Read Just a Little Hope Online
Authors: Amy J. Norris
Just a Little Hope (10 page)
When Tori opened the front door, she noticed all of the lights had been turned off in the den except for a floor lamp situated next to the recliner. A sigh slipped out as she locked the door and leaned against the cool wood.
Her heart still raced at the thought of Carter's lips on hers. She crossed her arms over her chest and could almost feel the warmth of his hands on her arms. The light scent of his aftershave had transferred to her blouse, and she inhaled the aroma.
After a few minutes, Tori pushed off the door, slipped off her shoes and tiptoed across the living room barefoot. Upon entering the bedroom suite she and Pax shared, she saw the light from the en suite bathroom shining onto the king-sized bed. Although Pax was under the covers, Tori could see she was still awake.
“Tori?”
“Hey, Pax. I didn't know you all had decided to go to bed.”
“Yes. We were all pretty tired. Seb and I are going to go out to brunch with his folks tomorrow. Are you going to be okay here on your own? You're welcome to join us if you like, but I didn't know what time Carter might be coming.”
“No, no. I'll be fine. Carter's probably coming around ten in the morning, so I'll just hang around here until then. I might take a dip in the pool if everyone else is going to be gone.”
“That sounds nice. You okay? You look a little⦠shell-shocked. Did something happen with Carter?”
Tori walked toward the bed and sat down, one leg hanging off the side.
“Pax, when you started dating Seb, you knew he'd beenâ¦, on a lot of dates and stuff, I mean he had a reputation for it at least.”
“Yes. He was definitely more experienced than I was. His experience was initially some of our trouble. Seb wanted more than I could give him. I had to tell him to back off a couple of times. Eventually, he learned how far he could go. Of course, now he would never do anything to make me uncomfortable.”
“That's what I thought. With Carter, he's just so⦠good. I mean he'd never try anything. And it's great. But tonight, I think if we had been anywhere else, well, it would have been hard to stop. I've never in my life been more attracted to anyone like I am to him.”
Pax eased herself up to where she was leaning against the headboard. “I think, sometimes, when we know we are interested in someone who has a strong faith in God, we assume the issues of desire won't be a problem. That's not true. God made us to be attracted to the opposite sex, no matter if we are believers in Him or not. The issue comes in -- how do you handle it. What happened tonight?”
Tori smoothed her fingers over the bedspread and tried to gather her thoughts. “Well, he kissed me and then, that was it. But I could tell he was struggling. I know I didn't help matters any. But he finally stopped and walked away.”
“Good. And you've learned how far you can go before things drift somewhere they don't need to go. But here's my advice, Tori. Pray about it. Pray for God to help you control your feelings. It's hard, but finding more appropriate ways to show each other you care, will lend itself to a deeper relationship. But just keep praying. And you know what? I bet Carter is driving home doing the exact same thing.”
****
Dear Lord, I about got myself in over my head there. Help me keep better control next time. I can tell this is going to be a struggle for us both. Give us the strength to make the right decisions.
Carter's prayers continued as he drove back into the city toward his hotel. This was one time his lack of dating much in high school was coming back to bite him. Not that he would want to have dated more, but he'd never fought with himself over feelings like this with any other girl. Sure, every guy longed to be with someone in a more physical sense, but there was something about Tori that about sent him over the edge.
He picked up his cell phone and punched in the numbers to someone he knew could help.
“Hey, Carter, what's happening?”
“I didn't wake you did I, Seb?”
“Naw, man. I was just talking to my dad some, but we'd just said good night. What's going on?”
“I feel stupid talking to you about this, but I figured if anyone could help, it would be you.”
“Whoa, Carter. What's going on?”
“I'm just going to come right out and ask. How in the world do you control yourself around Pax? I'm dealing with some stuff that's never been a big issue before.”
