Keep the Faith (Bulletproof #1.5) (3 page)

Chapter 4

Sarah

The café was a mad house. Everyone was scurrying around like mice. Nobody watching where they were walking, coffee was getting spilled everywhere you turned. Which only added to the amount of stress I was under. It’s bad enough Jayde was missing, but this café was falling apart. Knowing Phoebe, she just had to leave in the middle of lunch time right when the rush was filtering in. Sure, there was money that needed to be deposited into the bank at that exact moment but hell, it could have waited. Regular customers were complaining they weren’t getting their mocha latte Americano with light whipped cream or some other fancy drink bullshit like that. All the orders started blurring together after a while.

Luckily, thank the bright stars in space we had just hired a new employee and he was picking up on our routine and how things run around here which made everything else move smooth as silk. Leo, who also happens to be Phoebe’s cousin, decided he wanted to help out with his cousin’s café while he was on break from college. Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t protest to additional help, but when he walked in on that first day, I was floored. Phoebe comes from a long line of beautiful genetics. It must be that California air. Leo looks like one of those guys off Baywatch. Without the cheesy, slow-motion running.

“Leo! There’s a customer at the register. Would you mind taking that for me?” I yell from the espresso machine as it churns and heats up milk for lattes. I turn back around before he can see my blush. To say I’m a bit smitten with him is an understatement. It’s a full on crush.

“Sure thing doll.” His use of a sweet term of endearment has me smiling. There’s just a little itty bitty problem….he’s twenty-five years old. Granted, he’s only been working here for a couple weeks, but he’s just there. All the time. Silently tormenting me to no end with his beautiful olive skin and bright blue eyes. Typical California boy with all the bells and whistles. 

It’s no secret he likes me. Oh, this girl isn’t dense. I know exactly how he feels. I catch him watching me when I turn to watch him. A double stalker effect if you want to get technical. And if I was in a different situation, maybe I could like him too. But Jayde needs me more than anything right now and I can’t get involved with anybody, hot or not. It’s just not feasible right now.

As if I was caught with my hand in the cookie jar, Leo pulls me from my thoughts by tapping me on the shoulder. “Did you hear me? I need a bear claw and a chocolate chip muffin with a small coffee.” His hand still lingers on my shoulder and the warmth had me shivering. Ignoring it, I go to make the order and hand it to the customer without getting distracted anymore from my new co-worker. I smile in spite of myself because if Jayde were here, she would be having the same thoughts right now. Or telling me to stop being a coward and ask him out.

Maybe these were selfish thoughts. I didn’t know how to sort them out until they were thrown right in front of me. Hell, even then I still can’t sort them out. Looking around the café, avoiding Leo’s gaze at all costs, the familiar sounds of coffee beans being ground, the friendly chatter of the regulars filtering through, all a reminder of how insane my life has become recently. Jayde was always the rock that held everything together. Now that she’s gone, that rock has been lifted making my life an utter wreck. More selfish thoughts of the great and pathetic Sarah Burgess.

Phoebe comes strolling in from the back room unannounced and practically makes me jump out of my skin.

“What the hell? When did you get back?” I say in surprise. Spinning around suddenly at her return, my clumsy ass knocks over a tray of pastries that were sitting on the rack, cooling before being put out for display. I groan inwardly, trying not to show the distain on my face. 

Phoebe catches the tray just in time before they all clattered onto the floor, but a few didn’t make it. “Whoa, where’s the fire?” She asks amused. The only fire is in my broken heart, that’s where. I quickly squat down to retrieve the ruined pastries from the disgusting floor.

Chewing on my bottom lip, I grab the nearest trash can my icing caked hands can grasp and start chucking the pastries one by one into the garbage.

“Sarah,” Phoebe says but I barely register it. The only thing that is in my focus is getting these pastries into the trash and a fresh batch into the oven before the next rush comes through.

“Sarah!” she yells, but still nothing. Phoebe doesn’t realize what’s going on inside my head. What war I’m raging within myself. She doesn’t know what happened. Nobody does or did. Now it’s all over the fucking news and any hush hush that has been kept quiet is thrown out the goddamn window. A single tear slides down my cheek, landing on my shirt. Followed by another then another and before the last pastry is tossed, I’m sobbing uncontrollably on the floor of the café.

