Killer in Crinolines (19 page)

“He still could have done in the jackass; our shrimp guy was right there at the wedding.”

“Let’s go with the idea that the same person did both. Too much of a coincidence for it not to be.”

“Well, there you go, shrimp guy drops to the bottom of our suspect list and pushes that infuriating skunk of a human being who accused me of out-and-out blatant thievery to the top along with his grave-visiting henchman.”

“What about GA and her dead-people cookies? She sure has motive.”

“I can’t see her knocking off you-know-who. The infuriating skunk on the other hand didn’t like the loan-shark jackass for multiple reasons, and he and his henchman are all in a sweat over that there golf course. There’s no connection between the golf course and GA. We’ll run out to Whitemarsh after you close up and ask the infuriating skunk point blank what’s going on. Don’t dawdle.”

“We? I’m going to Beaufort tonight remember? Clothes? New consigner?”

“Doc Hunky wants to take
you
dancing. A little birdie told him that you had some mighty fine moves and are even teaching classes to perfect them. That birdie said you are one sexy dish and have the skirt to prove it and can even be persuaded on occasion to wear it. All he has to do is call you over and over and over again till you say yes.”

“You didn’t.”

“Not yet but if you keep up this nonsense about Beaufort and a new customer, I have Doc Hunky’s number committed to memory.”

“W
ELL,
come on,” KiKi said to me at six o’clock as I closed up the Fox. “You’re late. We got to get moving if we’re going all the way out to Whitemarsh.”

“I had customers, paying customers. I just couldn’t tell them to go away, now could I?”

“There’re more important things than money.”

“Spoken by someone who has more than enough.” I scooped up Old Yeller, clipped BW to his leash, then locked the front door behind me.

“Honey,” KiKi said, looking at Bruce Willis. “I like this here dog and take my grand-auntie status right serious but I don’t think he should be coming with us out to Waverly Farms. We’ll be unwelcome enough as it is and I do believe that’s putting it mildly.”

“We’re not going to Waverly Farms and it has nothing to do with me heading over to Beaufort without you so don’t be having a hissy right here on my front porch and dialing up Doc Hunky. The thing is, we can’t just walk up to Reese and say, hey, Reese, old boy, why did you go and have Sugar-Ray kill Simon?”

“Well, he accused me of walking into his house and stealing his flash drive easy enough.”

“He knew there was a good chance he was right and I’m not so sure he had Sugar-Ray do in Simon. Besides, there’s a big difference between being accused of flash drive–napping and murder.” I held up the ice cream social card I got in the mail. “We’re going here instead. One of the gals from the Daughters of the Confederacy shopped at the Fox today and said she was in a state of total astonishment and needing something perky. Seems Waynetta Waverly had just volunteered to help out at the ice cream social to raise money for the cannon. Everyone’s scrambling to look their best or Waynetta will gossip about them behind their backs. Waynetta never volunteers for anything.”

“Why now, I wonder. I surely can’t see her having one of those life-changing revelations of doing good for all mankind and saving the world because Simon up and died on her.”

“It’s more like saving Waynetta. When we were out at Waverly Farms dropping off the deviled eggs and you were busy fainting on the stairway, I was spending time with our local princess, remember? She had a meltdown about needing to be in mourning for some months over Simon’s untimely kicking the bucket. The reason she’s volunteering tonight is to get out of the house and this is a respectable way of doing it.”

“Well, if that don’t beat all. It’s worth a trip to the park just to see Waynetta doing something helpful for a change.” KiKi patted BW and we started down Gwinnett.

“The plan is for us to be friendly and sympathetic and pump her for information,” I said. “She could very well know something that she doesn’t realize is important. You have to admit that us meeting up with her is a lot safer than a face-to-face with Reese and his gun collection.”

“I suppose I could do with a scoop or two of Old Black Magic. Lord knows I’ll have to get my fill now before Putter comes back in town. I think the man’s getting right serious about me losing weight. This is what happens from marrying a heart surgeon.”

Hot and humid made for perfect ice cream weather. “Georgia on My Mind” drifted out of the park, people mixing and mingling. Two kids stopped to pet BW, their faces painted to look like Mickey Mouse and Elmo. We walked past the fountain, the mere sound of splashing water dropping the temperature a good ten degrees. Under the expanse of oaks, crowds gathered behind long tables lined with gallons of ice cream packed in iced tubs. The daughters scooped cones and cups and passed around chocolate sauce and sprinkles.