“Oh. I get it. It's tough. It really is. When Pax and I first started going out, I was careful with how I handled her. I knew she had a strong faith, but in my naiveté, I didn't fully understand how much her until I kissed her the first time. I was pretty shocked at how she reacted because, you know what, with the life we lead and the girls we meet, women generally can't wait to get physical. Pax was completely opposite of those girls.”
“Yeah. I know what you mean.”
“Well, the first time, I just blew it off and didn't think too much about it. The second time, we got into a pretty big argument, and I walked out the door. It was that heated.”
“I never knew about your argument. What happened to bring you back together?”
“My kids. That same night I found out my kids were gone. There was only one person I could think of to turn to, and it was Pax. I went back upstairs, and well, I don't remember a whole lot about the next few days. But I do remember just having her with me was enough. I didn't need to be physical to enjoy her company. I just wanted her in my life. It doesn't mean I didn't have constant battles within myself. But the more I got to know Pax, and then God, I realized what was best for both of us. Does any of this make sense?”
“Yeah, man. I understand. I mean, I think I knew all that already, but I guess I just needed to hear it again. Thanks, Seb.”
“Anytime, Carter. Call me whenever you need to, and keep praying. If I know you like I think I do, you've been doing a lot of talking to the Man upstairs anyway. But keep it up. It'll help more than you know.”
Tori laughed as Carter fumbled with the camera on his cell phone. “Really, Carter. Have you used one of those before?”
“Yes. Once or twice. Just gimme me a minute.”
Tori held her position underneath the famous Rodeo Drive street sign as passersby glanced in her direction and smiled. “Yes. I shop. I love to shop, and I believe I could possibly be in heaven.” She muttered under her breath.
Carter looked up from the camera, eyes narrowed. “What?”
Grinning, Tori waved and chuckled. “Nothing. You think you've got it figured out?”
“Yeah. Hang on⦔ His attention returned to looking through the lens.
Tori gave what she hoped was her best pose as she pointed to the sign above her and smiled. Carter grinned, so it must have turned out half-decent, or he was just being nice.
I better check the picture. Knowing him he IS just being nice.
“Can I see?”
“Sure” Carter held out the phone and when her fingers grazed his, fire shot through her body. Oh my. Apparently, she was going to need to do a lot more praying. The attraction for him hadn't dissipated any since the night before.
Turning the phone on, she pressed the camera app and checked out the photo. “Yea! It looks good. Thank you! Now, come over here, and let's try and get one together.”
She saw him grimace at the thought and laughed. “Come on. Please?”
His shoulders slumped. “Okay. Just one photo though.”
Carter walked over and put his arm around her as she held up her phone, and using the reverse camera toggle, tried to get them both in the screen. “Hang on. I think I've got it.”
Right when she went to push the button, Carter leaned down to kiss her on the cheek, making her jump. When she checked, the resulting photo was nothing more than a blur of the sidewalk below and the toe of her right shoe.
“Um. I don't think this is exactly what I had in mind.”
He pulled her hand over to see the image and laughed. “I think it's awesome!”
Nudging him with her shoulder she grumbled. “Men!”
“So, let's head to the beach okay?”
Bending over to pick up her purse, which had fallen off her shoulder in the last photo foray, she laughed. “I am beginning to think you've never seen the beach before.”
Carter's face told her she was right.
“Wait, you haven't been to the beach before? I mean this isn't your first trip to California, right? This
is
your first trip to California! Of course, you're from Oklahoma. There's no beach there.”
“Tori, it's not that big a deal. We can do something else if you want.”
“No. Oh, I feel like such an idiot. Of course we can go to the beach. I've never been to California either, but my family spent lots of time in Florida. I guess it spoiled me for beach activities for a while. Let's go right now. Sand, sun, more sand⦠in my shoes, in the car, but sand, lots of sand. It'll be fun!”
She half-dragged him back to the SUV and waited impatiently for him to get her door open. How awful could she be to bring him to Rodeo Drive of all places when he'd never even been to California before either? Tori felt like an inconsiderate louse.
