JOSS: A Standalone Romance (Gray Wolf Security) (76 page)

“So, I took all the money I could scrap together, and I went to Joan. I told her everything, about Robert and Rebecca, about Robert and Claire, about Martin. Everything. She was the one who suggested we start a business. She said we needed to be able to show everyone that I hadn’t run away, that I was simply going out on my own. And construction was something I’d always been interested in, particularly green construction. So it made sense. And it worked, for a while. My father was none too pleased and my mother…she was heartbroken, but she insisted she understood. Robert assumed it was because of Claire. He tried to reach out a few times, to apologize. He never knew what Martin had threatened, not until I told him two days ago.”

“Why didn’t you tell him?”

Miles shrugged. “Didn’t see the point.”

“And me? What role did I play in this charade?”

Miles lifted his hand, like he was going to touch me, maybe hold my hand. But then he let it fall again, resting on his own thigh.

“It didn’t take long for Martin to find me. He was pissed that I resigned from the family business, removing access to the things he needed: client files, bank account numbers, inside information. But then he saw how well my construction business was going and figured it would be a good cover for his westward expansion. He’d wanted to expand his business for years, sending guys out to Colorado and California to test the waters there. He’d never considered Texas. But when he found me there, he decided there couldn’t be a better setup than a Thorn running an easily corruptible business—at least traditionally. It was part of the reason he’d gotten into construction in the first place. It just stopped being profitable as a front, so he took it legit. But my business could be highly lucrative, especially in a state that shared a border with Mexico. The only thing that would have been better would have been if I’d begun my business in El Paso, but he figured beggars couldn’t be choosers.”

He sat back and crossed his arms over his chest. “I needed an excuse in a hurry. So I told him that I was in the process of getting married and would need a few months to settle in with my new bride. He gave me six months. But I wasn’t even dating anyone at the time. And then you, quite literally, ran into me, and it just seemed to fall into place. I marry this naive girl who would never be the wiser, keep Martin on the ropes until I figured something out, then get out from under it all and go back to my life like none of it ever happened. But then my mom got sick, and I got distracted, and it all fell apart.”

“And Martin came after you again.”

“Yeah.” There was real sorrow when he looked at me then. “He came to my office one afternoon with pictures. Picture of you at your aunts’ house, of you shopping with Lisa, of you visiting your friends at Starbuck’s. He said you were beautiful, and so vulnerable. How easy it would be for one of his men to simply pluck you off the street, make you disappear like you never existed. And that’s when I realized I’d not only
not
found a way to get out from under the pile of shit I’d pulled down on myself, but I’d dragged you into it alongside me. And you had no clue.”

I slid my hand into his. “You should have told me. I would have—”

“What? There wasn’t anything to do. He was very clear about his threat. And I couldn’t let anything happen to you.”

“Is that why you sent me away?”

He squeezed my hand, then stood again, pacing for a minute. “I didn’t know what else to do. I couldn’t let him hurt you. And it seemed to me you were safer far away from me.”

“What about you?”

“I wasn’t in danger. As long as Martin thought he could use me, I was safe.”

“Then how did you get him off your back?”

“I went to the FBI.”

His story sounded like the plot for a bad television crime show.

He went back to Massachusetts and met with an FBI agent. A friend of a friend of Joan’s had arranged the meeting. They put a wire on him and had him arrange a group of meetings with Martin. And Martin apparently never suspected a thing. They met on three different occasions in Waco, each time in public, each time with Martin’s goons hanging around, guns obvious under their jackets, each time with unspoken threats hanging in the air. Martin described in clear detail at each of the meetings what, exactly, he wanted Miles to do with his business, how he was to transact these illegal acts, and who he was to do it with. It couldn’t have gone better if it had been scripted.

The FBI practically jumped for joy after each meeting.

But Martin de Luca wasn’t arrested right away. The FBI had been watching him for a very long time, and they knew that the bulk of his drug trade was now under the control of his son, Dominic. So, they confronted Martin and made a deal with him. Martin, the loving father that he was, jumped at the chance to hang his son.

“They told me it was all taken care of, that Dominic would fall into their trap without complications. He was supposed to be in South America until September. Then they would catch him with cocaine in a shipment of antiques he was supposedly bringing into the United States to donate to a local museum. They swore it was over, that I could go on with my life,” Miles said, his eyes full of regret as he stood against the railing once more and studied the bruises on my face. “He wasn’t supposed to be on the ship.”

“And Robert? Lisa and Colin? Why were they there?”

