Judy Moody Around the World in 8 1/2 Days (4 page)

On Saturday morning, Dad agreed to take Judy to Amy Namey’s house. Judy checked to make sure she had on BOTH of her watches. Her purple watch was set to regular time in Virginia. Her red striped watch was set to Italy time. And she wore her mood ring on her thumb so she could have a lucky thumb ring just like Nellie Bly, Daredevil Reporter. “Ciao, Mamma! Ciao, Stink!”

“Why do you keep saying chow?” asked Stink. “Like it’s time to eat or something.”

“Or something! Don’t have a cow, Stink. It’s Italian,” said Judy. “I’m learning words from Italy for our Around-the-World-in-Eight-Days project at school.”

“You mean your Drive-Your-Family-Crazy-in-Eight-Days project, don’t you?” asked Stink. Mom and Dad laughed.

“N-O!” said Judy.

“Does chow mean ‘hello’ or ‘goodbye’?” asked Stink.

“BOTH!” said Judy.

“Weird,” said Stink. “‘Hello’ means ‘goodbye’ in Italy? What a country!”

“Ciao, bambino,” Judy said to Stink.

“Bambino? Isn’t that a baby?” asked Stink. “I am not a baby!”

“Okay, then, ciao, fratellino.”

“What’s that?”

“‘Little brother.’ Wait, no. I’m wrong. Oh, yeah, I remember now. It’s BRATellino!”

“Is not.”

“Ya-huh! I mean, si,” said Judy.

“How come you have on two watches?” asked Stink.

“You know how two heads are better than one?”

“Yeah. And two cuckoo clocks make you twice as cuckoo?”

“No,” said Judy. “Two watches are better than one, too.”

“Oh,” said Stink. “Where are you going, anyway?”

“To Amy Namey’s house.”

“But what about the Toad Pee Club? This morning we race Toady at Fur & Fangs. I might win a tarantula.”

“Buona fortuna,” Judy said.

“What’s tuna fish got to do with anything?” asked Stink.

“Nothing. It means ‘good luck,’” said Judy. “I don’t know how to say ‘bug off’ in Italian.”

“But you’re the one who always says Toady belongs to the whole Toad Pee Club, not just me. So we should all go. Together. That’s what makes it a club.”

“Stink, don’t you get it? I’m in a new club now. And today I’m going to get my own way-official, real-and-true membership card. For sure and absolute positive.”

“What club? Can I be in it? I want a way-official membership card.”

“It’s the My-Name-Is-a-Poem Club, Stink. Sorry. It’s only for people who have a name that rhymes. So unless you changed your name to Stink McFink —”

“I don’t care. I’ll be Stink McFink,” said Stink.

“No way, Stink McNay. No dice, Stink McLice. No go, bratellino.” Judy cracked herself up all the way to the car.

“Ciao!” Judy said to Amy.

“Bonjour!” Amy said to Judy. Amy’s group was doing France for their Around-the-World-in-Eight-Days project. “I like your lucky thumb ring! I have one too.” She held out her hand.

“Same-same!” said Judy.

“Want to see my ABC gum collection?” Amy asked.

“Check!” said Judy.

“C’mon upstairs.” Amy opened a funny-shaped door at the back of her room. It went to a small room under the stairs. “You have to duck or you’ll bump your head,” said Amy.

“Who lives here? Elves?” asked Judy.

“It’s my secret place,” said Amy. She pointed to the wall. Chewed-up gum was stuck all over the wall behind the staircase, where nobody could see.

“WHOA!” said Judy. “You started your own Wall of Gum! Just like the one in California.”

“Shh!” said Amy. “I don’t want my mom to find out.”

Judy pretended to zip her lips. “Zipper Lips!” said Amy, and they cracked up.

“Lipper Zipper!” said Judy, and they cracked up some more.

“Want your membership card?” asked Amy. “I sent away for it.”

Amy handed the card to Judy. It looked way official. And it was signed by Hugh Blue, just like Amy’s.

“Rare!” said Judy. “How did you get yours covered in plastic like that?”

“Tape!” said Amy. They taped up Judy’s card to make it look even more official.

“It also comes with this stuff,” said Amy.

Judy took the stuff out of the bag. There was a HI, MY NAME IS nametag, a My-Name-Is-a-Poem Club bike decal, a list of members with rhyming names from all over the world, and a game called the Name Game.

Judy and Amy played the Name Game. Judy made up rhyming names for Rocky, Frank, and Jessica Finch. She made up eight names for Stink.

“Stink McFink is still the best,” said Judy, laughing.

“Hey, I know,” said Amy. “Let’s write to some real people who rhyme.”

“RARE!” said Judy. She took out her list. “Just think,” she said. “Now my name will be on the list someday. Judy Moody.”

Amy got out a big plastic tub with all kinds of writing paper and smelly markers, colored pencils, stickers, rubber stamps, and glitter-glue pens.

“Blue glue!” said Judy.

“We can make our own postcards,” said Amy. “I can print some out on the computer, even. Then we can send them to other people in the club.”

