Just a Couple Ex's Blindsided (7 page)

“Damn, how am I going to do that?” He drummed his fingers on the tabletop. Maybe he should go talk to a shrink too. Or better yet, get his favorite military mindbender Dr. Knox, to come to the house when he confronted Kiki and ended their marriage.

“Axel, I’ve never had anything as nice.”

Axel turned in his chair, looking toward the kitchen entrance. Then he sucked in a breath, immediately standing. Damn ... he had to fight back an instant hard on, and that hadn’t happened to him since he was a teenager.

“I thought you’d look good in that leopard print camisole, Liv, but you're killing it.”

She instantly blushed, smoothing her hand down the Gucci silk pants that only made the expensive print camisole on her sing. “It feels like nothing I’ve ever felt before,” she said, as he walked to her and took her hand.

He lifted her hand and imitated a twirl with his hand — which she followed as he studied her bottom encased in silk, then her breasts covered by the most luxurious leopard print. His heart was pounding. “So worth it,” he muttered, barely able to find his voice.

“Axel.” She smiled at him, looking pleased by his reaction and a little shy.

“I told myself this morning, when I got dressed, that I might as well go out looking good for a day like today,” he said.

She watched his eyes, his mouth, then his eyes, as he dropped her hand but held on. Then she nodded, lifting a tentative hand to the front of his shirt, which she barely touched.

“You're right,” she murmured, then she added, “I’m sorry I got drunk last night ...”

He lifted his finger to her lips, silencing her. “If I bring some wine back here tonight, can I get you to start where we left off?”

A small laugh escaped her. “Okay, I’ll let you get me drunk anytime.” Then her hand bravely flattened on his chest. “Axel, you look hot in this outfit.”

His eyes widened. “Why thank you, ma’am.”

His erection was probably the one in control, when he tugged and she slid into his chest as he dipped his mouth. There had been no plans in his mind to kiss her that morning. But they were kissing within seconds and his hands got to feel Gucci silk over Liv’s curves.

It was probably a good thing several minutes later, when a knock sounded on the front door or they might have made their way back to the bedroom. His mind knew there were reasons he shouldn’t, yet his body and desire were hard to ignore.

“Wow,” Liv whispered as they looked toward the front door.

Axel forced his body away from Liv’s, as he said, “I didn’t get the time to tell you ...” Pounding on the door moved him toward it. “My friend got some evidence.” He paused with his hand on the door knob. “I know I shouldn’t have told you so quick like this.”

Liv shook her head and her tawny hair slid like silk around her shoulders. “I think the kiss is helping,” she murmured, but he didn’t miss her shudder before he pulled the door open.

Liv decided that all of Axel’s military friends were on the rugged side of handsome. She’d seen Jax from a distance and now Ronan who was military buff like all of them and still had the crew-cut. He also had baby blues and a New York accent.

“Ronan Ellis, this is Liv Darwin, she’s the target’s wife.”

Liv inwardly winced a bit at Axel calling her husband “the target.”
That’s what he was though. Wasn’t it?
And, she wasn’t fool enough to think Ronan came bearing good news.

She took Ronan’s hand, shaking it. “Ronan.”

She tried a smile but it felt forced. Axel’s hand warmed her waist from behind and she moved with a barely perceptible motion back into the comfort of his touch. She could still feel his passionate kiss on her lips, as she tried to clear her thoughts, noticing Ronan carried a small digital camcorder.

She stiffened, realizing what must be on it.

“You want coffee?” Axel asked Ronan over her shoulder.

Ronan shook his head. “I’m good, but thanks.”

“Let’s sit at the kitchen table,” Axel said, and his voice sounded tired. It was a stark contrast from moments before they’d opened the door and let Ronan in.

Axel’s hand pressed her back as though to urge her toward a kitchen chair, but she stalled, not moving. “There’s video on that camera,” she stated, then she looked over her shoulder at Axel. His features were tight with obvious stress. “It’s video of them ... together?” she asked.

He nodded solemnly. She quickly looked away, surprised at the burn of tears she had to fight back. Then she scooted from Axel’s hand at the small of her back. “I’m not going to look at that proof.”

