Just Beginning (8 page)

“It’s vacant, so you wouldn’t have to wait for the owners to move out, but getting a builder and permits immediately would be challenging. Winter seems ambitious.”

“Not if you know the right people and are willing to pay. Still, it’s a lot of work.”

“Yeah. But look at that view.” Jenny sighed and pivoted toward the lake. “And it’s close enough to the hospital and your office. I like it.”

Gabe wrapped his arms around Jenny, back to chest, and rested his chin on her head. “You do?”

She tilted back until she leaned flush against him. “Yup.”

“Enough to help me remodel it?”

“Sure.” It’d be a fun project.

Lulled into a lazy, satisfied complacency, she stared at the lake. The calm water gently lapped at the concrete retaining wall. Miles away, a huge gray freighter, flying a flag Jenny couldn’t quite make out, lumbered by, not even coming close to obscuring their view of Canada.

It must be wonderful to watch the sunrise each morning from here
.

“Enough to share it with me?”

Jenny turned to the side, craning in his arms to look at his face. “You want to live together?”

Gabe’s hands slid down her arms and turned her to face him. Taking her hands in his, he threaded his fingers through hers. “I want to marry you.”

“Marry?” As in, get married? As in wedding? As in husband and wife, marry?

He nodded. “We’re good together—great together. And you make me happy. You’re so...” He frowned, struggling to find the right words, “passionate and sincere.” Pausing, his eyes locked onto hers. “I love you, Jenny. Will you marry me?”

Jenny’s heart lifted, and her breathing slowed. He loved her. The thought both thrilled and humbled her. Wow. Gabe wanted to marry her. “But we’ve only been together four months.”

“I knew after four days—after our first date. This just feels right. We’re right. I know you feel it too.”

She nodded. She did feel it. She felt good, strong, and complete when she was with Gabe. Jenny enjoyed every moment they spent together, but she’d never really thought about marriage.

Jenny Harrison? It sounded good. It sounded great. As Jenny Harrison, she could forget her screwed-up past and begin anew. As Gabe’s wife, and Alex and Ted’s stepmother, she could wipe the slate clean. Marriage to this wonderful, sexy man would allow her to put those haunting mistakes to rest and become reborn, a completely new and better person. She could do it. She could.

Tell him. Tell him now
, an inner voice urged.
He wants to marry you—he has a right to know. It’ll be okay; he loves you. He believes in unconditional love
, the voice reminded.

Jenny’s hands suddenly felt cold in his larger, warmer ones. Her gaze dropped to scrutinize his shirt button, peeking out from beneath the protection of his skewed silk tie. Unconditional love—for his children.

She bit her lip, knowing that the love from a parent to a child was far different than this. Gabe had loved his children for eighteen years. They were a part of him—flesh of his flesh. Would he be so forgiving with a love he’d only had for mere months? She wanted to believe so.

Besides, he respected and loved her honesty. How could she tell him she lived a lie? She couldn’t. She couldn’t bear to see regret and disillusionment cloud his eyes. He may still love her, but she couldn’t take that risk.

She’d always had to earn love, and she was willing to work for Gabe’s. But if he knew about her past, she’d never have a chance. She’d lose his respect for sure, and she couldn’t live with that loss—another loss.

“Jenny?” he prompted. “Don’t fall all over yourself accepting. I’m not sure my ego could take it.”

Conscience prodding her, Jenny pulled out of his embrace. She couldn’t believe she was going to blow this, but she had to be fair—for his sake. Avoiding his earnest gaze, she looked down and wrapped taut arms over her nervous stomach.

“Umm... I... I haven’t made very good decisions in the past.” She frowned and looked away.

“I’ve made a few bad calls, too. Who hasn’t?”

“I don’t trust my instincts anymore.”

“Then trust mine.” Gabe moved closer until she could feel the heat from his body and smell his sexy cologne. He hooked a gentle finger beneath Jenny’s chin, lifting it until she met his warm gaze. “My instincts say you should marry me and we’ll be crazy happy together.”

Jenny closed her eyes and pulled away. “But what if we’re not? What if I screw it up?” That was what she did. Jenny was a master at getting herself in trouble, and after all Gabe had been through, she couldn’t stand the thought of disappointing him. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“You won’t. You couldn’t.”