“Robert and Claire weren’t supposed to be there either. Lisa and Colin I invited because I knew you would appreciate having your best friend around. And you…I went to your aunts and told them I’d made a mistake divorcing you. I told them I still loved you and wanted a chance to reconcile.”

“That’s why they gave me the ticket.”

“They thought it was incredibly romantic.”

He smiled when he said it, a little wistfulness filling his voice. I could imagine. My aunts were nothing if not incurable romantics.

“And the cruise line? Is it really owned by your father’s company?”

“Yes. And it is the maiden voyage of that particular ship after a remodel. But it’s not that big of a deal. We remodel the ships every few years.”

“Then the reporters…?”

“If there were any on board, they were there as passengers.”

I crossed my arms over my chest. “Then, what was the point? Were you trying to draw Dominic out?”

“No. It was nothing like that.”

“Then why?”

“I didn’t know he was on board. I thought he was still in South America. I never would have brought you there had I known. And I definitely would have been more careful if I’d known that you dated him.”

“It was one date. Just one among many.”

“Many? I didn’t realize you’d moved on that quickly.”

Was there hurt in his voice? Was it bad that the thought made my heart do a little jump of joy?

“You kicked me out quite unceremoniously. And then you sent over divorce papers before I was even out of the house a week. What was I supposed to think?”

“I did that for Martin’s sake. I wanted him to see that you didn’t matter to me, so he wouldn’t hurt you.”

“It worked.”

“I never wanted to hurt you, Riley. I was trying to protect you from this mess I’d gotten myself into.”

“You mean the mess Robert got you into.”

Miles shook his head. “It was as much my mess by then as it was Robert’s. More mine. If I hadn’t decided to handle it all on my own, if I had gone to my father to begin with…but I was too headstrong to ask him for help.”

“But you’ve told him since,” I guessed.

“I told him everything. I told him about Rebecca, about Robert’s role in her death, about Claire and how destroyed I was by what she did. I told him about fleeing to Joan, about my deal with you. Everything. I told him everything.”

“And Dominic? I’m guessing the little show at the airport yesterday was orchestrated by the FBI?”

“It was. The FBI and Martin. Dominic will be going to Italian jail for quite a while. And then he’ll be extradited to the United States to face charges there, hopefully to face a lifetime in federal prison alongside his father. He won’t ever bother you again.”

“Then it’s over. You can go back to your life.”

“I can.”

“Good.” I climbed to my feet, trying to pretend that tears weren’t clogging my throat and threatening to stream down my face once again. “I guess it all worked out for the best then.”

“There’s still a few details to hammer out.”

“Yeah? Like what?”

“Like the fact that I’m in love with you. Like the fact that I was planning on winning you over on this cruise and throwing the perfect destination wedding in Tuscany.”

I stood with my back to him, those tears no longer straining against the dam of my emotions, but rolling down my cheeks like a summer storm that could no longer be denied. I rubbed them away, but they were just replaced by so many more.

“I love you, Riley,” he said simply. “I didn’t even realize it until Martin was showing me those pictures. Not until I knew that I could lose you. And when that reality sank in, I knew that it was nothing like the love I thought I felt for Claire.”

“You loved Claire. You were going to marry her.”

“I did,” he said, his voice raw with emotion. “I thought the sun rose and set in Claire. When I married you, when we left on our honeymoon, all I could think about was how I was supposed to do these things with Claire. All I could focus on was that you weren’t the woman I wanted. I stayed away because looking at you was just a reminder of everything my brother stole from me when he took her away.”

I groaned because that pile of photos Dominic had shown me was still too fresh in my mind. Several of those photos were from our honeymoon. He and Claire, in the restaurant downstairs from the suite where I spent those few days alone. All these thoughts were bouncing through my mind again, my mind going places I didn’t want it to go. Images of Claire in his arms, of the two of them sneaking off together, both married to other people, but unable to deny feelings that never really died. It killed me, imagining him pining after her. But he had. I saw it.

“I didn’t know you then,” Miles said, his voice closer than it had been just a minute ago. “I didn’t know how amazing you were. How kind and gentle. I didn’t know how generous your spirit was. I mean, Christ, Riley, the way you were there for me through my mom’s final hours, the way you so completely gave yourself to me and my family even after the way I’d treated you…. I was hurting so deeply, and you opened yourself up. You let me come to you….” His voice shook as he said that last phrase. “You are so much more than I will ever be. I don’t deserve you.”

I rubbed at my face again, wiping away more tears, as even more spilled over the corners of my eyes. I’d cried so much in the last few days, I wasn’t sure I would ever be able to make it stop. My chest ached. I just wanted to go back, to be angry and hurt, but still in control of my life. As badly as I’d wanted Miles to make this confession to me, I wasn’t sure I was ready to hear it. Not now. Not like this.