KiKi nodded at the end of the line to Waynetta dressed in a simple white dress, hair pulled back in a clip, Daddy Waverly no doubt nixing the usual tiara. “Look who’s in charge of handing out spoons? I imagine an ice cream scoop is pretty much a foreign instrument.”

“Hi,” I said to Waynetta as we came her way. Wonderful night for—”

“Jeez Louise, that is your dog?” Waynetta asked taking a step back and pointing to BW, her lip doing the Waynetta curl. “Why?”

If I stabbed that
witch
with a
b
right here on the spot with one of her own spoons, I’d never get the answers I needed for Chantilly. I’d have to just suck up the insults for now but one of these days . . . “This is Bruce Willis.”

“Crying shame to disgrace a fine actor in such a way, if you ask me.”

BW flopped down and rolled over on his back, tail wagging and waiting for Waynetta to scratch his tummy. Like that was going to happen. I gritted my teeth and said, “KiKi and I were wondering how you were doing.”

“I’m doing fair, thank you kindly for asking, that’s mighty neighborly of you.”

KiKi smiled but it wasn’t the natural kind that comes with being happy and wanting to spend time with a friend. It was more of a sneer-smile. Auntie KiKi was never good at sucking it up; she was an ace at subtle warfare Southern style.

“Why, honey,” she cooed. “With that vicious old rumor making the rounds about how you did in Simon at your very own wedding, Reagan and I thought you might be a bit upset this evening and we were deeply concerned for your welfare.”

Waynetta blinked a few times, not quite believing what she’d just heard. Heck, I blinked a few times myself not quite believing it. Waynetta dropped the basket of spoons, white plastic littering the ground. “Wherever did you hear such an outrageous lie?” she whispered in a tight panicked voice, cutting her eyes side to side to see if anyone overheard. “Mercy me, how do these things get started?”

“So it’s not true?” KiKi asked, brows arched innocently in surprise. “Not that I ever considered it was, of course. Why, sugar, you’re looking a little under the weather. How can I be of assistance?” Without waiting for a reply, KiKi kicked the dirty spoons under the table and handed off the basket to an unsuspecting Mayor Gillespie as he walked by. Being this was an election year the mayor took on the job all smiles and KiKi led Waynetta to one of the tables out of the flow of traffic.

“Here,” I said, handing Waynetta a bottle of water I bought from a vender. We all sat down, BW on the alert for a dropped cone and me on the alert in case the cone was chocolate. “This will make you feel better.”

“Why would someone think I killed Simon of all things?” Waynetta gasped between gulps from the bottle.

I patted her hand. “I’m sure some folks figure that Simon doing the afternoon delight with your bridesmaid must have given you cause for concern and made you act in haste. If you gave Simon what he so richly deserved, everyone would understand completely.”
They might put you in jail for the rest of your natural life, but they would understand.

Waynetta stared wide-eyed. “That is truly what everyone thinks?”

KiKi and I gave a solemn and sincere nod and hoped to not get struck dead by a righteous lightning bolt out of the blue.

“Oh, dear.” Waynetta guzzled more water. “Daddy tried and tried to warn me about Simon, but I wouldn’t listen. When I heard that no-good varmint grunting and groaning in that closet I decided to cancel the wedding on the spot. I went back to my room and was in the process of taking off my dress to end it all when one of the staff came to fetch me saying I needed to come right quick to the dining room, that something fearful had happened to Simon. I was terrible afraid Daddy had enough of Simon’s shenanigans and went and put a bullet between his beady little ratty eyes. My only regret was that I didn’t do in Simon myself, though it would have taken some doing to snatch that peach dress, get out of my wedding dress, meet up with Simon, then get back to my room and redress and all the while not be seen. Being that I was a simply stunning bride, surely someone would notice me out and about like that.”

The stunning part was up for grabs but getting noticed was dead-on. “Of course,” I said in agreement to keep Waynetta talking. The one thing for sure about Waynetta was if you kept the topic centered on her, she’d keep on chatting away. “Did your daddy know what was going on with Simon and his escapades in the closet?”

