Just One Look (2004) (30 page)

Grace waited.

"I was running out the door. You have to understand. Geri was a bit of a kook. She was always so melodramatic. She said she had to tell me something important, but I figured it could wait. I figured it was about whatever new thing she was into--aromatherapy, her new rock band, her etchings, whatever. I said I'd call her back."

He stopped, shrugged. "But I forgot."

Grace wanted to say something, but nothing came to her. Words of comfort would probably do more harm than good right now. She took hold of the wheel and glanced in the rearview mirror. Emma and Max both had their heads lowered, their thumbs working the buttons on the tiny console. She felt that overwhelmed thing coming on, that pure blast in the middle of normalcy, the bliss from the everyday.

"Do you mind if we stop at the coroner's now?" Duncan asked.

Grace hesitated.

"It's about a mile away. Just turn right at the next light."

In for a penny, Grace thought. She drove. He gave directions. A minute later he pointed up ahead. "It's that office building on the corner."

The medical office seemed dominated by dentists and orthodontists. When they opened the door, there was that antiseptic smell Grace always associated with a voice telling her to rinse and spit. An ophthalmology group called Laser Today was listed for the second floor. Scott Duncan pointed to the name "Sally Li, MD." The directory said she was on the lower level.

There was no receptionist. The door chimed when they entered. The office was properly sparse. The furniture consisted of two distressed couches and one flickering lamp that wouldn't muster a price tag at a garage sale. The lone magazine was a catalogue of medical examiner tools.

An Asian woman, mid-forties and exhausted, stuck her head through the door of the inner office. "Hey, Scott."

"Hey, Sally."

"Who's this?"

"Grace Lawson," he said. "She's helping me."

"Charmed," Sally said. "Be with you in a sec."

Grace told the kids that they could keep playing their Game Boys. The danger of video games was that they shut the world out. The beauty of video games was that they shut the world out.

Sally Li opened the door. "Come on in."

She wore clean surgical scrubs with high heels. A pack of Marlboros was jammed into the breast pocket. The office, if you could call it that, had that Early American Hurricane look going for it. There were papers everywhere. They seemed to be cascading off her desk and bookshelves, almost like a waterfall. Pathology textbooks were open. Her desk was old and metal, something bought at an old elementary school garage sale. There were no pictures on it, nothing personal, though a really big ashtray sat front and center. Magazines, lots of them, were stacked high all over the place. Some of the stacks had already collapsed. Sally Li had not bothered to clean them up. She dropped herself in the chair behind her desk.

"Just knock that stuff to the floor. Sit."

Grace removed the papers from the chair and sat. Scott Duncan did the same. Sally Li folded her hands and put them on her lap.

"You know, Scott, that I'm not much with bedside manner."

"I know."

"The good thing is, my patients never complain."

She laughed. No one else did.

"Okay, so now you see why I don't get dates." Sally Li picked up a pair of reading glasses and started shuffling through files. "You know how the really messy person is always so well organized? They always say something like, 'It might look like untidy but I know where everything is.' That's crap. I don't know where . . . Wait, here it is."

Sally Li pulled out a manila file.

"Is that my sister's autopsy?" Duncan asked.

"Yep."

She slid it toward him. He opened it. Grace leaned in next to him. On the top were the words DUNCAN, GERI. There were photographs too. Grace spotted one, a brown skeleton lying on a table. She turned away, as if she'd been caught invading someone's privacy.

Sally Li had her feet on the desk, her hands behind her head. "Look, Scott, you want me to go through the rigmarole of how amazing the science of pathology has become, or do you want me to bottom-line it?"

"Skip the rigmarole."

"At the time of her death, your sister was pregnant."

Duncan's body convulsed as if she'd hit him with a cattle prod. Grace did not move.

"I can't tell you how long. No more than four, five months."

"I don't understand," Scott said. "They must have done an autopsy the first time around."

Sally Li nodded. "I'm sure."

"Why didn't they see it then?"

"My guess? They did."

"But I never knew . . ."

"Why would you? You were, what, in law school? They may have told your mom or dad. But you were just a sibling. And her pregnancy has nothing to do with the cause of death. She died in a dorm fire. The fact that she was pregnant, if they knew, would be deemed irrelevant."

Scott Duncan just sat there. He looked at Grace and then back at Sally Li. "You can get DNA from the fetus?"

"Probably, yeah. Why?"

"How long will it take you to run a paternity test?"

Grace was not surprised by the question.

"Six weeks."

"Any way to rush it?"

"I might be able to get some kind of rejection earlier. In other words, rule people out. But I can't say for sure."

Scott turned to Grace. She knew what he was thinking. She said, "Geri was dating Shane Alworth."

"You saw the picture."

She had. The way Geri looked up at Jack. She had not known the camera was on her. They were all still getting ready to pose. But what was captured, the look on Geri Duncan's face, well, it was the way you look at someone who is much more than a friend.

"Let's run the test then," Grace said.

Charlaine was holding Mike's hand when his eyes finally fluttered open.

She screamed for a doctor, who declared, in a moment of true obviousness, that this was a "good sign." Mike was in tremendous pain. The doctor put a morphine pump on him. Mike did not want to go back to sleep. He grimaced and tried to ride it out. Charlaine stayed bedside and held his hand. When the pain got bad, he squeezed hard.

"Go home," Mike said. "The kids need you."

She shushed him. "Try to rest."

"Nothing you can do for me here. Go home."

"Shh."

