Just Can't Let Go (21 page)

CHAPTER 40

Alexis

I
was done with all dicks.

I prayed my baby wasn't a boy. Last night was the loneliest I remembered. The one person I believed would always be there for me hadn't returned any of my calls. Spencer was jealous. His mom left him everything. Our dad willed all of his possessions to me. I didn't see what the problem was long as we made certain our uncle didn't inherit shit. I was down with that.

I'd witness Spencer ignore my mom's texts and calls when I was with him at T.I.'s Scales 925. Maybe being his sister didn't make me special because he first saw me as a piece of ass the way most men did.

My mom might be right. It made me question the sincerity of Conner's trust. What was the point of all the stipulations? I wondered if the trust was valid. Did our dad give me this to retaliate for Spencer's refusing to bond with him? I kind of saw him, although I promised my brother I wouldn't. I didn't dislike Conner as much as I'd pretended. I'd never understand why he'd put his brother in the trust knowing his brother had molested Spencer? Maybe he didn't have any other living relatives. I wasn't cosigning on the fact that Conner didn't believe Spencer was his son. Or that Spencer had shot him. That would make my only brother a murderer.

Shit! What if Conner had other kids? Oh well, too late to worry about it now. If my dad hadn't claimed them, neither was I.

Maybe having this baby was God's way of slowing me down. Sitting at the foot of my bed, I called my mother's attorney.

A woman answered, “Kendall Minter's office. This is Louise.”

“Hi, Louise, is Kendall available?”

“Who's calling?”

“Alexis Crystal. Blake Crystal's daughter.”

“Hold, please,” she said.

The next voice I heard was cheery. “Well, hello, Alexis. This is a first. I would ask if everything is okay, but you wouldn't be calling me if it were. How can I help you?” he asked.

“Yes, and no,” I told him, flipping through the pages of the trust.

He repeated, “How can I help you?”

The smile in his voice cheered me up somewhat. “Can you see if this trust that I have from my father is legitimate?”

“Absolutely. Fax, e-mail, or snail mail me a copy. I'll get back to you shortly.”

“Thanks, Kendall.”

“My pleasure,” he said, ending the call.

He could bill my mother. If this was real and I got a check, I'd pay her back.

I dialed my classmate Tréme. Hadn't spoken with her since right before summer break.

“Hey, you! I was just thinking about you,” she answered. “You enjoying your summer time off?”

Wanting to say hi, I cried instead.

“Honey, what's wrong?” Tréme asked.

I whimpered, “Everything.”

“Stop crying. Where are you?”

“I'm at home.”

“I'm on my way.”

“No, I need to get out of here. Can you meet me at Legal Sea Food in an hour?”

Tréme didn't hesitate. “See you there. Whatever it is, know that everything is temporary. You'll be okay.”

“Thanks.” I ended the call feeling better already.

I didn't wish I was more like Tréme. The world would be no fun if everybody was optimistic and bubbly all the time.

Today, I wasn't feeling a halter and heels. Normally, I wouldn't be caught dead in sweats, a men's small tank with no bra, and my tennis shoes, but that was exactly what I put on. I swooped my hair into a ponytail, fastened my Rolex watch, courtesy of James Wilcox. I grabbed my sunglasses, designer bag, then stuffed a few C-notes in my wallet. Opening the door, there was a piece of paper inside of a plastic bag hanging on the knob. A notice to pay rent or vacate my apartment. Moving out of my loft and into my dad's house was happening soon as I was certain the mansion was mine.

The small amount of joy I had vanished. I was so concerned about my inheritance I hadn't made funeral arrangements for Conner. I'd get to that and take care of my rent tomorrow. Wasn't as though my dad or the manager was going anywhere. One more day won't matter. Holding on to the ten grand did. It was all I had right now.

Tréme had sent a message.
Lunch is on me. I got you.

A text came from Spencer.
Saw the notice on your door when I got off last night. I know you have the cash from your dad, but I stopped by the office, took care of the rent and late fee for you, sis. No worries. Remember, I got you.

Tréme's offer I understood. Spencer's? What was his motivation? He saw me pocket the ten grand.

Just when I wanted to hate all men, I realized that I loved my brother. I put the notice in my purse, then headed to the restaurant to meet my friend.

Maybe she could help me make sense of my situations.

CHAPTER 41

Blake

S
lamming my door in Spencer's face felt good.

