberately broken. I will never understand why you felt the need to do that.”

“Because she needs to know she shouldn’t count on anyone.”

“No,” he said. “Casey knew she could trust me. In her heart, she believed in me from the very beginning. You’re the one who planted the seed of distrust in her mind. Is that your way of protecting her? Will you let her grow into a lonely, frightened woman like her mother?”

As the harsh words sank in, Garrett shuddered. She thought of her lovely, beautiful, gregarious daughter living the kind of hard life she had chosen for herself.

As if he knew that he’d struck home, Joshua said, “Just think about it, Garrett. Think about how much you’re robbing from Casey. Think of your daughter, if you won’t think of yourself.”

And then he walked away, leaving her with her bitter memories and her shattered dreams. Tonight, through Joshua’s eyes, she had seen the two twisted somehow into one sad, painful vision of an endless, lonely future.

* * *

For weeks after Joshua had gone, Garrett went around in a daze. She was moody and irritable. It was Red who finally snapped her out of her self-pity.

“Seems to me you’re wasting time,” he said, lounging in the big leather chair beside her desk.

They had spent the day going over reports and making decisions about marketing the cattle. There were fence repairs to be made, as well. Garrett’s mind was on all of that, so it took a few minutes for her wandering attention to shift gears. “Sorry,” she apologized. “I know I’ve been distracted lately.”

“If you ask me, what you’ve been is lovesick. Ever since Joshua went back east, you’ve been looking like you’ve lost your last friend. Why don’t you marry the man and put us all out of our misery.”

“You know how I feel about marriage.”

“Of course, I do. You told me every time I was fool enough to ask you. Course when it was me doing the asking, it made some sense. You never had a thing for me, the way you do for that greenhorn.”

“Joshua is not a greenhorn,” she defended automatically.

“About as close as a man can get. Never mind, though. That isn’t the point. Why are you being so mule-headed, when you know it’s what you want?”

“Habit,” she said slowly, realizing as she said it that it was a good measure of the truth. The gut-wrenching fear that had kept other men at bay no longer applied when it came to Joshua. She knew in her heart he could be trusted. As he’d said, Casey had felt it instinctively and he’d proved it time and time again.

“A danged fool habit, if you ask me.”

Her spirits suddenly began to soar. “It is, isn’t it?” she murmured. Suddenly she was on her feet, flinging her arms around the startled foreman.

“Whoa,” he said, setting her away from him. “You’re hugging the wrong man.”

“But you’re the one who made me see what’s been in front of my face all along. Now how the devil do I show Joshua that I’m ready to take the next step in our relationship?”

“You might consider calling him.”

She thought of all the inventive ways he’d found to court her and shook her head. “Too boring.”

“I doubt the man’s looking for fireworks. A simple
I do
would probably suit him just fine.”

She grinned as her plan began to take shape. “There’s more than one way to get the message across.”

Red’s eyes narrowed. “You going to Florida? I could manage around here for a while, if that’s what you’ve a mind to do.”

“Thanks, I’d really appreciate it. I promise not to be gone long.”

“Still say you could settle things mighty quick with a phone call. Let him foot the bill for the plane ride.”

She grinned. “But what would the fun be in that? I’m going for something he’ll remember for the rest of his life.”

* * *

“Suzy, where the hell’s the damned report?” Joshua shouted, prowling around the confines of his office. The wall-to-wall spread of glass facing the ocean did nothing to ease his claustrophobia or to soothe his frayed temper.

“Suzy?” he bellowed.

The door opened a crack and Cal stuck his head in. “Is it safe to come in or has this been declared a war zone?”

Joshua ran his fingers through his hair, then gestured Cal in. “I suppose Suzy would tell you to enter at your own risk.”

“Having a bad day?”

“A bad month.”

“Still no word from Garrett.”

His gaze shot to Cal. “How did you know about that?”

Cal rolled his eyes. “You couldn’t possibly be that dense. The phone lines between Wyoming and Ocala have been burning up since the minute you hightailed it away from the ranch with us. Marilou vowed if I didn’t drive over here today to talk to you, she was coming herself. Having been the target of one of her well-intentioned campaigns, I thought I’d better save you the grief.”

Joshua’s irritation rose. “Are they all blaming this on me? I’m not the one who said no. I asked the woman to marry me, flat-out begged her, even if it meant having to give up all this and live in that godforsaken hellhole. That sacrifice alone ought to tell you exactly how serious my intentions were.”

“Were?”

“Are. Hell, I don’t know anymore. The woman has the stubborn constitution of a mule. Maybe she’s right. Maybe I am a lousy bet. Maybe all men are lousy bets.”

“I take exception to that on my behalf and yours. You’ve avoided marriage for thirty-seven years. I seriously doubt that you’re going to change your life-style on some whim. You must be in love.”

“Tell that to Garrett.”

“As a matter of fact, I have. So has Marilou. So has my grandmother. Apparently so has Casey. My grandmother says Casey’s threatened to move to the main house if her mother doesn’t marry you. She must be feeling pretty ganged up on by now.”

Joshua sank into his chair. “See what I mean? The woman is hopeless.”

“She loves you, though, right? There’s no question in your mind about that?”

“She loves me. I’d bet my entire stock portfolio on it and you know how seriously I take that.”

“Then get yourself back out there and wear her down. Prove it to her. Open an office and relocate your headquarters. Buy a house. Hell, buy some cattle.”

Joshua’s eyes widened in horror. “Are you out of your mind?”

Cal grinned. “I don’t think so. Can you imagine a better wedding present for a woman who’s always dreamed of owning her own spread? Put it in her name. Let her know that it’ll be hers, no matter what happens between the two of you in the future, that she’ll have her security and her independence.”