She walked out of the kitchen without further explanation. She made it halfway down the hallway before Axel’s hand curled over her waist, stopping her. She wiped at her tears and turned to press her back into the wall, dislodging Axel’s hold, as she looked to the side of him.

“Liv ...” he started to say.

“Don’t tell me ...” she interrupted him. “That I need to see that video to prove it.”

She heard him sighing heavily and she saw his hand on the wall beside her, so she knew he was leaning over her.

“I’ll look at it for both of us,” Axel said.

“No,” she exclaimed, grabbing his shirt to hold him from turning away. She finally looked up at him. “That’s not fair. I didn’t leave so you would do it.” She paused, searching his features and seeing the pain. “I don't think either of us needs to watch it,” she whispered.

His hand came down from the wall and cupped her face with his thumb brushing at the tears drying on her cheek. He shook his head and she gripped his shirt tighter.

“Why?” she demanded. “If Ronan says there is evidence, we don’t need to see it.”

“I just need to see it,” he admitted softly. “I understand if you don’t.”

It felt as if a chasm was opening up between them. She knew it was unreasonable, but before they were becoming a team; us against them. They were together. Now they were splitting ... and it hurt. So she couldn’t see any good would come from seeing the video. It would only tear agony through both of them.

She wanted to tell him she thought he was making a mistake, but she realized she didn’t even know him well enough to offer such advice. And here she’d been kissing him as though they did know each other.

She moved away from his hand cupping her face. “I need to go anyways.”

He looked curious for a moment, as though he’d missed something, then he said, “I’ve got to talk to you about a few things. I’ll tell Ronan to cool it for a few minutes.”

She couldn’t imagine what he had to talk to her about, but she didn’t want to talk. She wanted to flee away from that video and any actions it would bring. “I would feel bad making him wait. Can’t you just call me later and we can talk on the phone.”

She started to scoot toward the bedroom she’d used last night.

“No, Liv,” he said. “It has to be now.” She raised her eyebrows at his firmness. “Come on into the living room for a minute, it won't take long.”

Reluctantly, Liv changed directions and followed Axel, who stopped to tell Ronan to wait. Once in the living room she sat in a chair so Axel had no choice but to sit away from her. He chose the couch and the morning sunlight outlined his muscular shoulders and threw light onto the black edges of his short cropped hair.

He cleared his throat, leaning toward her. “I just wanted to talk about what we do from here on. Make some plans.”

Her eyebrows scrunched. “I won’t come back here, Axel. I’ll get the farmhouse ready and ...”

“No,” he said, quickly. “Liv, that’s not what I meant.” He shook his head. “Of course you’ll come back here. I’ll get you a key.”

She started to say “no,” but he continued, “I meant plan what to do about our spouses. When should we confront them or should we wait.”

Whatever she was thinking flew from her thoughts. “I haven’t thought about when,” she muttered. “But why would we wait?”

“Well for you, definitely it would put you in a better position. I wouldn’t let on to your husband that you know, but first hire a lawyer and seek his advice.”

The first thing that popped into her head was ... “I’m not going back there and live with him. I couldn’t do that. Are you going back to your wife ... to pretend, while you see a lawyer?”

Axel looked as if he wanted to come to her but he stayed in place. “No, Liv.” He shook his head. “I can’t live with her, but I’m not telling her I know either. I’m thinking I might blow up some argument as an excuse to stay away, until I have everything thought through.”

She was surprised at how wise he was. She probably would have gone tearing to her husband to accuse him. “Okay, Axel, I think you’re right. Thanks for making me listen.” She offered him a small smile.

“And you are coming back here to stay?” He watched her like a hawk. “Please,” he added quietly.

She tilted her head. “It's so unusual.”

He smiled, and her heartbeat fluttered. “I don’t think offering each other support is that unusual. Who better to understand?”

She nodded.

“Great,” he said.

Liv pursed her lips. She’d been nodding to the part, “who better to understand.” She’d not been nodding her agreement.

“One more question,” he said. “Do you think your husband could become violent?”