“I suspect he knew Simon was fooling around all along and deep down I knew it, too. I just didn’t want to admit it, and daddy didn’t want to tell me and get me all upset. I’d planned the wedding of my dreams after all. Least I was smart in one way and got that dirtbag to sign a prenuptial agreement. If we’d married and it didn’t work out, he wouldn’t walk off with all my money, just a hundred thousand or so.”

Just
and
hundred thousand
didn’t fit in the same sentence as far as I was concerned. “Your daddy was involved in building a new golf course?”

Waynetta gave a little pout. “Don’t know why it couldn’t be a shopping mall. I despise those little carts people ride around in. They’re not even air-conditioned, for Pete’s sake. Simon and Daddy knew all about the new golf course. Fact is, they had words and Daddy told Simon to keep his mouth shut if he knew what was good for him. I do believe the whole affair is rather hush-hush.”

Waynetta took another gulp of water. “I need to get back and hand out more spoons. The Daughters are going to be upset with me if I shirk my responsibilities and right now a little volunteer work is all Daddy’s allowing me do. He said I needed to be respectful of Simon’s memory if I’m ever to marry into a nice Savannah family.”

“Did you ever think about not marrying?” I blurted, thinking maybe Waynetta would get the hint that she had really bad husband karma.

Waynetta threw back her head and laughed. “You say the funniest things, Reagan Summerside. Whatever would I do without a fine man on my arm? What would any girl do?” She gave me a
Waynetta the superior
look. “You know right well how it feels to be all alone. It’s just plain terrible, don’t you agree? ’Course some things can’t be helped now can they? I’ll have Daddy make a donation to the children’s hospital in my name with some kind of ribbon-cutting ceremony involved. Everyone will forget Simon even existed and simply focus on that till this here ugly gossip goes away.”

Waynetta wandered back to her station at the ice cream table and reclaimed her basket from the mayor. Only someone running for office can make handing out a spoon look like an accomplishment. KiKi rested her chin in her palm. “Money may not buy happiness, but for Waynetta it sure covers up a lot of messes.”

“Well, she was right about one thing, she couldn’t have knocked off Simon. Getting in and out of the dresses was impossible considering the time line and for sure she would have been noticed. But did you catch the part about dear old daddy wanting to put a bullet between Simon’s eyes?”

“Add to that, Reese found out the golf course was a hustle and Simon was taking him for a bundle, he had to be fed up with his future son-in-law.” KiKi sat back in her chair. “But this is all guesswork on our part. We need proof, something in writing. A check from Reese to Simon for the golf course would be nice.”

“What we need is Simon’s notebook. I bet the information in there might be enough for Detective Ross to at least consider that someone else, like Reese Waverly, had a motive to kill Simon. My guess is Suellen took it from me to carry on with Simon’s sharking business or to hide the fact that she and Simon were partners in something totally illegal, or Sugar-Ray took it because it implicates Reese.”

“Why didn’t Simon just put the thing in a safety-deposit box to begin with?”

“Too much trouble to record information if he did that. I’m sure he had the information on a computer somewhere but that’s probably in the nearest landfill by now. Since Suellen’s place is unoccupied we can start looking there for the notebook. The waitress at the Pirate House said Suellen had one of the new town houses on East Taylor.”

“That’s two short little old blocks from here.” KiKi wiggled her foot. “I can make it that far but how will we know which house is Suellen’s and how are we going to get inside the place?”

There was no
we
to this little dilemma. When it came to verbally duking it out with the local snobs, no one put them in their place faster and with more finesse than Auntie KiKi, but this was different. This was breaking the law and Mamma asked me to keep KiKi out of trouble. That she’d already fallen off a fire escape and gotten caught pilfering a flash drive meant
mission not accomplished
. Maybe I’d luck out this time, though truth be told, keeping Auntie KiKi out of trouble was like herding cats.

“You know,” I said, studying KiKi’s ankle. “It seems a little swollen. You need to rest tonight; we can hit Suellen’s place some another time.”

I got the beady-eyed glare as an answer; so much for lucking out.

“You’re not fooling me,” KiKi huffed. “You don’t want me around in case something goes wrong, and my guess is your mamma put you up to this, telling you to watch out for me or some such nonsense. I’m no coward. I watch
Law and Order
. I can take the heat.”

“Of course you’re not a coward. You escaped from a closet and crawled though bat poop. That’s brave in anyone’s book.”

“And I can get along on this here ankle just fine, thank you very much. But . . .”

Oh, thank the Lord in heaven, there’s a
but
!