Phoebe grabs the trash can and tosses it aside, spilling the contents I just cleaned up which only angers me more. “Why did you do that?!” I say between sniffles. Wiping my tears with my apron, I kneel over to try and pick up what was tossed out but Phoebe stops me by pulling me up like a five-year-old.

“Come with me,” she demands, pulling on my shirt to lead me in the direction of her office. Normally when anyone goes in there, it’s to get their final paycheck after being eighty-sixed. Nobody goes in Phoebe’s office, ever.

“Close the door behind you and have a seat,” she demands once we’re inside her office. I do as she says before taking a seat in the brown leather chair against the wall facing her desk.

Settling into the seat, my head stays cast down. Tear stains coat my shirt and apron. I’m sure my make-up looks like a two-dollar whore on the streets of Vegas.

“Sarah, I know what you’re going through. Hell, no I don’t because I can’t even imagine what something like this must be doing to you. Your sister, as brave and strong as she is, will come right back to you. I believe that with all my heart. Leo has been asking me why you’ve been off and I finally told him.” Looking up into her gaze, I try to remain passive but it fails drastically. I didn’t want the whole world to know this but it’s looking like that isn’t going to be the case.

“I didn’t want him to know. He doesn’t even know me,” I mumble under my breath. Nor should I let him get to know me in such a state I’m in.

“Doesn’t matter. Leo has sort of a sixth sense for certain people. When he came to me the other day asking about you, I brushed it off. I thought you wouldn’t let it interfere with your work, but I can see that it has and for good reason. You have been spending way too much time here and not focusing on what’s really important.”

For the longest time, I tried to fight it. Tried to keep it away from work, and away from anyone who wasn’t family. That fight was a losing fucking battle from the start. I should have known my work family and actual family would collide one day. I smile without meeting her gaze at my sudden unspoken use of the word fuck. Jayde would be so proud.

“You’re smiling. I can’t tell if you’re happy or having a straight-jacket moment,” Phoebe says with a tilt to her head. I shake it off suddenly while dabbing my eyes with my apron.

“Are we done here? I need to go clean up and get back to work,” I say, trying to appease her so she’ll let me go.

“Definitely a straight-jacket moment. Why don’t you go ahead and get out of here, take the rest of the time off you need until she’s found. It’ll do you some good.”

Shaking my head, I stand up suddenly. “I can’t. If I don’t have some sense of normalcy in my life right now, I’ll lose it. I’ll go mad.”

“Sweetheart, you’ve already gone mad. Otherwise I wouldn’t be contemplating calling the big men with the even bigger needle to come sedate you.”

Laughing at her humor, I wave her off. A padded room doesn’t sound too bad right now. “Nah, that’s not needed. I had my little cry and now I’m fine.”

“Sarah. You don’t need to put on an act around here. We can all tell you’re hurting which also hurts us. I can definitely see you need to get away from here, so tell you what I’m going to do. You’re going to leave this office, go get your shit, grab some food and take off as long as she is missing. And yes, I’ll pay you. Come back when she is found and not a minute sooner.”

I gape at her. “But, Phoebe! What about the shop? What about the regulars? What about…?”

“What about Leo?” She smirks, tapping her slender fingers on the edge of her desk. “Oh, he’ll be here, slaving away as if nothing’s changed. But he understands what you’re going through and fully supports you taking a break from here. Besides, there are other ways of communicating if you so need to see each other. Phone calls, texting, email, social media. You’re a smart woman, Sarah. I know you’ll use your head. I see the way you two have been peeking at each other. I’m not stupid.”

“Is it that obvious? This was the last thing I needed right now, I hope he realizes that I can’t do the relationship thing right now. I can’t have any distractions.”

Phoebe stands up and comes around the side of her desk to lean on the front, crossing her legs at the ankles and giving me a saddened look. “Oh, he does. Believe me, he does. All these college girls that come through here and he can’t take his eyes off of you. He’s always had a thing for older women, gets that from his mom.” The look of pride in her face is breathtaking. Age must be as big of a deal in her family as who ate the last Brussel sprout at dinner time.

“Ha, I’m not that much older. I’m only thirty-four which only makes me nine years older than him,” I say like it’s the worst possible thing in the world.