Once again she completely forgot what she’d been thinking about. “I, ah,” she stuttered. Was Andrew violent? He had gotten so mad at her one time, he’d shoved her. Another time he’d trapped her in the bathroom, yelling at her, when she’d wanted to go. He did have a temper, and if he thought his money was at stake, she imagined he could get furious.

“Baby, I see you are not sure.”

The feelings Axel invoked, calling her “baby,” nearly made her cry. But it warred with what she’d been thinking.

“I don’t think he would, Axel, but you are right, I’m not sure.”

Axel nodded, looking grave, and not at all like he’d realized he’d called her an endearment. “Well, we need to keep that in mind when you make the plan on how to confront him with the affair.”

“How about you? Will you confront her right away?” She leaned toward him, now wishing she had sat closer.

There was some bitterness and anger shading Axel’s brown eyes as he shook his head. “No, I’d never try to confront her without the proof so air tight she couldn’t wiggle.” He sighed. “She has a way of turning blame on everyone else.”

Liv nodded, but she really didn’t understand, she just wanted to offer support. “You’ll do the best thing, Axel, thinking this all through.”

A
fter their talk, Liv left Axel with Ronan, while she drove to the rose farm. Was she being a total coward not wanting to see that video? She gripped the steering wheel harder.

“Maybe I am,” she muttered, pulling into the driveway of the rose farm. She was going to tell her employees that she’d be gone for a while and they needed to take over for her. It was the slow season and she didn’t feel too guilty taking the time off so she could sort through her life.

Axel was right, she needed to plan better and she was going to start right away. Once she had the rose farm affairs straighten out with Carlos and Fran, who were happy to keep things on track, she dashed to her house. She didn’t want to take any chances of seeing Andrew and he never arrived home before the afternoon. On the way to her house, she broke the law talking on her cell phone to set up an appointment to see a lawyer that Ronan had recommended.

After she hung up she wondered if Axel would be using the same man. She gazed unseeing up at her house as she pulled in the driveway. Kiki and Andrew might never know she and Axel were using the same lawyer. They might never know they were together in this. Somehow those thoughts made her feel better. Kind of like ...

“Take that!” she snapped. “They deserve it, and Axel and I will be stronger because of it.”

She could feel it, every time she started to slump into despair, she thought of him. Axel was there with her ... she wasn’t alone. Andrew wasn’t getting the upper hand this time. Any guilt she felt about getting too close to Axel, too fast, was tiny compared to the betrayal and bitterness she felt over Andrew cheating on their marriage.

She’d never considered being close to another man before the infidelity. She was faithful and planned to be her entire marriage. Happy or not, bumps in the marriage road or not, she’d planned to stay wedded to Andrew until death.

Or maybe she’d just been stubbornly denying how much she wanted out. Out of Andrew’s constant indifference, out of his separateness pushing her to the side, and out of his bed.

Liv clasped a hand over her mouth in surprise — as if she’d spoken the words aloud, and hadn’t just thought them. She cringed, shaking her head. But it
was
true. Guilt swept through her. Maybe it was her fault Andrew didn’t want to have sex with her? If she’d dressed fancier and tried to be more sophisticated with country club style, maybe then Andrew would have found her attractive? He’d have at least tried to romance her as if he cared.

Tears burned her eyes. The last time they’d had sex it had lasted less than ten minutes, and then Andrew had rolled out of bed without kissing her, to go golfing.

Liv dropped her hand to her side. “But I
let
him.” She’d not stopped him or tried to make it better between them or make it more intimate. She’d just let him go ...
glad
it was over so quickly.

Pictures flashed through her mind of Andrew kissing Kiki; of Andrew pressing Kiki over the hood of his car. So passionately.

She banged the steering wheel. “Maybe if that’s how he acted with me, then I’d want him!”

No, she wasn’t going to take all the blame for this — she wasn’t going to think she could have done better. It took two people to make a marriage work.

Determined to stop wallowing, she wiped away her tears and climbed out of her car. She was going to pack and leave Andrew a note saying that she needed some space to think, because she was unhappy with their marriage. The sad truth was she knew Andrew wouldn’t even come looking for her or become upset and demand she come back home. She knew he’d go straight to Kiki, thinking how lucky he was getting time away from his wife.