Kendra Kandlestar and the Door to Unger (7 page)

AT THE SOUND OF THIS STRANGE VOICE, everyone turned to see a most remarkable character waddle into the dim light of the tunnel. One glimpse told Kendra that he was none other than a Dwarf, for she had met one on her last journey into the outside world. Now, it might seem odd for an Een such as Kendra to call this creature a Dwarf, for indeed, he was at least twice as big as she. But of course, to you or me, he would have appeared quite small—but a Dwarf he certainly was, for he had a gray bushy beard, large ears, and a long nose. The most peculiar aspect of the figure, however, was that he was covered from head to foot in keys. These hung from his arms and his waist and even from his beard, so that he jingled and jangled as he moved.

“Poor little Pooky-Wooens,” the Dwarf exclaimed as he approached the edge of the shore and looked upon the skerpent. “Have they been playin’ rough with ya?”

“Rough!” cried Jinx, who was still ensnared within the knot of tongues. “Who do you think is in trouble here, anyway?”

“Eh, what’s that?” the Dwarf asked, looking upon Jinx as if he was just noticing her predicament. “Oh, righty! Okay, Pooky-Wooens, ya can let the little shrimp go.”

At once, the skerpent dropped Jinx, and she fell into the water with a splash. The skerpent cast a glare in the direction of Kendra and the others before slithering off into the dark corners of the tunnel. As for Jinx, she swam to shore to join her friends, an angry scowl upon her face.

The Dwarf now approached Kendra and the rest of the company and looked upon them with interest. He had a gleam in his eye, and Kendra for one could not tell if his intentions were good or ill. “Well, yer tiny folk aren’t ya?” the Dwarf said after a moment. “We’re used to havin’ bigger sl—well, that is, we ain’t used to seein’ folks smaller then ourselves here in the Kingdom of Umbor.”

“The Kingdom of Umbor!” Professor Bumblebean exclaimed. “Do you mean to say we have arrived in the fabled land of the Dwarves?”

“You know it, do ya?” the Dwarf asked.

“Aye,” Uncle Griffinskitch replied. “We met a Dwarf on our last journey. Perhaps you have heard of him? His name is Pugglemud.”

The Dwarf eyed the old wizard closely, and scratched his beard as if in deep thought. He jingled as he scratched, and now that she was closer, Kendra had a better look at the character’s strange assortment of keys. These were keys of all kinds: some were long, some were short, some were new and sparkling, some were old and tarnished. It seemed as if the Dwarf had a key for every type of lock she could imagine.

“Well, I don’t know any Pugglemud,” the Dwarf said after another moment. “But I’ll have to bring ya before King Reginaldo now. I can’t be leavin’ ya to be wanderin’ around his dominions.”

“And who are you?” Uncle Griffinskitch asked the Dwarf.

“You can call me Crumpit,” the Dwarf replied. “I am the Key Master, on the account that I carry all these keys.”

“Who would have guessed?” Jinx sneered, for she was still cross from her fight with the skerpent.

“Well, come on, then,” Uncle Griffinskitch said to Crumpit. “Lead us on to your king.”

The company quickly gathered their belongings, which were still strewn about the rocks from their fight with the skerpent, and after a few moments, were in line behind the peculiar Key Master.

“I’m pretty sure I could invent a better system for this fellow to carry all those keys,” Ratchet remarked. “Add that to the list, Oki.”

“The list of what?” the tiny mouse asked.

“The list of all my great ideas,” Ratchet replied. “Aren’t you keeping a list? Just what kind of slave are you?”

“Ratchet!” Kendra exclaimed as she shouldered her pack. “How many times do I have to tell you? He’s your APPRENTICE. Not your slave.”

“Yeesh,” Ratchet muttered. “The way you fuss over words, you’d think you were Bumblebean, Kendra.”

“You can all jus’ quit yer chatter,” Crumpit called over his shoulder. “We have a bit of a journey ahead of us.”

The Dwarf led them down the tunnel a short way before coming to a stop before a section of the rocky wall. To Kendra, the wall seemed no different than any other part of the tunnel, but Crumpit now unhooked a key from just below his knee and inserted it into a small hole in the rock. Then with a groan, a section of the wall pulled away, revealing a dark set of steps.