Almost as if he’d heard my thoughts, Miles lay his hands on my shoulders and said, “I’ve laid a lot on you this morning. I want you take your time, to think about what I’ve said. I don’t want you to feel pressured into making any decisions now. But I want you to know I love you. And I want to be your husband for as long as you want to be my wife. But if that’s not what you want, I still have those divorce papers ready to go to the court. So, either way, it’s your choice.”

I bit my lip, pain slicing through my chest at the mention of the divorce papers. I honestly didn’t know what I wanted. It hurt when he said that. But it all hurt.

I pulled away and went back to the bedroom, curling up alone in the bed we’d shared just last night. It seemed like—regardless of the choice I made—it would still end the same way. If I insisted on finalizing the divorce, I would end up alone. If I stayed with him, I would always wonder about his feelings for Claire. What kind of marriage would that be, spending every holiday with the woman who might or might not be the love of my husband’s life? He said he didn’t love her like he loved me. But how did I know that wasn’t just the trauma of everything that’d happened these last few months? His mother died and he came to my bed for the first time. A man threatened my life and suddenly he loves me? Then I’m kidnapped by the son of his enemy, and now he wants to share the rest of his life with me? Was it just me, or was there a pattern to his affections?

How could I trust that his declarations of love were real? A better question might be, could I live the rest of my life knowing that I was his second choice? Could I love him enough to overcome any weakness there might be in his devotion to me? Would my love for him be enough to keep us together and happy for the rest of our lives?

I wasn’t sure. All I knew was that the thought of leaving him made it impossible for me to catch my breath. And that put me in a very dark, uncomfortable position.

We re-boarded the ship the next day off the coast of Italy. Lisa was waiting at the top of the gang plank and, like some cheesy romance movie, she nearly knocked me off my feet when she rushed to hug me.

“I was so scared when you disappeared,” she moaned against my ear. “I thought I’d never see you again.”

“You should know me better than that. I’d never let anyone keep us apart.”

She laughed even as tears rolled down her cheeks. “Thank God.”

Colin moved up beside Lisa and slid an arm around her waist, the look in his eyes when he glanced at her telling me more than words ever could. If there had been even the shadow of a doubt that his intentions toward her were not honest, they disappeared in that moment.

I hugged her again and whispered against her ear, “I had to come back. I wouldn’t miss being maid of honor at your wedding for anything in the world.”

The smile she flashed me as I stepped away said it all. There would be a wedding very soon.

***

Miles was reluctant to leave me to my own devices, but I managed to sneak away from him the following afternoon. I went to the pool and stretched out in a lounger, determined to get a little sun out of this ill-fated cruise. My aunts would make the worst jokes if they made up the reasons why I didn’t get any sun on this little vacation. And there was nothing worse than fending off dirty jokes from a couple of old spinster women.

I was two chapters in on a new novel when a shadow fell over me and wouldn’t go away. I set it down on my chest and looked up, expecting to find an overzealous waiter or a curious child standing over me. Instead, I found Claire—resplendent in a string bikini—standing in my sunlight.

“I thought you’d never leave your suite.”

“Didn’t realize you were paying that much attention.”

“I’ve been hoping to get a few minutes alone to talk to you.” She took a seat in the lounger next to me, settling a towel and a book—a romance, I was amused to see—beside her before she turned her focus on me once again. “I think I owe you a few explanations.”

“I’m not sure you do.”

“You know that Miles and I were engaged before I married Robert,” she said, as though I hadn’t spoken. “Everyone knows.”

“I suppose they do.”

“It wasn’t something I planned. I’d never cheated on Miles before that.”

I shrugged, lifting my book again. “I think that’s between you and him.”

She took the book from my hands, leaning close, her eyes squinting against the sunlight.

“Miles is a good man. I loved him more than I ever realized when we were together. I regret cheating on him. I regret letting Robert charm me the way he did, and I definitely regret marrying him.”

That was not what I’d expected to hear her say. When she began, I thought it was going to be some lame conversation about how I shouldn’t hurt Miles, or about his behavior while I was missing. But she simply went for the jugular.

“Then why did you? Why would you cheat on him with his own brother?”

“Because he sent me up to that house with Robert, and we were stuck without any form of entertainment.”

“You were bored?”