“In other words, buy her.”

“A cynic might see it that way. A romantic wouldn’t.”

“I have never, in my entire life, met anyone less romantic and more cynical than Garrett.”

“Joshua, are you blind? Experience has taught her that. Give her new experiences. A little wining and dining. I thought you were an expert.”

“She doesn’t trust my motives.”

“Because you haven’t made the one, grand gesture that could convince her. Make the commitment to Wyoming and a life with her, a commitment she can see, and her doubts will vanish.”

Joshua shook his head. “And if they don’t?”

“If I know you, you’ll turn the ranch into the biggest cattle operation in Wyoming and sell it at a tidy profit. You can’t lose.”

The idea began to hold a certain appeal. It was just quirky and dramatic enough to convince her. “Are you smart enough to dream this up on your own?”

Cal chuckled. “Are you kidding? No man thinks this deviously. Grandmother and Marilou say it’s a surefire solution.”

“I don’t suppose your grandmother knows of a cattle operation that’s on the market,” he said wryly.

“As a matter of fact,” Cal said, drawing some papers from his back pocket, “here’s the prospectus on a place she thinks would be just about perfect. It came by express mail this morning.”

As Joshua scanned the papers, his eyebrows rose in disbelief. “This is half the damned state.”

“I think it’s the part Grandmother doesn’t already own.”

“I don’t suppose she has any advice on financing.”

“Well…” He handed over a mortgage application with her banker.

“She doesn’t miss a trick, does she?”

“You don’t get to be one of the most powerful ranchers in the state by not going after what you want.”

“Is there a message in there for me, as well?”

“Could be, my friend. Could be.”

Joshua folded the papers and tucked them into his briefcase. “Suzy!”

The secretary peeked around the door, but refused to set foot in the room. “It’s safe,” he told her. “Book me on the first flight back to Cheyenne.”

“Take my plane,” Cal offered. “It’s fueled and waiting.”

“I hate your pilot. He still thinks he’s flying war missions.”

“He is fast.”

Now that he’d made up his mind, speed was a consideration. And Cal’s plane did have a phone in it. With any luck he could wrap up the negotiations for the land en route and present the deed to Garrett within a few hours after his arrival.

“Make sure there’s plenty of Scotch on board,” he told Cal. “I may need it, especially if there’s another damned foot of snow on the ground.”

“Done. Good luck, my friend.”

“Something tells me I’m going to need it.”

An hour later he was in the air and on the phone. The owner of the property was anxious to retire and get away to someplace warm. Joshua thought of his condo in Florida. If he was going to do this, there could be no looking back.

“I may have a solution for you there,” he said. Twenty minutes later they had a deal.

“Damn, this better work,” he muttered as the phone rang.

“Hey, boss, how’s the weather up there?” Suzy inquired.

“Smooth. Anything happening I need to know about?”

“Does the fact that your office is filled with white roses mean anything?”

“White roses?” he repeated weakly.

“At last count there were twelve dozen and they’re still coming. The florist seems a bit confused that he’s not actually decorating a hotel ballroom for a wedding. Wait a sec. Someone new just came in and this one’s not bearing flowers.”

His head reeling, Joshua waited for more. The roses had to be from Garrett. No one else would understand the significance. But why so many? Why now?

“Boss, how do you feel about champagne?”

“Champagne?”

“A
lot
of champagne. Cases of champagne. Are we throwing a party that I didn’t know about? Whoops, here comes a caterer.”

Suddenly Joshua burst out laughing. The message was growing clearer by the minute. Somehow Garrett had finally realized that grand gestures and lavish gifts were only that, an attempt to please, an attempt to deliver a message that couldn’t always be put into words.

“Boss, is this someone’s idea of a joke?” Suzy asked.

“No, hon, I don’t think it’s a joke at all. I think it’s deadly serious.”

“Ohmigod!”

“What now?”

“There’s a woman standing here in a wedding gown. Boss, are you sure you didn’t forget something really, really important?”

“Is she beautiful?”

“Breathtaking,” Suzy confirmed. Her voice dropped. “She looks nervous, though.”

“I can just imagine,” he said with another chuckle.

“What should I tell her?”

“Tell her I’m negotiating a deal and I should be back in the office in an hour.”

“An hour?” Suzy squeaked.

“Not even kamikaze Joe here can fly this jet any faster than that. Don’t let her out of your sight, Suzy. And if there’s not a preacher and a marriage license arranged for this surprise party, get ’em. Pull whatever strings you have to.”

“Should I call Mr. and Mrs. Rivers and tell them to get over here?”

Still grinning, Joshua said, “Something tells me they’ll already be on their way.”

Chapter Sixteen

G
arrett felt like an idiot. From the minute she’d walked through the door to Joshua’s office and had seen what twenty-five dozen roses looked like when amassed in one place, she wondered if she’d gone just the tiniest bit overboard. Mrs. McDonald, however, had urged her to go for broke. Over Garrett’s objections, she had insisted on footing the bill, claiming that she’d foolishly missed out on her own daughter’s wedding and had every right to make up for it with Garrett’s. She’d taken over the arrangements with the logistical expertise of a military commander and the enthusiasm of a mother of the bride. Garrett hadn’t had the heart to slow her down.

Now, though, with cases of champagne being opened and trays of food being displayed on any available surface, all adding to a distinct air of unreality, she wondered if she should have set some limits. The wide-eyed expression on Joshua’s secretary’s face confirmed that nothing quite like this had ever happened in this office before. Not that that was particularly astonishing, she conceded. Weddings didn’t usually take the groom totally by surprise.