Read Julia's Chocolates Online
Authors: Cathy Lamb
Six months later
S
ometimes, somehow, real life works out. If only for a few months, a few weeks, a few days, a few moments, life is sweet.
And, that’s how it became for me.
It looked like Aunt Lydia had conquered Roaring Radiation, Creepy Chemo, and Cancer. Stash insisted they have almost no engagement time, so the two were married in his barn. All the Psychic Night women were attendants, and everyone in town received an invitation. Lydia wore a bright purple dress and a red hat. Stash wore a tux. Shawn was the ring bearer, Carrie Lynn the flower girl.
When Jerry finished leading them in their vows, Stash cried, picked Aunt Lydia up, and swung her around. He kissed her, kissed her again, kissed her once more, and Jerry had to break those two up before things got R-rated up there.
Lara and Jerry were back together. Three months earlier, she had had an art show inside the church, and it had been jammed. As she had made something of herself in New York, the state paper did an article on the show, and a lot of people from Portland had come down for it. Every painting sold out. Jerry was the proudest-looking husband I have ever seen. She donated ten percent of the sales to the church.
Lara had made other changes in their lives, which Jerry seemed perfectly happy to accept. During the day she worked on her art. She wore the clothes she wanted to wear and tossed out all her prissy sweaters. One evening a week, she ran choir practice. She made changes there, too. She taught the choir how to rock out. No more of these boring, depressing church hymns. No, Lara picked popular Christian music, recruited townspeople who knew how to play electric guitars and drums and violins and flutes, gave a few people with excellent throat pipes solos, and that church rocked every Sunday. They had to add another service.
The only person who grumbled was Linda Miller. She took her complaints to one women’s group after another in the church, but no one listened to her. Jerry eventually heard about it, told Linda he didn’t think the church was a good fit for her, and suggested she leave.
She was flabbergasted, shocked. More shocked when she told other people what that young uppity minister had told her and the only response she got from them was that they thought she should leave, too.
So Linda Miller left. And soon Lara heard from people at the church in another town what a pain in the ass Linda was and would Jerry and Lara take her back?
Lara had made her peace, and she was finally happy.
Katie lost about forty pounds and had never felt better. She was in love with Scrambler, and he with her. Despite what she’d said earlier about not needing to hear the words “I love you” from a man, she told me she loved hearing Scrambler say it. “It’s like verbal sex to me, Julia.”
Almost as exciting, Katie’s book sold to a major publisher. One of her characters was a real-life abusive, alcoholic jerk who happened to say and do exactly what J.D. used to say and do and who just happened to get shot in the groin by the end of the book and lost both balls.
When the news trucks left and Golden returned to normal, Caroline returned from her family’s island. She told me later that since our last Psychic Night meeting, before Robert had tried to rearrange my face, she had spent a lot of time in the yoga position with burning candles surrounding her, waiting to hear my cry of help. In the process, she had heard the cries for help from hundreds of other people, whose locations she couldn’t ascertain, and whose misery almost sent her over the edge.
But finally my cry for help had penetrated. She told me the cry had been very distant, very faint, but she had recognized my voice and had raced to Aunt Lydia’s house.
She had saved me from being raped, maybe killed.
As Chief Sandstrom was in charge of the criminal proceedings and had no intention of letting his prisoner off at all, justice proceeded quickly, and Robert became a guest of the Oregon State Prison system. I learned later he was a poor prisoner and roomed in an isolation cell for much of the time he was incarcerated.
Not even Mommy and Daddy could buy him out that time.
Dean, Stash, Aunt Lydia, Katie, Scrambler, Caroline, Lara, Jerry, and I ended up spending quite a bit of time with Martin and Shirley Caruthers when they came to visit Caroline after her island break. It was Martin and Shirley Caruthers who Caroline had seen on the cover of the magazine in the supermarket.
It was odd at first to be hanging around with people who landed on the covers of magazines, but we found the Carutherses to be lovely people who adored their daughter but couldn’t figure her out. Both Martin and Shirley had grown up dirt-poor. They met in sixth grade and married when they were eighteen. They didn’t have a dime. But Shirley understood computers, and Martin understood finance, and together they built a company.
They couldn’t understand why their daughter chose a basically penniless life—a life they had worked hard to get away from. Still, they were crazy about her.
The Carutherses hung out in Golden for two weeks. Martin liked helping out Stash on the ranch, and Shirley and Caroline helped me and Aunt Lydia with the chocolates. I tried not to let Shirley read my mind, but one day she said to me, “Don’t worry, Julia. I’m not trying to read your mind. I wouldn’t invade your privacy like that.”
Later, as we mixed ingredients for a batch of Chocolate Nut Bars, she said, “My gift is much easier to bear than Caroline’s is, and my greatest hope is that one day she will be rid of hers. The way she knows that terrible things are going to happen, her inability to stop it, the way she feels people’s anguish, has been horrible for her.” Shirley swiped at her eye.