“So what? My first husband was ten years younger than me. Age is nothing but a number, honey, and if you let something like that stop you, then life will be kicking your ass before sunset and you don’t want that, trust me.”

Age has never really bothered me before, so why should I start letting it now? Nodding, I stand up to adjust my wrinkled, icing covered uniform before returning back to work life.

“Don’t forget what I said. I don’t want to have to fire you to keep you out of here,” Phoebe says seriously with a hint of amusement, but part of me knows she’s hardly ever kidding when it comes to taking shit seriously.

“Yes I know. That’s why I’m going to go get my purse and head out,” I say with a smile. “Good girl,” she says and out the office I go. Maybe a tiny break is exactly what I need to get everything cleared up in my head, or at least keep whatever sanity I have left until Jayde is found.

Those same words from before replay in my mind like a hamster wheel that never ends. Keep the faith. Repeat the mantra. Keep. The. Faith.

Chapter 5

Sarah

Zac has been blowing up my phone ever since I left the café a few hours ago. Repeated messages filter through the unique ones;
I don’t know what else to do; Maybe I should just give up; This is taking such a fucking toll on me, Sarah; I’m so in love with her I can barely stand it; I’d die if something happened to her.

And the one heart pounding message that always stands out above all else…
I’m going to kill that sorry-ass, no-good mother fucker if it’s the last thing I do. He’s going to die. Just wait until I get my hands around his throat, I’ll watch as I squeeze the last of his sorry-ass life straight from his body.

That last message convinced me he is slowly losing it, but I can’t really blame him. We’re all going nuts around here. Thankfully, none of us have to go through it alone. Since Phoebe said I didn’t have to return to the café until Jayde is found, I figure I might as well leave all thoughts of work behind. After leaving the café, I make the short walk to the newspaper, leaving my car behind.

Palmetto Times was a constant display of hustle and bustle. Sort of like you would see on those old movies from the twenties. The flow of people, trying to get the latest top news stories out for the world to enjoy. No wonder Jayde loved this place so much. Off to the side, tacked up on the wall in a beautiful brown oak frame, is a picture of our dad. I smile proudly at the picture, thinking how proud of both of us he would be. There’s so much he wanted to happen with this paper, so many expansions to make on it. Jayde was able to build up on it to the point to where it was making a huge success, with the subscribers pushing into the hundreds for print and thousands more for digital media. She was able to upgrade the office from some run down shack to a glorious office suite just off Warren Street. It’s not glamorous, but it works. Dad would have loved the location. Not too far from the ocean, but just enough to avoid the busy bustling of tourists who are passing through.

Gwen strolls out of the huge office and walks back to her desk, and Anna follows shortly after. Rushing up to her, I grab her and pull her into a hug.

“Oh, hello Sarah,” she says laughing. I know she hates public displays of affection but hell, I’m so grateful to her for taking over during this stressful time.

“Hey, Anna. Sorry for just dropping by unexpectedly, but I just left work and needed to see this place,” I say sadly.

Anna ignores my saddened expression and checks the time on her phone. “Damn, it’s early afternoon. You left work sort of early.” I nod. “Yeah, well it wasn’t really my doing. Phoebe made me because I wasn’t able to focus clearly, making my work production sub-par. So she sent me home until Jayde is found.”

Anna smiles sadly but nods. She looks around the floor of the paper, noticing everyone is working their butts off to get whatever needs to get done.

“What?” I ask curiously. It’s never a good sign when Anna has a far-away look in her eyes.

“I was just thinking. What if you worked here? I mean, you can definitely tell we need the extra help to make deadlines. Plus, it will keep you busy so you don’t have to think about it too much, like me,” Anna says as a tear falls down her cheek, but she quickly wipes it away before anyone has a chance to notice, but I did.

“Oh Anna. We’ll find her, I know we will. Hell, I’ve cried enough for all of us lately. But sure, I guess I can try and help out the best that I can. I don’t know anything about newspapers or writing. That was always Jayde’s expertise.”

Anna smiles widely. “Oh, this is going to be fun. Don’t worry, I’ll teach you. If Jayde taught me anything, it was the area of reporting and telling a story.”

If Jayde were here, I’d kick her curvy ass from here to Timbuktu for even putting me in this position. Could I seriously take up news reporting?

What the hell did I just sign up for?