Just the Way You Are (16 page)

I WAS NOW MINUTES AWAY
from home. The flight had landed at an odd hour. I was unable to find a single cab at 1 am. There were no cabs even at the counter. I moved out with several passengers and broke into a brisk walk, pulling my bag behind me. It was tiring, but the thought of seeing Shagun gave me strength.

The previous week, when my new boss had come to know of the weird situation in which I had arrived in Switzerland, he called me into his office to have a word with me. He insisted that I go back to India and bring my wife to Switzerland. I had happily acquiesced and got my tickets done. My visa was still valid so I didn't have any trouble. I just had to see Shagun. Her radiant face brimming with laughter came to me in snatches during the entire journey. I wanted to be with her, hold her close, and tell her how much I had missed her. She must be missing me too, I was sure.

As I walked down the empty cobbled street, my steps echoing, I saw a line of autos. I asked a driver if he was willing to go till my place. He seemed to be a godsend, as he nodded and gestured for me to get inside with my luggage.

The moment I entered the house, Mom came running to me, ‘Arre, why didn't you inform us that you were coming? Did something happen at work, beta? Chalo, it's good that you have come back.'

‘Mom, I got some leave so I decided to come home.' I smiled at her.

‘Ah, uff! Anyway, come in, come in. At least you have come. Do you know how much I have missed you?' She came close to me and kissed my forehead. Dad stood by my side, patting my back. He seemed to be proud of me. I embraced him and looked around for Shagun.

‘Mom, where's Shagun?' I asked.

‘Oh, she must be asleep. She came back late from the university and had to check a lot of assignments. I gave her some haldi-wala milk. She went to sleep just an hour back.'

I went inside the room and found Shagun's face pressed against the pillow. Her hair was scattered and tangled on the white sheet. She looked like an abandoned little girl. There were no lines on her face and her eyes, though closed, looked as if they were meant to sleep peacefully. Such peace on the face of a person was only possible if one had peace at heart. A brown diary lay at the side of her pillow. It looked familiar. My heart skipped a beat when I realized what it was. She had found my diary. My beautiful world was rocked on a cliff and I felt it would crumble any moment. Just when I was about to grab hold of the diary, she put out a hand towards it. She had her eyes open now and looked at me. I could see nothing but delight on her face. But I was perhaps too ashamed by then, that she had come to know all of me. I immediately jumped into self-explanatory justifications.

‘Shagun, the diary not true. I am no longer the person I was, Shagun, believe me.'

She was still lying on the bed, her hand holding mine. She kept looking at me and smiling but didn't answer. She pulled me down and had me sit close to her.

‘Shagun, I really don't know what to say. I have loved you with all my heart and I honestly have no proof of that, except my words. I don't know …' I lowered my head and covered my face with my hands, not knowing what more to say.

She sat up and pulled my hands away from my face, and hugged me. For a few seconds, she ruffled my hair with her fingers and in a single whisper said what I had longed to hear since I knew of love.

‘Sameer, come what may and whatever you may be today, I have and I will always love you, just the way you are.'

TIME REALLY FLIES AND
here I am with my third novel—the story that I always wanted to tell, that was inside me for a very long time, is finally here. I feel immensely happy thinking that how in these years things have changed for me—my life and everything around me. I thought I would be able to tell only one story but with time, as I started meeting people, new stories kept forming in my head. This novel is also a result of the same. But it didn't happen overnight. In fact, it took a lot of pain because after writing half the script, I lost my laptop and didn't have the draft copy saved anywhere else. That time was very frustrating but I recalled a quote by Thomas Edison: ‘There is a great value in disaster because you can start all over again.' This quote motivated me and, having no other option, I started all over again, trying to recall what I had written earlier, but couldn't capture much. At last, after working day and night, the book turned out to be the way I had visualized in my mind. I believe writing a new book is a new journey but something that can't be done alone. There are several great people who accompanied me during this journey and made it smooth during the frustrating times.

I thank my mom and dad who supported me throughout this journey, encouraged me, and gave me the freedom to do what I wanted to do. My brother and sister, thanks to you both for being part of this journey.

Gaurav Deka, thanks a lot. This book happened because of you. It was tough to write this one without your help and support. And I really feel sorry for pestering you during your Europe tour. Thanks for helping in every possible way and listening to my questions, without showing your frustration and understanding the situation. Rakesh, thank you. It's rare to find friends like you. Special thanks to both of you for reading drafts of the manuscript over and over again, helping to me finalize the script, remaining with me when things looked dark, and offering every possible help.

I want to express my gratitude to all my lovely readers who bought my book, read it, and took pains to connect with me on social media or through email. I thank you from the bottom of my heart. It is your love and affection that were pillars of support to me during dark times.

Surabhi Priyadarshini, thank you for listening to unnecessary details of the book, laughing at my poor jokes, and empowering me through my rough days despite your tight schedule.

Gurveen Chadha, thanks for giving me the opportunity to come up with this story. Pallavi Narayan, thank you for your careful, wise, razor-sharp editing and for sorting out my unnecessary queries, offering me the best possible solutions, and making the process smooth for me. Thanks to the entire Random House team for helping me at every stage of publishing.

Lastly, my deepest and sincere thanks to all of you who remain connected with me and have faith in me.

EBURY PRESS

Random House Publishers India Private Limited, 7th Floor, Infinity Tower C, DLF Cyber City, Gurgaon – 122 002, Haryana, India
Random House Group Limited, 20 Vauxhall Bridge Road, London SW1V 2SA, United Kingdom

Published by Random House India in 2014

www.randomhouse.co.in

Copyright © Sanjeev Ranjan 2014

Cover design: Tara Upadhyay

This book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, resold, hired out, or otherwise circulated without the publisher's prior consent in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.

ISBN: 978-81-8400-634-6

This digital edition published in 2014.
e-ISBN: 978-81-8400-675-9