Jenny’s eyes popped open, and she cocked her head.
Oh, don’t challenge me that way
.
If only you knew
.

But it wasn’t a challenge. His unwavering stare spoke of confidence and sincerity. He had that much faith. He believed in her, in them. This wasn’t some spontaneous suggestion blurted out; Gabe seriously wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. Her stomach quivered in excitement that he loved her that much.

“Trust me.” He took her cold hands and warmed them between his. “Do I make you happy?”

“Yes.”

He paused, searching her face. “Do you love me?”

She swallowed hard.
With all my heart
. “Yes.”

His face lightened, but still he didn’t smile. He squeezed her hands. “Then marry me.”

Could it really be that simple?
He makes me happy. I love him
.
He loves me
. Of course he made her happy, happier than she’d ever been. And she loved him more than anything. He believed in her. He completed her in a way no other could. In such a short time, he’d become so very important to her that she couldn’t imagine life without him. But could it really be that simple?

Frightened to say the words aloud as if she’d jinx them if she did, Jenny looked at him and nodded.

“Yes?” Widening eyes matched his emerging smile.

She nodded again, grinning.

“You’re sure? You’re not just marrying me for this fancy house on the lake and my car?”

Her credit card balance and rent money problem flashed to mind, but Jenny promptly pushed those worries away. She’d get that waitress job and wouldn’t spend a cent until she’d paid off all her debts. She loved this man, and she was going to marry him.

Jenny shook her head and threw her arms around his neck. “Your body. I’m marrying you for your sexy body.”

* * *

Mary Campbell stood in their family room. With her arms tightly wound around her stomach, she leveled a flat stare at Jenny. “Are you pregnant?”

“Mary,” her father put a warning hand on her shoulder.

“What?” Surely Jenny hadn’t heard right. “
No
, I’m not pregnant.” Bewilderment turned to anger, and Jenny came off the couch to face her mother. “Why? You think the only way I could get a man like Gabe is by trapping him?”

“You’ve only known each other a few weeks, and he
is
quite a bit older than you,” her mother said.

“Surprise, Mom.” Jenny glared through narrow, hurt-filled eyes. “He loves me.”

They’d been together more than a
few
weeks
—long enough to know this wasn’t puppy love. She and Gabe were old enough to know their minds. Jenny didn’t understand her mom’s reaction. Gabe was a good, honest man, not like her immature first love, Danny Sullivan. Most mothers would be thrilled their daughter was marrying a doctor. Why couldn’t she be happy for them?

“How well does he know you, Jennifer?” her mother asked with a pointed look.

Gabe stood and put a reassuring arm around Jenny’s shoulder. “Mrs. Campbell, I know this seems a bit sudden, but we’ve been dating for months, and I love your daughter very much. I’m fourteen years older than Jenny, but that’s not an issue for either of us. I’m sorry if you have a problem with it.”

“Fourteen years is a long time, Dr. Harrison—almost middle-aged.”

“Forty is hardly middle-aged, Mom,” Jenny protested. “Not anymore.”

“Please, call me Gabe. Jenny and I love each other, and we’re getting married. We’re not asking permission, we’re inviting you to share our happiness.” He paused, “Naturally, we’d like your blessing.”

“Yesss,” Michael hissed from the doorway. Mom’s instant glare wiped the smile from his face. He settled into a recliner and pulled out his iPod, pretending to play a game.

Her mother returned her attention to them. “This is so sudden. What’s the hurry?”

“No hurry. There’s just no reason to wait.” Gabe slipped a hand under Jenny’s hair to massage her tense neck muscles.

The warm, intimate look he gave Jenny both curled her toes and lifted her heart. This was right. The most right thing she’d ever done. Jenny looked at her parents and raised an impish eyebrow. “Would you rather we moved in together and lived in sin?”

“Maybe.”

“Really?” Jenny searched her mom’s face trying to discern if she was serious or just testing her. Why in the world would her conservative, Catholic mom prefer that they live together without being married? She was condoning premarital sex? That went against everything her mom believed in.

“If that’s what it takes. You’ve always been impulsive, and it usually gets you into trouble.” She faced Jenny. “Have you
really
thought everything through? Marriage is a huge commitment.”