Mike began to drift off. She looked down at him. She remembered the days at Vanderbilt. The range of emotions overwhelmed her. There was love and affection, sure, but what troubled Charlaine right now--even as she held his hand, even as she felt a strong bond with this man who shared her life, even as she prayed and made deals with a God she'd ignored for far too long--was that she knew that these feelings would not last. That was the terrible part. In the middle of this intensity Charlaine knew that her feelings would ebb away, that the emotions were fleeting, and she hated herself for knowing that.

Three years ago Charlaine attended a huge self-help rally at Continental Arena in East Rutherford. The speaker had been dynamic. Charlaine loved it. She bought all the tapes. She started doing exactly what he said--making goals, sticking to them, figuring out what she wanted from life, trying to put things in perspective, organizing and restructuring her priorities so that she could achieve--but even as she went through the motions, even as her life began to change for the better, she knew that it would not last. That this would all be a temporary change. A new regimen, an exercise program, a diet--that was how this felt too.

It would not be happily ever after.

The door behind her opened. "I hear your husband woke up."

It was Captain Perlmutter. "Yes."

"I was hoping to talk to him."

"You'll have to wait."

Perlmutter took another step into the room. "Are the children still with their uncle?"

"He took them to school. We want things to feel normal for them." Perlmutter moved next to her. She kept her eyes on Mike. "Have you learned anything?" she asked.

"The man who shot your husband. His name is Eric Wu. Does that mean anything to you?"

She shook her head. "How did you figure that out?"

"His fingerprints in Sykes's house."

"Has he been arrested before?"

"Yes. In fact he's on parole."

"What did he do?"

"He was convicted of assault and battery, but it's believed that he's committed a number of crimes."

She was not surprised. "Violent crimes?"

Perlmutter nodded. "Can I ask you something?"

She shrugged.

"Does the name Jack Lawson mean anything to you?"

Charlaine frowned. "Does he have two kids at Willard?"

"Yes."

"I don't know him personally, but Clay, my youngest, is still at Willard. I see his wife sometimes when we do pickups."

"That would be Grace Lawson?"

"I think that's her name. Pretty woman. She has a daughter named Emma, I think. She's a year or two behind my Clay."

"Do you know her at all?"

"Not really, no. I see her at the school holiday concert, stuff like that. Why?"

"It's probably nothing."

Charlaine frowned. "You just picked that name out of a hat?"

"Early conjecture," he said, trying to dismiss it. "I also wanted to thank you."

"For?"

"For talking to Mr. Sykes."

"He didn't tell me much."

"He told you that Wu used the name Al Singer."

"So?"

"Our computer expert found that name on Sykes's computer. Al Singer. We think Wu used that alias for an online dating service. That's how he met Freddy Sykes."

"He used the name Al Singer?"

"Yes."

"It was a gay dating service then?"

"Bisexual."

Charlaine shook her head and came close to chuckling. Ain't that something? She looked at Perlmutter, daring him to laugh. He was stone-faced. They both looked down at Mike again. Mike startled. He opened his eyes and smiled at her. Charlaine smiled back and smoothed his hair. He closed his eyes and drifted back to sleep.

"Captain Perlmutter?"

"Yes."

"Please leave," she said.

While waiting for Carl Vespa to arrive, Grace started picking up the bedroom. Jack, she knew, was a great husband and father. He was smart, funny, loving, caring, and devoted. To counter that, God had blessed him with the organization skills of a citrus beverage. He was, in sum, a slob. Nagging him about it--and Grace had tried--did no good. So she stopped. If living happily was about compromise, this seemed to her like a pretty good one to make.

Grace had long ago given up on Jack clearing out the pile of magazines next to his bed. His post-shower wet towel never ended up back on the rack. Not every article of clothing made it to its ultimate destination. Right now, there was a T-shirt draped half-in, half-out of the hamper as if it'd been shot trying to escape.

For a moment Grace just stared down at the T-shirt. It was green with the word FUBU plastered across the front, and it might have one day been in vogue. Jack bought it for $6.99 at T.J. Maxx, a discount clothing store where hip goes to die. He'd put it on with a pair of too-baggy shorts. He stood in front of the mirror and started wrapping his arms around his body in a bizarre variety of ways.

"What are you doing?" Grace had asked him.

"Gangsta poses. Yo, whatchya think?"

"That I should get you seizure medication."

"Phat," he said. "Bling-bling."

"Right. Emma needs a ride to Christina's."

"Word. Dawg. Hit dat."

"Please go. Immediately."

Grace picked up the shirt now. She had always been cynical about the male species. She was guarded with her feelings. She did not open up easily. She had never believed in love at first sight--she still didn't--but when she met Jack, the attraction had been immediate, flutters in her stomach, and deny it now as much as she wanted, a small voice had told her right then and there, first meeting, that this was the man she was going to marry.

Cram was in the kitchen with Emma and Max. Emma had recovered from her earlier histrionics. She had recovered the way only kids can--fast and with very little residue. They were all eating fish sticks, Cram included, and ignoring the side dish of peas. Emma was reading a poem to Cram. Cram was a great audience. His laugh was the kind that not only filled a room but pushed against the panes of glass. You heard it, you had to either smile or cringe.

There was still time before Carl Vespa arrived. She didn't want to think about Geri Duncan, her death, her pregnancy, the way she looked at Jack in that damned photograph. Scott Duncan had asked her what she ultimately wanted. She'd said her husband back. That was still very much the case. But maybe, with all that was happening, she needed the truth too.

With that in mind Grace headed downstairs and flipped on the computer. She brought up Google and typed in "Jack Lawson." Twelve hundred hits. Too many to do any good. She tried "Shane Alworth." Hmm, no hits. Interesting. Grace tried "Sheila Lambert." Hits about a woman basketball player with the same name. Nothing relevant. Then she began trying combinations.