Whatever he came to offer—an apology, a confession, dick—I no longer wanted. When I was in love with him, his dick drove me insane. Spencer had hurt me one time too many.

Reality check. I'd put myself in a position to let him use me. Had to accept my responsibility. What I wasn't going to do was lose the man in front of me trying to hold on to what would never be healthy.

“It's just you and I, Max,” I said, looking down at my Yorkie.

Max wagged his tail. Followed me from the closet to the bed as I packed clothes for the week. “We're going to learn to like Charlotte. North Carolina, that is.” His nubby tail moved faster. Taking him with me was selfish, but I wasn't comfortable leaving him with Sandara since she could sporadically get booked for a go-see, fashion show, or photo shoot.

My cell rang with a special tone. It was Bing. I smiled, then sang, “Morning.”

“You hungry?”

“Yes,” I said softly.

“What time are you heading out?”

Checking the time on my phone, it was ten. “We should get on the road by two. No later than three.”

“We?”

“Yes, I've decided to take Max with me.”

“I don't think that's a good idea. You can't take him to work. What if he gets depressed being home alone all day? Dogs do suffer from depression, you know.”

I knew that but . . . “Sandara can't keep him.”

“What about Alexis? She might be able to until she starts school. At least that'll give you time to get settled into your new position, Ms. Executive. You can get him when you come home on the weekends.”

What Bing had said made complete sense. I smiled. “That's not a bad idea. I'll call her.”

“Do that now. We can drop your baby off. Then you can enjoy brunch with me.”

This time my heart smiled. He was in an indirect way claiming me as his woman.
Don't get ahead of him.
I told Bing, “I'd love that.”

“I'm on my way to get you guys,” he said, ending the call.

Was this surreal? Was he for real? Did he have a woman or two here in Atlanta? Married, single, bisexual, straight, gay, lesbian? Lots of people had multiple situations. I wasn't going to dwell on Bing possibly not being totally honest. I liked the way Bing expressed interest in me and that was that.

I shouldn't ask this, “But, God, why am I leaving now that you've sent me the one?”

There I went getting ahead again of letting the man take charge. He made me feel good. About him. About myself.

Picking up Max, I gave him a passionate hug. Maybe the love I have for my dog allowed my heart to open up. Definitely couldn't credit Billy for my willingness to be vulnerable this soon after my breakup with Spencer. I hadn't heard from Billy Blackstone since I got Max, but if I ever saw him, I'd thank him.

I called Alexis.

She answered, “Hi, Mom.”

“You sound sad. Is everything okay?”

“I'm just grateful, Mom. Not sure what direction my life is going in, but I'm at lunch with Tréme talking things out with someone who, no offense, won't judge or condemn me.”

“None taken. I understand. I called because I need a huge favor.”

“From me?” my daughter asked.

“Yes. Can you keep Max until I get settled in Charlotte?”

Alexis laughed.

“I'm serious.”

“No, Mom. I'm not laughing at you. Tréme just told me I needed to get a dog or a cat. Something to love and care for. So my answer is yes. He's a cool dude. When do you want me to get him?”

“In an hour,” I said, crossing my fingers.

“Drop him off.”

“I'll give you money to care for him. He's expensive.”

“Mom, I'm good,” she said.

I frowned. This was not the daughter I was familiar with. Since she was a kid, Alexis never turned down money from any source even when she had her own.

“Okay, sweetie. I'll see you at eleven. Bye.”

“Ma.”

“Yes.”

“I love you,” she said. “Bye.”

Before my baby girl hung up, I told her, “I love you, too, sweetheart.”

Since I was driving, I'd pack enough clothes for two weeks. Ten business suits. Ten pair of shoes. Enough panties and bras for twenty-eight days. I'd purchase toiletries when I got there. This promotion was a long time coming. Grateful, I had no buts. If Bing were meant for me, things would work out.

Zipping my suits in garment bags, I put my shoes in a suitcase. My underwear inside a leather tote. My Buckhead residence would become my weekend getaway. Every weekend could be a vacation. I'd fly back Friday night or Saturday morning and leave out Sunday afternoon. The company would reimburse me for all relocation expenses and pay the closing cost on the purchase of a home in the Charlotte area.

“Come on, Max,” I said, carrying my wardrobe to the garage. Had to make two trips to get everything in the trunk of my Benz.