Aunt Lydia looked at Shirley, her eyes narrowed, then started muttering something about cursing away Caroline’s “gift” to another universe. I knew what we would be doing at our next Psychic Night.
We all played poker together, but at the end of their vacation in Golden, the Carutherses both refused to play with either Aunt Lydia or Stash as those two always won. I asked Shirley why she just didn’t read Stash’s mind.
She looked aghast. “That would be cheating!”
Olivia Cutter took my place at Story Hour, with Roxy Bell as her enthusiastic helper.
At first, I heard, Olivia was stiff. But then Carrie Lynn and Shawn came to visit her every day during a school break, and for some weird reason that seemed to give her confidence. She was soon dressing up as a queen to read fairy tales, as a farmer to read farm stories, and she brought in firefighters and police officers to read firefighting and police stories. She also brought in other guest speakers, one of whom brought reptiles. A snake escaped and couldn’t be located for a week.
Olivia finally found it near the romance novels.
The reptile man, who seemed to be sweet on her, according to Roxy Bell, was invited back on a monthly basis, the whole event having been very exciting.
Olivia was still very involved with Shawn and Carrie Lynn’s lives, coming to their school musical performances, the Open House, and any and all dinners we invited her to. She always brought everyone a book as a gift. Aunt Lydia named a beautiful red bird that she bought at the pet shop “Olivia.”
I adopted Shawn and Carrie Lynn, to their delight and mine. About fifty of us went to the courthouse together and then came home for a party. We tied ribbons around the necks of Alphy, Melissa Lynn, and all the piglets. We decided the chickens, now four hundred strong, looked just dandy without ribbons.
My chocolate business was a success. I ended up renting an older building, hired a bunch of people from town who knew more about running a business than I did, and we were off and running.
The chocolate business had an impact on the rest of the town, too. When we renovated the building, with money from Stash and Dean (which made them partners in the business), we built huge floor-to-ceiling glass windows so tourists could come and watch us make the chocolate, put it in the molds, view the conveyer belts, watch employees wrap the chocolates in the boxes, etc. Soon we had quite a good side business going. The tourists ate at the restaurants in town and spent the night to enjoy other attractions in the area.
As for me and Dean, our wedding is a week from Sunday. As in Aunt Lydia and Stash’s wedding, Shawn is going to be the ring bearer at the wedding and Carrie Lynn the flower girl. Aunt Lydia is the matron of honor, and Caroline, Lara, and Katie are bridesmaids. Three friends of Dean’s will also be in the wedding party, as will Stash.
Katie’s older son, Luke, assured me that for this very special occasion he will wear his three very favorite layers of clothes and his three favorite pieces of underwear which he will show me that day. Logan whispered that he would make sure his Spiderman outfit would be extra special clean for my wedding. Haley decided she would branch out and buy new antennas for her head, this time in pink to match her new pink wedding dress, and Hannah, for once, is going to wear purple instead of black.
I am going to wear red—bright, bold, happy, freeing red. Aunt Lydia is making the wreath I will wear on my head, Caroline is making my jewelry, and Katie and Lara are in charge of the decorations in the church. Lara has promised to paint a picture of me and Dean on our wedding day.
I looked up from my desk in The Chocolate Business, as I called it, as Aunt Lydia burst in. Her hair was about an inch long. She was wearing a bright pink T-shirt that said “I Beat Cancer” on the front and “I Am Damn Happy To Be Alive” on the back. She had one for every day of the week in a different color. Her underwear matched her shirts, and she did not hesitate to show anyone her butt who asked to see the underwear. “I don’t have time anymore to be worried about how my ass looks, thank God.”
“Don’t be late tonight, Julia,” she said to me, raising her fists in the air. “All work and no play will make your vagina dry up and shrivel into nothing. You don’t want that. We all need to keep moist and happy vaginas. Especially with your wedding vows coming up so quick. We must keep the soul of the woman in you healthy and hopeful.”
I nodded sagely, not caring if my employees could hear her loud, booming voice. I adored Aunt Lydia, was grateful for every single second I had with that woman, and she could say anything she damn well pleased at any time, even if she insisted on shouting it over the intercom.
“Did you hear the name of our sacred Psychic Night?” she asked, setting a hip on my desk.
I had named two new chocolate boxes after her. Lydia’s Chickens consisted of chocolates in the shapes of chickens, eggs, roosters, and wine bottles. Lydia’s Life had chocolates in the shapes of pigs, a rainbow bridge with colored icing, toilets with flowers flowing from the top, and a bottle of vodka. They were huge hits.
“No, I haven’t heard yet. What’s the name of the Psychic Night tonight?”
“Loving Your Clitoris!” She did a little twirl. “It’s Loving Your Clitoris Psychic Night. You won’t want to be late!”
JULIA’S CHOCOLATES
CATHY LAMB
ABOUT THIS GUIDE
The suggested questions are intended to
enhance your group’s reading of
Julia’s Chocolates