“Down we go,” Crumpit said.

“Oh, great turnips,” Oki murmured to Kendra. “Aren’t we ever going to start going
upwards
?”

“It’s okay,” Kendra said, taking the mouse’s paw. “Just stay close to me.”

The stairs seemed to wind down into the very center of the earth, but they had only taken a dozen or so steps when Crumpit suddenly stopped, bent to his knees, and took a small silver key from under his armpit. This he inserted into a small slot in the step just ahead of him. He turned the key with a click and then lifted up the step to reveal another set of stairs, leading even further down.

This time they took the steps all the way to bottom, where they ended in a small round chamber. There were eight doors in the room. Without a moment’s hesitation, Crumpit went to the door that was second from their left and produced a small rusted key from behind his ear.

“There are so many doors in this place,” Kendra told Uncle Griffinskitch, as the key master fiddled with the lock. “Maybe one of them is the Door to Unger.”

“It’s unlikely, Kendra,” Uncle Griffinskitch murmured. “But perhaps this King Reginaldo will be able to shed some light on the mystery.”

“If we ever get to him,” Kendra remarked. “This place seems to be bursting with tricks.”

“Indeed,” Professor Bumblebean agreed. “I do say, Mr. Crumpit, are you not worried that we will remember this secret set of doors into the land of Umbor? You haven’t even blindfolded us!”

“Ya won’t remember it at all,” Crumpit replied, finally opening the door and leading them through to the passage beyond. “It’s a long way, and it takes a lifetime fer a Key Master to remember everything along the way. And one wrong turn can mean disaster.”

“What do you mean?” Kendra asked.

“Well, fer example, if we took the wrong door back that way we would have ended up in a nest of skerpents,” Crumpit explained, pausing to return his key to its rightful place on his body. “And those ones aren’t friendly like our little Pooky-Wooens.”

“Oh, dear,” Oki murmured. “I’d sure hate to meet a
big
Pooky-Wooens.”

“It’s no account anyway,” Crumpit muttered. “I doubt much you’ll be comin’ back this way.”

“And what do you mean by that, Crumpit?” Uncle Griffinskitch asked.

“Eh? What’s that?” the Dwarf asked. “Oh, nothin’. Now, c’mon, we’re just gettin’ started.”

With this remark, the strange fellow continued on his way, leading the small company through the network of caverns and unlocking doors with his collection of keys. This activity continued for several hours. Sometimes the doors were plain to see, and sometimes they were hidden. Some were in the floor, some were in the ceiling, and some were so tiny that the Dwarf had to crawl through on all fours (though Kendra and her friends were so small compared to Crumpit that they could just walk through normally). Once they had to cross a lake of bubbling lava on a narrow bridge of rock. Halfway across, Crumpit stopped, inserted a key into the bridge deck, and a large bucket was lowered down on a chain from the ceiling. They all climbed in and were pulled up to the next series of caverns. Kendra could only imagine what would have happened if one were to cross the length of the rock bridge. She guessed that it might collapse when you were almost to the other side; or maybe a terrible creature was waiting to attack any unsuspecting intruder.

In any case, Kendra realized that Crumpit was right; there was no way she could remember all the twists and turns that led to the Kingdom of Umbor. Without him to guide them, they would never find their way into—or out of—the land of Dwarves.

The trip seemed to stretch on for hour upon hour. Kendra had been so used to sitting in the boat that it was quite a bit of exercise to suddenly use her legs through such a set of stairs and tunnels, and she could tell by the grunts and groans from the rest of the party that they felt much the same, save for Jinx, who rarely seemed to tire. Kendra kept hoping that each door would mean the end of their journey, but still the strange Key Master continued on, opening door after door with his assortment of keys.

“How many doors do you think we’ve gone through?” Oki asked Kendra after a time.

“I’ve lost count, to tell the truth,” Kendra replied. “Maybe a hundred.”

“It feels like a thousand, if you ask me,” Oki said.

In any case, a hundred or a thousand, the small party was to pass through several more doors yet before Crumpit finally brought them to a halt. Before them stood a simple door of iron and wood and the Key Master now spoke his first words in many hours.