The doorbell rang. Max barked, looked at me, wagged his tail, barked again. The entire time he stayed at my side. He looked at me again. Stared at the door as if to say, if you're not going, I'm not going.

Opening the door, I thought it was Bing.

Spencer said, “Blake. Please. Can we talk before you leave? I want to apologize to you.”

“Apology accepted.” I motioned to close the door.

He held it open, stepped inside. Max started barking at him.

“Hey, dude. It's me, Spencer. Chill.”

Max wagged his tail. Licked Spencer's hand. I picked my baby up.

A black town car cruised into my driveway. The driver opened the door. A pair of impeccably shined black shoes appeared first. Navy slacks, a light blue button-up with pinstripes, and the face of a man who cared for me beamed in the sunlight. My heart raced with excitement.

Bing leaned against the rear of the car.

Fearing what Bing would think seeing Spencer in my home, I whispered, “You shouldn't have come here. Please, leave.”

I wasn't stupid. Spencer wanted to piss on what was once his and I refused to let him give Bing the impression we were still involved. I made sure there was six feet of space between us.

I told Spencer the truth, “You were never good for me.”

He shook his head. “I just wanted to see you one last time.” His eyes scanned down to my vagina. He licked his lips seductively. “Do you still have feelings for me?”

Spencer wasn't desirable. My pussy didn't pucker. Eyes didn't shine. There was no smile on my face. He was good to me in the beginning. I was . . . whatever.

“No, I do not.” In my professional proper banking tone, I told him, “Spencer, it is over between us. I hurt you. You lied to me.” When I said, “Please do not show up at my house unannounced again,” Bing headed in our direction. I said loud enough for Bing to hear, “Spencer, we have nothing to discuss.”

Bypassing Spencer, Bing said, “Hi, Blake. You ready? We don't want to be late for our reservation.”

Max's tiny tail wagged hard against my arm. His body moved side to side. He almost wiggled out of my arms when he saw Bing.

Bing didn't address Spencer. “Hey, little fella,” he said, taking Max. “Blake, we have to go. Now.”

That was a fair demand. I gestured for Spencer to exit my home. He did without saying another word as if I'd done him wrong.

Getting in the town car, the driver closed the door after we settled in.

“Blake, I'm not going to interfere with whatever relationship you have or no longer have with that very young man. If he shows up again while I'm at your house, I'm done courting you.”

Wow. Even if I didn't invite him? I was not going to argue with Bing over Spencer. Courting? That was a word I had never heard a man say directly to me.

I texted Spencer,
If you come to my house again, I'm calling the police.

I meant that. I was not going to allow Spencer to do what he was obviously attempting . . . and that was to ruin my new relationship.

CHAPTER 42

Phoenix

A
w, yeah.
The first body stretch of the morning was the best.

Had to get it in before opening my eyes. I extended my arms above my head, pointed my toes to the wall. A wide mouth yawn, rotation of my head, and I relaxed back into the comfort of the mattress.

Opening my eyes, I was surprised to see her watching me. I expected Dev to be in her office consumed with creating her next brilliant show or perfecting her current episodes.

“Morning, babe,” I said to my lovely fiancée.

An awkward silence divided us. She stood there. Speechless. Wish I could read that blank expression on her face.

“You okay?” I asked.

“Afternoon, Phoenix.”

I snatched my cell from the nightstand. “One ten. Damn.” Hadn't planned on sleeping in that long.

“I'ma go shower, babe.”

Slowly she pulled the gold satin sheet uncovering my body. The cool air blowing from the vent made my chopper rise. Fluffing a pillow, Dev scanned me head to toe. Felt she was taking still photo shots of my body with each blink of her eyes.

She wasn't upset, didn't appear happy.

“Wash everything real good for me,” she said with a lustful smile.

I frowned. Ebony would've awakened me with my dick in her mouth. Taking initiative was out of character for Dev. I liked it, though.

Rubbing the cover against her breasts, she continued, “I want to try something new. You have to be squeaky clean.”

I expected her to be a total bitch after my staying out past midnight and having our daughter with me. Damn! The thought of Dev French kissing my asshole made the head of my dick touch my belly button. Hope she'd planned on tossing my salad for lunch. That shit felt amazing every time Ebony had done it. Getting my ass licked right before fellatio always made me cum fast.

Something was off. Didn't want to question her motivation. “You don't have to work on your writing today?”

“I do. But I can get to it after I'm done pleasing you.”