Her father thrust his hands deep in his pockets and raised a dark eyebrow at Gabe. “What about children? You’d be in your sixties when your children graduate college.”

“We’re not going to have any,” Jenny blurted out.

Gabe stiffened at her side.

They’d never talked about children, but Jenny didn’t want to admit they’d overlooked this important issue, confirming Mom’s belief that they were rushing things. Besides marriage, step parenting and jump-starting her career would fill her life; Jenny couldn’t imagine children on top of that.

“I have a daughter and son from my first marriage,” Gabe admitted. “If Jenny doesn't want children, that's fine with me. Even if we change our minds, we’ll figure it out; just like you did when Michael came along. Mr. Campbell, I love your daughter and will do my best to make her happy.”

Jenny took Gabe’s arm and snuggled close, needing his warmth and strength against her father’s concern and her mother’s doubts.

Dad stared at them ten long seconds before smiling broadly. “It seems the feeling’s reciprocated.” Her father held out his hand. “But I’d have a hard time with ‘Dad’, call me Mike. Welcome to the family.”

Her mother’s lips tightened to a thin line as she stared hard at her husband, sending him a silent, disapproving message.

“Let it go, Mary.” He smiled at Jenny. “Look how happy she is.”

Mom stared at them one long, considering minute. Concern flickered across her face. “It’s just so sudden. I’m worried you haven’t had enough time to really get to know each other. Marriage is
hard
and you have to have a solid foundation to weather the challenges all married couples face—the irritating habits, career stress, disagreements over raising children.” She glanced at Michael. “Unplanned pregnancies, money problems... Speaking of money, does Gabe know about your debt, Jennifer?”

With a sinking stomach, Jenny couldn’t prevent a peek at her father. How’d she find out? Dad promised not to tell Mom about the loan. Jenny couldn’t bear disappointing her mother again, but when Dad offered the short-term loan, she hadn’t been able to turn it down either. Attempting to salvage Jenny’s pride, Dad suggested they keep it between the two of them.

Her father frowned at her mother. “What’re you talking about, Mary?”

“I’m talking about your
little loan
and how Jenny can’t pay her bills.” She frowned, hurt and betrayal stamped all over her stubborn Irish face.

Damn
. Jenny shook her head. This was exactly what she hadn’t wanted. She should have told Mom about the loan. Now not only was Mom disappointed that Jenny’d failed again, but she felt excluded and hurt, thinking they were hiding things from her—which they were.

“So Jenny had a little cash flow problem this month. It’s no big deal.”

“And the month before that, and the four months before that?” Her mother raised her eyebrows.

It’d been a long time since Jenny’d been at the center of a parental argument, and the guilt and the sick feeling in her stomach didn’t feel any better now than it had then. Worse, Gabe and Michael were witnessing it, and she didn’t know how to stop it.

Jenny bent her head, unable to look at Gabe. She wished for a magic mirror to step into another world—any other world would make more sense than this and be far less embarrassing. She was afraid to even think of what Gabe was making of all this.

“I know about Jenny’s financial situation, and we’ll be taking care of it right away,” Gabe said. “So there’s no problem.”

Jenny turned astonished eyes to Gabe, who squeezed her shoulder a little harder than reassurance warranted. When she began to protest, the pressure on her shoulder increased until she closed her lips.

“See, Mary.” Her father beamed. “Everything’s taken care of.”

Indecision replaced the hurt in her mother’s eyes. Jenny silently prayed Mom would take the opportunity to let the past rest, but her optimism died when her mother turned steady eyes to her. Her freckles stood out in her pale face with the weight of her decision. “I hope you’ll be very happy together.”

Jenny deflated; not exactly the endorsement she’d been hoping for, but she’d take it.

Her father put an encouraging arm around her. “I’ve got a bottle of Moet & Chandon chilling for a special occasion, and I think this definitely qualifies.”

Jenny summoned a smile and returned her father’s hug.

Dad poured champagne for the adults and ginger ale for Michael. He proposed a simple, eloquent toast and they clicked glasses, yet her mother didn’t smile once. She brought the crystal flute to her lips but barely sipped the sparkling wine.

Turning to her fiancé, Jenny smiled and finished her champagne in two quick swallows. “Thanks for the champagne, but we’ve really gotta run. Gabe’s got to get back to the hospital, and I’ve got to work.”