She reached over and unlocked his car door for him before he could get to it. Seeing her actions, he shook his head and smiled. “Really. If you want to do something else just tell me.”
“Oh no! We're going to the beach. You are going to play in the sand and you're gonna like it!”
“Well, if you are sure then. Seb told me about a beach not far from his place. We'll go there if you like.”
“Sounds wonderful! Drive on!”
The trip didn't take too long, and shortly they were walking along the sandy beaches enjoying the sunshine hand-in-hand. Tori was so glad she'd thought to pack a light scarf to keep her hair at bay as they dealt with the winds off the water.
“So, about last nightâ”
“That sounds like the title of a movie.”
“Tori, I'm being serious here.”
“Okay.”
“I want to apologize again for how I acted. I never want to put you in a compromising situation. I don't want it for myself either, but let's just agree to be careful from now on, okay?”
Tori stopped and faced him. The gentle breeze created by the waves tousled his hair, so she reached up to push the strands off his forehead.
“I agree. I hope it's okay, but I talked to Pax about things last night. I knew she could understand what we were going through.”
Carter squeezed her hand. “It's fine, because I called Seb and talked to him about it, too. We're blessed to have them as friends.”
He pulled her into his arms and gave her a tight squeeze before releasing her. Carter turned them both to continue down the beach, his arm around her shoulders.
Tori put her hand over her eyes to shield them from the sun. “Speaking of Seb, that looks like him up ahead. Is that Pax?”
A little ways down the beach, two people who looked a lot like their good friends were seated on a quilt spread out over the sand.
“I think you're right. It is them. Shall we go say hello?”
Before Tori could answer, she saw Seb get up from the quilt and turn and face Pax. Then in the next moment, he was down on one knee, pulling something from his pocket.
She put a hand on Carter's shoulder to prevent him from walking toward their friends. “Um, I think saying hello is the exact thing we shouldn't do right now.”
Carter stopped in his tracks. “Whoa. So that's what he meant last night.”
Tori spun toward Carter and grabbed him by the arm. “Do you mean you knew this was going to happen? Is this why you wanted to come to the beach?”
“No! I mean, now things kinda make sense, but I promise I had no idea.”
She placed a finger to her lips and crouched down.“Shh. Should we try and creep closer?”
“Do you actually want to infringe on this moment?”
“Um, yes. But no. But, oh I am dying to know what he's saying!”
She and Carter both froze when they saw Pax press both hands to her face and then nod emphatically before Seb placed a ring on her finger. Then he pulled her in for a kiss and a hug.
“I think she said yes.”
Tori punched Carter in the arm. “Of course she said yes. Like there was any doubt she wouldn't.”
The young couple remained still on the beach as they watched their friends rejoice in their engagement not knowing they were being watched.
“We should give them some privacy.”
Tori reluctantly agreed. “And we can't tell them we were here. Not until after they share the good news. Pax would be heartbroken otherwise.”
Carter nodded in agreement, and they slowly crept backwards away from the happy couple.
“How amazing! I'm so glad you'd never been to the beach and wanted to come!”
“Well, about that. I have a little confession. I might have led you to believe I'd never been to the beach before. But that might not have been correct.”
Tori stopped walking and forced Carter to face her. “What are you saying, Carter Manning?”
“Well, I just didn't want to go shopping and I knew that was what you were going to suggest so I just let you believe I'd never been to the beach. But think about it, I go to Spring Training near Fort Lauderdale. There ain't nothing but beaches around there.”
“Oh you â you â I don't even know what to say. But you know what? I'll forgive you this time. Because what we just witnessed makes up for that and more. But next time, buddy? You better have your running shoes handy. I'm faster than I look.”
“Oh, really?” Carter snatched the scarf out of her hair and took off down the beach. “Catch me⦠if you can!”
“Carter Manning. You are going to be the death of me!”
Tori started after him as fast as her feet could carry her.