“Where's Nya,” I asked, hoping I didn't have to babysit on a Saturday.

“Sandara picked her up this morning.”

Yes!
That was the greatest news. “Oh, okay. Cool.”

Dev stared at my dick. “Go wash your ass, Phoenix. Now.”

I sprang to my feet. Saluted her as though she were a five-star general, clicked my heels, then did an about-face. I marched into my bathroom, closed the door, and turned the bathwater to warm.

Maybe she sensed she might lose her man if she kept denying me. As the tub filled with water, I flossed, brushed my teeth, then washed my face. I flexed in the mirror.

Biceps, chest, abs, all that.
If I were a woman, I'd definitely want a piece of this rock.
Glancing over my shoulder, my sunken spine divided my back. I had an ass tighter than a running back's. All of this sexy wrapped in the tone of sweet black licorice. Not many dudes were black as me.

As a kid I'd scrub to lighten my color. Classmates called me the tar monster. Got worse with puberty. Huge pimples were all over my face. The forehead was the worst. My grandmother used to tell me, what the world hates today people love tomorrow. She'd also preach what goes around comes back to you.

Lathering up the washcloth for the third and final round of cleaning my genitals, I unplugged the tub, then turned on the shower.

While I was wet, I massaged myself with baby oil, dried off, dabbed cologne on my neck, under my arms. Ready for whatever Dev had planned, I opened the bathroom door.

“Get in the bed, babe. Lay on your stomach. Close your eyes,” she said in the sultriest voice I'd ever heard from her.

I felt her straddle my thighs. Her pussy eased up to my ass. Hot oil drizzled on my back.

“Make love to every part of me, Dev.” I needed to be loved right now.

Her hands glided from my ass to my shoulders. She massaged the nape of my neck, the back of my head. Aw, man. Felt like the cells in my body were regenerating me into a new man. I shivered when her lips trailed kisses down my spine.

I whispered, “Babe, this is wonderful. Thanksgiving Eve.”

“Don't speak. Enjoy the moment,” she said.

The room was quiet. No music. No birds chirping outside our bedroom window. I'd slept through that. My dick was flaccid. I did not care. This was a special connection that I'd better soak in. No telling when this would happen again.

“Our wedding date, Dev. Let's make it official. Thanksgiving Eve.” Weddings in the middle of the week were cheaper. Plus, most people were either off from work or unable to attend due to their own family plans. I didn't want anything over the top.

The slickness of her palms pressed firm moving up to my shoulder blades. Her fingers tapped in small circles.

“So you're not going to answer me?” I asked.

She kissed me again. This time her tongue wiggled down to the split in my butt cheeks to my asshole. Instantly my dick got hard. I felt the tip of her tongue circle my rectum. Wanted to ask, What's gotten into you, babe?

“God, that feels so good.” With the exception of my man, the chopper, my body was limp.

Dev's cell rang.

I heard a snapping sound. The kind when a doctor puts on a fresh rubber glove. I was open to whatever.

She picked up her phone.

“Hey, where are you?” She paused. “A block away. Wow, I thought you guys were—” She paused again, then continued. “No worries. I'll meet you at the door,” Dev said.

“Who is it?”

“Sandara. She has to do a go-see. She's dropping off Nya.”

Just like that, I was shit out of finding out what she was going to do to me. There was no pleading on my behalf. Baby girl's needs always ranked over mine. A thick blue glove with an open set of lips my dick could fit through was on her left hand. A pink latex glove with the fingers cut out was in her left hand. Man I had to find out what was in store. Maybe Nya could nap for an hour.

Dev took off her glove, tossed it on the bed, put on a robe, then left the bedroom. I was dressed by the time she returned. “You seen my keys? I thought I left them on the dresser. I'ma meet up with the boyz.”

“Sorry, we couldn't finish babe. But you need to stay here until Nya gets home. Something unexpected came up and I have to go to the studio. I think I saw your keys somewhere downstairs,” she said kissing me on the cheek.

My fiancée almost gave me the most pleasure I'd received from her in months, now she was walking out? Dev showered, dressed. She had on a sexy red wrap dress that exposed her inner thighs each time she stepped toward me in those red high heels.

“The studio?” I asked.

“Yes, the studio,” she said, kissing me passionately.

“Dressed like that?”

Dev peeped out the bedroom window. She didn't look back as she said, “Sandara and Nya are here. Don't wait up for me, babe. I might have to pull an all-nighter.”