“Maybe.” She bit her lip, her eyes swimming with tears for an instant. But then she blinked and it was like I had imagined it. “I can’t explain it. Maybe Miles worked too hard and left me to my own devices too much. And Robert paid attention to me. He said all the right things at all the right times. And he was such a gentle lover—is a gentle lover.”

I sat up and grabbed my own towel, intent on leaving. But Claire grabbed my arm.

“I made a mistake. And I knew it from almost the start. But Robert needed me. Miles never needed me. He thought he loved me. And maybe he did. But not like he loves you.”

I focused on her, my eyebrows raised. “What makes you think you know anything about my marriage?”

“Because I know Miles. I lived with the man for nearly two years. You get to know a lot about a person when you do that. And I knew the moment I saw the two of you together for the first time. The way he was touching you, the way he looked at you. He was never like that with me. Not once.”

I shook my head. “You don’t know anything about it.”

“Like the fact that your marriage was an arrangement? That he only married you to get Martin de Luca off his back?” Claire chuckled at what must have been a pretty obvious look of surprise on my face. “I know more than you think I do. I think you’re the one who’s a little oblivious to what’s going on around here.”

“Dominic showed me pictures. You and Miles in Waco and in Florida. The two of you talking in restaurants, at his office, in front of some hotel.”

She nodded. “I went to see him. Many times. Once or twice to ask for money. But mostly to test the waters, to see if there was hope for us. But Miles is an honorable man. Once you said your vows, no matter how many contracts the two of you signed before hand, he was not going to break those vows to you—no matter what I promised him. Hell, even before the wedding, I knew there was no chance. But I had to keep trying.”

“Why?”

She shrugged. “I love him. And I wanted him back. But I hurt him too deeply for there ever to be a chance for us again.”

“No,” I said, studying her face for a long moment. “Why are you telling me all this? Why now? Miles and I have been separated for six months. The only reason I’m on this cruise is because he manipulated my aunts into tricking me to come. Our marriage is a joke. If there was ever a time when Miles might be susceptible to your charms, it’s now. So why tell me? Why aren’t you with him?”

Claire studied my face for a long minute. Then she sighed.

“Because I know it’s too late. I know that whatever he felt for me, it began to die the first time Robert kissed me. And I know that Miles was a mess without you. The thought that Dominic might touch you drove him insane with rage. And it takes a hell of a lot to get Miles to show that sort of emotion. He loves you. And I love him enough to want to see him happy.”

I believed her. There was something about the way she said it, the light that danced in her eyes each time she said his name, that told me more than the words themselves. But there was something else about it that bothered me.

“What about you? Will you always come up behind me and try to distract him? Will you always try to win him back?”

Claire thought about that for a minute, her eyes darkening with emotion.

“Probably.” She handed me my book. “Robert is not the man his brother is. But he is kind and he’s devoted to me. So, maybe someday I’ll learn to be happy with what I have. Or maybe I won’t. But I don’t think I’ll ever stop wanting Miles. But at least we know where we stand with each other. Right?”

“I guess so.” I took her hand and squeezed it lightly. “Thank you for being honest.”

I stood and walked back toward the main deck, my feet shuffling into a little jog and then a run as I took the stairs two at a time and rushed toward our suite. Miles was coming out the door as I arrived, breathless.

“Yes,” I said, a smile that turned into a childish giggle bursting from my lips.

“Yes, what?” he asked, taking hold of my upper arms to steady me.

“Yes to everything. To a real marriage. To love and family and a future. To us.”

His eyes narrowed with confusion for a moment, then widened. “Are you sure?”

“More sure than I’ve ever been of anything else.”

He turned me, pushing me back into the room, his lips on mine before the door was closed. I wrapped my arms around his neck and let him lift me, my head spinning as we fell back onto the bed. He groaned, his body instantly conforming to mine, his hands tugging my hips up against his, my hands burying themselves in his hair, his shirt, wanting him as close as I could possibly get him.

This was where I’d always wanted to be. There was no doubt in my mind that I belonged in Miles’ arms and that he belonged in mine. I just had to know that he had no doubts. It was a little ironic, but Claire’s confession that she would never stop trying to win him back had destroyed all doubt that those pictures had infected me with. Dominic had wanted me to question Miles’ devotion to me. And for a while, it’d worked. But then, with Claire’s confession, the pictures took on a whole new meaning.

He’d had opportunity after opportunity to win Claire back. He could have stolen her from his brother long before he met me. And he could have taken her back on our honeymoon, or on the many occasions she’d come to Waco for that express purpose. But he’d never taken her up on it. Not once. And the proof was in those pictures.

He was everything she’d said he was and more. And I’d known it from the moment we met. It just took time for me to see it.