“Well, we’re here, don’t ya know,” he declared, reaching into his black beard and producing one last key. “On the other side of this here door is the land of Umbor.”

YOU HAVE PROBABLY NEVER BEEN to visit a king, let alone one who is a Dwarf. Well, let me tell you, what Dwarves may lack in grace, manners, and charm, they do their best to compensate with gold, silver, and jewels. This was something that Kendra and her friends were to discover firsthand; for now, as Crumpit unlocked the last of the doors, they passed into an enormous world of bedazzling riches.

At first, Kendra mistakenly thought that they had come to the surface of the earth, for the space was so vast that it went as far as her tiny eyes could see. It was only when she looked upward that she noticed a vaulted ceiling, high above them.

“Why, we’re not outside at all!” the tiny Een girl declared.

“No indeed,” Professor Bumblebean said. “It’s one gigantic subterranean cavern and, as I’ve read in my books, it houses the entire Kingdom of Umbor.”

“And what a kingdom!” Ratchet murmured with a low whistle. “Everything here seems to be made of gold!”

Kendra could not have said it much better herself. Everywhere she looked, she was met by the glimmer of gold. The streets were paved with gold stone. The houses were built with gold bricks. Even the trees were gold, with gold bark and leaves made from large green emeralds. Kendra turned slowly around to take in the sights, rubbing her eyes at the brilliance. After the darkness of the tunnels, the glimmering wealth of Umbor was quite blinding.

“Well, c’mon now,” Crumpit declared. “I reckon I should present ya to his majesty.”

They set off through the golden streets, the key master leading the way with a noisy jingle. They could now see a great many Dwarfs bustling about, and many of them stopped to stare at the small party.

“I reckon most Dwarves ain’t see no Eens before,” Crumpit commented.

“I do say,” Professor Bumblebean remarked as he looked about. “Don’t you have any women or children here, in the Kingdom of Umbor? All of your fine citizens seem to be men.”

“Of course, we got women and children,” Crumpit replied. “Why, here’s a playground of younguns right here on yer left.”

“Why, they all have beards!” Kendra declared.

“Of course they do,” Crumpit said. “Every Dwarf has one! Even younguns!”

“I ought to invent an easy way for these folks to shave,” Ratchet said, scratching his chin thoughtfully. “Add that to the list, Oki.”

“I haven’t had time to start a list yet,” the mouse said.

“Well, what in the name of turnips have you been doing?” the raccoon asked as they ambled down the street.

“I’ve been kind of busy trying not to die,” Oki explained. “You know, what with the bottomless stairs, the three-headed skerpent, and all the rest.”

“Excuses, excuses,” Ratchet muttered.

Before long they arrived at the palace of King Reginaldo. Unlike the rest of the buildings in the cavern, which were short and squat, the palace was tall and graceful, with golden walls and gleaming panes of silver glass. Crumpit led them up some stairs to a pair of tall golden doors that were studded with large red rubies. The Dwarf unlatched a key from his elbow and used it to knock on one of the doors.

“Eh?” came a scratchy voice from behind the door. “Who’s that knockin’?”

“Why, it’s me, the Key Master,” Crumpit replied.

“Well, whatcha want?” the gatekeeper asked. “Shouldn’t ya be patrollin’ the tunnels and keepin’ the locks oiled?”

“I’ve got some new sl—well, that is, I’ve got some folk for King Reginaldo to meet,” Crumpit replied.

“Well, that’s different now, ain’t it?” the gatekeeper said with a new cheer in his voice. In the next moment the massive doors creaked open and they were met by an old hunched Dwarf. He had a long gray beard and he wore a large pair of square spectacles.

“Strange sl—I mean, folk, ya have here,” the gatekeeper said to Crumpit.

“They’re Eens, don’t ya know,” the Key Master declared. “Now go and announce us to King Reginaldo.”

“I will indeed,” the gatekeeper replied, and Kendra could not help but to notice a twinkle in his eyes as he scurried away to do his duty.

“How long will we have to wait?” Uncle Griffinskitch asked Crumpit.