“Okay,” said Judy. “I’ll send one to Larry Derry Berry, Viola Gazola, Yankee Pankee, and Herman Sherman Berman. Can you believe there’s a person in the club named T. Hee? No lie.”

“T. Hee. That’s funny,” said Amy.

“Tee-hee-hee!” shouted Judy and Amy. They both cracked up.

Amy looked at the list. “I’ll write to Lance France, Roos Van Goos, Pinky Dinky, and Wong Fong from Hong Kong.”

“You made that up,” said Judy.

“Nope. It says so right here!” Judy and Amy fell on the floor, laughing some more.

Judy and Amy made postcards all morning. Judy wrote addresses on all her postcards till her hand almost fell off. “Done!” she said.

“I’m not done yet,” said Amy. “Why don’t you do one more?”

“Okay,” said Judy. “How about Nathaniel Daniel? He’s from the United States. San Luis Obispo, California.”

“Let me see that!” said Amy. She looked at the list. “That’s where Bubblegum Alley is. The real Wall of Gum. No lie.”

“No way!” said Judy. “Let’s send him some gum and see if he’ll stick it on the wall for me. Then we can BOTH be on the Wall of Gum.”

“Okey-dokey!” said Amy.

“Let’s break out the Make-Your-Own-Gum Kit I sent away for,” said Judy. “I’m so glad I brought it. I’ve been dying to try it out. Now we can make our own gum to send him. Will it be okay with your mom?”

“Sure,” said Amy. “As long as we clean up.”

Judy and Amy went downstairs to the kitchen. “Let’s have some lunch first,” said Amy. “Mom left us baloney and cheese sandwiches, but I like to cut them up, like this.” She took out some cookie cutters, and the girls made sandwiches into stars, hearts, footballs, pumpkins, and rabbits. Judy even made one of the United States (except where Florida broke off).

Amy took the plate over to the table. “We’ll never eat all these in a million years,” said Judy.

“They’re way more fun to make than eat,” said Amy, grinning at Judy with a milk mustache.

After lunch, Judy looked at her red watch. She looked at her purple watch. Which was which again? Wearing two watches sure could get a person all mixed-up. But it was still early on BOTH watches.

“Do you have to go?” asked Amy.

“Nope. I have loads of time before I have to go to Rocky’s to practice the tarantella dance,” said Judy. “Let’s turn this puppy loose!” She opened up the Make-Your-Own-Gum box and held up a bag. “This must be the gum base. It’s called chicle. It comes from the rain forest.”

They poured bags of powder stuff and sticky stuff into a bowl. They melted it in the microwave.

“I need the mixing tool,” said Judy.

They took turns mixing and stirring, mixing and stirring. Powder stuff flew in the air and everywhere. Sticky stuff stuck to the spoon and the chair and the table.

“Now for the fun part!” said Judy. They plopped a big sticky blob down onto some wax paper.

“It says to knead it like bread,” said Amy.

“Dive in!” said Judy. They each took a big blob.

“Wait! We better take off all our watches,” said Amy. “It’s so sticky!”

“Icky, yicky, sticky!” said Judy.

“Ooey, gooey, chewy,” said Amy.

Judy pushed back her hair. Judy scratched her nose. Judy dropped some on her knee.

“You have gum all over you!” said Amy.

“So do you,” said Judy. “Double bubble trouble!” They cracked up.

“Now for the best part,” said Judy. “Flavors. They only give you two. Peppermint and Tutti-Frutti.”

“We can make our own,” said Amy.

“Like what?”

Amy looked in the cupboard. “Peanut-butter gum? Tuna-fish gum?”

“I don’t think so!” said Judy.

Amy looked in the spice rack. “How about cinnamon gum? Vanilla gum? Rainbow-sprinkle gum?”

“Sure!” said Judy. “Why not?”

Amy looked in the refrigerator. “Ketchup gum? Mustard gum? Pickle gum?”

“That’s it!” said Judy.

“Ketchup gum? Yick!”

“No!” said Judy. “Pickle gum.” She poured some pickle juice from the jar and kneaded it into one of the blobs. “I can take some home to play a trick on Stink. He’ll never know. I’ll call it Pickle Chicle.”

“A Pickle Chicle trick?” asked Amy.

“Exactly!” said Judy. “A Pickle Chicle trickle!”

They rolled and pressed and squeezed and stretched the gum until it was flat. Then they dusted it with powdered sugar and cut it into pieces.

“Let’s taste some,” said Judy.

“Not the pickle gum, though,” said Amy.

Judy popped one, two, three pieces of gum in her mouth. The gum stuck to her teeth. The gum stuck to her tongue. The gum stuck to the roof of her mouth.

“Is so sicky,” said Judy.

“Sicky?” asked Amy.

“Stick-y!” said Judy. “My mouth feels like a hippo eating a jar of peanut butter!”

Amy popped one, two, three pieces in her mouth. Judy Moody and Amy Namey chewed and cracked and blew and popped gum until Judy’s dad came and it was time to go.

She, Judy Moody, chewed her Peppermint Rainbow-Sprinkle Tutti-Frutti NOT Pickle Chicle gum all the way home.