“Not long,” the key master replied. “King Reginaldo likes to meet folk.”

Sure enough, it was only a few minutes later when the gatekeeper returned, rubbing his hands together with glee. “C’mon then,” he said. “His majesty awaits.”

They now walked through the golden doors and found themselves in a grand hall. A long golden carpet ran down the center of the room, ending at the throne of the Dwarf king. Dwarves lined either side of the carpet, and presently, they raised trumpets to their lips and filled the hall with the blare of music.

After the trumpets quieted, one of the Dwarf courtiers proclaimed, “Welcome to the court of his Royal Majesty, King Reginaldo IV, Ruler of the Kingdom of Umbor and Grand Lord over all Underground Dominions.”

“What a lot of pomp for a bunch of scoundrels,” Jinx remarked.

“Humph,” Uncle Griffinskitch muttered, and Kendra thought it was the type of humph that meant he quite agreed.

When the reached the end of the carpet, they stopped and bowed before the throne, which, of course, was made of gold and beset with jewels. And yet, Kendra hardly noticed these riches, for it was the figure sitting in the throne that commanded her attention. The Dwarf king was fat and squat, with a red beard and a sharp nose. He was dressed head to foot in gold, with golden boots, golden robes, and a tall golden crown upon his head. The most noticeable aspect of the king’s wardrobe, however, was the belt that encircled his waist. The belt had been fashioned from a wide strip of gold and sparkled with rubies and sapphires.

Kendra looked upon the Dwarf king with curiosity. She had never met a king, and yet somehow this character seemed familiar. She just couldn’t quite put her finger on it . . .

Then the king spoke.

“Well, if it ain’t a bunch o’ Een folk, don’t ya know,” he declared. “Come to gaze upon me gold, are ya? Tee hee!”

“Why, Pugglemud!” Kendra exclaimed. “It’s you!”

There was no mistaking the voice of the Dwarf they had met during their search for the Box of Whispers. When Kendra had first met Pugglemud, he had been dressed all in rags, so it was difficult to recognize him draped in gold. But it was him all right; now, upon closer inspection, Kendra could see the real Pugglemud through all the finery. His bushy red beard was in desperate need of a trim and his fingernails were split and broken and covered in grime. All his luxurious clothes could not disguise the fact that, at heart, he was just a slob.

“Eh?” the king muttered in response to Kendra’s exclamation. “What’s that? I ain’t go by Pugglemud no more. I be his majesty, King Reginaldo the—,”

“Yes, we know,” Jinx interrupted. “Ruler of the everything and dominions of dirt and all that rot. But you’re still Pugglemud to us. Or have you completely forgotten our adventures in the Castle of Krodos? Remember, you left us to tangle with that dragon all on our own.”

“Ahem,” the Dwarf king grunted. “Well, of course I ‘member all those grand times we had together, don’t ya know. Though I don’t quite know what yer talkin’ about with that dragon an’ such. As I ‘member it, I jus’ about saved yer skins.”

“Humph,” Uncle Griffinskitch muttered.

“I think all this gold has gone to your head,” Jinx said.

“Gold! Tee hee!” Pugglemud giggled, but after a moment, he recovered from his mirth and a stern expression came to his face. “The point bein’,” he said (and now he stood up in his throne, and hooked his thumbs in his magnificent gold belt so that all could see it), “I be known as King Reginaldo now. And you’ll be callin’ me that.”

Pugglemud gazed down upon them as if he expected something to happen. It was as if, Kendra thought, he was waiting for them to shout out “King Reginaldo” all at once—and, in truth, part of her felt compelled to do just that. In fact, she suddenly felt a strange loyalty to the Dwarf king, and she started to fall to her knees.

Then Uncle Griffinskitch thumped his staff against the gold floor, and the soft thump broke Kendra’s momentary trance.

“Humph,” Uncle Griffinskitch muttered. “I can see you have some magic at work in your court,
King
,”—and here Kendra found herself gazing upon the Dwarf’s belt—“But remember: You are not the only one who is able to cast such enchantment. Or do I need you to remind you of your trousers?”

Kendra muffled a giggle as she recalled the time when they had first met Pugglemud. The Dwarf had not believed in Uncle Griffinskitch’s magic then, but to prove his wizardry, the old Een had caused Pugglemud’s trousers to start on fire.

“Well, ahem,” the Dwarf king muttered, eyeing Uncle Griffinskitch’s staff with caution. “There ain’t no need to go bringin’ that up. We’re just all old pals after all.”

“Indeed,” Uncle Griffinskitch grunted.

“But Pugglemud—I mean King Reginaldo,” Kendra stammered, “Why are you, I mean—er, how did you—,”

“What she’s trying to say,” Jinx interrupted, “is how in the name of Een did you ever become a king? The last time we saw you, you were sitting in the rubble of the castle of Krodos with every monster known to Eenkind coming toward you to get its share of gold.”

“Gold!” Pugglemud repeated, giggling so that all could see his gold-capped teeth. “Tee hee! Ah, yes, all that wonderful gold. Tee hee! Well, that’s a tale fer sure. But perhaps it’d be better fer another time, don’t ya know. What about you wee folks? I reckon yer still lookin’ fer that fancy-smancy treasure of yers, eh? The box of what’s-it-now?”

“Humph,” Uncle Griffinskitch muttered. “We found our Box of Whispers. We’re on a quest of another kind.”

“Eh, an’ what’s that?” Pugglemud asked. “Ya ain’t come to steal all me gold, have ya now?”

“I do say!” Professor Bumblebean declared. “What would Eens do with such treasure?”

“Swim in it, of course,” Pugglemud declared. “That’s what us Dwarves do.”

“We’re not interested in gold,” Uncle Griffinskitch told the Dwarf gravely. “We’re searching for a door.”

“Well, we got a lot o’ doors about here,” Pugglemud said, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. “I’ll sell ya one if ya like.”

“Humph,” Uncle Griffinskitch muttered, and Kendra could tell that it was the type of humph that meant the old wizard was growing impatient.

“It’s a special door we’re looking for,” Kendra explained to the Dwarf king. “It’s called the Door to Unger.”

“Well I ain’t ever heard of no such door,” Pugglemud said. “And I ain’t ever heard of a land of Unger either. Them critters ain’t got no proper kingdom like me, King Reginaldo IV. So how can there be a door to a place that don’t exist no how?”

“Aye,” Uncle Griffinskitch returned wearily. “But we seek the door nonetheless.”

“What ya need to do is find some Ungers,” Pugglemud said, leaning forward in his throne. He had a strange gleam in his eye, reminding Kendra of the look that she had seen in the gatekeeper.

“And I suppose you know where to find some?” Jinx asked.

“Maybe I do, maybe I don’t,” Pugglemud replied mysteriously. “But first things first. I don’t want ya to be thinkin’ that King Reginaldo don’t know how to treat guests. We’ll have ya come to the royal hall fer some grub tonight, don’t ya know.”

“But we need to be on our way,” Kendra said with an anxious tug on her long braids. “We have to find the Door to Unger, you see. It’s really urgent, and—,”

“What’s that?” Pugglemud said, his face going red. “I suppose the hospitality of the Dwarves ain’t good enough fer you Een folk?”

“No, of course it is,” Uncle Griffinskitch said. “We would be happy to dine with you,
King
. My niece is just eager to complete our journey, but it certainly can wait one night.”

“It’s all settled then,” Pugglemud said cheerfully. He snapped his greasy fingers, and a small Dwarf servant appeared before him.

“My Lord?” the Dwarf asked. He had a very short beard, and Kendra guessed that he was just a boy.

“Show these folks up to a room so that they can freshen up before grub time,” Pugglemud commanded.

“As you wish, your majesty,” the Dwarf boy returned with a bow.

“I don’t like this one bit,” Kendra whispered to Oki as they followed the servant out of the grand hall. “I just don’t trust Pugglemud.”

“Me, neither,” Oki said. “What do you think he’s up to?”

“I don’t know,” Kendra replied. “But something smells rotten in the land of Umbor.”

“Well, I hope it’s not dinner,” Oki said, rubbing his furry tummy. “I’m looking forward to a decent meal tonight!”